Zbornik Mednarodnega literarnega srečanja Vilenica 2004 - Ljudmila

Barbara Simoniti
I got up from the dishevelled bed and dressed quickly. I pulled trousers
and a jumper over myself, in evening autumn colours.
The receptionist followed me with an empty look that was hiding his
curiosity beneath a thin polish of servile distance.
I sped up, down towards the Ljubljanica river and across the three intertwined
bridges. The sky was dark blue in the light of the full moon.
Everything was the way she used to describe it to me. The renovated
faŤades of ancient palaces shone silently in the moonlight. Already, I was
by the fountain. The square narrowed gradually – and the house stood in
front of me, bluntly colourless in the crust of old plaster. I looked into the
muddy eyes of ramshackle windows. I went into the yard along the vaulted
carriageway and propped myself against the stony corner. An arched gallery
divided by decayed timber rose above the rectangular pavement. And
above it, there was the high, blue, silver-lined sky.
I am here, Grandma. In your Ljubljana. I do not know whether I should
feel sorry or glad. I am back. I brought you back.
It is just that I do not know what is to become of me.
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