Oct 2023. Blues Vol 39 No. 10

DR. TINA JAECKLE blue

DR. TINA JAECKLE blue mental health Give Yourself the Gift of Hope Many of our nation’s law enforcement officers have had a challenging year in countless ways. The 2023 statistics for line-of-duty deaths (especially by gunfire) and suicides in this field are staggering and can be overwhelming. The impending holidays are also often a difficult time for LEO families due to work schedules, family conflict, financial constraints, and at times, a sense of helplessness due to depression and lack of hope. We also live in a world in which the comparison of our lives to others is commonplace and frequently perpetuated by social media and high expectations for the “perfect” holiday experience. It can place a great deal of unnecessary pressure on an LE family during an already stressful time of the year. Instead of this month’s article focusing solely on the negative, I want to offer the gift of hope through some basic approaches that are designed to reduce psychological stressors and increase hope for the holiday season. Amy Morgan (Police1, 2019) offered the following excellent suggestions, and I encourage you to practice these often. 1. STOP COMPARING. If you find yourself comparing your holiday with others, stop and focus on what matters to you, and then let that be enough. Be content with where you are, who you are, and what you have. If you are financially stressed, don’t worsen the situation by giving gifts to try to match the actions of others. Instead, give of yourself and work with what you have, but don’t deplete yourself in the process or let comparisons make you feel unworthy. 2. SET REALISTIC EXPEC- TATIONS. All the hype around the holidays makes us feel like we should ramp up our energy, our home décor, our financial ability, our time with friends and family, and even our level of happiness. Instead, set your expectations in line with the reality of your little piece of the world. If you aren’t a cook, don’t expect to present your family with a golden holiday turkey and all the fixings. Set realistic expectations about how your own holiday will and DR. TINA JAECKLE should look for your own life. 3. LET GO OF REGRET. Maybe this wasn’t your best year. If something in your life you wish was different, and you still can change it, start working on it. But if you can’t change something, try letting go of the feeling of regret that’s eating away at you. If you need to apologize to someone, do it genuinely and sincerely. If you need to forgive someone, do it, for your own sense of peace. And then move on. Let go of the regrets so you can start new free of stress and anxiety. 4. ACCEPT YOUR STRUG- GLES. Life is hard sometimes, and nobody is getting through it as easily as they may make it seem. Things may be hard for you for many reasons – it is okay to admit that things aren’t great. 166 The BLUES

Accept that we all struggle at different points in life with different things. Don’t let the season make you focus on the struggles – remember that this season and its challenges will pass. 5. TAKE THE TIME TO EX- ERCISE. You do not have to jump right into CrossFit if you have not exercised regularly, but get out for at least a brisk walk and break a sweat. You will feel and think better. You can also do this three times a week and invite your spouse, partner, and/or children to walk with you to enjoy family time. 6. GIVE BACK TO OTHERS. A local FOP hosts an “adopt a LE retiree or survivor” each holiday and encourages others to take them to lunch, provide a gift card, or give the gift of “presence.” There are numerous charities and opportunities available this time of year, including for children. Giving to others allows a mental shift of perspective away from our struggles toward better understanding and connecting with others. Remember, we rise by lifting others. Most importantly, practice hope, even a little every day. It makes a greater difference than you might believe. The BLUES 167