Issue 1 Draft 3

the same thing
By Shahaan Razak
M3, Harvard Medical School
day: three of ppsp
he: a young patient with colorectal cancer from dc
me: trying to make sense of what this disease
means, wondering
but, She had the same thing
She: helped raise me as a little kid in queens
imparting wisdom, on my world of green
the cousin, more a big sis
always love, always this
him: here, Her: i miss
even though, She had the same thing
both: diagnosed young, no signs in sight
fought for their lives, with all their might
he wins, She dies
why?
they had the same thing
because She worked too much to stop and look?
because She didn’t have that paper that said She
read enough books?
did She pray to the right one? was it because She
was a woman?
what about Her immigrant status? but She spoke
the language, such madness
did they miss it because of Her weight? because
Her insurance wouldn’t pay?
was Her money too light, Her gayness too heavy,
to make them stay?
marginalized of the marginalized, which label is to
blame?
does it matter? will the answer keep me sane?
no, because She had the same thing
day after day, i witness their personal stories, in
awe of their strength
smiling through struggle, lessons with length
seared in my mind, as a physician -
be that different kind of kind
the one that asks why with purpose, not as a cry
who brings people in, and is never too high
to learn, to grow
to continuously push the envelope
because She had the same thing
i won’t choose who lives and who dies
my choice is in my actions, where my power lies
words of mine will soon carry newfound meaning
be conscious of the way i build my practice of
healing
wisdom from a fellow scholar, ‘everything counts’
can i bear that burden?
yes, because She had the same thing
whispers: you’re not perfect
these self-imposed boulders
you place on these naive shoulders
will make you crumble before you even begin
me: i don’t want to go fast, or i would have gone
alone
i want to go far, so i will go together
standing on the shoulders of giants, arms locked
with this new wave of leaders
with one goal in mind
to leave it, a little better than i found it
in hopes that one day, the outcome would be the
same thing
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