A Rightless Father

I had begun to prepare her for single parenthood during the spring by
telling her of my plans to get loose of her. This was to happen in August
at the latest. I thought all this was chivalrous. I regarded it correct
to assist her in caring for the baby right after the birth.
I always emphasized these two: I would absolutely hold on to my
child and I would have kept the mother, too, but I cannot alone sustain
our relation by being submissive continuously. The woman replied, I
should have told that earlier last autumn, in the ‘abortion time’, for
she never wanted to become a single mother. Again a threat followed
that she will not let me see my daughter. The brave chap that I am, I
thought to myself: just go ahead bullying, the more reason I have to
leave you! She even reminded me that she has never intended to invite
me into the christening; she will arrange a closed occasion for her own
relatives only. Such a nice person was she!
Our baby, a girl child, came into the world through a caesarean on the
Saturday 6 th of June at 12.48 o’clock. A section was used; the mother
did not want to deliver in the natural way. I was now a double father.
Firstly I had bred the child, but secondly had also rescued her, my becoming
daughter, from being aborted. The mother planned having an
abortion seriously. The birth of this little one was possible, since I had
been her lifeguard for the very first four months of the pregnancy.
I picked up the mother and the child from the hospital and transported
them to their home, where I spent five days nursing the baby. That
time brightened to me that it will not be in the best interest of the child
to experience the quarrel of her parents daily. I decided to cut off never
mind the consequences. She spent the mid-summer weekend at her
cottage. Having returned home she got to hear from me I cannot cohabit
with her. Her response was instant: at first tears, then an announcement
that I have no access to my child.
From this on, eventful hand wrestle in various forms began about the
child access, which has never in fact ceased just as she had threatened
at the very beginning, and which I was to see in the years to come.
My father called me up and told that he and my sister are about to
come to see the baby. They knew nothing of our break off. In my turn,
I phoned to the mother and asked if it could be possible for my father
to experience grand parenthood for the first time. She was positive.