red dwarf – season seven
red dwarf – season seven
red dwarf – season seven
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ed <strong>dwarf</strong> <strong>season</strong> <strong>seven</strong> part two small black beetles: the overkill<br />
mission, the fearless Rimmer had to dice with death<br />
on a daily basis. Sometimes it needed a strong mind<br />
and cool nerves to hold the crew together:<br />
KRYTEN: Asteroid belt up ahead, sir.<br />
RIMMER: No it isn't Kryten, you thick, titanium plank;<br />
those are large, broken fragments of a dying star which<br />
have compressed together under enormous pressure,<br />
causing them to compress into large fragments.<br />
KRYTEN: You're quite right, sir, as usual. How could I<br />
have made such an elementary mistake? As usual.<br />
THE CREW COMMENTS<br />
CAT: It's at times like these that I get really sca<strong>red</strong>!<br />
LISTER: That never happened! I swear that never<br />
happened! I feel sick!<br />
KRYTEN: I'm sorry, sir, it is a bit bumpy.<br />
LISTER: It's what I'm seeing that's making me sick!<br />
RIMMER EXPERIENCE<br />
RIMMER: So you see, Cat? If you wear the green paisley<br />
shirt with the cavalry-twill trousers, you can be<br />
dignified and fashionable at the same time.<br />
THE CREW COMMENTS<br />
CAT: Let me at him! I'm gonna kill him! Cavalry-twill?<br />
What does he think I am? A woodwork teacher?<br />
KRYTEN: Wait a minute; here comes the best bit...<br />
RIMMER EXPERIENCE<br />
RIMMER: If you're in trouble he will save the day, He's<br />
brave and he's fearless come what may, Without him<br />
the mission would go astray... He's Arnold, Arnold,<br />
Arnold Rimmer, Without him life would be much<br />
grimmer, He's handsome, trim, and no-one's<br />
slimmer, He will never need a Zimmer. He's Arnold,<br />
Arnold, Arnold Rimmer, More reliable than a garden<br />
strimmer, He's never been mistaken for Yul Brynner,<br />
He's not bald and his head doesn't glimmer. Master of<br />
the wit and the repartee, His command of Space<br />
Directives is uncanny, How come he's such a genius?<br />
Don't ask me... Ask Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer,<br />
He's also a fantastic swimmer, And if you play your<br />
cards right, then he just might come 'round for<br />
dinner.<br />
THE CREW COMMENTS<br />
LISTER: I never wanna see or hear from that scumsucking,<br />
lying, weasel-minded smegger in my entire<br />
life!<br />
KRYTEN: Sigmund Freud: eat your heart out!<br />
page 12
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