murakami, haruki - Norwegian wood

I felt myself reddening. "I'm just saying what I really think." "Sure, I
know," said Reiko, smiling. When the rice was done soon after that, I
oiled the pan and arranged the ingredients for sukiyaki.
"Tell me this isn't a dream," said Reiko, sniffing the air.
"No, this is 100 per cent realistic sukiyaki," I said. "Empirically
speaking, of course."
Instead of talking, we attacked the sukiyaki with our chopsticks, drank
lots of beer, and finished up with rice. Seagull turned up, attracted by
the smell, so we shared our meat with her. When we had eaten our fill,
we sat leaning against the porch pillars looking at the moon.
"Satisfied?" I asked.
"Totally," she groaned. "I've never eaten so much in my life."
"What do you want to do now?"
"Have a smoke and go to a public bath. My hair's a mess. I need to
wash it."
"No problem. There's one down the street."
"Tell me, Watanabe, if you don't mind. Have you slept with that girl
Midori?"
"You mean have we had sex? Not yet. We decided not to until things
get sorted out."
"Well, now they're sorted out, wouldn't you say?"
I shook my head. "Now that Naoko's dead, you mean?"
"No, not that. You made your decision long before Naoko died - that
you could never leave Midori. Whether Naoko is alive or dead, it has
nothing to do with your decision. You chose Midori. Naoko chose to
die. You're all grown up now, so you have to take responsibility for
your choices. Otherwise, you ruin everything."
"But I can't forget her," I said. "I told Naoko I would go on waiting for
her, but I couldn't do it. I turned my back on her in the end. I'm not
saying anyone's to blame: it's a problem for me myself. I do think that
things would have worked out the same way even if I hadn't turned
my back on her. Naoko was choosing death all along. But that's beside
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