The Courage of Children: Boston and Beyond XXXIII

cruelly, like they were a needle in a candy bar. Instead of trying the system,
I sank deeper into my anxiety. Then, just as a toddler can’t resist a cookie, the
pressure became relentless, and I felt ready to give the methods a try. I learned
how to focus and use the strategies during situations when I would normally be
scared. It wasn’t very helpful at first, but after a series of more problems, I
realized that I had to put in more effort to recover, or I would feel like a wimp
forever. After pepping myself up, I started recuperating faster. The techniques
worked, and I became happier and more outgoing. I felt more comfortable
conversing with people at school.
There was only one thing stopping me from living my best life again. Bad
memories of my anxiety brought on lots of embarrassment, and I was too afraid
to tell anyone about it. I was worried that they would bully me for it and that
I would lose my friends. Finally, after some contemplation, I opened up to a
couple of close friends from school, people I knew I could trust. To my pleasant
surprise, they regarded me respectfully. Now, whenever I feel anxious, they can
calm me down. They supported me when I needed them most, and because of
this, I became the happiest I’d been ever since I first started my bout of anxiety.
Over time, I tried to completely lose my anxiety and become “normal” again.
It felt like a disability, and I didn’t want it. Yet after a little bit, I realized that
my anxiety was a part of me. It wasn’t some awful disease, and it didn’t make
me weak; it made me stronger. Those thoughts helped me feel more natural,
like life was finally going back to the way it used to be, and I could sink back
into the comfort of my old customs and personality. Soon, I started to feel good
about school. I didn’t feel nervous at soccer practice anymore. In the end, I was
back to being the funny, talkative person I had been before. I felt like me.
Overall, this experience taught me that even if you’re scared, you should push
through it anyway. Being fearless is impossible, but being courageous is not.
Using your courage is something any ordinary person can do. It’s okay to be
scared. The impressive thing about being courageous is that you don’t crawl
into a hole and die, or get so embarrassed you never speak again. Even if you’re
so embarrassed that your cheeks are scarlet and inflamed and covered in hives,
even if you’re shaking like a leaf and can’t make yourself stop, even if it feels like
you’ve lost all your hope, you shouldn’t give up without a fight. That’s not
realistic. You have to get over your fears somehow. Forget the odds. You have
to be strong and persist, or you’ll never live life to the fullest. That’s exactly
what I did. I was brave in the darkest of times, and I overcame my challenge.
Although I still get anxious from time to time, I have gotten good enough at
using my methods that now, I get to control it. This time, I get to be the
puppeteer. After all these years, I am in control of my own life. The invisible
strings are gone, and I’m finally myself again.
THE COURAGE OF CHILDREN: BOSTON AND BEYOND
VOLUME XXXIII
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