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THE MURDER/MYSTERY ISSUE • INTRODUCING THE MORTICIA SHAWL<br />

13<br />

THE PUZZLEBOX BLANKET • THE WEAPON OF CHOICE COWL • GREEN HATS


Unless otherwise indicated the information, articles, artwork, patterns and photography<br />

published in <strong>BLOCKED</strong> Magazine are subject to copyright ©2024 <strong>BLOCKED</strong> Magazine.<br />

All rights reserved.<br />

<strong>BLOCKED</strong> Magazine permits the online distribution of the magazine in its entirety.<br />

Distribution of any of the contents of this magazine for purposes of sale or resale is<br />

strictly prohibited.<br />

TEAM <strong>BLOCKED</strong><br />

Editor in Chief<br />

Neil James<br />

For all enquiries:<br />

blockedmagazine@gmx.com<br />

Layouts, Graphics, and Ads<br />

BS Designs<br />

Copy Editor, Tech Editor,<br />

Head of Games/Puzzles Content<br />

Cézanne Pellett<br />

Head of Review Content<br />

Katie Gerwien<br />

Joint Heads of Geographical<br />

and Historical Content<br />

Yelena of Scythia<br />

Amy D<br />

Cover Photography<br />

Tabitha of Murderknits<br />

Content Writers<br />

D. Marie Prokop<br />

Micah-in-Stitches<br />

Katie Gerwein<br />

Neil James<br />

Cézanne Pellett<br />

Amy D<br />

Mommy Dreary<br />

Editorial Assistants<br />

Karen Juliano<br />

Laura Neubauer<br />

Pattern Designers<br />

Tabitha of Murderknits<br />

Liz Clothier<br />

Deplorable Knitter<br />

Neil James<br />

Anne Pinkava<br />

KNITTING ABBREVIATIONS<br />

1-1 RC (Right Cable): Sl 1 st to cn, hold to back,<br />

k1, k1 from cn.<br />

3-3 RC (Right Cable): Sl 3 st to cn, hold to back,<br />

k3, k3 from cn.<br />

CC: Contrast Color<br />

CN: Cable Needle<br />

German Twisted Cast-On:<br />

1. Leave a tail of yarn that is approximately 3-4 times as long<br />

as your project will be wide, then make a slip knot.<br />

2. Wrap yarn around your thumb and index finger in the<br />

"slingshot" position.<br />

3. Bring RH needle under both strands of yarn around<br />

thumb then down into thumb opening.<br />

4. Bring RH needle back up and grab strand from index<br />

finger, then bring needle tip down through thumb opening.<br />

5. Release yarn from around your thumb and tighten loop<br />

on needle.<br />

Repeat steps 3-5 until you have the desired number<br />

of stitches cast on.<br />

K: Knit<br />

K2tog: Knit 2 sts together<br />

K2tog tbl: Knit 2 sts together through back loop.<br />

LH: Left Hand<br />

K1 f/b/f: (Knit front/back/front) Knit into the front of the<br />

next stitch, then into the back of the same stitch, and once<br />

more through the front.<br />

LT (left twist – without cable needle):<br />

1. Slip first st knitwise, slip next st knitwise.<br />

2. Return sts to LH needle.<br />

3. Knit into the back of second st.<br />

4. Knit into the back of both sts together.<br />

5. Drop both sts from needle.<br />

MC: Main Color<br />

P: Purl<br />

P2tog: Purl 2 sts together<br />

RH: Right Hand<br />

Sl: Slip stitch, always slip sts purlwise unless<br />

otherwise indicated.<br />

St(s): Stitch(es)<br />

Tbl: Through back loop.


Dear Readers,<br />

Welcome to the first issue of 2024!<br />

To celebrate 2 years of Blocked I decided to give Team Blocked promotions. I’m now<br />

Editor-in-Chief; because why not?<br />

Blocked now has a pair of in-house tech editors. Cézanne has been studying for the<br />

Tech Editor qualification for the last 12 months and should be fully accredited within the<br />

next 6 months.<br />

Annie is about to begin the course with a view to gaining accreditation in approximately<br />

18 months. Once accredited, both will be free to offer tech editing services to designers<br />

everywhere.<br />

Having a tech editor on board has made a significant difference to the quality and<br />

standardisation of patterns. Prior to Cezzie taking on the task it was always a bit inconsistent;<br />

with some designers having their own tech editor and others not.<br />

In addition to being a tech editor, Cezzie is also taking on the role of copy editor. This<br />

means that before general release, whilst Patrons have the preview, Cezzie will take one<br />

last look over the text to check for any stubborn errors. An error or 2 invariably slips<br />

through the net, we’re a team of volunteers after all, with jobs, and lives, and with an Editor-in-Chief<br />

with a memory like a sieve!<br />

You’ll notice this issue has fewer ads than usual. I took the decision to remove all the<br />

ads as some of the vendors/podcasters/vloggers are no longer operating, no longer affiliated<br />

with Blocked, or have old details listed. If you would like your ad reinstated, please<br />

contact me at: blockedmagazine@gmail.com<br />

This issue’s theme is “Murder/Mystery.” Most (but not all) of the patterns and articles<br />

have a link to the murder/mystery genre in one form or another. As always there was some<br />

criticism of the choice of theme. I read some vague complaint about celebrating murderers<br />

and causing harm, blah blah. I’m quite certain no real-life murderers have even<br />

been mentioned!<br />

You will find all the future 2024 themes and deadline dates here. As always, these<br />

themes are for inspiration only and can be interpreted in any way you choose. They’re not<br />

conditional for publication. If you have any ideas for themes throughout 2025 feel free to<br />

send them to the email address above.<br />

Enjoy and get Blocked!<br />

Yours faithfully,<br />

Neil<br />

Editor-in-Chief<br />

3


Sweater Design Book Review, part 2<br />

by Katie Gerwien, aka khgknits<br />

The Knitter’s Handy Book of Top-Down Sweaters<br />

and 6000+ Pullover Possibilities,<br />

Interchangeable Options for Custom Knitted Sweaters<br />

4<br />

This a continuation of my review<br />

of books written to help<br />

knitters design sweaters to use<br />

the yarn of the knitter’s choosing,<br />

at the gauge the knitter likes,<br />

and with modifications the knitter<br />

wants to include.<br />

I selected Ann Budd’s The<br />

Knitter’s Handy Book of Top-<br />

Down Sweaters (Budd, 2012) for<br />

my list of books on this topic to<br />

review because top-down<br />

sweaters are quite popular with<br />

knitters. Budd explains in the Introduction<br />

to The Knitter’s<br />

Handy Book of Top-Down<br />

Sweaters that knitters had been<br />

asking her to modify the patterns<br />

in her famous The Knitter’s<br />

Handy Book of Sweater Patterns<br />

(Budd, 2007) to seamless and<br />

top-down knitting patterns. Thus,<br />

she wrote the book I am reviewing. Many knitters prefer<br />

top-down sweaters because they can try the sweater on as<br />

they knit it to check fit, particularly at the critical shoulder<br />

measurements, and adjust the body and sleeve length<br />

(very helpful if they are playing yarn chicken) as needed.<br />

Some knitters simply abhor sewing garment pieces together<br />

and so prefer seamless sweater patterns.<br />

As a hand spinner, I have five bins of handspun yarn in<br />

my stash. I have yet to spin a sweater’s quantity of yarn<br />

from the same fiber, but I can either combine several<br />

handspun yarns into a sweater or combine handspun yarn<br />

with commercial yarn to complete a sweater. It is a little<br />

more challenging for me to do this as my calculations for<br />

yardage with handspun are good estimates at best. Thus,<br />

I find the top-down sweater concept appealing for knitting<br />

with handspun yarn. I am knitting a sweater now from<br />

a combination of handspun and commercial yarn using<br />

the basic raglan sweater found in Budd’s The Knitter’s<br />

Handy Book of Top-Down Sweaters. I will address my experience<br />

after I complete the book review.<br />

The book provides instructions<br />

for knitting four sweater types:<br />

seamless yoke, raglan, set-in<br />

sleeve, and saddle shoulder, all<br />

from the top down. Basic information<br />

included in the first chapter,<br />

“Take It from the Top,”<br />

includes:<br />

● An explanation of the<br />

sweater styles in the book<br />

● Quick tips on how to use to<br />

book<br />

● Tips for faux seams<br />

● Tips for circular knitting<br />

● Selecting the perfect fit<br />

● Gauge, including tips for<br />

consistent gauge<br />

● Making changes for colorwork,<br />

stitch patterns,<br />

and length<br />

Budd provides a basic sweater<br />

design for each of the four sweater types in children’s<br />

chest sizes 26” to 34” (66 to 86.5 cm) women’s bust sizes<br />

36” to 44” (91.5 to 112 cm) and men’s chest sizes 46” to<br />

54” (117 to 137 cm). Each sweater type contains information<br />

on basic yarn requirements, provides a schematic<br />

for the sweater, and follows Budd’s typical pattern style of<br />

simple instructions interspersed between large charts, giving<br />

you stitch counts based on the size sweater you are<br />

knitting and your gauge. For each of the four sweater<br />

types, she includes several patterns of that style with specific<br />

design features, such as colorwork or stitch patterns.<br />

The designs are attractive and remain current.<br />

The final chapter, “Personal Touches,” provides advice<br />

on two methods of waist shaping, edging options, and<br />

button and buttonhole bands. There is also an abbreviations<br />

page and a techniques section with written descriptions<br />

and drawings. Increasing and decreasing options,<br />

mattress stitch, pick up and knit along edge, short rows<br />

and zippers, and a list of books for further reading on<br />

each topic are also discussed.<br />

Continued on next page...


Reviews... Continued...<br />

The book is physically easy to use. It has a hardbound<br />

cover with a spiral-bound interior, allowing the pages to<br />

lie flat and making it easy to follow the pattern directions.<br />

I think this book is better suited for knitters who have<br />

made at least one sweater already. It is a bit daunting for a<br />

knitter who has never knit a sweater to start one using this<br />

process. While I like Budd’s books as reference books for<br />

basic shaping and sizing, I find that following the patterns<br />

requires a lot of concentration. Between finding the right<br />

stitch count for the size you are knitting at your specific<br />

gauge, and reading the instructions between each chart, I<br />

often miss some of the instructions or select the wrong<br />

number on the chart. Therefore, I find myself using the<br />

book to select the<br />

stitch counts and typing<br />

the instructions on<br />

a separate piece of<br />

paper to make sure I<br />

don’t miss any steps. I<br />

recheck the stitch<br />

counts before I start<br />

knitting to make sure I<br />

have not selected the<br />

wrong numbers along<br />

the way.<br />

That being said, for<br />

the sweater I am knitting<br />

now, a top-down<br />

raglan, my ideal size<br />

was halfway between<br />

two size options on<br />

Budd’s chart, and my<br />

gauge was halfway between<br />

two gauge options<br />

on her chart.<br />

What to do? I set up<br />

equations in a spreadsheet<br />

program to determine the stitch counts between<br />

the two sizes and gauges. This took a bit of time. I also<br />

added short row shaping in the back neck to allow for a<br />

lower neckline in the front of the sweater. I printed the<br />

final document, which is far easier to carry along with the<br />

project than the book was. I found being able to try on<br />

the sweater as I have been knitting to be quite helpful so I<br />

can make sure the neckline and shoulders fit properly.<br />

This method also made it easier to decide on the most attractive<br />

place to switch between the handspun and commercial<br />

yarns.<br />

The second book I am reviewing in this article uses the<br />

same concept of providing stitch counts based on size<br />

and gauge, with written instructions before and after each<br />

chart. The book is 6000+ Pullover Possibilities, Interchangeable<br />

Options for Custom Knitted Sweaters (Leapman,<br />

2019).<br />

The similarity to Budd’s Top-Down Sweaters ends with<br />

the chart and instruction layout. All sweaters in this book<br />

are knit in pieces from the bottom up. Melissa Leapman<br />

points out that knitting sweaters in pieces allows for maximum<br />

flexibility in design customization, and the seams<br />

provide structure to knitted garments.<br />

Leapman’s book contains nine chapters, including an Introduction<br />

and How to Use the Book section. The How to<br />

Use This Book section provides direction on:<br />

• Yarn selection<br />

• Gauge swatching<br />

• Visual examples of the<br />

same sweater silhouette knit<br />

in three different yarn weights<br />

and gauges for their overall<br />

impact<br />

• Selecting from straight,<br />

shaped, a-line, tapered, or<br />

empire waist sweater silhouettes<br />

• Selecting from square indented,<br />

raglan, set-in, or saddle<br />

shoulder armhole<br />

construction<br />

• Selecting from round,<br />

scoop, v-neck, square,<br />

placket, or slit neckline and<br />

compatible neckline treatments<br />

• Selecting edge treatment<br />

for bottoms of front, back,<br />

and cuffs<br />

• Adding extra details<br />

• Yarn amount advice<br />

• How to select from 8 sizes ranging from 30” to 58” (76<br />

cm to 147.5 cm) bust<br />

• How to use the tables and schematic drawings<br />

• How to complete the fill-in-the-blank checklist to capture<br />

all your selections for your project<br />

The chapter “Backs” provides a good schematic for<br />

each back style (silhouette with matching armhole construction),<br />

with knitting instructions and stitch counts.<br />

The “Fronts” chapter provides a good schematic for<br />

each front style as well as a chart for the front neckline<br />

depths for each neckline shape and treatment. There is<br />

also advice on how to modify the neckline opening by<br />

using the back instructions until you reach the point where<br />

you need to work the neckline treatment.<br />

Continued on next page...<br />

5


Reviews... Continued...<br />

In the “Sleeves” chapter, Leapman provides a good<br />

schematic of sleeves and directions for selecting the<br />

sleeve construction based on which armhole construction<br />

was used for the back piece. There are icons given to<br />

match the armhole with the back. There are also schematics<br />

for each armhole shape, worked from wrist to<br />

shoulder, offering long and short sleeve options.<br />

The “Necklines” chapter provides the finishing directions<br />

for the neckline chosen, with icons given to match<br />

the front to the neckline. There is also a list of stitch-torow<br />

pick-up ratios for each neckline.<br />

The “Edge Treatments” chapter provides 19 options for<br />

ribbing or edges for the front, back, and cuff. The<br />

“Pockets” chapter provides 6 pocket options.<br />

The chapter “Pullover Possibilities” displays photos of 6<br />

completed sweaters with descriptions of what options<br />

were used to complete the sweaters.<br />

The Fill-in-the-Blanks Checklist provides a template for<br />

capturing all of your design decisions, from size, silhouettes,<br />

measurements, materials, gauge, etc., and the<br />

page numbers you need for shaping, edgings, etc. I<br />

would prefer to have the checklist at the beginning of the<br />

book instead of at the end of the book to aid in capturing<br />

decisions as you go through the book.<br />

The chapter “Inspiration and Information” provides an<br />

abbreviations list, a review of basic knitting techniques,<br />

and several finishing techniques including blocking,<br />

seaming with mattress stitch, backstitch and whipstitch,<br />

sewing in a zipper, weaving in ends, picking up stitches,<br />

and the order of sewing modular pieces together.<br />

The book has a hardcover and is spiral bound allowing<br />

the pages to lie flat, making it easy to follow the pattern<br />

directions.<br />

The book provides 6,000 sweater options. I don’t know<br />

that I can or want to make that many decisions! As a reference<br />

book, this book is very useful for silhouettes, sizing,<br />

and stitch counts. Again, I do not see this as a book for<br />

the first-time sweater knitter. There are too many options<br />

and decisions to make with this approach. I recommend<br />

this book for the knitter familiar with sweater knitting and<br />

ready to make the design decisions. If I do use this book, I<br />

will print a copy of the Fill-in-the-Blanks Checklist before I<br />

start making decisions to track my decisions as I work<br />

through each chapter.<br />

In terms of camp “Knit in Pieces” or camp “Knit From<br />

the Top Down in the Round,” I am in camp “Knit in<br />

Pieces,” as I find I can check for fit and length as<br />

I knit the pieces. Knitting smaller pieces is much<br />

easier to handle as each piece has far less<br />

weight on the needles. I am at the stage with my<br />

Ann Budd raglan sweater where the weight of<br />

the body is significant, and it takes forever to<br />

complete a row. Because of the weight on the<br />

needles, I can only knit 1 or 2 rows a day because<br />

I end up with achy wrists after knitting. I<br />

find blocking individual pieces versus an entire<br />

sweater preferable. Not only is it easier to pin<br />

the individual pieces to exact measurements,<br />

but the small pieces dry much faster than 2<br />

layers of a sweater do. I admit seaming pieces is<br />

not my favorite thing,<br />

but, with a little bit of<br />

patience, it gets done.<br />

However, if you prefer<br />

knitting from the top<br />

down, in the round, go<br />

for it. It is your knitting!<br />

Again, I wish you<br />

Happy Knitting!<br />

6<br />

The books in this article can be found on Amazon at the following links:<br />

https://www.amazon.com/Knitters-Handy-Book-Top-Down-Sweaters/dp/1596684836.<br />

https://www.amazon.com/6000-Pullover-Possibilities-Interchangeable-Sweaters/dp/1936096943


LET THEM<br />

LIVE HAT<br />

by Deplorable Knitter<br />

YARN<br />

40 g Worsted weight yarn<br />

Needles:<br />

US Size 8 (5mm) circular needles<br />

US Size 8 (5mm) double-pointed-needles<br />

NOTIONS<br />

Darning needle<br />

Stitch marker<br />

Scissors<br />

GAUGE<br />

20 sts x 28 rows = 4” x 4”<br />

SIZES<br />

Newborn: 9 1 ⁄2” circumference (unstretched) X 5” high<br />

0-3 months: 10 1 ⁄2” circumference (unstretched) x 5 1 ⁄2” high<br />

3-6 months: 11” circumference (unstretched) x 6” high<br />

6-12 months: 12” circumference (unstretched) x 6 1 ⁄2” high<br />

12-24 months: 13” circumference (unstretched) x 7” high<br />

PATTERN<br />

Cast on 50 (55, 60, 65, 70) using the twisted German cast on, or your favorite cast on.<br />

Place marker, join for knitting in the round, being careful not to twist your work.<br />

Work k4, p1 rib unit piece measures 3 ⁄4” ( 3 ⁄4”, 3 ⁄4”, 1”, 1”).<br />

Begin working the faux cable rib as follows:<br />

Round 1: *LT, k2, p1* repeat around.<br />

Round 2: *K1, LT, k1, p1* repeat around.<br />

Round 3: *K2, LT, p1* repeat around.<br />

Rounds 4 and 5: *K4, p1* repeat around.<br />

Work in the faux cable rib until approx. 1" shorter than desired length,<br />

being sure to end with Round 3.<br />

Begin decreases as follows:<br />

Round 1: *K2, k2tog tbl, p1* repeat around.<br />

Round 2: *K2tog tbl, k1, p1* repeat around.<br />

Round 3: *K2tog tbl, p1* repeat around.<br />

Round 4: *K2tog tbl* repeat around.<br />

Cut yarn and pull through remaining stitches. Weave in ends and enjoy!<br />

7


DISHIDENT #16<br />

by UKnitted Kingdom<br />

PATTERN DESCRIPTION<br />

Each issue of Blocked will contain a “secret”<br />

pattern. The design will only be revealed as you<br />

knit. The instructions might uncover an image, design,<br />

word, or message.<br />

When using cotton, these secret squares make<br />

excellent dishcloths. If you make 4 or 5 of each<br />

square in wool or acrylic, they can be seamed<br />

together at the end of the year to make a small<br />

Afghan or lap blanket.<br />

GAUGE & MATERIALS<br />

Each dishident uses approximately<br />

41 to 43g of worsted weight 100% cotton.<br />

Follow the yarn manufacturer’s<br />

recommended needle size.<br />

DIRECTIONS<br />

CO 45<br />

Row 1 [RS]: K45<br />

Row 2: K45<br />

Row 3: K45<br />

Row 4: K45<br />

Row 5: K45<br />

Row 6: K45<br />

Row 7: K45<br />

Row 8: K4, p6, k5, p26, k4<br />

Row 9: K45<br />

Row 10: K4, p4, k8, p25, k4<br />

Row 11: K45<br />

Row 12: K4, p4, k9, p24, k4<br />

Row 13: K45<br />

Row 14: K4, p5, k9, p23, k4<br />

Row 15: K45<br />

Row 16: K4, p6, k16, p15, k4<br />

Row 17: K45<br />

Row 18: K4, p7, k8, p4, k1, p1, k2, p14, k4<br />

Row 19: K45<br />

Dishident Continued on next page...<br />

8


Dishident Continued...<br />

Row 20: K4, p8, k8, (p2, k2) 2X, p13, k4<br />

Row 21: K45<br />

Row 22: K4, p9, k25, p3, k4<br />

Row 23: K45<br />

Row 24: K4, p5, k29, p3, k4<br />

Row 25: K45<br />

Row 26: K4, p6, k29, p2, k4<br />

Row 27: K45<br />

Row 28: K4, p5, k30, p2, k4<br />

Row 29: K45<br />

Row 30: K4, p8, k26, p3, k4<br />

Row 31: K45<br />

Row 32: K4, p8, k1, p23, k1, p4, k4<br />

Row 33: K45<br />

Row 34: K4, p37, k4<br />

Row 35: K45<br />

Row 36: K4, p17, k1, p4, k7, p8, k4<br />

Row 37: K45<br />

Row 38: K4, p7, k3, p7, k1, p5, k4, (k1, p4) 2X, k4<br />

Row 39: K45<br />

Row 40: K4, p4, (p1, k1, p4) 3X, p2, k3, p5, k1, p4, k4<br />

Row 41: K45<br />

Row 42: K4, p4, (p1, k1, p4) 3X, (p3, k1, p3) 2X, p1, k4<br />

Row 43: K45<br />

Row 44: K4, p4, (p1, k1, p4) 3X, (p3, k1, p3) 2X, p1, k4<br />

Row 45: K45<br />

Row 46: K4, p6, (k1, p3) 2X, (p1, k1) 3X, p5, k1, p6, k1, p4, k4<br />

Row 47: K45<br />

Row 48: K4, p8, k1, p6, k4, (k1, p5) 2X, p2, k1, p3, k4<br />

Row 49: K45<br />

Row 50: K4, p1, (p1, k1) 2X, p2, k3, p7, k1, p6, k3, p7, k1, p2, k4<br />

Row 51: K45<br />

Row 52: K4, (p1, k1, p2) 2X, k1, p8, k1, p5, k5, p6, k1, p2, k4<br />

Row 53: K45<br />

Row 54: K4, p7, k2, p7, k2, (k1, p6) 2X, (p2, k1) 2X, k3<br />

Row 55: K45<br />

Row 56: K4, p37, k4<br />

Row 57: K45<br />

Row 58: K45<br />

Row 59: K45<br />

Row 60: K45<br />

Row 61: K45<br />

Row 62: K45<br />

TIPS<br />

If preferred, slip the first OR the last stitch of every row to create a<br />

neater edge. When purling a stitch immediately after knitting a<br />

stitch, pull the excess yarn out of the purl stitch before knitting or<br />

purling on. This helps to reduce loose or baggy knit stitches.<br />

NOTES<br />

Occasionally, a dishident or secret square might not be<br />

suitable for children and “polite company”. This will be made<br />

clear when this is the case.<br />

If you would like to receive notifications of our next issue!<br />

Check out our Patreon!<br />

www.patreon.com/join/BlockedMagazine<br />

9


READ THE FULL<br />

STORY HERE!<br />

https://www.yumpu.com/en/document/view/68630139/whodoneknit<br />

10


By Amy From Two Stisters and Some Yarn<br />

WHO DONE KNIT?<br />

PART ONE<br />

**SUNDAY**<br />

It was a dark and stormy night. Crickets and owls<br />

created a symphony of the ni—<br />

“Oh for crying out loud.” I muttered to myself, hitting<br />

the delete key on my MacBook. Of all the cliche, ridiculous<br />

ways to start a mystery novel. I had the audacity to<br />

call myself a writer?<br />

I leaned back in the cushiony desk chair while my eyes<br />

wandered around Mimi’s office. What a packrat! Boxes of<br />

paperwork, photos, books, all piled everywhere. Photos<br />

of long dead family and friends cluttered the walls, faithfully<br />

dusted by Maria, Mimi’s weekly cleaning lady. Mimi’s<br />

cell phone still stared at me with the numbers of missed<br />

calls and voicemails that I’d neglected to answer since arriving<br />

two weeks ago. Everyone who needed to know<br />

she was gone, knew. Her funeral was short, sweet and to<br />

the point as she’d asked. No need to hurry when catching<br />

up on voicemails for the dead.<br />

I had a job to do: get Mimi’s affairs settled and head<br />

back to New York. Or I could head off to LA? To Boston? I<br />

could go wherever I wanted once the details were settled,<br />

and Mimi’s wishes granted. I, her only granddaughter,<br />

would get her fortune, to do with as I pleased. All<br />

Mimi had asked of me was to close out the “fiddly<br />

matters” and fulfill her one wish.<br />

I stood and stretched, then glanced down the hall to<br />

where that “one wish” resided. “Might as well tackle it<br />

now since I’m clearly not going to be the next Stephen<br />

King. I wonder if he talks to himself while he’s working?” I<br />

wondered aloud to myself. How much was my college<br />

debt again?<br />

I pushed open the door at the end of the hall, and<br />

gazed upon Mimi’s “one wish,” her voice still fresh in my<br />

ears: “Audrey, take what you want. Sell what you don’t.<br />

Give it to my friends, to charity knitters, to local yarn<br />

shops, even sell it on eBay! But for the love of God, do<br />

NOT just toss my yarn in the trash! If you throw it away, or<br />

give it to Goodwill, my heart would break and I’ll haunt<br />

you forever!”<br />

Shelves and shelves of yarn surrounded me. While the<br />

rest of the house may have been a mess of Saints<br />

posters, Mardi Gras masks, dead relatives’ portraits, and<br />

vintage kitchen tools, the yarn room was sacred. Ordered<br />

in the most OCD fashion, the yarn formed a squishy gradient<br />

of colors. Patterns were arranged in tidy plastic<br />

sheet protectors, sorted by type in binders accordingly.<br />

Needles sat in their original wrappers, organized by size<br />

in a hanging divider on an inside closet door. Her spinning<br />

wheel sat near her favorite chair, with a well worn<br />

end table and her crocheted mug coaster, which usually<br />

held her favorite mug that read “I like big balls and I cannot<br />

lie.” I had no idea if she truly got the joke.<br />

I sighed, wiped away the tear that had surreptitiously<br />

formed in my eye, and sat in her chair. How that woman<br />

loved her yarn, fiber, projects, and friends. The current<br />

works in progress, “WIPs” as Mimi had called them, hung<br />

on a coat rack in the corner in various brightly colored<br />

fabric bags. What was I supposed to do with those? She<br />

didn’t tell me that part! I remembered seeing something<br />

on Facebook about a group that finished projects for<br />

people after they passed. I added that to my mental todo<br />

list, categorized under “hopefully I can find it later.”<br />

Despite Mimi’s best efforts, I never learned to knit or<br />

crochet. That was for old ladies! But, man did she try. I<br />

was her only grandchild, a granddaughter, no less! Yet, I<br />

hated it. Mimi was beyond patient, I just lacked even the<br />

most basic hand-eye coordination. Okay, okay, maybe I<br />

never gave it more than five minutes of effort and I gave<br />

up, tossing the ball of yarn and needles aside to chase<br />

after the boys down the street or beg Mimi to take me for<br />

a ride on the streetcar.<br />

Now, the time has passed. Mimi was not going to<br />

teach me, and I had to deal with HUNDREDS of balls of<br />

yarn, and various other … things? I knew they had proper<br />

names, but I hadn’t bothered to learn them. “Why did<br />

she leave me anything? I certainly don’t deserve it!” I<br />

wailed.<br />

Continued on next page...<br />

11


By Amy From Two Stisters and Some Yarn<br />

12<br />

Ahh yes, she had no choice. I was it. Her lone relative.<br />

Papa was long gone and her only child, my father, died<br />

five years ago in a freak boating accident. My mother …<br />

Well, she was just a memory conjured up by stories from<br />

Mimi and Dad. She died shortly after my birth from complications,<br />

they told me in hushed tones, quickly changing<br />

the subject whenever I asked.<br />

So here I sat, in the old Uptown home, with its porch littered<br />

by the flyers of realtors begging me daily to list it<br />

with them, surrounded by yarn without even the slightest<br />

idea of its value, and it was my responsibility to handle it<br />

all. Clear it all out, take what I wanted, sell the rest, and<br />

prepare this house for another family to collect their own<br />

memories.<br />

But what in the world was I supposed to do with this<br />

yarn? I could just toss it and say “Mimi will never know.”<br />

But you know what they say about karma? I couldn’t defy<br />

an old woman’s dying wish unless I wanted to come back<br />

as a cockroach in another life!<br />

But sorting out the yarn was tomorrow's problem, as<br />

the music floated down the street and a cocktail was calling<br />

my name.<br />

**MONDAY**<br />

An answer came quicker than I’d anticipated to the<br />

yarn problem. Once I’d slept off the cocktails from the<br />

previous night, I finally checked her phone’s voicemail<br />

messages.<br />

“ROSIE! Hello lovely! I am SO excited to come to the<br />

Stitch and Sip! I cannot wait! I’ll bring my devilled eggs!”<br />

“WOMAN, of course I will be there! Did you try that<br />

new Ethan East shawl pattern? WHY does that man make<br />

so many holes in patterns? I’ll bring the dip!”<br />

“Rosie, sweetie, thank you so much for the invite! I will<br />

be there with bells on and that damn lace shawl I need<br />

help with!”<br />

“Rose. Please tell me you did not invite Evelyn to Stitch<br />

and Sip? You did, didn’t you? I guess I’ll come anyway.<br />

Get some good pinot this time.”<br />

“Rosie, say it ain’t so. You can’t be gone. Sonofa—”<br />

“Rosie, I mean, I don’t know who will hear this. You’re<br />

gone. This can’t be …”<br />

“Rose! What the hell? You can’t die, you witch! You still<br />

have to show me how to do that freaking brioche!”<br />

Mimi had an eclectic group of friends, that was for sure.<br />

By now, the voices behind those messages had learned<br />

of her sudden death and had paid their respects. I began<br />

to hit delete on the messages when the phone rang suddenly<br />

in my hand, making me jump.<br />

The caller ID read EVELYN ROTH. My sigh was probably<br />

audible from the street.<br />

“Hello?” I answered cautiously.<br />

“Audrey?” Evelyn said. “Is that you?”<br />

Controlled sigh. “Yes ma’am. I’m going through Mimi’s<br />

things.”<br />

“Oh Audrey, honey, I know I said it at the funeral, but<br />

your grandmother was the most wonderful person. I just<br />

can’t …” sighing and choked sobs ensued. “Anyway. I<br />

know you have a lot on your plate with the house and all,<br />

but I was wondering, did you know Rosie had a ‘Stitch<br />

and Sip’ planned at her place this Saturday? It was going<br />

to be quite an affair! She’d gotten a caterer in, you know<br />

darling, he used to work for the Bensons back in the day,<br />

and he was creating a menu just for Rosie, and she had<br />

made all these plans and—”<br />

“Mrs. Evelyn!? Sorry to interrupt but, yes ma’am I know<br />

she had that planned, and I have to call the caterer and<br />

cancel, but haven’t gotten to it yet—”<br />

Evelyn interrupted “Oh Audrey, no, dear you can’t just<br />

cancel on Jacque! He is a genius! Rosie had it all planned<br />

and paid for! I know it sounds silly for us to get all gussied<br />

up just to sit around and knit, but your grandmother had<br />

a theme for each one of these events! This month was a<br />

murder mystery! You know, darling, like the old Clue<br />

board game? Like the Agatha Christie books? We were<br />

supposed to swap yarns, have dinner and plan our next<br />

make-a-long!”<br />

“Your what-a-long?” The headache was no longer due<br />

to vodka, but to Mimi’s most trying friend.<br />

“Make-a-long, sweetie!” Evelyn chuckled. “We all agree<br />

on what to knit, a theme, a project, you know, and we knit<br />

the same thing and just chat while we work on it! Rosie<br />

loved to pick projects we’d donate to charity. I mean, one<br />

cold Mardi Gras I saw a stripper wearing a shawl that I'd<br />

SWEAR I’d made!”<br />

Continued on next page...


By Amy From Two Stisters and Some Yarn<br />

For the love of cheese. I was not going to ask where<br />

Evelyn was seeing random strippers wearing hand<br />

knits. “Ahhh okay, Mrs. Evelyn, that’s lovely but I don’t<br />

think there will be a Stitch and Sip, you know, since<br />

Mimi is … gone.”<br />

“Audrey, oh honey, I have the BEST idea! I know you<br />

must go home soon and have so much to do, but why<br />

don’t you let us all come as planned? Jacque is already<br />

scheduled and paid for; we will get all dressed up in<br />

our costumes, and have one last hoorah for Rosie! What<br />

do you say? You won’t have to do a thing! I will be over<br />

early to set up, and Maria still comes weekly, right? Just<br />

make sure she comes Friday, and we will come early<br />

Saturday afternoon to set up so that we can have one<br />

last Stitch and Sip to honor your grandmother! What do<br />

you say?” Evelyn barely breathed as she spit it all out.<br />

I rubbed my temples. “Okay, okay, Mrs. Evelyn. Fine.<br />

Do what you wish. But remember I’m only in town long<br />

enough to finish Mimi’s affairs and turn over the house<br />

to the realtor. This party is all on you.”<br />

Evelyn practically squealed with excitement. “Audrey,<br />

my dear, you won’t regret a thing!” and hung up.<br />

I leaned back in Mimi’s desk chair. Somehow, I<br />

doubted that.<br />

To Be Continued....<br />

READ THE FULL<br />

STORY HERE!<br />

https://www.yumpu.com/en/document/view/68630139/whodoneknit<br />

13


PUZZLE BOX<br />

KNIT QUILT<br />

by Anne Pinkava<br />

YARN<br />

Per individual square you will need approximately 25 yards of Color A, and 20 yards each for Colors B and C.<br />

GAUGE<br />

Because this is a blanket, you can use whatever needle size or yarn you prefer, but I used a US size 3 (3.25mm)<br />

needle and DK weight yarn and got a gauge of 6 sts by 12 rows for 1” square in garter stitch before blocking. After<br />

blocking it was 5 st and 9 rows per 1” square and each of my blocks was 15”.<br />

PATTERN<br />

SQUARE 1:<br />

With A, CO 3.<br />

Set Up Row: K1, yo, k1, sl1.<br />

Row 1: K1, yo, k to 2 before end, k1 tbl, sl1.<br />

Repeat until 25 stitches on needles. Cut A, leaving a tail.<br />

Middle Section:<br />

Set Up Row: With B, k1, yo, k to 2 before end, k1 tbl, sl1.<br />

Repeat row again. (27 sts)<br />

(RS): With C, k1, yo, k1. Picking up B, k 23 sts (2 before end), k1 tbl, sl1. (28 sts)<br />

(WS): With B, k1, yo, k24 to the Intarsia join, put yarn in front to pick up C, k1, k1 tbl, sl1. (29 sts)<br />

1st Repeat for middle:<br />

(RS): With C, k1, yo, k to 1 past join. Pick up B, k23, k1 tbl, sl1 (There will always be 25 st of color B in this section.)<br />

(WS): With B, k1, yo, k24 (to join) put yarn in front to pick up C, k to 2 before end, k1 tbl, sl1.<br />

Repeat until there are 51 st after a WS row: 25 color B, 26 color C.<br />

14


Decrease:<br />

Set Up (RS): With C k27 (to one past join), with B k22 (to 3 before end),<br />

k2tog (Note: on this row only, you may want to slip the first st, twist the<br />

second, and replace both on left needle before working), sl 1.<br />

(WS): With B, k to join. With C, k until 3 before end, k2tog, sl 1.<br />

Decrease Repeat:<br />

(RS): With C, k to 1 past join. With B, k to 3 before end, k2tog, sl 1.<br />

(WS): With B, k to join. With C, k to 3 before end, k2tog, sl 1.<br />

Repeat until there are 29 st on needles, ending on WS.<br />

(RS): With C, k to 1 past join. With B, k2tog, sl 1.<br />

(WS): With color B, k2 (pass join). With C, k to 3 before end, k2tog, sl 1.<br />

Cut B.<br />

(RS): With C, k24, k2tog (over join), sl 1.<br />

(WS): With C, k to 3 before end, k2tog, sl 1. (25 sts). Cut C.<br />

Final Triangle Decrease:<br />

With Color A, k to 3 before end, k2tog, sl 1.<br />

Repeat until 4 sts remain, k1, k2tog, sl 1.<br />

Cut yarn and pull through remaining 3 sts.<br />

SQUARE 2:<br />

If you want to seam your Squares as you go, start square 2 by picking up 25<br />

slipped sts along the right front edge (from the corner where you begin the<br />

decrease down to the first cast on triangle) with your working point pointed<br />

downwards. Cast on your 3 sts on the needle next to the picked up sts, and<br />

work the square as above, but k2tog your last RS stitch with the picked-up<br />

stitch, then turn and k1 normally on the WS. You will have to k3tog with 2 of<br />

the picked up sts once in the first color A segment. Make sure that your<br />

square edges match in pattern as you go, and don’t be afraid to knit more<br />

sts together or invent a st so that they match up. Your last edge st will be<br />

knit in just as it is time for the decrease.<br />

REPEAT WITH SQUARE 3.<br />

SQUARE 4:<br />

Pick up 25 sts along the right front and 25 sts along the other side with your<br />

needles meeting in the center by the cast-on. You may either CO 3, leaving<br />

a tail, or pick up 3, and then work the pattern.<br />

(RS) K2tog with the last stitch and the picked-up stitch at the end of row 1.<br />

Knit the WS in pattern and purl the last stitch together with the picked-up<br />

stitch. Purl that stitch on the RS, and then continue in pattern.<br />

Once you have completed as many squares as you want to complete your<br />

quilt (my squares were 11½” before blocking) weave in your ends and sew<br />

them together. You may want to use a mattress stitch or a crocheted join.<br />

15


INCITEMENT TO KILL<br />

By Uknitted Kingdom<br />

In January I received the following screenshot from Instagram:<br />

The image is of yarn<br />

in the process of<br />

being dyed. The<br />

poster, “Oldrustedchair”<br />

was giving her<br />

followers a “sneak<br />

peek” of a colorway<br />

titled “Rebel Girl.”<br />

By sharing this dye<br />

process, she wanted<br />

to remind everyone<br />

that “abortions are<br />

good, abortions are<br />

healthcare, abortions<br />

should be accessible<br />

to anyone who<br />

wants/needs one.”<br />

She claims that a portion<br />

of her profits<br />

from sales of this colorway<br />

will be donated<br />

to “Abortion Care.”<br />

In closing, she expresses<br />

her excitement<br />

at what she<br />

sees whilst volunteering<br />

as a “clinic escort”<br />

and hints, rather<br />

ominously, “a lot can<br />

happen in 2 minutes.”<br />

Some readers will<br />

take exception to a<br />

man discussing abortion.<br />

“How dare you<br />

[a man] have an opinion<br />

on abortion!”,<br />

“You [men] have no<br />

idea what an unwanted<br />

pregnancy feels like!” “You [men] shouldn’t put a<br />

baby in there if you don’t want it aborted!” “Why aren’t<br />

you adopting unwanted babies then?” “What about<br />

rape?” “What about incest?” “What about congenital defects?”<br />

“What about…?” “What about…?” “What<br />

about…?”<br />

16<br />

The obvious misandry notwithstanding, all humans are<br />

entitled to hold and share opinions on any subject.<br />

Why write about this in a knitting/crochet magazine?<br />

Several yarn dyers, designers, and known crafters, “Oldrustedchair,”<br />

“Gary_Knits_Gary_Rides,” and Hunter Hammerson<br />

to name a few, are promoting abortion as if it is a<br />

fun activity to engage in on a rainy Tuesday afternoon.<br />

There is a glee, an excitement,<br />

an arousal almost, in their eyes<br />

and demeanor when they advocate<br />

for the execution of the unborn.<br />

It is not just opinion, but<br />

dogma feeding something sinister<br />

within them. Uninvited, contentious<br />

assertions require<br />

uninvited responses. This is<br />

mine.<br />

There are a myriad of reasons a<br />

pregnant woman may seek an<br />

abortion; age, financial status,<br />

relationship status, some health<br />

conditions, some psychological<br />

conditions, and some purely selfish<br />

and reckless reasons. The<br />

most often heard excuse for killing<br />

a baby is: “My body, my<br />

choice.”<br />

The fetus is only the mother’s<br />

body in terms of DNA, 50 percent<br />

of which comes from the<br />

father. If the fetus is the mother’s body, it is only partly<br />

hers, and equally that of the father’s. However, from conception,<br />

the fetus possesses his or her own body in various<br />

stages of human development. In cold and<br />

unemotional terms, the mother is simply an incubator to<br />

feed and breathe for the baby until his or her body can<br />

perform these functions independently. Every human possesses<br />

the right to bodily autonomy until that body has a<br />

life or death impact on another human body. For example,<br />

I have full autonomy of my body. If I chose to use my<br />

body to end a woman’s pregnancy, or end the life of any<br />

other human, I would rightly be guilty of murder. For<br />

some skewed rationale, in many countries, a mother can<br />

legally have her unborn baby torn limb from limb simply<br />

by reason of it being unwanted. If an abortionist did the<br />

same to a lovingly anticipated unborn baby, s/he would<br />

be guilty of murder. It all boils down to one simple ques-<br />

Continued on next page...


Incitement Continued...<br />

By Uknitted Kingdom<br />

tion. Yes or No? Is this human life wanted by his/her<br />

mother? If it isn’t morally acceptable to tear a baby to<br />

pieces once born, and visible, why is it morally acceptable<br />

whilst the baby is unborn and unable to be seen?<br />

There is an argument for abortion if the unborn child is<br />

going to kill the mother as a physical consequence of the<br />

pregnancy. However, the same cannot be said of psychological<br />

or suicidal consequences of a pregnancy.<br />

Rape and incest are always used as an argument to<br />

keep abortions readily available. However, these types of<br />

pregnancies are so rare as to be statistically inconsequential.<br />

As traumatic and psychologically damaging<br />

as these pregnancies might be, they should not be included<br />

when arguing about the general rights and<br />

wrongs of abortion. These cases should be carefully considered<br />

on an individual basis, with full medical, psychological,<br />

and legal support. These pregnancies result from<br />

criminal acts and therefore lie outside the parameters of<br />

typical abortion discourse. However, it must always be remembered<br />

that an unborn baby is never guilty of rape or<br />

incest. Why should an innocent be executed for his or<br />

her father’s crime? Will a second trauma negate the first?<br />

The vast majority of abortions occur simply as “backdated”<br />

contraception.<br />

The following data from the Guttmacher Institute is an<br />

indication of the reasons women have offered for aborting<br />

their unborn babies. Please note that each woman interviewed<br />

was allowed to give multiple answers, so the<br />

totals do not add up to 100%.<br />

Only 26.5 percent could be considered genuine cases<br />

for discussing the option of abortion (rape, incest, health<br />

of fetus, and health of mother). This isn’t to say abortions<br />

should be performed in these cases, just that the situations<br />

are complex enough to invite medical, psychological<br />

and legal discussion.<br />

If we only look at the elective reasons, the vast majority<br />

of all of the USA’s abortions in the years indicated had no<br />

justifiable motive, and were simply performed as a form<br />

of post conception "contraceptive."<br />

It shouldn’t be a mystery to any adult that heterosexual<br />

intercourse can result in pregnancy. Many forms of contraception<br />

are available. Yes, some are more effective<br />

than others. Some are more available than others. Yes,<br />

more help needs to be provided to pre-emptively prevent<br />

pregnancies for those who don’t want them. Research<br />

into foolproof contraception is needed. The<br />

argument that “X contraception is only N percent effective<br />

therefore what’s the point of using it” does not compute.<br />

Any percentage of unwanted pregnancy<br />

prevention is better than none at all!<br />

Regardless of the unfairness of the situation, the<br />

mother always bears the ultimate responsibility of carrying<br />

the baby, feeding the baby, and raising the baby to<br />

adulthood. Fathers vary enormously in terms of which<br />

will support, protect, and raise his child(ren). Nothing will<br />

ever change this. We can argue, cajole, incentivize,<br />

threaten, but there will always be some men who won’t<br />

stand by the mother and/or his child. This is an unpleasant<br />

and inconvenient truth which all females need to be<br />

aware of. If you are the only one who is going to be left<br />

with the consequences of a pregnancy, then you alone<br />

need to take responsibility for becoming pregnant. This<br />

isn’t being cruel or dismissive but is cold, hard, truth.<br />

Prior to the 21st century it could be argued that some<br />

women were naïve and fell pregnant through coercion,<br />

ignorance, or poor availability of contraception. This is<br />

no longer the case. Sexual information is readily available.<br />

However, what is also now widespread is a sense of<br />

entitlement, selfishness, and a throwaway attitude towards<br />

everything, including sex and children.<br />

In modern society, abstinence, marriage, and even monogamy<br />

are old fashioned concepts. Consenting adults<br />

are free to do whatever legal sexual activities they<br />

choose in private. However, consenting adults, male and<br />

female, need to take responsibility for the bodily autonomy<br />

they take for granted. If either of you don’t want a<br />

* https://www.guttmacher.org/journals/psrh/2005/reasons-us-women-have-abortions-quantitative-and-qualitative-perspectives<br />

Continued on next page...<br />

17


Incitement Continued...<br />

By Uknitted Kingdom<br />

pregnancy make damn sure you do not cause one. If you<br />

do become pregnant, summary execution of your baby is<br />

not a logical or justifiable conclusion for your lack of responsibility.<br />

Contrary to how it may appear, I do have some sympathy<br />

for those who have been reckless or naïve and found<br />

themselves with an unwanted pregnancy. Your life is inevitably<br />

going to be different than the life you may have<br />

planned. You might no longer be traveling the world, or<br />

studying to be a brain surgeon, but that isn’t because of<br />

your baby, it’s because of the choices you made when<br />

choosing a sexual partner, and gambling your future personal<br />

plans on a game of sexual roulette.<br />

For those who have had abortions, nothing will change<br />

that event and any debate about it is only looking at the<br />

broken gate after the horse has bolted.<br />

Returning to the fiber world. Those like “Oldrustedchair,”<br />

“Gary_Knits_Gary_Rides,” and Hunter Hammerson<br />

(just a few of many) are, in effect, inciting mothers to kill.<br />

If you wish to reply to this article (for publication) please<br />

send your comments to: blockedmagazine@gmail.com<br />

18


By Micah-in-Stitches<br />

Potential Child<br />

I will never forget the day I told my boyfriend we were<br />

expecting. I was happy because I knew I was finally going<br />

to be a mother but I knew that he would not share my joy<br />

in the life we had created together. We had had the conversation<br />

about being parents and it had almost ended<br />

our relationship months before. It was a dream for me and<br />

a nightmare for him. He was close to 40 and I was in my<br />

mid 30’s. We had talked about it and we both knew how<br />

the other felt. We were both old enough to know the potential<br />

results of having unprotected sex and accepted the<br />

consequences.<br />

My boyfriend had decided that it was worth the risk to<br />

him because he had never gotten anyone else pregnant so<br />

in his head, he was probably not able to and he knew I was<br />

in my mid 30’s so if I hadn’t gotten pregnant I was probably<br />

not able to either. I was honest with him about the facts of<br />

my situation:<br />

1. I had very few sexual partners before him (only 2<br />

others).<br />

2. I had never had unprotected sex with anyone before.<br />

3. I had aways wanted to have children.<br />

We had also talked about abortion. I told him that I was<br />

pro-choice. I am pro-choice. But it was a choice I would<br />

never make. I have supported friends both male and female<br />

over the years in relationships who found themselves<br />

making the difficult decision to end a pregnancy and in all<br />

of those instances it also ended the relationships that resulted<br />

in the pregnancy. I have also supported friends who<br />

have chosen not to end an unplanned pregnancy. Sometimes<br />

the relationships survived and sometimes they didn’t<br />

but however things resolved was for the best.<br />

To my boyfriend things in life were black and white:<br />

1. If you supported the right to choose you must be willing<br />

to decide that having an abortion was an option.<br />

2. We would stay together even if I ended the pregnancy<br />

because we loved each other.<br />

3. Me not having an abortion wasn’t fair to him because<br />

it took away his right to choose.<br />

Nothing about abortion is black and white. I was an adult<br />

in my 30’s with a good job. I knew that if he decided that<br />

he was going to leave and not be a father to our child I<br />

would be okay—I had accepted this and knew it was a<br />

possibility. This is the choice I made when I had unprotected<br />

sex. My boyfriend had played the odds that because<br />

of my age and his that unprotected sex wasn’t likely<br />

to result in a pregnancy, and if it did, I would have an abortion<br />

because I believed in a woman’s right to choose. He<br />

wanted to know why he didn’t get a say in the pregnancy.<br />

He didn’t like my answer: “You did choose. You chose to<br />

have unprotected sex knowing that I have always wanted<br />

to be a mother. Your choice now is are you going to be a<br />

father or are you going to walk away and leave me to raise<br />

our baby on my own?” If I had an abortion, our relationship<br />

was over so he needed to make the decision if he was<br />

in or out because I wasn’t having one. I was having a baby.<br />

To me:<br />

1. Abortion is not the same thing as birth control.<br />

2. Abortion is the hardest decision that a woman ever<br />

has to make and it is an extremely difficult decision.<br />

3. IF a woman uses abortion as birth control or makes the<br />

decision to end her pregnancy easily than it is probably<br />

the best decision for the potential child.<br />

4. I would support anyone who told me that they were<br />

making that decision no matter what their reason was. I will<br />

not judge a person for making such a difficult decision.<br />

I will always make a blanket or a garment for a baby who<br />

is coming into this world. I will always support a person<br />

who loses a baby through choice or through fate. I will<br />

never judge someone making a choice I could not make<br />

myself. I may wish from time to time that I didn’t marry my<br />

husband but I have never wished that I didn’t give birth to<br />

my children. I will never think that my decision is the right<br />

decision for someone else.<br />

19


MURDERKNITS<br />

Liz Clothier Designs<br />

COWL<br />

Murder, Mystery and Mayhem are happening<br />

in the New Orleans knitting community.<br />

Join in and use the clues to figure out WhoDoneKnit.<br />

GAUGE<br />

24 sts by 28 rows = 4” x 4”/10 cm x10cm. In Stockinette<br />

SIZE<br />

8.5”/22 cm from top to bottom and 10”/25.5 cm wide lying flat<br />

YARN<br />

Mystery Mouse Yarns DK (246 yd/225 m 3.5 oz/100 g)<br />

WhoDoneKnit ~70 grams<br />

NEEDLES<br />

US 4 (3.5mm) 16-inch circular or dpns.<br />

(Or size needed to get gauge)<br />

MATERIALS<br />

Tapestry needle<br />

Stitch markers<br />

Scissors<br />

PATTERN<br />

Cast on 128 stitches and join in the round,<br />

placing marker for beginning of the round.<br />

K1, p1 around for 1.25”.<br />

Set up rows:<br />

K32 stitches, place marker, repeat around.<br />

There will be 4 sections.<br />

On next round you will start the cable sections.<br />

K4, work round 1 of chart, k4, slip marker, repeat around.<br />

Continue knitting around and complete chart rounds 1-28 once<br />

then repeat rounds 1-14 one more time.<br />

Knit one round.<br />

K1, p1 around for 1.25”.<br />

Bind off loosely, weave in ends, and block.<br />

20


Murderous knits from the archive<br />

SOLDIER ACCUSED OF WIFE MURDER SHOT<br />

KNITTING PULLOVER – ALLEGED STATEMENT<br />

The trial was continued at the Old<br />

Bailey today of Nathaniel Joseph Barnett,<br />

25, a soldier who has pleaded<br />

not guilty to the murder of his wife,<br />

Adelaide Doreen Barnett, at Stanger-<br />

Road, South Norwood, London.<br />

It is alleged by the prosecution that<br />

Barnett, coming home on leave, shot<br />

her with a service rifle.<br />

Today Police-Constable Temple said<br />

that Barnett came to him in the street<br />

and said, I want to use a telephone<br />

and call an ambulance, I have shot<br />

my wife.”<br />

Later they went to Stanger-Road,<br />

where he saw the body of Mrs. Barnett<br />

on bed. Barnett remarked: I was<br />

cleaning my rifle, and it accidentally<br />

went off.<br />

Police-Sergeant Hibberd said that<br />

Barnett took him into a back room<br />

and said: I don’t know. I am sorry<br />

now.” Barnett took two pieces of<br />

paper from his pocket and gave them<br />

to him, saying, I have known you for<br />

a long time, sergeant. Please take<br />

these and keep them.”<br />

One of the notes, addressed to<br />

“Dear Arthur,” was in Mrs. Barnett’s<br />

handwriting. The other was signed<br />

by a man.<br />

Sitting on bed.<br />

Inspector Wright said that Barnett<br />

made a statement in which he described<br />

how he was handed two<br />

letters and then decided to see his<br />

wife with a view to getting evidence<br />

for a divorce. Referring to the shooting<br />

the alleged statement went on,<br />

“She was sitting on the bed knitting a<br />

pullover for a man named George, a<br />

married man with two children. I felt<br />

riled to think she should knit this for<br />

a civilian and a married man. I would<br />

not have minded had it been for a<br />

soldier. I suddenly picked up my rifle<br />

from across my knees. The barrel was<br />

pointing towards her head and I suddenly<br />

pulled the trigger. I really<br />

wanted to scare her.”<br />

Mr. Eric Neve, K.C. (for the defence):<br />

His wife was no good to him?<br />

– Inspector Wright; None at all. [Sic]<br />

The inspector said that in the room<br />

at Stanger-Road was found a number<br />

of letters from men, and also a list of<br />

men’s names. While Barnett and his<br />

wife were together there was no<br />

doubt she did him incalculable harm.<br />

Since joining the Army he had become<br />

a 100 per cent man.<br />

This concluded the evidence for the<br />

prosecution, and Barnett went into<br />

the witness-box.<br />

Barnett said that he had overstayed<br />

his leave by five days on the day of<br />

the shooting. He and his wife were<br />

sitting on the bed. She was knitting a<br />

pullover and she held it up saying,<br />

“This will fit him.” He knew to<br />

whom his wife was referring. At the<br />

time he was cleaning his rifle.<br />

Mr. Neve: Did you intend to use the<br />

rifle against your wife – No.<br />

“TO SCARE HER”<br />

Questioned by Mr. G. B. McClure<br />

(prosecuting) as to why he put the<br />

round in the rifle Barnett said, I really<br />

wanted to scare her.”<br />

Mr. McClure: And the way you<br />

wanted to scare her was to fire it in<br />

her presence, if not at her? – No. I<br />

really did not want to fire it.<br />

Barnett said that he did not show<br />

the round to his wife. He forgot that<br />

it was in the rifle when he was cleaning<br />

it.<br />

Barnett was handed a rifle and<br />

asked to demonstrate how he was<br />

cleaning it. He pulled a handkerchief<br />

several times through the trigger<br />

guard.<br />

He was asked to fire the rifle and,<br />

pointing it towards the ceiling, he<br />

pulled the trigger.<br />

Barnett said, he did not ‘deliberately<br />

pull the trigger with the intention<br />

of firing the gun’.<br />

Liverpool Evening Express<br />

- Tuesday 23 September 1941<br />

KNITTING NEEDLE IN<br />

HEART MAN UNCHANGED<br />

Anthony Regan, sentenced to life imprisonment at the Old<br />

Bailey in September for stabbing his wife to death, was today<br />

still in the sick bay at Wandsworth Prison, London, where he<br />

was taken yesterday after being found with a knitting needle<br />

sticking in his heart. No change in his condition was reported<br />

today.<br />

Edinburgh Evening News<br />

- Saturday 03 November 1962<br />

21


Murderous knits from the archive<br />

NEW JUDGE KNITS HIS SOCKS<br />

Mr. Roland Giffard Oliver, K.C., and<br />

Mr. Reginald Powell Croom-Johnson,<br />

K.C. M.P., have been appointed Justices<br />

of the High Court of Justice,<br />

King's Bench Division. Viscount Finlay,<br />

Sir Arthur F. C. C. Luxmoor. and<br />

Sir Rayner Goddard are to be new<br />

Lords Mr. Roland Justices of Appeal.<br />

All are paid £5,000 a year.<br />

Sir Arthur Luxmoore has been a<br />

Judge of the Chancery Division, High<br />

Court, since 1929. He was born in<br />

1876. He is an old Rugby football Blue<br />

and international who played for England<br />

in the 'nineties. He has the reputation<br />

of knitting his own socks.<br />

Mr. Oliver. who is fifty-four, prosecuted<br />

in the Thompson-Bywaters<br />

murder case, the Harris “fireraising”<br />

trial, and the trial of Captain Miles,<br />

Chief of the London Salvage Corps.<br />

He appeared for the Bishop of Norwich<br />

in the case of the Rector of Stiffkey.<br />

He was a member of the Budget<br />

Secrets tribunal. In July he appeared<br />

for Mr. Aleck Bourne, the Wimpole<br />

Street surgeon.<br />

Mr. Croom-Johnson, who is fiftynine,<br />

has represented the Bridgwater<br />

Division of Somerset as a Conservative<br />

M.P. since 1929.<br />

Sir Rayner Goddard was made a<br />

High Court Judge in March 1932. He<br />

is sixty-one. Since then he has been in<br />

a number of sensational murder trials.<br />

Viscount Finlay is sixty-three. He<br />

sentenced the Dartmoor mutineers<br />

and has sat at many murder trials.<br />

The appointment of Mr. Croom-<br />

Johnson will cause a by-election at<br />

Bridgwater. At the General Election in<br />

1935 he had a majority of 19,567.<br />

Daily Mirror<br />

- Tuesday 11 October 1938<br />

SHE KEPT ON KNITTING<br />

– NEW JERSEY WOMAN<br />

FOILS ARMED BANDITS<br />

Camden. New Jersey (Reuter). By<br />

calmly going on knitting when three<br />

masked and armed bandits shouted<br />

“Hands up!” a woman here has saved<br />

£14 cash and a £7O diamond ring.<br />

She is Mrs Mary Glowscki, the wife<br />

of a local baker. She was sitting in the<br />

bakery when the attack was made,<br />

with the cash and the ring on her lap.<br />

Her husband was checking the week's<br />

receipts.<br />

“I’ll shoot,” announced one of the<br />

robbers.<br />

“Then you'll be charged with murder<br />

as well as robbery” she calmly replied.<br />

Another of the men then suggested<br />

that a hasty retreat was preferable to<br />

arguing with a woman who went on<br />

knitting in the face of a hold-up – so<br />

they all fled. After they had gone Mrs.<br />

Glowscki fainted.<br />

Hartlepool Northern Daily Mail<br />

- Friday 25 January 1935<br />

22


GAUGE FREE<br />

Morticia Shawl<br />

Any needle size<br />

Any yarn weight<br />

Knit to desired size<br />

by Murder Knits<br />

PATTERN<br />

Cast on 3 sts<br />

Row 1: Knit<br />

Row 2: K1, m1 (use preferred increase, yarn over<br />

or make 1 left/right) k to last stitch, sl1<br />

Row 3: K to last st, sl1<br />

Repeat rows 2-3 until desired size.<br />

Cast off, weave in ends, and block as needed.<br />

Sample is knit with dk weight yarn, using 200 grams<br />

in total on size US 7 (4.5 mm) needles.<br />

23


Kniing Podcasts!<br />

https://www.youtube.com/@TwoSistersAndSomeYarn<br />

https://www.youtube.com/@knitnite/featured<br />

https://www.youtube.com/@politicallyincorrectknitters<br />

https://www.youtube.com/@murderknits2364/videos<br />

SUBSCRIBE TO OUR<br />

CHANNEL!<br />

https://youtube.com/@blockedmagazine2859?si=-0u_JNUgDq7SHVcE<br />

24


By Mommy Dreary<br />

Mrs. Peacock in the<br />

kitchen with the…<br />

I recently had the pleasure to test knit the “Weapon<br />

of Choice” cowl by Neil James (appearing in this issue<br />

on page 26). While the pattern is lovely as written, I<br />

really wanted to add more color to the playing pieces.<br />

I initially thought I would duplicate stitch the player<br />

pieces in their respective colors, but after seeing a<br />

couple of different mentions of using Sharpies on<br />

wool, I did a little research on the technique.<br />

There are a lot of tutorials and blog posts about<br />

using Sharpies/markers to dye wool. In most of these<br />

tutorials, the markers are used on sock blanks or involve<br />

creating a dye from the marker felt. I did not see<br />

much information about using Sharpies for color detail<br />

but decided to give it a try anyway.<br />

As anyone who has played with dye will tell you,<br />

dye runs, so it is very difficult to maintain a precise border<br />

when dyeing textiles. Having tie-dyed t-shirts, I<br />

knew that it would be a big risk in attempting to dye<br />

small sections of my finished project. However, because<br />

my background color was dark, I figured that,<br />

worst-case scenario, I would have to duplicate stitch<br />

the players as I had initially planned.<br />

While I can’t guarantee your outcomes, here is<br />

what I did:<br />

First, I put a barrier between the front and back of<br />

my project to keep the color from bleeding through<br />

the fabric.<br />

I colored the specified section with the permanent<br />

marker. The color does fade a bit, so be prepared to<br />

really go over the working area with the marker. For<br />

this project, I recommend doing one player at a time<br />

or skipping a couple of players.<br />

Next, I carefully spritzed the colored area with 91%<br />

rubbing alcohol (you could also use an eye dropper).<br />

Sharpie?<br />

You want to take care that you are using enough alcohol<br />

to allow the color to sink into the wool, but you do<br />

not want to saturate the whole piece because the<br />

color will follow the alcohol.<br />

I used cotton swabs to dab the area around the<br />

dyed sections and to absorb any excess liquid/color.<br />

Do not smash down the dyed area because you will<br />

push the dye outward.<br />

If I needed to add color after the alcohol solution, I<br />

went back over the area with the marker and then<br />

dabbed with an alcohol-moistened cotton swab.<br />

Once you are happy with your color, let the piece<br />

dry and then set the color with an iron on the highest<br />

heat setting for three to four minutes. Heat setting is<br />

the KEY to color fastness. Because your wool hasn’t<br />

been soaked in a solution before dyeing, it will not be<br />

colorfast without heat setting. You will lose some color<br />

when washing, so I recommend having a color catcher<br />

in the wash tub.<br />

*IMPORTANT: I colored 100% Superwash wool. I<br />

am not sure how well this technique works on other<br />

fibers/blends.<br />

Knitting Patterns<br />

https://www.ravelry.com/designers/liz-clothier<br />

Anne Pinkava<br />

Knitting Patterns<br />

www.lovecrafts.com/en-us/user/maker/fdba7e1e-93b6-4b6f-9f82-06ef18d0ec8c<br />

Knitting Patterns<br />

https://galilee-life.com/vendor/deplorable-knitter/<br />

25


WEAPON OF<br />

CHOICE OR<br />

CLUE(DO)<br />

COWL<br />

by Uknitted Kingdom<br />

DK (marker-colored player) Version at right:<br />

YARN:<br />

Dark Brown (MC) – Willow Yarns Daily DK Yarn<br />

(3.5 oz/100g 284 yd/260m, 100% Superwash wool)<br />

1 skein Dark Chocolate<br />

Gold – Yarn Bee Must Be Merino ({Discontinued}<br />

3.5 oz/100 g, 227 yards/208 m 50% Merino Wool/25%<br />

Acrylic/25% Nylon) 1 skein Gold<br />

White - Yorkie Yarns Simply B DK<br />

(3.5 oz/100 g, 245 yds/224m 75% Superwash Merino/25%<br />

Nylon) 1 skein Hint<br />

Red, Green, Blue, Purple, and Yellow various DK from stash.<br />

NEEDLES:<br />

US Size 6 (4.0mm) 32” circular needles<br />

US Size 7 (4.5mm) 32” circular needles<br />

GAUGE:<br />

25 sts x 27 rnds = 4” x 4”<br />

FINISHED SIZE:<br />

30” around by 18” tall<br />

Fingering (Blue Player) Version<br />

YARN:<br />

Unknown fingering-weight yarns from stash using the following approximate amounts:<br />

Black (MC) – 175 g<br />

Blue – 20 g<br />

Red – 10 g<br />

Yellow – 20 g<br />

Green – 20 g<br />

White – 20 g<br />

Purple – 15 g<br />

NEEDLES:<br />

US Size 2 (2.75 mm) 24” circular needle<br />

US Size 3 (3.25 mm) 24” circular needle<br />

Gauge:<br />

30 sts x 30 rnds = 4” x 4”<br />

Finished Size:<br />

29” around by 15.5” tall<br />

26


DIRECTIONS:<br />

Using MC and smaller needles, CO 216 stitches.<br />

Follow Chart 1 (Bottom Rib), repeat 54 times around.<br />

Switch to larger needles and follow Chart 2 (Break),<br />

repeat 72 times around.<br />

Follow Chart 3 (Dice), repeat 4 times around.<br />

Follow Chart 2 (Break), repeat 72 times around.<br />

Follow Chart 4 (Player), repeat 24 times around. (For easy<br />

muti-colored player pieces, see page 25 for tutorial.<br />

Chart 2 (Break)<br />

Follow Chart 2 (Break), repeat 72 times around.<br />

Follow Chart 5 (Weapons), repeat 4 times around.<br />

Follow Chart 2 (Break), repeat 72 times around.<br />

Chart 1<br />

(Bottom Ribbing)<br />

Chart 6<br />

(Top Ribbing)<br />

Switch to smaller needles and follow Chart 6 (Top Rib),<br />

repeat 54 times around.<br />

Bind off loosely.<br />

Chart 4 (Player)<br />

Chart 3 (Dice)<br />

Chart 5 (Weapons)<br />

27


28


29<br />

108<br />

108<br />

107<br />

107<br />

106<br />

106<br />

105<br />

105<br />

104<br />

104<br />

103<br />

103<br />

102<br />

102<br />

101<br />

101<br />

100<br />

100<br />

99<br />

99<br />

98<br />

98<br />

97<br />

97<br />

96<br />

96<br />

95<br />

95<br />

94<br />

94<br />

93<br />

93<br />

92<br />

92<br />

91<br />

91<br />

90<br />

90<br />

89<br />

89<br />

88<br />

88<br />

87<br />

87<br />

86<br />

86<br />

85<br />

85<br />

84<br />

84<br />

83<br />

83<br />

82<br />

82<br />

81<br />

81<br />

80<br />

80<br />

79<br />

79<br />

78<br />

78<br />

77<br />

77<br />

76<br />

76<br />

75<br />

75<br />

74<br />

74<br />

73<br />

73<br />

72<br />

72<br />

71<br />

71<br />

70<br />

70<br />

69<br />

69<br />

68<br />

68<br />

67<br />

67<br />

66<br />

66<br />

65<br />

65<br />

64<br />

64<br />

63<br />

63<br />

62<br />

62<br />

61<br />

61<br />

60<br />

60<br />

59<br />

59<br />

58<br />

58<br />

57<br />

57<br />

56<br />

56<br />

55<br />

55<br />

54<br />

54<br />

53<br />

53<br />

52<br />

52<br />

51<br />

51<br />

50<br />

50<br />

49<br />

49<br />

48<br />

48<br />

47<br />

47<br />

46<br />

46<br />

45<br />

45<br />

44<br />

44<br />

43<br />

43<br />

42<br />

42<br />

41<br />

41<br />

40<br />

40<br />

39<br />

39<br />

38<br />

38<br />

37<br />

37<br />

36<br />

36<br />

35<br />

35<br />

34<br />

34<br />

33<br />

33<br />

32<br />

32<br />

31<br />

31<br />

30<br />

30<br />

29<br />

29<br />

28<br />

28<br />

27<br />

27<br />

26<br />

26<br />

25<br />

25<br />

24<br />

24<br />

23<br />

23<br />

22<br />

22<br />

21<br />

21<br />

20<br />

20<br />

19<br />

19<br />

18<br />

18<br />

17<br />

17<br />

16<br />

16<br />

15<br />

15<br />

14<br />

14<br />

13<br />

13<br />

12<br />

12<br />

11<br />

11<br />

10<br />

10<br />

9<br />

9<br />

8<br />

8<br />

7<br />

7<br />

6<br />

6<br />

5<br />

5<br />

4<br />

4<br />

3<br />

3<br />

2<br />

2<br />

1<br />

1<br />

128<br />

127<br />

126<br />

125<br />

124<br />

123<br />

122<br />

121<br />

120<br />

119<br />

118<br />

117<br />

116<br />

115<br />

114<br />

113<br />

112<br />

111<br />

110<br />

109<br />

108<br />

107<br />

106<br />

105<br />

104<br />

103<br />

102<br />

101<br />

100<br />

99<br />

98<br />

97<br />

96<br />

95<br />

94<br />

93<br />

92<br />

91<br />

90<br />

89<br />

88<br />

87<br />

86<br />

85<br />

84<br />

83<br />

82<br />

81<br />

80<br />

79<br />

78<br />

77<br />

76<br />

75<br />

74<br />

73<br />

72<br />

71<br />

70<br />

69<br />

68<br />

67<br />

66<br />

65<br />

64<br />

63<br />

62<br />

61<br />

60<br />

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58<br />

57<br />

56<br />

55<br />

54<br />

53<br />

52<br />

51<br />

50<br />

49<br />

48<br />

47<br />

46<br />

45<br />

44<br />

43<br />

42<br />

41<br />

40<br />

39<br />

38<br />

37<br />

36<br />

35<br />

34<br />

33<br />

32<br />

31<br />

30<br />

29<br />

28<br />

27<br />

26<br />

25<br />

24<br />

23<br />

22<br />

21<br />

20<br />

19<br />

18<br />

17<br />

16<br />

15<br />

14<br />

13<br />

12<br />

11<br />

10<br />

9<br />

8<br />

7<br />

6<br />

5<br />

4<br />

3<br />

2<br />

1<br />

FULL CHART


Murder Mystery<br />

CROSSWORD<br />

DOWN:<br />

1. A greenhouse, usually attached to a dwelling,<br />

for growing and displaying plants.<br />

2. The original name for the game Clue.<br />

4. Dame Agatha Mary Clarissa ________,<br />

Lady Mallowan<br />

5. A room in which meals are eaten, especially<br />

the room in which the major or more formal<br />

meals are eaten.<br />

7. The large entrance room of a house or<br />

building.<br />

9. A room for sitting, waiting, relaxing, etc.<br />

10. Hidden routes used for stealthy travel,<br />

escape, or movement of people and<br />

goods, sometimes taking you to another<br />

place more quickly than the obvious route.<br />

13. A group of yarns, plies, fibers, or strands<br />

that are twisted or braided together into<br />

a larger and stronger form.<br />

14. A room under the ground floor of a<br />

building, usually used for storing things.<br />

17. A metal tool with a shaped end, used to<br />

turn nuts and bolts in the UK.<br />

18. A short, swordlike weapon with a pointed<br />

blade and a handle, used for stabbing.<br />

20. Anything that serves to guide or direct<br />

in the solution of a mystery.<br />

21. To arrive at a conclusion by conjecture,<br />

chance, or intuition.<br />

23. A room or place equipped for cooking.<br />

24. A hollow cylinder used for the conveyance<br />

of water, gas, steam, petroleum, etc. within<br />

a home or business, made of a soft, silvery<br />

white or greyish metal, which is poisonous<br />

to humans in large quantities.<br />

27. A device having a socket or a spike for<br />

holding a candle.<br />

28. The housekeeper (maid).<br />

ACROSS:<br />

3. The femme fatale.<br />

6. A room in a house, club, etc., where<br />

billiards is played.<br />

8. The military officer who retired after a<br />

distinguished career.<br />

11. A handgun with a revolving chambered<br />

cylinder for holding several cartridges,<br />

which may be discharged in succession<br />

without reloading.<br />

12. A room or rooms set apart to contain<br />

books and other material for reading,<br />

viewing, listening, study, or reference.<br />

15. The absent-minded academic.<br />

16. A room, especially in a house, used for<br />

quiet work such as reading or writing.<br />

19. Number 17 down, but in the USA.<br />

22. The unlawful killing of a human being<br />

without malice aforethought.<br />

25. A large room with a polished floor for<br />

dancing.<br />

26. When the killer is a woman.<br />

28. The widowed socialite.<br />

29. The local clergyman.<br />

30


31


y D. Marie Prokop<br />

Reclaim<br />

Nellie Blue turned to her handsome beau in the<br />

driver’s seat, and said “Ted Tickerson, where are you<br />

taking us? At least give us a hint.”<br />

The remainder of the Miss Marple Knitting Club reiterated<br />

her plea from the backseat. Nellie’s two best<br />

friends had agreed to accompany them on this mystery<br />

quest. Beth and Charlie (short for Charlotte) were<br />

good sports – when they weren’t fighting with each<br />

other, that is.<br />

Ted winked in the rearview mirror. “You’ll have to<br />

wait and see.”<br />

They moaned, then grabbed their knitting bags.<br />

Beth asked, “How long will it take to get there? I’m on<br />

the mindless knitting portion of this sock now, but if I<br />

get to the heel, I’m going to need help. Oh, I forgot to<br />

bring snacks. And – ”<br />

“Hey, Ted! Where’s your phone?” Nellie interrupted.<br />

“How do you know where to go?”<br />

He smirked. “Don’t worry, I won’t get lost. It’s an<br />

easy drive. You have approximately an hour to kill,<br />

Beth.”<br />

“Oh, you won’t get to the heel in an hour,” Charlie<br />

snickered. “You’re the slowest knitter ever, Beth.” She<br />

pulled out a fluorescent green and black skull and<br />

crossbones colorwork project from a bag with the<br />

words “Feeling Stabby” emblazoned on the side. Charlie<br />

had taught them all how to knit. Nellie had caught<br />

on fast, but Beth was a slower learner.<br />

“Aren’t you all sweetness and sunshine today?,”<br />

Beth scowled. Charlie stuck out her pierced tongue<br />

and knitted, the quick metal needles flashing in the<br />

noontime sun. Beth and Charlie were light and dark,<br />

north and south. Beth’s family had fostered Charlie for<br />

two years now. She had been a ward of the state since<br />

she was two-years-old. Her grievances were valid,<br />

though misplaced. Nellie sighed, remembering how<br />

angsty Charlie had been before Beth’s mother had<br />

taught her to knit. She was much nicer now.<br />

Nellie gave Beth some encouragement. “You’re<br />

doing great. You’re already knitting socks. That’s a serious<br />

challenge. Turning a heel is so satisfying – like figuring<br />

out who the criminal is before the big reveal.”<br />

“Well, I haven’t finished one yet,” she responded.<br />

Charlie was right. Beth didn’t reach the heel before<br />

Ted exited the freeway. The next road was unfamiliar.<br />

He slowed as they passed a sign welcoming them to<br />

The Village of St. Anthony, population 240. Large, twostory<br />

houses with wrap-around porches and balconies<br />

lined the main street. Ahead, a sign beside a large<br />

mailbox in front of a Tudor-style home read “Estate<br />

Sale 1-3 pm Saturday.” Ted parked on the street half a<br />

block away.<br />

“What’s an estate sale?,” Beth asked.<br />

“It’s a garage sale for rich jerks,” Charlie answered.<br />

They exited the car. Across the street, an old, cherryred<br />

convertible caught Nellie’s eye. A woman sat behind<br />

the wheel and wiped tears from her eyes while<br />

her shoulders shook. It hurt to watch her, so Nellie<br />

looked away. By the time curiosity tempted her to<br />

glance back, the woman had disappeared.<br />

The knitting club wandered the lawn through a<br />

maze of furniture, card tables, and boxes overflowing<br />

with everything from ugly curtains to antique spoons.<br />

“Why did you bring us here, Ted? Hoping to add to<br />

your record collection? You know you were born in the<br />

wrong century, right?” Charlie rock ’n’ rolled her dark,<br />

kohl black-lined eyes.<br />

Ted collected classic vinyl records of various genres.<br />

Presently he was obsessed with the Ramones, a<br />

punk-rock band from the 1970s, so her jab was legitimate.<br />

“Maybe I just want to have something to do. Who<br />

knows what hidden gems we could find here? I still<br />

need to reclaim a sweater, like Beth suggested at last<br />

month’s meeting. Remember? To recycle the wool?”<br />

Nellie stopped in her tracks. “Wait a second – that<br />

name on the mailbox sounds familiar. Bennie Brown.<br />

Where have I heard that name before?”<br />

Beth adjusted her slouchy pink hat. “Bennie<br />

Brown… didn’t he have a podcast or something?”<br />

Nellie’s eyes lit up. “That’s right! He’s a knitting designer.<br />

What was his podcast called?”<br />

Continued on next page...<br />

32


Reclaim Continued...<br />

“The Corner Market Cousins.” Charlie tugged at<br />

her gray, cabled fingerless mitts. “It was super corny,<br />

but Bennie Brown was brilliant. This is one of his designs.<br />

His cousin wasn’t even a knitter. Whatever happened<br />

to them? Probably offended someone<br />

powerful, huh?”<br />

Beth shrugged. “They just disappeared.”<br />

Ted’s mouth curled up on the sides. “Bennie<br />

didn’t just disappear. He died last week.”<br />

Nellie twirled a blonde lock. “He wasn’t that old –<br />

our parents’ age, I bet. How did he die?”<br />

Ted showed her his phone. Nellie read the post<br />

out loud. “Benjamin Rochester Brown’s death remains<br />

a mystery. The authorities report he died of an<br />

overdose of prescription drugs, and an investigation<br />

is ongoing. His cousin and podcast partner, Ralph<br />

Watson, created a charity for suicide awareness in<br />

Bennie’s name. Click here to donate.”<br />

“I know how much you love a mystery, Nellie, but<br />

this place feels a bit morbid, even for me,” Charlie<br />

said as she riffled through a box. “O. M. G., guys, look<br />

what I found!”<br />

They gathered around her as she displayed beautiful<br />

sweater after beautiful sweater. They could only<br />

assume each one was a Bennie Brown original pattern<br />

sample. “These are all marked $25. What the – ”<br />

Beth pointed at the house’s driveway. “Uh, isn’t<br />

that your dad’s car, Nellie?”<br />

It was. Ted didn’t seem surprised by his presence.<br />

Nellie narrowed her eyes at him. “Why is my dad<br />

here?”<br />

A deep voice behind them replied, “I’m a probate<br />

attorney for the deceased. Ted must have mentioned<br />

that, as he is our firm’s new summer intern.”<br />

Ted reached into his backpack and retrieved a<br />

manila envelope. He handed it to Mr. Blue. “This arrived<br />

in the mail yesterday. Mr. Fox said you’ve been<br />

waiting for it, so I volunteered to deliver it to you personally.”<br />

Mr. Blue took the envelope and thanked Ted. He<br />

seemed to forget Nellie was there. “I hope it’s okay<br />

that we’re here, Dad.”<br />

Without looking up, he replied, “You’re as welcome<br />

as anyone to buy or bid on the remaining<br />

property of the deceased. Nellie, your love for true<br />

crime and mysterious deaths and all that must be<br />

hard to suppress, but you must. I can only imagine<br />

the questions forming in your little gray cells. But I<br />

can’t answer them.”<br />

“Client confidentiality agreement?” Beth asked.<br />

Mr. Blue hesitated as he perused their disappointed<br />

faces. “Something like that.” He looked<br />

back to the envelope in his hand.<br />

Charlie scoffed. “What are you afraid of? Deceased<br />

people can’t fire their lawyers, can they?”<br />

“Uh… well… that’s… I work for the deceased family’s<br />

interests. Some of them are quite alive.”<br />

Nellie grabbed Charlie’s arm and pulled her back<br />

to the box of sweaters. “Don’t worry, Dad, we’ll leave<br />

you alone. As far as you’re concerned, we’re just here<br />

shopping.”<br />

Mr. Blue frowned. “Good. You can bring your selections<br />

to the garage.” He shuffled to the front door<br />

and greeted a short, plump woman with curly brown<br />

hair and a saccharine smile. “That’s Mrs. Watson,” Ted<br />

said. “Cousin Ralph’s wife. She’s in charge of the charity.<br />

Part of the proceeds from the estate sale go to it.”<br />

“Hey, Ted. Since you aren’t an attorney, nothing is<br />

keeping you from answering my questions,” Nellie<br />

said.<br />

Ted grinned. He loved how much Nellie enjoyed<br />

sleuthing. Her pretty eyes sparkled even more when<br />

there was a mystery afoot. “I’m not at liberty to divulge<br />

confidential information, but I can’t stop you<br />

from coming to your own conclusions. Your dad already<br />

gave you a hint. What was it?”<br />

Nellie thought it over. “He said that he knows I<br />

love true crime and mysterious deaths. Oh – Bennie’s<br />

death wasn’t a suicide, was it?”<br />

“Consider the facts. The sheriff hasn’t closed the<br />

case, even though the press claims his death was an<br />

accidental overdose and his cousin assumes it was a<br />

suicide. Does the sheriff have a reason to mislead the<br />

media?”<br />

“He suspects foul play and wants to fool the perpetrator?”<br />

Nellie asked.<br />

“That’s possible. Make the murderer believe they<br />

got away with it, so they relax and slip up. Another interesting<br />

fact: they have not found the will. The extended<br />

family is in limbo. Some say the Watsons<br />

started the suicide awareness fund as a backup<br />

hedge fund. People on the socials claim he had a falling<br />

out with his cousin – his only blood relative. This<br />

estate must be worth a fortune.”<br />

Charlie swept her finger over a gold embossed<br />

cover of Jane Eyre. “People have killed for less. How<br />

Continued on next page...<br />

33


Reclaim Continued...<br />

can a lowly knitwear designer afford to live in a snooty<br />

place like this?”<br />

Before Ted could reply, Nellie interrupted. “Let me<br />

guess.” She scanned the estate sale, noting the mismatched<br />

styles of furniture and decor. Even the two<br />

cars in the garage were as different as Beth and Charlie.<br />

“He inherited money from,” she picked up a set of<br />

monogrammed towels edged with lace, “his widowed<br />

mother.”<br />

“That seems plausible,” Ted said, grinning. Nellie<br />

beamed at him.<br />

Beth dragged out a box hidden under an overloaded<br />

card table. She leaned in and exclaimed, “This<br />

is perfect!” She lifted a massive curtain of gray stockinette<br />

and pushed it into Ted’s reluctant arms.<br />

“Perfect?”<br />

“To reclaim the wool, silly. It follows all the rules: It’s<br />

a pullover. It’s one color. Unfortunately, it has a big kangaroo<br />

pocket, but I bet Charlie can finagle it off without<br />

ruining it.”<br />

Charlie winked. “Sure, no problem-o.”<br />

Ted held the sweater up. It was so big that two of<br />

him could fit inside.<br />

“This must have been a sample of the largest size.”<br />

Nellie flipped over the back to search for a tag. A handwritten<br />

label safety pinned there read 4XL.<br />

They purchased the sweater for $25, marveling at<br />

the fantastic deal. That much wool from a knit store<br />

might cost hundreds, depending on the brand.<br />

The house was open, so they decided to take a tour,<br />

i.e., look for clues. As all the furnishings were on the<br />

front lawn, their footsteps echoed off the yellow-papered<br />

walls and high ceilings.<br />

“I just got shivers,” Beth said.<br />

Charlie gulped. “Me too. What a lonely place. All<br />

this space for one person? What a waste.”<br />

“I watched his podcast once,” Nellie said. “He was a<br />

straight-laced, serious guy. His cousin, Ralph, was a<br />

jokester. Mom said they reminded her of Laurel and<br />

Hardy.” Charlie raised an eyebrow. Nellie added, “It’s<br />

an old television show.”<br />

Charlie waved her hand at Nellie and Ted. “You<br />

were both born in the wrong century.”<br />

Beth whispered, “I wonder if the rumors are true.”<br />

“What rumors?” a strange voice asked behind them.<br />

They turned to see a stocky man with a dark mustache<br />

and round, dimpled cheeks. Beth stifled a grin as her<br />

imagination conjured up an image of a mouse with a<br />

mustache and spectacles. “Hello, I’m Ralph Watson, the<br />

jokester cousin. And who are you, fine young folks?”<br />

“I’m Ted Tickerson. I work for the Blue, Sayers, and<br />

Fox Family Law Firm, and this is Mr. Blue’s daughter,<br />

Nellie.” They shook hands with Mr. Watson.<br />

“And who are these two lovely ladies?” Ralph<br />

tipped his head toward Beth and Charlie.<br />

Charlie crossed her arms and scowled, but Beth returned<br />

his smile. “We’re Nellie’s bestest friends. I’m<br />

Beth Hastings and this is my sister – ”<br />

“Foster sister. My name is Charlie.”<br />

“Charlie? Short for Charlotte?”<br />

“Yes, good guess. Charlotte Jane, if you must<br />

know.”<br />

His jovial face darkened. “My cousin was a fan of<br />

the Brontes, too.”<br />

“The who?”<br />

“Never mind.”<br />

Loud voices wafted in from the open window, distracting<br />

them. Their curiosity peaked. Nellie was the<br />

first one to reach the window.<br />

Two women faced each other. One was Mrs. Watson,<br />

but the shadow of a sprawling oak obscured the<br />

other woman’s face. She wore a long white sundress<br />

with a light shawl draped over her thin shoulders. They<br />

both appeared agitated. Hands in fists, hair loose, faces<br />

red.<br />

“Leave this property. You are not welcome here!”<br />

Mrs. Watson said.<br />

The mystery woman spoke through heaving sobs.<br />

“You have no right to tell me where I can or cannot go.”<br />

“I saw that woman earlier,” Nellie said. “She was sitting<br />

in an old convertible when we arrived, crying.”<br />

Ralph’s round face turned beet red. “The audacity!”<br />

He scurried through the house and out the front door.<br />

The rest of the gang followed the drama. The<br />

woman in white wiped her eyes with a tissue while Mrs.<br />

Watson continued to berate her.<br />

“You left him all those years ago and broke his<br />

heart. He never recovered and now – and now – ”<br />

“I made a mistake. I’ve made so many mistakes. But<br />

I’ve changed. Praise God, I’m sober and stable now. I<br />

wish it hadn’t taken me so long to get my life right. I<br />

never imagined Bennie would die before I could tell<br />

him the truth – ”<br />

Continued on next page...<br />

34


Reclaim Continued...<br />

Ralph interrupted. He pointed at Mr. Blue. “Rose, my<br />

lawyer is here. Do I also need to call the Sheriff? My<br />

wife asked you to leave.”<br />

Mr. Blue approached the scene, his jaw clenched<br />

tight. Nellie hoped he wouldn’t be too hard on the<br />

poor sad woman. He could be downright stern in the<br />

courtroom, or when Nellie asked too many questions.<br />

“Miss, what is your name?” he asked gently.<br />

The woman straightened like a plant in sunlight. “I’m<br />

Rose Collins.”<br />

“Ah, Rose Collins. I’ve been looking for you.”<br />

“You have?”<br />

He pulled out the manila envelope Ted had delivered.<br />

Opening it, he handed her the sheet inside. “I<br />

have the results of the test Bennie agreed to take for<br />

you. You may want to sit down.”<br />

He guided her over to a set of dining chairs. She sat<br />

down and read the paper. Tears cascaded down her<br />

cheeks. “What do I do now?”<br />

“You can tell her,” he said and pointed at the gang.<br />

Her wet eyes glimpsed Ted, Nellie, Beth, and Charlie.<br />

They all stood there, perplexed.<br />

“What the devil is going on?” Charlie asked.<br />

The woman gasped. “You sound just like Benjamin.”<br />

As the woman approached, Charlie backed up. “I<br />

don’t know you, lady.”<br />

“That’s true, and I’m eternally sorry for that. I’d like to<br />

spend the rest of my life making it up to you if you’ll let<br />

me. We can start by having dinner if you’d like.”<br />

Charlie stared at her, mute.<br />

The woman continued, “I’m your mother.”<br />

Finally, Charlie spoke again. “Why are you here?”<br />

“Benjamin Brown and I were both English majors at<br />

college. We were young, crazy, and foolish then. We<br />

fought over the stupidest things, and I left him. When I<br />

found out I was pregnant, I thought I could handle it all<br />

by myself. I tried my best, but I failed you, Charlotte. My<br />

friends convinced me to let someone else care for you<br />

until I got my life together.”<br />

“Took you long enough!” Charlie retorted. “Why<br />

didn’t my father raise me?”<br />

“I never told anyone who the father was. I wasn’t<br />

sure. Not until now.” She held up a lab sheet. “This<br />

proves you’re Benjamin’s daughter.”<br />

Mr. Blue cleared his throat. “And you’re his sole<br />

heir.”<br />

Ralph Watson burst out, “But there’s no will! Surely<br />

the law won’t allow an estranged child to inherit over<br />

those of us who have known and loved him our whole<br />

lives.”<br />

“I’ve only ever wanted one thing, and it wasn’t<br />

money,” Charlie said, a tear coursing down her cheek.<br />

She fell into Rose’s arms. Rose embraced her long-lost<br />

daughter.<br />

Red and blue lights flashed from the street as a police<br />

car entered the driveway. Mr. Blue addressed the<br />

officer, “What’s the matter, sir?”<br />

“I called them,” Mrs. Watson said with a huff.<br />

“You did? Well, what a coincidence.” The officer<br />

reached for his handcuffs and approached her. “Mrs.<br />

Watson, I’m here to arrest you for the murder of Benjamin<br />

Brown. You have the right to remain silent.” When<br />

he finished reading her Miranda rights, his partner<br />

opened the door of his vehicle and Mrs. Watson reluctantly<br />

climbed inside.<br />

Ralph ran to the car window. “What did you do?”<br />

Her saccharine smile distorted into an evil smirk.<br />

“What you couldn’t.”<br />

Nellie was aghast. She’d never seen this coming.<br />

She hadn’t had enough time or enough clues to figure<br />

out this mystery, she told herself. It was an impossible<br />

task, like when mystery authors trick the reader by withholding<br />

vital information. But Nellie’s frustration dissipated<br />

as she watched Charlie speaking with her birth<br />

mother.<br />

“She’s like the sweater,” Beth said, sniffling. “She’s<br />

been reclaimed.”<br />

Nellie threw her arm around Beth’s shoulders.<br />

Ted retrieved the massive sweater from the bag.<br />

What a great reminder this yarn will be of this day, he<br />

thought. He folded the sweater before returning it to<br />

the bag and noticed something stiff inside the kangaroo<br />

pocket. “How did this get here?,” he asked himself<br />

and pulled out the item. It was an envelope. He opened<br />

it and read the document inside, his face erupting with<br />

glee. “Mr. Blue, did someone say Mr. Brown’s will was<br />

missing? Guess what I found!”<br />

35


By Uknitted Kingdom<br />

GREEN &<br />

CABBAGE-LOOKING<br />

Several years ago, a friend asked me to knit a hat as a<br />

gift for his Chinese mother-in-law. He (from Ecuador) and<br />

his wife (from China) were traveling back to Sichuan Province<br />

the following week.<br />

As it happened, I was just finishing off a simple beanie<br />

in a stunning green color. At the time, the pair were staying<br />

with me whilst they purchased their own home. He<br />

and I were both happy, he had a unique, hand-made<br />

present for his mother-in-law, and I had spread some joy<br />

with my knitting.<br />

Not long after, he proudly took the hat to show his wife<br />

and all hell broke loose. Normally quietly spoken and reserved,<br />

his wife was shouting, in Mandarin. She wasn’t<br />

angry at me, but it turns out she was deeply offended<br />

that her husband, fluent in Mandarin and having lived in<br />

China for a decade prior, would even think about giving<br />

her mother a green hat!<br />

She explained, to wear a green hat meant that your<br />

partner was having an affair. I laughed. “What? Why<br />

would you advertise that your partner was having an affair?”<br />

The logic wasn’t “logic-ing.”<br />

She went on to say that if you visit China and wear a<br />

green hat, you will be openly mocked. Expect to be ostracized,<br />

pointed at, and laughed at. Even Western tourists<br />

are subjected to this bizarre treatment.<br />

I’ve since learned more about this green hat discrimination.<br />

It applies to any head covering; hat, hood, headscarf,<br />

bandana, anything! Basically, if it is green do not<br />

put it on your head. The only exception to this is military<br />

hats.<br />

To my knowledge, there are no other taboos in modern<br />

China associated<br />

with green.<br />

Green, as a color, is<br />

as popular in China<br />

as any other. I wondered<br />

if this was a<br />

regional curiosity,<br />

but no, it is widespread<br />

across<br />

China. It is also believed in Hong Kong, arguably the<br />

most “Western” of China’s regions. Considering Hong<br />

Kong was a British territory between 1842 and 1997 (except<br />

from 1941 to 1945 when it was occupied by Japan)<br />

this cultural phenomenon must have been a legacy of<br />

the Qing Dynasty (1636 to 1912) if not earlier.<br />

There are several widely accepted explanations for the<br />

green hat superstition:<br />

• In the Tang Dynasty (618 to 907AD), green clothes<br />

were worn by the lowest-ranking officials. Criminals were<br />

also made to wear green as a method of identification.<br />

• In the Yuan Dynasty (1271 to 1368AD) and the Ming<br />

Dynasty (1368 to 1644AD) prostitutes and their immediate<br />

relatives, labeled “the family of the green lantern”<br />

were forced to wear green headwear so “polite society”<br />

could avoid them when seen. Where Western prostitutes<br />

and their customers may frequent a “Red Light District,”<br />

in China and other Eastern countries, this is known as a<br />

“Green Light/Lantern District.”<br />

• The Chinese word for “cuckold” (a man whose wife is<br />

unfaithful) is the same or similar in sound to “to wear a<br />

green hat.”<br />

However, the following explanation is the most enduring:<br />

“The Cheating Wife and the Cuckold Husband”<br />

During the Tang Dynasty (618 to 907 AD), there was a<br />

dedicated scholar named Li Yuanming ( 李 缘 铭 ) who<br />

married a beautiful woman named Cifu ( 辞 赋 ). Being<br />

the intense literati that he was, Li Yuanming would often<br />

meet with friends to compose, analyze, and debate poetry<br />

late into the night. Often, he would travel away on<br />

long business trips,<br />

leaving his wife<br />

alone for days on<br />

end. Cifu began to<br />

feel sad and neglected.<br />

During one<br />

of her husband’s<br />

trips, she fell in love<br />

with their next-door<br />

36


By Uknitted Kingdom<br />

neighbor, a widowed cloth merchant.<br />

At this time, it was common for scholars to wear<br />

special green hats to mark their profession. To signal<br />

to her secret lover that her husband was away and it<br />

was safe to be together, Cifu would put on the green<br />

hat and walk along on the street outside. This went on<br />

for quite some time until one day Li Yuanming forgot<br />

a volume of poetry. He rushed back home only to discover<br />

the affair. In a fit of blinding rage, Li Yuanming<br />

threw the two out of the house, making quite the<br />

scene for passersby. Word of Li Yuanming’s shame<br />

spread throughout the village, especially Cifu’s usage<br />

of her husband’s green hat. (Why wearing a green hat<br />

symbolizes infidelity in China 2024)<br />

The moral of this story: unless you want to cause an<br />

international incident, never give a Chinese person a<br />

green hat, imply they should wear a green hat, or<br />

wear a green hat in their presence!<br />

With St Patrick’s Day approaching on 17 March 2024,<br />

if you are in China or your local Chinatown, rather<br />

than appearing “green and cabbage-looking,” it<br />

might be wiser to avoid celebrating whilst sporting a<br />

green hat.<br />

https://www.scmp.com/magazines/hk-magazine/article/2038125/wear-green-hat?campaign=2038125&module=perpetual_scroll_0&pgtype=article<br />

https://zolimacitymag.com/pop-cantonese-%E6%88%B4%E7%B6%A0%E5%B8%BD-wearing-green-hat/<br />

https://stephwaxpoetic.com/2021/03/17/why-wearing-a-green-hat-symbolizes-infidelity-in-china-%E6%88%B4%E7%BB%BF%E5%B8%BD%E5%AD%90/<br />

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Green#Love_and_sexuality<br />

https://chinese.stackexchange.com/questions/29242/%E6%88%B4%E7%BB%BF%E5%B8%BD%E5%AD%90-as-based-on-a-pun<br />

Crossword Answers:<br />

37


Simple Knits<br />

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