Lot's Wife Edition 2 2015

Lot’s Wife 

MONNSH UNIVERSITY STUDENT MAGAZINE - CLAYTON 

ISSUE TWO - 2015

The federal Liberal Government’s proposed plans to deregulate 

fees, cut funding and slash student income support will mean a 

decade of debt for students and a generation of young people 

ruling out tertiary education. In 2015, students are coming 

together to make our voices heard in opposition to the 

Government's plans for our universities. 

unistudent.com.au 

@NUS_Education 

NATIONAL DAY OF ACTION 

2 5 MAR CH 2015

As Caulfield being my main campus, I am only familiar with a 

few things, namely a couple of buildings at Clayton; Robert- 

Blackwood Hall, the Campus Centre and the monumental 

structure that is Menzies. To an extent these buildings represent 

Clayton in a nutshell, the representative elements of Monash 

promotional material. However, the images I mostly associate 

with the Clayton campus are the spectacular gumtrees and 

quintessentially Australian flora that shroud the buildings. 

Without the existing nature, the Clayton campus would arguably 

be a barren metropolis. 

The idea for the cover art came to me as fleeting 

thought, the Clayton campus in prehistoric tense. My work is an 

abstract expression of the untouched bushland that remains at 

Monash, a representation of Australia’s pure landscape before 

British colonisation. Perhaps some of the tree existed prior the 

eighteenth century. The cover art was created using fine liner 

pens and markers to develop a dynamic, primitive landscape 

to spark ones imagination about what Clayton may have 

possiblbvy looked like many thousands of years ago. Another 

idea I had was to imagine the environment of our world many 

hundreds of years into the future, and perhaps the image I’ve 

created also satisfies that notion. The odd colouring of the 

swamp water, with the slimy substances oozing off limbs, may 

reflect our future. Who is to know how different the Earth will 

appear in many years from now, and how the planet looks is in 

our hands. 

I’m an individual who firmly believes in the protection 

of Australia’s natural flora and fauna. Therefore, it’s without 

a doubt that the actions we take now will determine our 

environment’s future. I feel that this idea of environmental 

change will be an ongoing theme throughout my artistic 

practice, and within my BVA degree. Moreover, these ideas are 

perhaps topics that we should collectively be engaging with, to 

celebrate and preserve Australia’s extraordinary environment. 

“Without the existing 

nature, the Clayton 

campus would 

arguably be a barren 

metropolis.” 

COVER ARTWORK BY 

MONICA HUNT

EDITORS 

Anna Hill 

Bill Molloy 

Claire Rowe 

Jarrod Verity 

Contents 

DESIGN 

Danielle Natividad 

Timothy Newport 

5 Editorial 6 OB Reports 8 Letters 

Politics 

POLITICS 

STUDENT 

AFFAIRS 

Bree Guthrie 

Hareesh Makam 

Kirsti Weisz 

Tom Clelland 

Julia Pillai 

Kristin Robertson 

Nathan Steinkoler 

Rosie Boyle 

10 

12 

14 

15 

16 

Hijacking #AutismSpeaks 

When senior ministers 

attack the public offices 

Age of Entitlement 

US Education System told 

through TV 

Political Donations 

SCIENCE & 

ENGINEERING 

Alisoun Townsend 

Kathy Zhang 

Student 

Affairs 

ARTS & 

CULTURE 

SEX 

Emily Neilsen 

Kashmi Renasinghe 

Kelly Pigram 

Lisa Healy 

Michaela Scully 

Rhyss Wyllie 

18 

20 

22 

24 

25 

Science & 

Engineering 

Bring it on Melbourne! 

One World Festival 

Clubs Worth a Scope 

Lot’s Wife Top Four: Units 

Misusing Prescription 

Drugs 

PHOTOGRAPHY 

Adrienne Bicknell 

Carina Florea 

29 

30 

31 

32 

33 

34 

The Forest in the Trees 

True Science Facts! 

Mitochondrial Diseases 

How Smart are Computers? 

Internships 

Sustainability at Monash 

© Lot’s Wife 2015, Monash University Clayton, Victoria 

As you read this paper you are on Aboriginal land. We at 

Lot’s Wife recognise the Wurundjeri and Boon Wurrung 

peoples of the Kulin Nations as the historical and rightful 

owners and custodians of the lands and waters on which 

this newspaper is produced. The land was stolen and 

sovereignty was never ceded. 

Lot’s Wife condemns and will not publish any 

material that is racist, sexist, queerphobic, ableist, or 

discriminatory in any nature. The views expressed herein 

are those of the attributed writers and do not necessarily 

reflect the views of the editors or the MSA. All writing and 

artwork remains the property of the producers and must 

not be reproduced without their written consent. 

Arts & 

Culture 

36 

38 

40 

41 

Sex 

44 

46 

47 

48 

50 

The Dark Knight Rises 

Superfoods 

Celebrity, Power & Kim K 

Monash Music 

Learning Kamasutra 

Gaytriarchy 

The Wondering Uterus 

Tricking 

My Kitchen Rules

Editorial 

Hello there! We’ve been really really really busy in the 

past few weeks in preparation for our second edition. 

We’ve been so busy that we haven’t actually left our 

office at all. In fact, we haven’t even seen our families 

in almost a month. You know what; we’ve been so 

busy that we have no idea whether or not Tony Abbott 

is still our prime minister. We don’t even know if the 

Easter break has come and gone, or if university fees 

have been deregulated. 

So for all we know, we’ve missed the midsemester 

break, acquired a 100,000,000 dollar HECS 

debt* and Cory Bernardi has become the leader of our 

country. 

Naturally, being so busy, we had no idea all 

the other office bearers were equally as busy until we 

received their OB reports; 

Our secretary Daniel King notes that ‘It’s 

been a busy few weeks at the MSA with Orientation 

Festival and then getting everything up and running 

for the Semester.’ 

Similarly, our treasurer Abigail Stapleton 

claims that ‘It has been a very busy few weeks for the 

MSA executive.’ 

And it’s not just the executive that’s been 

busy… 

‘The Education (Academic Affairs) department has 

been really busy preparing for the 

MSA Peer Support Program’. 

‘It’s been a busy month for the Education Public Affairs 

department with O-week being really successful.’ 

‘It’s been a busy beer for Activities’. 

‘The Environment and Social Justice Department has 

been busy over the last few weeks.’ 

But being busy has its advantages too! After spending 

hours on the phone trying to acquire advertising, we 

now know that Expedia has the best waiting music 

going around (look out for our article in the next 

edition; ‘top 10: call waiting music’). 

So what is it that has kept us so busy, you 

ask? We improved our carpentry skills by building 

a new magazine stand situated near lecture halls 

E1-3. In other news, while Bill has been restricted 

to the confines of Sir John’s bar drinking the same 

pot of Nine Tails for the past two weeks, the others 

have been cooped up in the office producing this fine 

publication. Jarrod has now also listened to the entire 

discography of Radiohead and Bill is beginning to 

learn what a pint is. 

However, some people who are actually 

busy have been so kind as to volunteer their time 

to this magazine. A special mention to our graphic 

design team, who have put in countless hours to 

collate all of our content - approximately the same 

amount of time it would take for us to be taught how 

to use paint. Our writers, as usual, have also made a 

significant contribution to this magazine. 

We’d especially like to thank Dr. Alice 

de Jonge, a senior lecturer here at Monash, 

for submitting her piece on the Human Rights 

Commission. Dr. de Jonge was involved in the open 

letter written in support of the Commission and its 

President Gillian Triggs. We are very grateful for her 

taking the time to write on an issue which we believe 

is an extremely important matter for our society. 

However, if you’re reading the editorial of 

Lot’s Wife, let’s face it; you’re probably not so busy. 

Hence, we are more than certain that you will have 

enough time to attend the National Day of Action 

against fee deregulation on March 25 at the State 

Library. 

If ever you have a burning question for us**, 

feel free to swing by our office where at least one of 

us will be. However, Bill of course, will never be in the 

office. He will still be in Sir John’s, half way through 

his second beer, poured in 2013. 

*However, Claire would have only accrued a 100,000 

dollar debt as, being a woman, she would study 

nothing other than nursing or teaching. 

**We actually got letters to the editor this time!

6 

OB REPORTS 

President: Sinead Colee 

Week 4 already? I can’t believe it myself! After a successful 

Members Week in week two, we are now well and truly into 

the semester! A thank you to everyone who came out to enjoy 

the Members Week Carnival, the Moonlight Cinema, the Rocky 

Horror of a Boo Cruise and all the free food and prizes that were 

on offer - but most of all, thank you to those of you who chose 

to support the union that supports you by buying an MSA card. 

We now almost have 9000 members and are still growing! 

Another project I’ve been working on is the MSA Laptop Library 

- a service that allows you to loan a laptop for up to two weeks 

if yours breaks down which will be operating out of the MSA’s 

John Medley Library. Keep an eye out for its launch in the 

coming weeks. 

And lastly, if you’re having trouble getting a blue 

parking and want to complain to somebody just send me an 

email at president.msa@monash.edu and let me know how 

effects you and your studies! 

Ciao for now! 

Secretary: Daniel King 

It’s been a busy few weeks at the MSA with Orientation Festival 

and then getting everything up and running for the Semester. 

We’ve had a very successful start to the semester with almost 

9,000 MSA Members already and almost the same number 

getting involved with clubs. If you haven’t already, got your MSA 

card and get involved with some of our clubs and events! 

Note: Some of my fellow office-bearers took creative licence 

with editing my last Report, for the record; I have not yet been 

fortunate enough to be involved with the fantasy and sci-fi club 

and have never been involved with the Marxism Conference. 

Treasurer: Abby Stapleton 

It has been a very busy few weeks for the MSA executive. We 

have had lots of things to organise in regards to orientation 

week and MSA member’s week. This included making arrangements 

for the moonlight cinema, as well as planning for the 

‘Rocky Horror show’ themed ‘Boo cruise’. Along with helping 

with the set up of members week I have finished the chart of 

accounts for each department. The chart of accounts provides 

office bearers with an idea of the amount of money they have to 

spend throughout the year. We have heaps planned for the rest 

of semester, so keep an eye for your MSA reps! 

Education (Academic Affairs): 

Amelia Veronese 

Hi everyone! The Education (Academic Affairs) department has 

been really busy preparing for the MSA Peer Support Program 

that will begin in Week 3 this semester and run until Week 12 in 

the John Medley Library for students who want to improve their 

English Language in assignments. So, if you have upcoming 

assessments and need assistance with English language proficiency 

or know someone who does, come along to a drop-in 

session. I’m also currently working on ensuring that all faculties 

maintain that delayed deferred exams remain on offer to all 

students. Stay tuned as there will be an upcoming campaign 

released where students will be able to have the opportunity to 

express why they think it’s important to have delayed deferred 

exams. 

Education (Public Affairs): 

Sarah Spivak & Mali Rea 

It’s been a busy month for the Education Public Affairs department 

with O-week being really successful. We spoke to hundreds 

of students, handed out flyers that outlined the impacts 

of deregulation, advertised our department week (Week 3) and 

spread the word about the upcoming National Day of Action 

protest on March 25th. We’ve had three successful Monash 

Education Action Group meetings which have been important 

in our organising and building for the NDA. We’ve also been 

planning events for our department week the week prior to the 

NDA. Like the MSA Education page for more info or how to get 

involved! 

Environment & Social Justice 

Officers: Lauren Goldsmith 

The Environment and Social Justice Department has been 

busy over the last few weeks. We’ve been planning for what 

was a very successful Global Divestment Day, speaking with 

students during O-Week, building up the membership of the 

Environment and Social Justice Collective, and working on the 

Fossil Free Monash campaign; a broad and grassroots effort by 

the student population to convince the university to divest its 

finances from fossil fuels, and reinvest in funds which support 

growth and research in renewable energy. 

The Fossil Free Monash introductory meeting and 

planning session was very lively, and started the process of 

planning some exciting actions and events for the Fossil Free 

national day of campus action, coming up on April 22nd! 

As students, it is up to us to show that we want our 

University to take a stand on the issue of climate change, and to 

take positive action for climate justice.

7 

Queer Officers: Viv Stewart & 

Jarvis Sparks 

The Queer department has spent most of its time in the past 

few weeks setting up and preparing for a wonderful year 

ahead. During O-week we Queer Officers enjoyed greeting old 

and new faces alike, expanding our mailing list and introducing 

our events and plans for the next year at our wonderful 

rainbow-coloured stall. Since then, we have spent the majority 

of our time planning ahead for Queer Week and starting up 

our weekly events. There has been a Queer morning tea, Queer 

Beers and a Queer screening so far with more to come in the 

next few weeks. Furthermore, we have been meeting with various 

other people, such as the Ally Network and the Faculty of 

Arts in order to plan and being collaborations in order to make 

the university as a whole more welcoming and supporting of 

queer students. 

Women’s Officers: Ellen Flach 

& Sophie Vassallo 

Semester is well in the swing of things and so are we! O-week 

was a huge success with over 300 students wanting to get 

involved in the department – we are very excited to have you all 

around! 

We also had our Meet the Department Morning Tea 

(which was in the afternoon) in the Women’s Lounge. It was 

great to see so many new faces also in our first discussion 

group ‘Why a Women’s Room’. The pace is not letting up, we 

have our first monthly Skill Share happening on Thursday. 

Week 3 (19th of March) at 2pm which will be on 

gardening with the Monash Permaculture garden and our wonderful 

Twilight Market Fundraiser on Thursday, Week 4 (26th of 

March). 

Activities Officers: 

Tahnee Burgess & Jake Krelle 

It’s been a busy beer for Activities. O Week saw more people 

come through than we have ever before. This included serving 

more than 5600 sausages, veggie burgers, hash browns and 

thousands of beverages throughout the week. As well as this 

the Luna park event was a huge success with almost 1500 

people coming down for unlimited rides from both Monash and 

Melbourne. 

Stay tuned for more info on our Comedy Night, Auntie 

Donna is already confirmed and more acts will be announced 

soon. 

OB REPORTS 

Welfare Officers: 

Rebecca Adams & Jesse Cameron 

WOO - the start of semester has begun! We had many people 

come visit our O Week stall to check out what we do and 

peruse our temporary Survival Centre set up (so much perusal 

that we are now short on supplies! We always welcome more 

donations). The permanent Survival Centre is located L1 down 

the corridor from the John Medley Library and on your right, 

and is always open to come get what you need, when in need 

(including clothes, crockery, other odd assortments). We had 

our first Free Food Mondays (running every Monday 7:30 at 

Wholefoods) where students indulged on delicious roast veggie 

pasta and potato dahl with rice. 

The much anticipated 2015 Survival Guide is now 

released! Come get a copy at any of our events or from the MSA 

reception desk. 

Exciting plans are also underway for Survival Week 

in week 4, so keep an eye out on our Facebook page for all 

updates and events: MSA Welfare Department =) 

Disabilities Officers: 

Edie Shepherd & Andrew Day 

Edition two? How are we up to edition two already? 

After what was – for a new department – a very 

successful OWeek the Disabilities and Carers department is 

rolling on into the semester. Many thanks to our volunteers 

who helped out at the stall, the Monash Autistic Collective in 

particular. You guys do good work. 

We’ll have our first campaign coming out in Week 4, 

Caring for Carers so be sure to keep your eyes and ears peeled 

for us. We’ve also got a survey circulating called “Monash 

Check-Up” where you can give your feedback on disability 

services around Monash. There’s no improvement without 

consultation!

8 

Letters 

Dear Lot’s Wife, 

I don’t think its to much to expect perfection from 

a team of student editors from their frist publication which is 

why I was outraged at the speling mistake on the front cover 

of your most recent edition. 

If we are ever to save the english langage and 

the fragile creature that is print media we must expect 

nothing less then a slave like devotion to correvt spelling 

and grammer from people who wish to position themselves 

as leaders in the feild. Profreading is a vital and necesary 

process. 

I will bereading your next edition with a fine tooth 

combe and will be dilligantly making sure that I am getting 

my value for SSAF money. 

Yours 

Concerned Arts Student 

*sent from my iphone* 

A request has been made of us to publish one of our 

editor's responses to the following letter. We decided to 

act upon this request to ensure our readership is made 

well aware of the unerring professionalism that permeates 

throughout the editorial board here at Lot's Wife. 

Dear Lot’s Wife (Student Affairs Team), 

I offer my sincere gratitude after reading last issue’s ‘Dear 

First Years’ piece, and would like to express that I found it 

immeasurably helpful and informative. Being new to the whole 

“university life” system I was more than relieved to discover your 

thoughtful listing of 20 Things I Should Know As A First Year That 

No One Can Tell Me Officially. Despite my inadequate experiences 

of Monash University culture I do believe that the article reflects 

the charitable, considerate mentality shared by the students and 

assorted associates of the uni. I was glad to learn that the clubs and 

societies at Monash are so accessible and did - in fact - go out and 

join almost ten of them with fervour. Thanks for the tips on WiFi 

as well - I won’t even bother searching for an ‘eduroam’ or ‘guest 

wireless’ connection on my smart phone (my new friends seemed 

to have tried those. Whenever they yell “Eureka! A connection!” I 

glare at them darkly and hiss “plebeians” under my breath.). I’ll 

also be sure to head to the Rotunda whenever nature calls. I don’t 

think I could stand having to “go” in a tiled cube-room reminiscent 

of a Flinders Street Station stall. And the free printing! This means 

that I can make infinite copies of my home-made extremist political 

fliers whilst disregarding the environment and saving the money I 

would’ve otherwise spent (e.g. 10 cents per page) to buy mutant icecream 

burgers at Maccas. The piece was truly loaded with valuable 

info on starting university: no on-campus drinking; no reserving 

controversial political opinions; no worries about transitioning 

or “learning curves”; and lastly, no reading Lot’s Wife, which is 

undoubtably not a magazine built by intelligent, open-minded, 

good-humoured people. 

Infinite thanks, 

A proud JAFFY.

Politics 

Articles by Julia Pillai, Dr. Alice de 

Jonge, Hareesh Makam, Mali Rea, and 

Tom Clelland 

ILLUSTRATION BY JULIA PILLAI

10 

Why #ActuallyAutistic people 

hijacked #AutismSpeaks10 

BY JULIA PILLAI 

CONTENT WARNING: MURDER, MEDICAL MALPRACTICE, ABUSIVE THERAPIES 

To celebrate their tenth anniversary, American Autism 

organisation Autism Speaks, launched ‘#AutismSpeaks10’ which 

was designed to get individuals sharing stories about how the 

organisation had touched their lives. The expectation was that 

these stories would be produce positive messages, such as this: 

@USRepMikeDoyle ‘Congratulations @ 

AutismSpeaks on 10 years of autism education, research, 

advocacy, and assistance to individuals with ASDs. 

#Autismspeaks10’ 

However, the tag was overwhelmingly used by a range of 

individuals and groups within the Autism community to express 

their anger and discontent with the organisation. Other tags such 

as #ActuallyAutistic and #AutismChampions were also used to 

express opposition to Autism Speaks. 

Author and Autism self-advocate John Elder Robison 

was actively in support of the tagline hijack on Twitter. Until 

November 2013, Robison was a member of both the science and 

treatment boards of Autism Speaks. He also was the only openly 

autistic person who was a member of an advisory board of the 

organisation. Robison resigned after becoming disillusioned 

with the organisation, in response to co-founder Suzanne Wright 

publishing the Op-Ed “Autism Speaks to Washington - A Call 

To Action’. In it she proclaimed that families of Autistic people 

‘are not living… Life is lived moment-to-moment… In despair.’ 

As part of the hijack, Robison tweeted a powerful message; 

‘We asked Autism Speaks to listen but that’s not enough, 

and it hasn’t worked. It’s time for Autistic People to take over 

#AutismSpeaks10’. 

Ari Ne’eman who is the co-Founder and president of the 

Autism Self Advocacy Network (ASAN), run by Autistic people with 

international chapters, was also in favour of the hijack. In a reply, 

he tweeted ‘ … So good to see so many folks in our community 

speak out against those who talk about us without us.’ 

Other tweets included: 

@katimillsart tweeted ‘How has #AutismSpeaks10 

“touched my life”? They helped me go from human being to 

burdensome epidemic. Thanks A$! #ActuallyAutistic’ 

@xndrmcd “Autism Speaks wants to know 

how they’ve touched us? That’s like Bill Cosby calling the 

morning after.#AutismSpeaks10 #ActuallyAutistic’ 

@THEKarenOglivie’#autismspeaks10 would have 

you believe that my #ActuallyAutistic son is broken. Its time 

to stop speaking and start listening, Autism Speaks!’ 

Rage against Autism Speaks is not a new phenomenon, and the 

underlying cause of this dissent is the clash between differing 

ideologies. Autism Speaks subscribes to what is known as the 

Medical Model of Disability. In this case, it means that they see 

autism (and other disabilities) as a tragedy that needs to be cured 

or prevented in order to help Autistic people and their families. 

Hence, the organisation encourages prenatal screening of autism, 

potential cures for Autism and endorsement of controversial 

therapies. An example of these therapies is the Applied Behaviour 

Analysis which endeavours to make Autistic People ‘pass’ as 

being non-autistic. Furthermore, Autism Speaks have had 

association with the controversial Judge Rotenberg Centre (JRC) 

in Massachusetts, which is known for electro-shocking patients as 

a form of aversion therapy. The JRC has ignited a debate within 

the Autistic community regarding the ethics of Autism treatments 

in the US. 

On the other hand, many Autistic individuals, allies, 

and support groups, endorse Neurodiversity; a branch of the 

Social Model of Disability, specific to neurological conditions. 

This sees disabilities as an aspect of an individual’s identity 

and not necessarily as an aspect that is entirely negative. 

Furthermore, unlike the Medical Model, which focuses mainly 

on medical interventions to support disabled people, the Social 

Model of Disability not only emphasises non-abusive therapies 

and medical support, but also emphasises education and social 

change. Those that subscribe to the Social Model encourage 

therapies such as speech and occupational therapy, equipment 

for non-speaking autistic people and education and employment 

solutions. Unlike more invasive forms of therapy, these measures 

endeavour to allow Autistic people to have full accessibility into 

society whilst still acknowledging their differences. Rather than

making Autistic people fit a certain mould of normality, a culture 

of acceptance of difference is emphasised in order to better 

accommodate people with disabilities. 

Autism Speaks has also been subject to a series of 

controversies regarding its films, advertising and the nature of 

its campaigns. For instance, in 2009 the organisation run an 

advertisement called ‘I Am Autism’ which portrayed autism as a 

child-stealing, family ruining monster, claiming to be ‘visible in 

your children’ and ‘working faster than paediatric aids, cancer 

and diabetes combined’. Many people in the autism community 

denounced this advertisement as they claimed that demonising 

Autism doesn’t help Autistic people or their families. In 2006 

Autism Speaks also sponsored a short film titled ‘Autism Every 

Day’. This documentary style film featured a woman who, in 

the presence of her autistic child, tells the audience that she 

had thought of throwing her child off a bridge. This was an 

attempt to illustrate the lack of support afforded to parents of 

autistic children. As the killing of disabled children by parents 

or carers is a reoccurring issue, with recent cases including the 

death of London McCabe in November 2014, the short film was 

seen as overly sympathetic to those who kill disabled children. 

Unsurprisingly, many people in the community found it to be 

grossly insensitive. 

It’s unlikely that a broad populist movement that 

had taken over hash tags on twitter will destroy the empire 

that is Autism Speaks. Lobbying with governments, groups and 

corporations that support the organisation, will however, be 

effective in transcending the organisation. Furthermore, this sort 

of action taken against them will only be legitimised if there is a 

large shift in the perception of Autism and disability within the 

community. Unless Autism Speaks chooses to radically change 

its fundamental ideology, we could potentially witness smaller 

autism organisations become influenced by the ideologies 

advanced by Autism Speaks as many smaller organisations 

continue to perceive of it as a leader in the industry. 

This incident, however, could be a turning point for the 

Autism Rights Movement, particularly in educating bystanders 

about what Neurodiversity is and why they disapprove of Autism 

Speaks. This incident has received some media attention from 

widely read websites such as Buzzfeed and The Daily Beast, 

meaning that a larger audience can be more aware of this niche 

issue. Furthermore there is a misconception that Neurodiversity 

is only championed by ‘high functioning’ Autistic people, who do 

not understand what it is like to be severely disabled by Autism, 

nor what it is like to be a parent or carer of an Autistic person. 

Due to the accessibility of social media as a form of activism, this 

hash tag hijack displayed opinions of Autistic people with various 

experiences of the condition (such as non-verbal writer Amy 

Sequenzia), but also the opinions of parents and carers against 

Autism Speaks. Having such a diverse group of individuals, who 

are pro-Neurodiversity speaking out on Twitter, destroys this 

misconception. The question now is if this dissent online will 

turn into a larger movement against Autism Speaks and similar 

organisations in real life, and if it does, what this will mean for 

the sector. 

11

12 

Why we should be concerned when 

senior ministers 

attack public offices 

BY DR. ALICE DE JONGE 

Independent public office holders are an important part 

of modern democratic societies. Their task is to ensure 

accountability for abuses of power by government. Their capacity 

to perform this role depends on their independence and ability 

to act impartially. The Australian Human Rights Commission (the 

Commission) is one such institution. 

The Commonwealth law under which the Commission 

operates empowers it to ‘inquire into any act or practice that may 

be inconsistent with or contrary to any human right’. As former 

President of the Commission Professor Brian Burdekin has noted, 

the role of it ‘is to stand up for the most vulnerable and disadvantaged 

groups in our community: the homeless, the mentally ill, 

indigenous people, people with disabilities, children in detention.’ 

Particularly in circumstances where the judicial branch 

of government is unable to provide protection from abuses of 

power, ‘The things that the Human Rights Commission is obliged 

to do by law are directly related to those very vulnerable groups 

and its highest priorities have to be those who are least able to 

defend themselves’. 

Perhaps not surprisingly, when independent public 

office holders perform their duties properly and expose the 

human rights failings of government officers and/or institutions, 

they are not looked upon favorably by members of that government. 

Nor is Gillian Triggs the only President of the Commission 

to be placed under political pressure after exposing human rights 

abuses – Brian Burdekin, the very first President of the AHRC, also 

experienced such pressure. 

Independence and impartiality are undermined when 

senior politicians attack holders of public office; and even more 

so when sections of the media join the attack by presenting inaccurate 

accounts of the work of public institutions. 

By January 2015 it was becoming obvious that certain 

senior members of government were determined to cast the work 

of the Commission in as negative a light as possible. An opportunity 

to do so arose in relation to the case of John Basikbasik. In 

late November 2014, the Commission’s President found that the 

continued and indefinite detention since 2007 of Mr Basikbasik, 

a recognized refugee in the Villawood Immigration Detention 

Centre, was arbitrary. It therefore was a breach of Australia’s 

obligations under the 1966 International Covenant on Civil and 

Political Rights. 

Mr Basikbaik was a refugee who had resided in Australia 

since 1985 when, in 2000, he was convicted of the manslaughter 

of his de facto spouse and sentenced to seven years 

imprisonment. His Protection visa was cancelled in 2003. After 

Mr Basikbasik was released from prison in June 2007, he was 

detained at Villawood, where he remained in indefinite detention, 

despite having served his prison sentence. Returning Mr 

Basikbasik to Indonesia, a place where he would be a risk of 

persecution, would be a breach of Australia’s non-refoulement 

obligations under the Refugee Convention. 

In such cases, the Minister for Immigration and Border 

Protection has a range of options available. These include the 

power to specify alternative detention arrangements, such as 

community detention, if necessary with conditions and restrictions 

attached if to mitigate any perceived risks. The Minister, 

however, has declined to take any such option. Under international 

law, detention must be both necessary and proportionate 

to the aim of the detention in order to be lawful. In light of the 

alternative options for managing any risks posed to the community 

by Mr Basikbasik, the Commission concluded that holding 

him in indefinite detention in Villawood was neither necessary

13 

“Independence and impartiality are undermined 

when senior politicians attach holders of public 

office; and even more so when sections of the media 

join the attack by presenting innacurate accounts of 

the work of public institutions.” 

nor proportionate. Furthermore, due to the finding that between 

2007 and 2014 Mr Basikbasik had been held in arbitrary (and 

therefore unlawful) detention, the Commission’s President also 

recommended that he be paid compensation in the amount of 

$350,000 – an amount based upon similar amounts awarded in 

previous cases of illegal detention. 

The Basikbasik case was publicly labeled by the Prime 

Minister, Tony Abbott, as a ‘bizarre ruling’ and an ‘extremely 

questionable judgment’. Sections of the media screamed outrage 

at the idea that a ‘wife killer’ should ‘be released’ - and ‘with 

compensation’ to boot! Without, of course, bothering to point 

out that this was never what the Commission’s President had 

recommended at all. A less restrictive form of detention is not 

the same as ‘release’. 

Recommendations made by the Commission are not 

binding. The government rejected the recommendations made 

in the Basikbasik case, hence he remains in an immigration 

detention centre today. 

By this stage it was known that the Commission had 

completed its report into children in detention and had handed 

it to the government. It was also known the report was not going 

to cast Australia’s immigration detention practices in a good light 

when it would be made public in February. It was also obvious 

that the continued attacks on President Triggs were aimed at discrediting 

the Commission and its work prior to the Report being 

made public. And so it was that a group of 25 legal academics 

signed an open letter expressing support for President Triggs and 

their confidence in the work of the Commission. 

But neither the letter nor other expressions of support 

for the Commission coming from members of the legal profession 

proved sufficient in preventing the howls of outrage from the 

government when the Commission’s Forgotten Children Report 

was made public. The Prime Minister was quick to label the report 

as a ‘blatantly partisan political exercise’ and a ‘transparent 

stitch-up’. Neither the Prime Minister nor any other person has 

pointed to any errors in the Report, which includes a detailed, 

albeit disturbing, analysis of facts and figures taken from data 

held by the Government’s own Ministry. As Professor Ben 

Saul has noted, the Government’s response is not a reasonable 

and civilised disagreement about law and fact. Rather, it is a 

defensive political attack on the independence and integrity of a 

Commission doing its job – namely, calling out governments for 

breaching human rights law standards. 

Having drafted and circulated the first letter signed by 

academics, it was, for me, a case of ‘here we go again’. And when 

I began contacting human rights scholars at Monash and other 

Australian universities, it soon became clear that this sentiment 

was shared. As our second letter circulated for signatures, it also 

quickly became obvious that Gillian Triggs was widely respected 

for her intelligence and integrity, particularly amongst the many 

of use who have been her students and/or work colleagues 

over the years. Both Brian Burdekin and noted human rights 

advocate Julian Burnside QC joined the 50 or so legal academics 

in signing the second open letter. Other public figures and legal 

bodies, including former Prime Minister Malcolm Fraser, the 

Australian Bar Association and the Law Council of Australia, also 

spoke out publicly in support of the Commission, its President 

and its work. Finally, even the Senate decided to censure the 

Attorney General, George Brandis, for impugning, and even possibly 

undermining, the independence of the Commission and its 

President. 

The work of the Commission serves to protect the very 

essence of what makes us human – the mutual respect for the 

humanity of every man, woman and child. The human rights 

which the Commission serves to protect have been hard fought 

for over many centuries. We all need to cherish them and to 

preserve the respect and dignity of the institutions, including the 

Commission, which protect those rights. 

DR. ALICE DE JONGE IS A SENIOR LECTURER IN 

THE DEPARTMENT OF BUSINESS LAW & TAXATION 

AT THE MONASH BUSINESS SCHOOL.

14 

Age of entitlement or expectation 

of Government? 

BY HAREESH MAKAM 

‘Let me put it this way: the age of Entitlement is over’ Joe 

Hockey told the Institute of Economic Affairs in 2012. I struggle 

to understand what the current Treasurer of the Coalition 

government meant by this statement. This speech preceded his 

tough and controversial budget that followed after the Coalition 

won government in 2013. 

It is questionable as to whether our budget is actually 

facing a fiscal crisis. When you consider the current credit 

rating that prominent financial institutions and bodies have 

given us, our low level of debt compared with the rest of the 

OECD and of course the fact that our economy is growing at a 

healthy level, it is reasonable to say that Australia is not facing 

any form of financial crisis. Despite this, some economists have 

said that structural problems in our budget will have damaging 

ramifications in the future. Hence, there is a supposed need to 

stabilise government spending in order to bring the nation’s 

finances under control. 

But why does this comment; ‘ the age of entitlement 

is over’ sound strange? Today, citizens living within recognised 

states pay a percentage of their annual financial income to the 

government. In some socialist countries their effective tax rate for 

the highest income earners is over 50% of their income. In return, 

citizens receive essential services such as health, education, and 

a military, all of which can create a stable nation and state. 

Therefore, citizens in these states who pay a high level 

of tax each year are ‘entitled’ to a number of benefits, privileges 

and services. In this country, government revenue is close to 

$400 billion and over $40 billion is spent on essential services 

such as health and education. These services are integral to the 

operation of Australian society and allow the country to advance 

as a nation. This means that citizens are getting something in 

return from being slugged by the government each year to pay 

taxes. 

The government spends millions of dollars on welfare 

to help the less advantaged and lower classes find jobs and 

improve their financial situation. The government also spends 

billions of dollars to ensure that this country continues to stay 

‘open for business’. The theory of tax and government spending 

ensures that this process occurs in reality and suggests that 

people are ‘entitled’ to some sort of compensation for being 

financially worse off. 

In a capitalist economy, people earn an income by 

engaging in paid work. Some people earn millions a year and 

some earn $2 a day, but that’s just the reality of our economic 

system. Without a government body, social and economic 

inequality could become unsustainable and may have a 

detrimental effect on the country. The taxation system allows our 

politicians to create a more equal society. 

If we consider the above logic then we start to see a 

familiar economic pattern emerge in which citizens (the seller) 

gives the government (the buyer) a monetary contribution. In 

return, the buyer (the government) gives the seller (the people) 

essential services such as health, education, social security etc. 

So Joe, I accept that the current state of our budget is 

not sustainable. But your ‘age of entitlement’ rant does not make 

sense. This is because it’s non–existent; the process of giving and 

taking tax is similar to the fundamental feature of the common 

market – ‘buy and sell’. What makes the government different 

from all those buyers (in the economic market) who must provide 

their sellers with compensation within a monetary transaction? 

We shouldn’t say that the ‘age of entitlement’ is over but instead 

say that the ‘age of fiscal prudence is beginning’. 

HAREESH MAKAM IS A 

MEMBER OF THE LIBERAL PARTY

15 

The American higher education 

system told through TV 

BY MALI REA 

The Education Minister Chris Pyne has openly said he wants to 

emulate the American system of higher education, which we know 

has progressed into a situation where student debt is second only 

to credit card debt. Due to their privatised and deregulated system 

there is a two-tiered system where there are a few very expensive, 

well regarded universities which are inaccessible to the general 

population. Consequently, there exists a sea of underfunded 

institutions which are forced to lower the cost of degrees at the 

expense of teaching and learning quality. 

The inequality that exists around this system is deeply 

entrenched within American culture. The American ‘college’ is 

frequently depicted on television and film. Evidently Mr Pyne has 

spent more time watching American daytime television than reading 

public policy reports and analysis. Here are some things that he’s 

learnt from American TV. 

The Waltons 

While some generations can go to university, others will not. Although 

none of the Walton parents or grandparents went to university, most 

of the children do. This can be seen as a result of the introduction of 

mass higher education. 

Your ability to get into university will be based on where 

you went to school. Mary-Ellen had serious trouble getting in to 

nursing from the local country school despite her intelligence and 

ambition. Mary-Ellen even experiences institutionalised sexism when 

she attempts to enrol in a further medical degree because women 

don’t become doctors. This episode must have inspired Pyne’s belief 

that ‘they [women] will not be able to earn the high incomes’ because 

they apparently will only be ‘nurses and teachers’. 

Roseanne 

If you don’t have a ‘college fund’ and come from a family who cannot 

pay the electricity bills, you won’t be able to get into college and will 

have to go in to a community colllege. 

“So even if I get into these schools I can’t afford to go? 

What was I working for, what was the point of getting A’s? All this 

time you told me if I worked hard and got good grades I could make 

something of myself. (You still can). Yeah going to night school 

working at the buy and bag, I’m going to wind up just like you!” 

Daria 

You may have to send one of your children to ‘beauty school’ because 

it’s too expensive to send both children to college. 

You may also receive acceptance letters with small print that reads 

‘manatee college has no class but offers beachside accommodation 

at $10 000 per semester’. 

Universities will refer parents to family businesses because 

they can set you up with a cash loan. They sell candy, make loans, 

and haul trash; they have a lot of interests. 

We’re also shown that there is such thing as ‘campus 

police’ and that you will have to spend all of high school doing ‘extracurriculars 

for your college application’. 

If your uncle ‘donates a wing’ and you went to a private 

school, your grades are barely considered before being accepted. 

This highlights the issue that American universities rely on 

endowments, universities such as Harvard get up to 32 billion dollars 

in endowments a year. 

How I Met Your Mother 

Despite going to university, you will still have trouble with finding 

steady employment. There has been a lot of criticism in the last few 

years around massive students debts, as according to a poll by NBC 

News, 40% of 2011-2012 college graduates were underemployed in 

2013, and in serious debt from their student loans. 

We also learnt that your student debt is likely to stop you 

from being able to get a good interest rate on your home loan-unless 

you have a larger credit card debt. 

Gossip Girl 

If you go to an elite private school you’ll get good marks regardless of 

your work once you’re a senior. This relationship between elite private 

high schools and elite universities makes these far better funded 

universities entirely inaccessible for students not from these private 

high schools. 

We also learnt that at $46 000 a year, Brown is a ‘hippy 

school’. 

‘Second semester seniors get a free pass, Constance wants 

their students to get into the best colleges. That’s why this free pass 

exists. The headmistress, if she knew about this grade, she’d rap you 

on the wrist.’ 

Community 

Set in a community college, this show gives a good idea of the kind 

of prejudices surrounding community colleges. We are shown that 

people assume that you have stuffed something up in your life to 

have ended up in Community College. 

These kind of prejudices are rooted in the kind of classism that is 

exacerbated by a two-tiered system. We can trace the history of 

higher education in America, from the era of mass higher education 

in The Waltons to the effects of crippling debt in How I Met You 

Mother. Overtime we have witnessed the ideology behind government 

legislation and funding change. Whilst mass higher education was 

encouraged, in order to have a more educated population, in the past 

few decades this had changed to a belief that people go to university 

for individual gain, hence it being their responsibility to fund it. The 

current system in place in America is rooted in classism and prevents 

social mobility, through attitudes towards Ivy League schools in 

Gossip Girl and community colleges in Roseanne and Community. 

Come along to the Protest on March 25th to oppose the 

Americanisation of our education. Free buses will be leaving from 

Robert Blackwood Hall at 1pm on the day. 

For more information contact msa-education@monash.edu 

MALI REA IS THE 

EDUCATION (PUBLIC AFFAIRS) OFFICER

16 

Political donations 

BY TOM CLELLAND 

Imagine a self-governing town of one hundred people. 

The town needs, among other things, a leader, and so 

decides to hold elections every four years to determine 

who the head honcho will be. There is a catch, though; 

to enter the electoral race, a candidate needs money to 

run their campaign, and to stand a realistic chance they 

need a substantial amount (read: a shitload). The aspiring 

candidates, then, do the rounds in their town to raise 

money for the impending electoral race. Two of the more 

enterprising members of the community seize on this 

opportunity, and decide to offer an extremely large cash 

payment to Bill. Bill’s motivations in running for office are, 

for the sake of the argument, noble, and he accepts the 

payment knowing that this is the only way that he may 

secure office and help his town. Once elected, though, he 

realises that he is somewhat beholden to the wishes of 

his donors, and reluctantly approves the development of 

a casino in the centre of his small town to get them off his 

back. Bill tries to frame the casino as a necessary budgetary 

measure for the town, but it soon becomes clear that the 

casino (surprisingly) makes life a lot more miserable for the 

residents of this once-pure community. That’s not really 

kosher, right? 

On the 21st of January, 2011, Campbell Newman 

gave an impressive speech about Brisbane City Council’s 

decision to use green energy sources to power street lights. 

I say impressive because I have never seen an orator so 

accurately channel the essence of a block of wood in their 

delivery. He was quoted as saying that “it would be a great 

idea if rather than digging up huge piles of black stuff out of 

the ground a few hundred kilometres north of here to keep 

those lights on, perhaps it would be better in the long term 

for our children, our grandchildren and the generations to 

come that we set things up a bit differently”. The sentiments 

contained in his remarks were ostensibly noble, greenies all 

over Queensland were buzzed, and it looked like someone 

with a semblance of environmental conscience was flitting 

around the halls of the Queensland State Parliament. 18 

months later, however, and Campbell was in a war of words 

with UNESCO, who had warned that the Great Barrier Reef 

may be listed as ‘in danger’ if the wanton dumping of sludge 

didn’t stop some time in the general future. Obviously, 

this greatly offended the sensibilities of the Newman 

government, who fired back that Queensland was ‘in the 

coal business’, and that if people didn’t like that, they could 

shove it (I may be paraphrasing). I wish I could say that such 

a backflip was rare, but the starkly contrasting opinions 

should pique the curiosity of even the most apathetic 

observer. What happened to this man to lead him to so 

fundamentally shift his position on such a divisive issue? 

Some background is perhaps necessary. 

During their term, the Newman Government both raised 

the threshold for donations that must be declared, and 

proposed that the cap on the amount that may be donated 

to a political party be abolished. This year, an ICAC hearing 

was told that the price of a meeting with Campbell Newman 

was a $5000 contribution to his re-election fund, and it 

was revealed that three government ministers who were 

to debate the extension of the New Hope Group’s coal 

mine near Toowoomba were showered in lavish gifts by 

the mining conglomerate, including box seats at various 

sports events. A picture emerges from the smog. It is one 

of a government languishing in moral turpitude, where 

the interests served are those of corporations rather than 

citizens. It is not a unique situation in Australia. Between 

1995-1998, corporations donated $29 million to political 

parties in this country. In 2004-2005, the Labor party raised 

$64.8 million, while the Liberal Party raised $66 million. 

These amounts having continued to climb in recent years to 

levels without precedent. 

This piece is not aimed at the Newman 

government. The situation in Queensland is a microcosm 

of what is happening elsewhere in Australia, including our 

home state. I don’t claim to understand the ins and outs 

of political contribution regulation and legislation. I don’t 

claim to be an enlightened political thinker. I do, however, 

believe that the unregulated flow of money is warping 

and twisting the nature of our democracy so as to leave 

it unrecognisable. The appearance of political and quasipolitical 

figures such as Clive Palmer and Gina Rinehart 

on the national scene should be treated as a barometer, 

an indicator that all is not well in the Australian political 

landscape. Money should not, in and of itself, equal power 

in a pure representative democracy, and this seems to have 

been forgotten in the rush to dig up rocks and send them 

overseas.

Student 

Affairs 

Articles by Anna Schouten, 

Sabby Gill, Kristin Robertson & Julia 

Pillai, Monica Hunt, and Kirsti Weisz 


18 

Bring it on Melbourne! 

BY ANNA SCHOUTEN 

The experiences of an exchange student from The 

Netherlands at Monash University 

It wasn’t until I was half way through, reading ‘Dear first 

years…’ published in the first edition of Lot’s Wife 2015, that I 

realised the writer was joking with me. After laughing at myself 

during this stupid incident, I wondered whether I was the only 

student who experienced reading this article in that certain 

way. Veteran Monash students are probably making a joke of 

me right now, but how was I supposed to know? In this column, 

I – a Communications and Journalism exchange student 

from Utrecht University, in The Netherlands - am sharing my 

experiences of the first weeks at Monash University with you. 

Although I am in my third year of University back in The 

Netherlands, my first day at Monash University made me feel like 

a first year again. I changed my outfit about four times, before 

leaving my apartment – where I just moved in the day before. I 

double-checked the PTV-planner (yay for these kind of apps) and 

the classroom I had to go to. After I arrived (about 30 minutes 

too early, because by all means, I did not want to be late) I had 

a few awkward chats with other fellow first day ‘victims’, to kill 

some time. One hour on and I had already forgotten most of the 

names of the people I spoke to. Neither did I remember their 

place of births and what they are studying. I eased myself with 

the thought that they must have forgotten this information about 

me too. At least we will remember each other’s faces. Now, there 

are some people whom I can say ‘Hi!’ to, when I walk through the 

hallways during the first weeks of classes. 

One thing is clear: the Clayton Campus is huge in 

comparison to the campus of my home university in Utrecht. 

I am glad to hear that some of the natives I met still get lost 

sometimes. This means that I can use lateness as a valid excuse 

if I don’t arrive to class on time. Another thing that stands out 

is the fancy names of the streets; ‘Rainforest walk’ for instance, 

whoever thought of that? 

That students enjoy their time at Clayton Campus, 

is no surprise for me. There are so many activities going; I am 

sure that Monash students never get bored. Free ‘brekkie’ or a 

weekly ‘barbie’ (oh, how I love Australian slang) would never 

be something that happened at Utrecht University. In The 

Netherlands, you come to your campus to study, not to hang 

out with your friends. This is probably because the city centre in 

Utrecht is close to the campus, meaning that there are plenty of 

alternative places to relax outside of campus. At Monash it takes 

more time to arrive in the CBD, which means that students are 

more inclined to stay on campus during their breaks. 

That brings me to the following point: Melbourne, 

like Campus Centre, is also relatively enormous. Four million 

people in one city, it is hard to imagine for someone from a small 

country like The Netherlands. All of a sudden, Amsterdam, the 

capital city of The Netherlands with less than a million habitants, 

begins to look like a tiny village. As an exchange student in 

Melbourne, I feel at home, because there are so many different 

nationalities in this multi-cultural city. I am not the only one 

who is from overseas here, which sometimes makes me feel a 

little more comfortable. Australians are probably the kindest 

people I have ever met – no, this is not to flatter you, I am being 

serious. When I am looking lost, strangers will approach me to 

ask whether I need directions and repeat their instructions three 

times in a row if necessary. I love the fact that Australians are so 

helpful – I truly believe it is something that Dutch people can 

learn from. 

Kindness also appeared when I was talking to native 

students and lecturers during the first week of classes. They 

waited patiently when I needed some time to think about the 

way to formulate a sentence, for example. I was also really happy 

when my tutors reassured me that it would not be any problem 

to help me out with academic writing in English. Writing in a 

language other than that which I am familiar with is something I 

am quite insecure about at this stage. 

After the first week of classes, I can tell that the level of 

an Arts undergraduate study at Monash University is comparable 

to the level of Utrecht University, and that the assignments are 

equal at both universities: doing readings and thinking about 

deep thoughts on that subject are very much central at both 

institutions. The biggest difference I have experienced so far, has 

to do with the Australian perspective on life, which I am only now 

beginning to learn about for the first time. In The Netherlands, I 

mostly learn about Great Britain or the USA. I am curious about 

what Australian culture will teach me. Bring it on!

19 

“I love the fact that 

Australians are so 

helpful – I truly believe 

it is something that 

Dutch people can learn 

from.” 

UTRECHT UNIVERSITY

20 

One World 

Festival 

BY SABBY GILL 

The first thing that people notice when they come to Australia 

is the diverse culture and the many different faces that they 

encounter. Perhaps that’s the beauty of this country; the dazzling 

natural landscape on display, combined with our cultural 

differences, creates a beautiful masterpiece that is accepting 

and welcoming to everyone. This masterpiece is on display at the 

moment, at our very own Monash University run event. 

What amazing event is this you ask? It’s the One World 

Festival, of course! 

The One World Festival, which is jointly organized 

by Monash University International Students Service (MUISS), 

Campus Community Division, Team Monash and Monash Abroad 

aims at celebrating and embracing the existence of its rich 

cultural diversity. 

Every year, the One World Festival gets bigger and 

better, and this year is not an exception. Over three days, this 

festival will definitely encourage you to plunge into a plethora of 

cultures and embrace what it is like to be a ‘citizen of the world’ 

in its true sense. Last year, about 26 cultural clubs at Monash 

participated in the festival. 

This year, the cultural societies and clubs of Monash 

have heaps of activities planned from the 14th to the 16th of 

April. Monash University has always been proud of its alliances 

with universities around the world and has therefore acquired 

the status of being a ‘Global University.’ As a part of celebrating 

these relations with our foreign partners, an ‘Exchange Fair’ will 

be held on the 15th of April. Representatives from the partner 

universities abroad will be able to pay our campus a visit, which 

is also a wonderful opportunity to get chatting to exchange 

students from around the globe. 

No festival is complete without food, right? Well, don’t 

worry because we have it covered. Look forward to getting a 

taste of street foods from around the globe; whether it be the 

famous ‘chaat’ from India, or the classic original dumplings from 

China. So come on down to indulge into a gastronomical fantasy. 

Imagine, sitting under the light of the stars and the moon, the 

cool evening breeze whistling past you whilst immersing yourself 

in an amazing cinematic experience. Brace yourselves and get 

your popcorn ready, because the One World Festival is bringing 

to you the ‘Moonlight Cinema’. True to its name, it’s a chance for 

you to catch a movie with your friends in the classic old way. The 

Moonlight Cinema will be held on Thursday night the 16th April 

and will screen of some great foreign classics that you’ll never 

regret watching. 

However, the fun doesn’t end there. ‘One night around 

the globe’ is an international student themed party, where you 

can explore the world beyond your cultural barriers. There’s 

nothing better than talking about striking differences between 

cultures, practices and traditions over a couple of drinks and 

some appetizing food. 

A festival like this which enjoys diversity and 

appreciates differences could indeed bring out the best in people 

and create beautiful moments. Capture these moments on your 

camera, and you could have your photos recognized throughout 

the Monash Community, by getting it featured on the ‘Humans 

of Monash’ page that recognizes the beauty that lies in everyday 

moments on campus. All you have to do is upload any pictures 

taken by you during the One World Festival on Instagram and 

Facebook under the hashtag #oneworldfestival, and if the panel 

of selectors think your picture is worth it, you get a special 

mention and a chance to win some exciting prizes. 

The One World Festival is also an amazing platform to 

showcase your talents. Participation in the One World Festival 

is open to any individual or group willing to participate. If you 

reckon you can perform and entertain, submit an expression 

of interest to any of the participating Monash clubs or MUISS. 

Financial assistance will also be provided to selected performers 

if needed. 

So, look forward to having an amazing three day journey as 

you travel around the globe at Monash University, no tickets or 

passports needed. All you need is enthusiasm and willingness to 

soak it all in and make the most out of the enthralling cultural 

outpouring at your very own Monash Campus. 

SABBY GILL IS A MONASH UNIVERSITY 

INTERNATIONAL STUDENT SOCIETY’S 

PUBLICATIONS GENERAL COMMITTEE MEMBER

22 

CLUBS WORTH A SCOPE 

BY KRISTIN ROBERTSON AND JULIA PILLAI 

STEW: Students Teaching 

English to our World 

Migrants and Refugees in Australia have found some 

much needed help from this club who continue to 

volunteer to teach them the basics of English. Not only 

does this club offer much needed assistance for their 

everyday lives, but volunteers themselves can gain some 

beneficial teaching experience too. If you are interested 

in volunteering, for a few hours a week, you can become 

a tutor that is mentally and culturally prepared to make a 

difference in the lives of others and in your own. 

MCJAF: Monash Club of 

Juggling and Fire Twirling 

After 11 years on campus, MCJAF continues to theatrically 

teach and entertain with fire-filled tricks and skilful displays 

that including juggling, uni-cycling, diablo, spinning plates 

and so much more. Beyond building impressive skills, this 

club promises thrilling social events including outings to 

the circus, flying trapeze and BOUNCEinc as well as number 

of camps. They teach from beginners to advanced, with 

the chance to show off your skills at their variety show next 

semester. 

mcjaf@monashclubs.org or Facebook 

stew@monashclubs.org or Facebook 

Progressive Law Network 

Linguistic Society 

(LingSoc) 

If you love free pizza and punny Thesaurus jokes this is 

the club for you! 

With a focus on the social side of linguistics, they have 

fortnightly board game parties and plan to cash in on 

Australia’s acceptance into Eurovision by creating a mega 

social event along with other cultural clubs. These word 

nerds are also hosting a Q/A this semester with Monash’s 

Chair of Linguists, Kate Burridge, to discuss how to use 

linguistics beyond university. 

After about 5 years on campus, this club has created an 

outlet for students interested in law and social justice 

without the need to be enrolled as a law student. This 

club is open to anyone interested in law, politics and 

human rights, who want to use the law for social change 

and is a great way to network with other students looking 

into this sector. Members are offered the opportunity to 

attend law and political seminars that, this year, include 

Monash’s Patrick Emerton and Kate Seear to discuss the 

thought-provoking connection between law, politics and 

our society. 

progressivelawnetwork@gmail.com, www. progressivelawnetwork.org.au 

or Facebook 

lingsoc@monashclubs.org or Facebook 

Gleam: Gay and Lesbian 

Engineers at Monash 

After 4 years on campus this supportive group still accepts 

anyone who is interested in engineering, while they target 

Monash’s gay and lesbian community they still label 

themselves as an all-inclusive engineering society. They 

have a blend of social and network events to create a caring 

environment for like-minded people to discuss science and 

make friends. Their social events include pizza lunches, 

picnics and bar nights, as well as industry nights. They are 

also keen to link students to support services where needed. 

Monash University 

Fencing Club 

Ranking in top spots in Australia for Uni Games, this group 

of swashbucklers welcome anyone interested in the sport, 

including beginners. It’s the cheaper alternative to other 

fencing clubs in Victoria that practices with sabres, foils 

and epees. This sporting club is also involved in social 

fundraising and community based events throughout the 

semester. They offer classes 5 nights a week in different 

weapons so you will certainly be able to fit it into your busy 

student schedule. 

monashfencingclub@gmail.com or Facebook 

gleam@monashclubs.org or Facebook

23 

CLUBS WORTH A SCOPE 

MASSA: The Monash African 

Students’ Assoaication 

With this being the only club on campus to represent 

an entire continent, MASSA’s wide variety of cultural 

experiences from all around Africa means it has 

something for everyone. In amongst their cultural and 

social events, MASSA also takes part in successful social 

activism; having raised $1883 last year for Islamic relief for 

Syrian youths within one day on campus. So whether you 

are longing to get in touch with your African heritage or 

have a passion for humanitarianism this welcoming club 

is well worth a look. 

MJC: Japanese Club, Monash 

If you are interested in Japanese culture, or simply just 

socialising with others over a good meal, this club has 

both aspects covered. MJC have a social calendar loaded 

with all the quintessential aspects of Japanese culture; 

from origami, sushi and calligraphy to karaoke, karate and 

a trip to the Peninsula Hot Springs. Being able to speak 

Japanese is not required although “conversation classes” 

are being offered this year. 

monashjapaneseclub@gmail.com or Facebook 

african@monashclubs.org , www.massastudents.org.au or Facebook 

Monash University 

Philharmonic Society 

The Monash Phil is driven by a love of music and a desire 

to meet like-minded people. With 3 ensembles; Jazz band, 

concert band and orchestra, the Phil welcomes a variety 

of players and musical styles. They are less formal than 

the Monash Academy Orchestra and socialising, with 

events like trivia and game nights, music camps as well as 

a charity concert that feeds into youth and music causes. 

Can’t play an instrument? You are still welcome to join as 

a “flop”: a Friend and Lover Of the Phil, which allows you 

access to all social their social events and discount tickets 

to their shows. 

MAC: Monash Autistic 

Collective 

Whether you are on the autism spectrum or are friends 

or family with someone on the autism spectrum MAC 

allows a safe haven to socialise and network while ed and 

creating awareness with its social events, campaigns and 

meetings. They have weekly events on Thursdays, as well 

as larger events. MAC also welcomes those with other 

neurodiverse conditions such as ADD, ADHD, Dyslexia, 

Turrets and other neuro-diverse conditions. 

https://www.facebook.com/groups/MonashAutisticCollective 

philharmonic@monashclubs.org , www.monashphil.org or Facebook 

Ultimate Frisbee 

After 7 years on campus, this sporting team boasts a great 

chance to socialise with other students as well as being a 

platform for truly good sportsmanship. In amongst trivia 

nights and potluck dinners, their social league offers free 

coaching and equipment each Wednesday which welcomes 

even the most inexperienced beginners. With Ultimate 

Frisbee being a self-refereed sport the spirit of sportsmanship 

is an essential quality for all who want to get involved. 

monashultimatefrisbee@gmail.com or Facebook 

Wom*n of colour collective 

An autonomous group for those who have either been 

treated as outsiders, humiliated for our differences, 

exoticised, or taught to feel ashamed of ourselves and our 

respective culture. They run a mixture of social events and 

political campaigns. We start the year with a mix-tape party, 

which involves delicious food and listening to awesome 

music by Women of Colour. In the past they have organised 

workshops on various topics ranging from beauty standards 

to cultural appropriation. Last year, they launched the 

‘I,Too,Am Monash’ campaign - a photo campaign working 

closely with the MSA Indigenous Department that aims 

to address the devaluation and micro-aggression felt by 

students from racially different backgrounds on campus. 

Every women of colour will have a different reason to join 

this collective. The WoC Collective is for those who want to 

share, discuss their experiences, as well as challenge and 

learn from each other. 

https://www.facebook.com/MonashWomenOfColour

24 

Lot’s Wife Top Four: UNITS 

BY STUDENT AFFAIRS TEAM 

Are you short a unit? Are you contemplating asking the 

void of Monash StalkerSpace what is the best, ‘bludge-y’ 

unit that you should take to propel you to HD-dom? Fear 

not! Lot’s Wife has specially selected the best four units 

for you! 

LYF2357: Intermediate Life Skills 

Living on a $10 budget? Tired of eating cereal and mi goreng for 

breakfast, lunch and dinner? Need to learn some life hacks…that 

actually work. Like how to turn you instant beef noodles into an 

authentic style pho noodle soup? If you want to not only survive 

university, but also survive in the big scary world, this is the unit for 

you. Students will learn how to avoid scurvy and rickets by eating at 

least a vegetable a week, and attempting to occasionally go out in the 

sun. 

To be considered for this unit you must prove you are a student of true 

grit by not living with your parents. Life hacks are of no use to those 

who have never tried to shower next to an exposed water heater while 

wondering how much of your RDI you can get out of a beer? 

MED4783: Advanced Student Media 

Ah, student media, the life-blood of university culture. No we aren’t 

saying that because we’re Lot’s Wife. Students will learn how to do 

incredible things in tiny deadlines. Students will master the art of 

live tweeting all events, from MSC to daily activities like drinking tea. 

Students will learn how to accurately proofread while still maintaining 

the student media norm of having at least one glaring typo in every 

edition. Students will also learn fatigue management for use while 

waiting for your first letter to the editor to come in. 

CRY3205: Navigating University 

Bureaucracy 

University bureaucracy is more university bore-o-cracy, however, 

regardless of what you are studying, an advanced understanding 

of mind-numbingly illogical and robotic bureaucracy is absolutely 

essential in getting a degree. It’s more important than, um, actual 

studying. Students will learn how to apply for scholarships, special 

consideration, financial support, and disability services. Students 

will master the arts of document signing, form filling and crawling in 

a ball, sobbing uncontrollably, while contemplating dropping out, to 

become a busker. 

HCK9919: Advanced Professional Student 

Politics 

(HONOURS, THOUGH THERE IS NO 

HONOUR IN STUDPOL) 

Do you see student politics as more than simply a way to get 

experience in leadership through advocating student rights? Do you 

see student politics as an entity of its own, rather than a watered 

down ‘baby’ version of so-called ‘actual’ politics. Do you believe 

that the proletariat revolution will be delivered by a vanguard of 

white, middle class, private school educated, arts students who call 

themselves Marxists? If you do, this unit is for you. 

Students will first take a “Sorting Hack” test, where they 

will be sorted into factions. Once sorted into factions, you will learn 

about intricate inner workings of the MSA Students will then learn 

how to defer their degrees for decades at a time in order for them to 

spend more effort working on what is really important; the revolution. 

Finally, students will learn variety of ways to ‘Fuck Tony Abbott’ in 

multiple positions. 

ILLUSTRATION BY MONICA HUNT

25 

Uni students misusing 

prescription drugs 

BY KIRSTI WEISZ 

Uni’s back and while there is an air of excitement parading across 

campus, there’s also an undercurrent of anticipated stress. Amid 

studying, working and socialising, uni life can be equally exciting 

and stressful. 

Striking that work-study-life balance is difficult, if not 

impossible. To stay awake during those three hour lectures or 

to get through the fifty plus pages in the weekly reading guide, 

students often turn to one of the many coffee shops available 

on campus. But a new study is investigating whether Australian 

university students are also misusing prescription drugs and 

stimulants to enhance academic performance. 

The new survey titled “Non-medical use of prescription 

stimulants by Australian university students” is currently being 

commissioned by the National Drug & Alcohol Research Centre 

(NDARC). It will mainly examine attitudes, prevalence, patterns 

and consequences of use and motivations for non-medical use. 

Prescription drug misuse, the focus of the survey, 

occurs when someone takes medication prescribed for someone 

else or is not taking their own prescription in the way 

recommended by a doctor. Commonly misused 

substances include modafinil, prescription 

stimulants like methylphenidate, 

supplements, relaxants and caffeine. 

Dr Sharlene Kaye, senior 

lecturer and project member, says 

the survey will examine the study 

habits and health related behaviours 

to determine if students are misusing 

substances such as caffeine, drugs and 

prescription medication. 

“We’re looking at the 

prevalence of the use of these things to 

help with study… so when students report 

that they’ve used x, y and z, then we’ll look at any 

negative effects and the motivation for the use,” Dr 

Kaye says. 

Whether this is a widespread issue in Australia is still 

unclear so the survey aims to determine the extent to which this is 

affecting university students. 

“There’s been a lot of media-hype about enhancing 

academic performance, particularly in the US, and we really don’t 

know what the prevalence of that is here. So it’s more trying to 

get an estimate of what it is or whether it is happening here in 

Australian universities and then the extent of the… behaviour,” Dr 

Kaye says. 

A 2013 pilot project examining how Australian university 

students use such substances reported that a higher than 

expected number of university students in Australia were using 

drugs to improve academic performance or to stay awake. The 

“A new study is 

investigating whether 

Australian university students 

are also misusing prescription 

drugs and stimulants 

to enhance academic 

performance.” 

results also showed that it might be higher than the average 

misuse reported in the US. 

The pilot project surveyed more than 1700 students 

across four universities and found that students rated their drug 

use in terms of the effect, like improved concentration rather than 

the outcome, being to improve their grades. 

The main substances taken to improve marks were 

cognitive enhancements at over 40 per cent, prescription 

amphetamines at about 30 per cent and supplements at less than 

14 per cent. Similarly, substances used to stay awake included 

caffeine at just over 83 per cent, cognitive enhancements at about 

75 per cent and prescription amphetamines at around 54 per cent. 

Dr Jason Mazanov, the leader of the pilot project, says the “real 

surprise packet” was the use of Ritalin, which is commonly used 

for ADHD. 

The pilot project demonstrated the need for further 

evidence and encouraged consideration of whether this issue 

should be dealt with as one of health or one of legalistic 

prohibitions where misuse of prescription drugs is construed as 

‘cheating’. 

Dr Mazanov says some of the main reasons 

students misuse prescription drugs is to improve 

focus and concentration or to stay awake so 

they can win a scholarship or improve their 

grades. 

“While it is concerning that 

medicine and law seem to be at higher risk, 

people across different faculties are trying 

to enhance concentration and focus with 

some kind of substance,” he says. 

“It seems to be self-medicating fatigue.” Dr 

Mazanov warns about the dangers of using 

such serious drugs incorrectly and suggested that 

students seek medical advice. 

“People will rob from sleep to pay for everything else,” 

he says. He also highlighted long-term repercussions of this 

tendency, saying that students may take these practices into the 

workforce. 

“Students learn their professional culture when they are 

at university. What happens if they take these drugs into practice? 

What does this mean in terms of regulation for these types of 

substances?” he says. 

Interestingly, there is no evidence to suggest that using 

these substances does improve performance. It may provide a 

placebo effect where the student feels they are studying better, 

according to Dr Mazanov. 

Monash University has been approached to participate 

in the survey which will hopefully be up and running in the next 

few weeks. The completion date for the study is March 2016.

26

27 

PHOTOGRAPHY BY CARINA FLOREA

Science & 

Engineering 

Articles by Alisoun Townsend, 

Timothy Newport, Rachel Brasse and 

Rubee Dano 

ILLUSTRATION BY CEITIDH HOPPER

29 

The forest in the trees 

BY ALISOUN TOWNSEND 

Days before the caretaker period of the November state election 

of 2014, Victoria’s commercial logging business (VicForests) was 

handed the state’s western forests on a plate. Prior to this there 

was minimal logging in this part of Victoria and what did occur 

was under the direct government supervision. This expansion 

of VicForests’ logging comes on the back of community 

campaigning for sustainable forestry practise and an Auditor- 

General’s report that showed management of State Forests was 

a farce. 

Many communities in country Victoria are rightfully 

angry about VicForests’ native timber logging practises, such as 

seed tree logging and clear felling. 

The practise of using seed trees seems like it should 

work. Land is cleared with a few trees left to produce seeds. 

Tough Australian trees often have this beautiful adaptation that 

requires fire to crack open the seed capsules and allow seedlings 

to grow. This means seed tree style logging needs fire to produce 

seedlings of trees VicForests would be able to fell in the future. 

Australia’s climate and other factors has meant that 

controlled burning of seed tree logging coups do not always 

work. Logging trucks can only carry straight logs. Others are left 

near or on the logged coup. Approximately 16% of wood is left on 

the forest floor as waste. 

Exacerbated by the 2007 drought and an excess of dry 

timber, regeneration of one coup in the Strathbogie Ranges can 

only be described as a miserable failure. The seed trees and the 

seedbed that should have been created were killed when a fire 

burned far too hot through the dried timber left over from the 

logging. Coupled with the rapid establishment of pioneer species 

like wattle and tea tree, any slower growing eucalypt that might 

have survived the hot fires was choked out leaving now, 10 years 

later, a paddock of weeds scarring the beautiful landscape. 

VicForests is an interesting company. Forest harvesting 

supports many families in the hardwood and softwood timber 

plantations. But there are fewer jobs in the native timber 

industry due to dropping demand for this wood. In the minds 

of some people, VicForests somehow manages to hold onto the 

persona of a company that makes money selling good native 

Australian timber for furniture all over the world. Few people 

realise that the vast majority of the native wood VicForests 

harvests goes straight into the chipper. These wood chips are 

used to heat greenhouses and to produce paper, notably the 

Reflex brand. 

Somehow these wood chips are construed as a 

sustainable and ‘green’ energy resource. The rules of what 

constitutes a ‘green’ energy resource are iffy at best. Yes, trees 

can regrow, but the habitats of animals are often completely 

changed. The state emblem of Victoria, the leadbeater’s possum, 

is endangered and could be extinct by 2020. It lives in pockets 

of forest in the Central Highlands north east of Melbourne. 

The possum’s habitat, as well as the homes of the endangered 

spotted quoll, is being trashed by VicForests for native wood 

that will primarily be used for wood chips. Although there are 

other legal definitions of habitat for the leadbeater’s possum, 

it’s not a sustainable option for VicForests to log in areas where 

endangered animals are sighted and known to live. 

VicForests is also an unsustainable company. When a 

contract to South East Fibre Exports was dropped by the Eden 

based and Japanese owned woodchip company, VicForests 

began to consider selling native timber as firewood, chipboard 

or for bioenergy production, which is simply the act of burning 

wood instead of coal to produce energy. It is bizarre to see a state 

funded company investing money into the firewood industry. 

Also the thought of using native wood for energy production 

causes a lot of people to be rightfully nervous. Is this the back 

up plan the government has for when coal and gas becomes too 

expensive to produce Australia’s energy? 

An Australian company, Brickworks, recently secured 

a 20-year contract with VicForests for wood chips via the Federal 

government’s Direct Action Plan, an oddly named emission 

reduction program. It is interesting to note the managing director 

of Brickworks, Lindsay Partridge, is a well-known Liberal Party 

donor. Brickworks refer to native timber as a renewable resource, 

and thus ignore the notion of sustainability of supply. 

An investigation into VicForests’ logging practice, 

environmental impact and commercial viability needs to happen. 

The new Labor government may be bowing to pressure from 

Unions, but communities all through the Central Highlands and 

elsewhere continue to campaign for a Victoria Environmental 

Assessment Council (VEAC) audit into VicForests. It is only if our 

forests are managed sustainably that the jobs of people who 

work in the forests will be sustainable.

30 

Absolutely 100% true 

science facts! 

BY TIMOTHY NEWPORT 

Houseflies always buzz in 

the F key. 

If you say ‘hot as balls’, you 

mean it’s probably about 

32.3 degrees Celsius. 

About 65 billion neutrinos will pass 

through your fingernail in a second 

If you drove your car 

straight up you’d get to space 

in about an hour 

An ostrich roars sounds 

like that of a lion’s. 

The atmosphere on Titan is too 

thick for humans to fly in. 

A medium-sized cumulus 

cloud weighs about the same 

as 80 elephants. 

The giant squid’s brain is 

doughnut shaped. 

A pig’s orgasm lasts for 30 

minutes. 

DISCLAIMER: THE ARTIST HAS NEVER SEEN AN OSTRICH, ELEPHANT, SQUID OR PIG.

31 

Should Australia legalise the 

‘three parent baby’ technique? 

BY RACHEL BRASSE 

The UK has become the first country in the world to legalise 

the use of the ‘three parent baby’ technique in a bid to prevent 

mitochondrial diseases. What exactly does this mean, and should 

Australia follow suit? 

A technique recently legalised in the UK will result in the 

birth of children each with three biological parents. This 

may sound a little far-fetched, but this historic decision 

may help save countless lives every year. Although 

people fear that this may lead us down the path of 

designer babies, Australian Mitochondrial Disease 

Foundation CEO Sean Murray says this is an “unrealistic 

comparison”. 

As many of you know, mitochondria are often 

referred to as the powerhouse of the cell. What some 

of you may not know is that mitochondria are the only 

part of the cell (apart from the nucleus) to have its 

own DNA. This is thought to be because mitochondria 

may have been - once upon a time - independent 

bacteria. Also, unlike nuclear DNA (which gives us our 

genetic traits), mitochondria are passed down almost 

exclusively from the mother. The bad news is that if a 

woman carries defective mitochondria, she is at a high 

risk of conceiving a child with the same condition. 

Since mitochondria are responsible for 

converting our food into 90% of our body’s usable 

energy, mitochondrial diseases can cause an array of 

symptoms. The condition causes the most damage to 

areas of the body that demand the most energy, such 

as the brain, heart, muscles, liver, inner ear and eye. In 

mild cases, the sufferer may simply require more rest; 

but more severe cases may result in defects including 

blindness and deafness as well as the inability to walk, 

eat or talk. Some cases can also be life threatening, as 

the cells of vital organs are unable to get the energy 

required for normal function. 

Two ‘three parent baby’ techniques exist, 

although they both work through IVF conception. 

The first begins by removing the nucleus of both the 

mother’s and the donor’s egg cells. Then, the mother’s 

nucleus (and therefore her genetic material) is inserted 

into the donor’s egg cell, which contains healthy 

mitochondria. The donor’s egg is then fertilised as 

usual, resulting in the embryo inheriting only 0.054% of 

its overall DNA from the donor. The second works at the 

embryonic stage where the nuclei are exchanged after 

both eggs have been fertilised. 

As mitochondrial DNA is not responsible for 

the inheritance of traits, none of the child’s traits will 

come from the donor. Also, as the nuclear DNA of both 

parents remains unaltered during the procedure, the 

child is in no way artificially ‘designed’. 

According to the Australian Mitochondrial 

Disease Foundation (AMDF) fact sheet, it is estimated 

that one Australian child is born with the potential to 

develop a severe form of mitochondrial disease each 

week. This equates to around 50 births each year - 

and these are only the statistics for the severe to lifethreatening 

cases. Research shows that one in 200 

Australians may carry the defective gene, which may 

cause symptoms at any point in a person’s life. To 

make matters worse, there are few treatments available 

and currently no known cure. This is why prevention 

is key. Using this technique, women with defective 

mitochondria will be able to have biological children 

without the fear of passing their condition on.

32 

Artificial Intelligence: 

How smart are computers? 

An interview with PhD student Nader Chmait 

BY RUBEE DANO 

What is intelligence, and how do we measure it? With the last 20 

years bringing us massive advancements in the development 

of artificial intelligence, or AI, it is becoming increasingly more 

difficult to measure the intelligence of both humans and 

machines in a definitive way, let alone compare them. 

The Anytime Universal Intelligence test is a measure 

for the intelligence of any being, animal or computer. It provides 

an answer, between -1 and 1, based on the subject’s ability 

to respond to increasingly difficult tasks, such as recognising 

patterns in a punishment/reward kind of setting. To find out 

more about the Anytime Universal Intelligence Test, I went to the 

IT faculty to speak to Nader Chmait, a PhD student who uses the 

test in his research. 

First of all, let’s 

define what is meant by 

intelligence. Nader explains, 

that for the purposes of 

the test, intelligence is an 

approximation of an organism 

or object’sperformance in 

different environments, under 

different levels of complexity. 

In the AUI test, in each 

environment the test subject 

must take observations and 

respond to the test. Intelligence 

is measured as how well one 

responds to a punishment/ 

reward conditioning system. 

Essentially, if you can learn 

patterns in this kind of system, you should do well on the test. 

Nader uses the test to measure the abilities of various 

computer programs, or algorithms. He wants to see if these 

computer programs have the ability to learn. The algorithms that 

Nader works with are designed to take an action as a response 

to an observation. In doing this, the question asked is whether or 

not they will learn to predict the right response and come to the 

best solution to a problem, based on the recurrence of patterns 

and observations. 

You could argue that there are many different kinds 

of intelligence, from academic intelligence to emotional 

intelligence, to creativity. In the AUI test Nader defines 

intelligence as the ability of the subject to perform at a task that 

involves learned responses to negative and positive outcomes. 

The subject’s main goal in the test is to continue with minimal 

harm, avoiding bad consequences while seeking good ones. A 

person or computer that can learn which responses will most 

likely give a positive outcome will do best on the test. 

As we develop smarter machines and smarter 

programs, measuring their intelligence becomes increasingly 

important for further development, says Nader. It allows us to 

see exactly where we are at, and what our machines are capable 

of. AI as a concept has been around since Alan Turing’s day. 

The Turing test was the first test of this kind, and Turing himself 

did much for the early world of computing. The Turing test, 

developed in 1950, tries to determine if a machine’s intelligence 

is indistinguishable from a human’s, in essence. 

Nader says that, in the world of AI, there is a concept 

called the singularity, which refers to the point at which 

computers will overtake human intellect, and consequently 

they will no longer need us. He says that AI is set to develop 

exponentially in the next hundred 

years, though when exactly we 

will be eclipsed by machines is 

totally subjective. There’s a lot of 

debate in the IT world about when, 

or if the singularity will become a 

reality, with many different sides to 

the debate. There are many ways 

in which we outshine computers, 

Nader says, using body language 

and emotional recognition as an 

example. He believes that one day, 

computers might be developed 

to respond to these social cues, 

but at the moment they are not 

adept to do so. On the other hand, 

computers have adapted well 

to the logical reasoning aspects of intelligence. For instance, 

computers are now used to assist high level chess players in 

training, as they play at the equivalent level to a Grandmaster. 

As for where we’ll be in the future, Nader says he’s 

not sure, but he knows that with the progress we’ve made in 

the past two decades, and the progress we’re making now, that 

we’re always improving our knowledge of computers and AI. 

Maybe we’ll have computers that are smarter than us, maybe 

they’ll even be conscious beings one day. It’s an ongoing debate, 

however it’s one that will definitely be aided by the Anytime 

Universal Intelligence Test. 

IF YOU ARE A PHD STUDENT AND WOULD 

LIKE LOT’S WIFE TO WRITE ABOUT YOUR 

RESEARCH, PLEASE CONTACT 

jarrod.verity@monash.edu 

OR CALL 9905 8174

33 

Internships 

Look out for more opportunities online, March/April are the months most 

internship programs open. Winter Research Scholarships at Monash open in 

May 2015.

34 

Sustainability at 

Monash 

BY RACHEL BRASSE 

Monash definitely talks the talk when it comes to 

sustainability, but do they walk the walk? Big organisations 

tend to spend more time and money in claiming to be 

green than in implementing practices that minimise their 

environmental impact. With such a big science community 

at the university, one would expect pretty innovative and 

genuine approaches to climate change from Monash. 

In 2007, the university signed ULSF’s 

(Association of University Leaders for a Sustainable 

Future) Talloires Declaration. Basically, this means they 

pledged to do as much research and educate as many 

people about sustainability as possible. Since then, the 

university has funded environmental improvements, 

projects and compliance programs as well as run 

hundreds of sustainability workshops and seminars. With 

initiatives like the ride to uni day, the bikeshare program 

and the carpooling system, Monash reduced its unleaded 

transport-related CO2 emissions by over 40% between 

2009 and 2013. In fact, transport only accounted for 1% 

of Monash’s total CO2 emissions in 2013. In addition, with 

programs such as the ‘bin there, done that’ program, 

Monash generated 214 tonnes less waste than in 2010. 

In alignment with the university’s pledge to 

educate people about sustainability, Monash utilised 

social media to engage students. The ‘connect with your 

environment’ Facebook campaign increased from 3,770 

likes in 2013 to 9,387 this year. Since its creation, the page 

has raised $19,280 for on-campus renewable energy by 

donating $5 for each like received. As an additional mode 

of traffic generation onto the page, the Monash Office of 

Environmental Sustainability ran a scavenger hunt with 

a bike as the grand prize. This also offered extra initiative 

to bike ride around uni which many thought was a good 

idea. Whether this increase in traffic is a testament to 

Monash’s continuous efforts to raise awareness about the 

environment or simply to our generation’s heightened 

awareness on the subject, it definitely indicates a step in 

the right direction. Students were also involved through 

Environmental Sustainability staff members’ range of 

lectures on the subject of sustainability as well as studentrun 

events such as Earth Hour, Clean Up Australia Day and 

the Race for Sustainability. 

The Campus Centre’s 416 solar panels generate 

around 100,000 kWh of electricity per year – equivalent to 

30 households’ annual consumption. The reflective paint 

on the Deakin Hall’s roof provides emission-free cooling 

during the warmer months and the solar hot water heating 

at the Hockey Pavilion provides around 80% of the hot 

water used by the building throughout the year. With these 

infrastructural changes, our campus was able to decrease 

its electricity usage by 2.1%. 

Disappointingly however, our campus also 

increased its gas consumption by 4.7% in the same 

timeframe. It seems that despite the slogan ‘greening up 

our act’, we still have a long way to go. Also disappointing 

is the upward trend we seem to be experiencing in our 

greenhouse gas (GHG) emissions. Since 2009, Monash’s 

carbon footprint has increased by 8% - only 1% below 

‘business as usual’. This means Monash’s carbon footprint 

was only 1% lower than if they had simply continued 

emitting as they had previously with no effort to reduce 

emissions. Also among the increases are the emissions 

from gas used for heating and cooling with an increase of 

7%. 

In 2013, Monash aimed to reduce their potable 

water (drinking-water) consumption by 30% from 2010 

levels by 2020. This seems a little ambitious considering 

that in that year, they consumed 68,218 kilolitres more 

potable water than in 2010. Also intriguing is their goal 

of reducing energy consumption by 30% by 2020 even 

though in 2013, 101,991 gigajoules more energy was 

consumed than in 2010. 

Although these efforts may not appear 

monumental, they are definitely a step in the right 

direction. Climate change is a huge issue that needs to 

be dealt with (despite what Tony Abbott may have you 

believe). Every step is a good step. Although there are still 

plenty of things to do to achieve greater changes, we’re 

doing pretty well so far. 

“It seems that despite the slogan ‘greening 

up our act,’ we still have a long way to go.”

Arts & 

Culture 

Articles by Kelly Pigram, Lisa Healy, 

Emily Neilsen and Lauren Arnett 


36 

The Dark 

Knight Rises 

BY KELLY PIGRAM 

Coburg’s Batman Market 

returns in 2015 with more 

food trucks than you can 

handle. 

EVERY SUNDAY 

from 9am-3pm 

14-22 GAFFNEY ST, 

COBURG

37 

It’s early Sunday morning, and the somewhat narrow space 

between Batman train station and an old textiles factory is 

beginning to bustle with the sound of up to forty food trucks, 

fresh food stalls and market stalls – Coburg’s new Batman Market 

transforms the space into a foodie’s paradise. 

“The market was my Brother’s idea about three years 

ago, he’s the entrepreneurial one of the family.” Winnie Chen is 

fairly modest about her involvement in launching and designing 

the Batman Market late last year, which since its launch has 

enjoyed amazing and somewhat unexpected success. 

Ex-Monash students, Winnie and Ethan Chen regularly 

visited markets while growing up in Melbourne and became 

familiar with the market culture that dominates the Melbourne 

lifestyle. They visited and researched markets, but never acted on 

the idea of incorporating their familiar elements into their own 

until late last year, when the perfect opportunity came along to 

take control of an ideally located section of land in Coburg. 

“Basically we had access to some land behind an old 

textile factory. It wasn’t being used, it was just a spare lot and it’s 

“It’s very diverse. When you go to 

market, especially a farmers’ market, 

there’s a lot more western or English 

style food. One thing we tried to 

do was bring back what we saw in 

markets in Asia: a lot more treat 

foods, things that are cheap.” 

next to a train station, so we thought ‘why not?’” Chen said. 

The land in question is located right next to tram stop, 

train station, bike path and the only Bunnings in a 6km radius, 

which Chen says brings in people from four suburbs away on 

weekends. 

Batman Market is a nice contrast to some of 

Melbourne’s more popular, well established markets, where 

you tend to spend most of your time fighting through people 

scrambling for their weekly fruit and vegetables. At Batman 

Market you can stroll casually down a laneway of food trucks 

and street food stalls, each with their own personality and 

together offering an extensive array of cuisine, and then grab 

your fruit as you head out. There are splashes of flowers, art, 

crafts and groceries, but it’s a lot less of a farmers’ market, a lot 

more of a foodies’ market. A fact that’s great for Chen, because 

she’s been able to target a particularly young crowd, one that 

is full of potential and generally overlooked by other markets in 

Melbourne. 

Farmers’ markets across Australia are generally 

targeted at a much older demographic, “we’ve had vendors that 

have said they can’t sell their cakes at a farmers market because 

everyone is diabetic,” mostly middle aged people who come 

weekly to do their fruit and vegetable shopping. Chen says the 

young crowd at Batman Market comes for the food trucks that 

appear at the market every weekend. Popular trucks like Knock 

Mama, N2 Gelato and Little Mushroom all appear regularly. “It 

was originally a big thing that differentiated from other markets 

on the scene. We’ve got a good turnover of trucks so there’s 

always something different and we’re able to attract a lot younger 

crowd – to the point where our vendors say ‘oh your customer 

base is too young, we can’t sell our expensive wine bottles here.’” 

Many food trucks already set up in areas in Melbourne’s North, 

particularly around Brunswick and Coburg, and were excited that 

a market was opening in the area where there would be young 

people and a range of food, so were easy to persuade to take up 

spots in the market. 

Food trucks also played a key role in initially growing 

the market and its young customer base. “Trucks that are famous 

usually have about five to six thousand followers on Facebook, 

so it’s pretty much the power of social media that helped us a 

lot. They would do a post and give us a shout out and it really 

ballooned from there.” 

Another core component of the market is 

multiculturalism. Chen’s Chinese heritage is shown through the 

food offered. “It’s very diverse. When you go to market, especially 

a farmers’ market, there’s a lot more western or English style 

food. One thing we tried to do was bring back what we saw in 

markets in Asia: a lot more treat foods, things that are cheap.” 

At the most recent Chinese New Year market, they 

managed to get a hold of Dean’s Café, a popular Malaysian 

restaurant in nearby Thomastown who set up an extremely 

popular stall at the Chinese New Year market in Southbank. “They 

have a bit of a following… they just make the best satays, they 

are just to die for and then be re-incarnated and then to die for 

again”. 

Melbourne certainly isn’t devoid of food markets, which 

makes the decision to launch a new one somewhat daunting. 

The Queen Victoria Market is arguably the city’s most famous, 

bringing in thousands of people every day and recently launching 

a popular gourmet night market specifically for food stalls. 

The South Melbourne and Prahran markets are also extremely 

popular, frequented by chefs and foodies alike and providing 

fresh, organic food to its customers. 

But Winnie says that their success lies in their area. 

Coburg is an area of Melbourne which is somewhat neglected 

by markets. Strange, as Coburg neighbours with Brunswick and 

Thornbury, both suburbs dominated by Melbourne’s food and 

coffee culture, and an area often frequented by food trucks 

during the day. “There are farmers’ markets but there’s nothing 

really like this in that area, more of a foodies’ market. We get 

people from Reservoir, Strathmore… people more than two 

suburbs away.” 

They’re now encouraging local, returning customers by 

incorporating a groceries element into the market, to make the 

market part of their customer’s weekly routine. 

“Our market’s a bit different in the way that it took off. A lot of 

markets might start off really quietly and they’ll build over time, 

whereas we had a massive opening and it’s kind of settled down.” 

“I suppose in just in three months the market has 

transformed a lot and it’s going to keep changing, so it’s pretty 

exciting to be a part of it and to be doing something for the 

community… I really can’t wait for a day when the locals can’t 

remember a time when the market wasn’t open.”

38 

Superfoods 

BY LISA HEALY 

Kale chips. Cancer-fighting acai berries. Goji berries. Quinoa. 

Cacao. Teff. Maca. Coconut oil/milk/water/meat. The list could 

go on and on about what trendy ‘superfoods’ you should be 

replenishing your body with. If you’ve ever attempted to go on/ 

read about a two-week detox or are a massive trendy foodie 

or health fanatic, these are just some of the typically normal 

groceries you would pick up if they had an infinitely overloaded 

bank account. While it’s common place to see different health 

and food trends circulating every so often (remember cupcakes? 

Probably not because you’re drowning those memories in froyo), 

the latest one seems to have stuck around for the last few 

years is ‘superfoods’. 

Superfoods are typically defined as foods considered 

to be highly nutrient-dense and beneficial for one’s health. While 

it is great that some little black seeds can provide up to 17g of 

protein per 100g (I’m looking at you, chia), what has not been 

so great are the ramifications of the Western world’s health 

food pursuit. Not only is the price-tag for most of these foods 

ridiculously exorbitant, another overarching problem most seem 

to forget is the taxing issues it can cause for the developing 

countries that are producing and exporting these foods to our 

shores. 

This current trend of achieving optimal health and 

tossing processed foods out of our diets is great. Hopefully by 

the time we’re all old, we are dementia and wrinkle free, look like 

we’re 35 and ride our motorcycles, while cooling off with a Mojito 

in our retirement village apartments. Yet this is all a Western 

pursuit that is ‘trendy’ at the moment. So at what cost are we 

profiting off extracting staple foods and importing them from 

developing nations? 

Deakin University Lecturer Michael Vagg argues in a 

2014 report titled ‘Superfoods’ another battleground between 

marketing and common sense’ that our own pursuit for perfect 

health and fitting-in is damaging the livelihood and sustainability 

of many communities in developing countries. He states that 

‘it certainly doesn’t make ethical sense for healthy consumers 

in affluent countries to poach the staple crops from those who 

actually need them’. So how exactly could the radical increase 

in popularity of particular foods be causing grief for farmers and 

communities? 

Let’s use good ol’ quinoa (or kin-no-ah as some prefer to call 

it) as an example. Quinoa is considered to be a pseudocereal - 

not really a cereal, not really a seed; it’s been feeling pretty left 

out for a while. It has been harvested and consumed in South 

America, specifically Peru and Bolivia for thousands of years. Up 

until a few years ago, its existence was pretty much non-existent 

to a lot of Westerners. It wasn’t until it was discovered to be 

gluten-free and a high source of protein that it finally emerged 

out of the dry soil and started to immerse itself into cafes and 

health food stores across the Western world. Since then, quinoa 

has been on the way up, even having the UN appoint 2013 ‘The 

Year of Quinoa’. It was in that same honorary year that The 

Guardian UK reported that retail prices of quinoa had risen a 

staggering 600% since 2000. 

The increase in demand for quinoa has been anything but 

minute. From 20,000 tonnes a year in the 1980’s to what is now 

approximately 100,000 tonnes a year, Peru and Bolivia have had 

to make way for the high demand. And it isn’t only us having 

to pay for the huge spike in demand and cost. Government 

officials and heads of quinoa collectives have spoken out against

39 

“Not only is the price-tag for most of these foods ridiculously 

exorbitant, another overarching problem most seem to forget is 

the taxing issues it can cause for the developing countries that are 

producing and exporting these foods to our shores.” 

the pseudocereal’s popularity stating that it is making it more 

expensive and difficult to obtain for those who actually grow it. 

Because of this, head of the La Paz quinoa farming collective, 

Daysi Munoz, said in 2013 that “as the price has risen, quinoa is 

consumed less and less in Bolivia.” 

Yet here at home, people will continue to pay, no 

matter the high price. At Coles, where the prices are meant to 

be ‘down down down’, a 500g packet of quinoa sells for $8.50 in 

comparison to its fellow gluten-free, ‘true grain’ counterpart, rice, 

which sells for $1.80 for a 1kg of long grain rice. Yes, rice has been 

eaten in greater quantities for longer than quinoa in Australia, 

but it still seems that if a trendy new food is touted around 

enough, the price is often nearly irrelevant to trend-abiding 

consumers who will purchase it regardless. 

Despite the disagreement some may have towards the 

superfoods movement, on the other side of the spectrum there 

are others telling everyone to calm down. University of Toronto 

professor Pierre Desrochers argues that increased interest 

in these foods may not necessarily adversely affect farmers 

and the community. Instead, promoting these foods as being 

globally accessible may actually improve rather than hinder 

their standard of living. He further contends that, “the culprit of 

hunger is often bad local politics, not other people wanting to 

buy your food.” 

Other experts have noted that what is happening is a 

perfectly normal food evolution, with foods such as potatoes, 

corn and wine having previously transitioned at some point in 

time from ‘exotic’ to becoming a staple in the Western diet. And 

while it appears we could essentially be robbing producers and 

consumers overseas of their staple foods, some agree that it 

is integrating more diverse and foreign foods into the diets of 

developing countries, such as pasta and rice. 

The rollercoaster that is this movement doesn’t appear 

to be slowing down anytime soon. Going into most cafes across 

Melbourne usually results in seeing foods like quinoa, goji berries 

and kale on the menu. Acai berries, a berry with a high amount 

of antioxidants were hardly known before they emerged out of 

Brazil around 10 years ago and in the last few years have had 

a huge following. According to Time Magazine, coconut water 

exports out of the Philippines were up 300% in the first 3 months 

of 2012. Some have expressed similar worry regrading quinoa, 

that as demand goes up and prices follow suite that the profit for 

coconut farmers won’t equal the costs to produce. 

So what happens when the kale isn’t so much greener 

on the other side, when people realise that quinoa looks like a 

strange transparent version of caviar and goji berries - which 

happen to be strangely addictive -are just like shrivelled up red 

sultanas? It’s hard to predict what will happen when the next 

‘it’ food swoops in and the same cycle of demand and supply is 

meant to occur. Yet if the market for a particular food suddenly 

shrinks, what sort of further consequences can we expect and 

how long can the agricultural industry keep up with our trends 

and bids for ‘perfect health’? 

So while we may take delight in eating our beetroot 

quinoa salad with flaxseed, just remember that people have 

been eating all these funky foods for thousands of years. So 

really, perhaps those quinoa-growers and eaters in Peru or the 

goji berry farmers in China are the true hipsters and we’re all just 

Western carbon copy wannabes.

40 

Celebrity, media power 

and Kim Kardashian 

BY EMILY NEILSEN 

“Did you hear about how Kim Kardashian broke the internet with 

a nude photo of her huge butt?” That is the first thing my friend 

said to me when I saw her most recently. While I was willing to 

discuss Kim’s butt size at the time I really don’t give a damn 

about the girl. The internet has since been repaired since her 

infamous photo-shoot earlier this year but her media presence is 

unwavering. 

After reading Graham Turner’s Understanding Celebrity 

for class last year, I went on a discovery to see if I could find out 

how media power plays a part in the concept of celebrity. Many 

celebrities exist because they fit into a particular ‘media narrative’ 

and not necessarily for their talents, if they have any at all. Take 

Corey Delaney for example. He was all over the media back in 

2008 when he had an out of control house party, Project X style. 

The media narrative he fit into was that of the typical teenage boy 

who doesn’t care about misbehaving and the consequences. 

Academics have studied the concept of being a 

‘talentless’ celebrity, saying they are intentionally fabricated to 

satisfy our exaggerated expectations of human greatness. So, 

while these celebrities are seemingly talentless, the constant 

media coverage makes their lives become part of our lives. Soon 

enough, we start following what they do and where they go as if it 

is the most fascinating thing on earth. 

Yet, sometimes it is. Thanks to the invention of 

television and photography, we can see celebrities going 

about their everyday lives. Professor Andy Ruddock of Monash 

University states in his journal Youth and Media that “Celebrity is 

also the product of media industries that rely on ordinary people 

and places for content”. This means that for the audience, we see 

that these celebrities are actually just ordinary people like us and 

we develop a connection with them. 

Ruddock also made the argument that these reality 

effects are what provide us with the ideas and stories that we 

use to make sense of the world and ourselves. It is also how a 

participatory culture is created between the youth and celebrity. 

By following media output, but also by assuring that the celebrity 

stays in the spotlight, we are validating our existence through 

the media. Every time you take a photo in front of a celebrity’s 

house or with the celebrity themselves, you are contributing and 

engaging with the life of the celebrity that the media is portraying. 

This attraction is where an imagined intimacy occurs. Younger 

people draw out similarities between their lives, which forms a 

greater attraction to the celebrity, also relating to fandom. 

These days, there’s even more ways to participate in 

the celebrity culture and contribute to media power. Social media 

platforms like Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and Snapchat mean 

we can share photos and videos quickly in any part of the world. 

Celebrity only survives because of the broad spectrum of these 

modes of consumption. 

Now, let’s talk about Kim Kardashian. She’s the perfect 

example because she is famous just for being famous. One could 

argue that, in fact, before she became famous she was already 

starting a fashion business with her sisters. But I’m going to stop 

you right there Kimmy K fans. She isn’t a celebrity because of 

these successes. Her father was a celebrity long before she was, 

who managed to create a career out of the media by staying in the 

spotlight. Her successes are completely overshadowed by the way 

the media represents her as a celebrity and not as a successful 

business woman. However, her beauty and fashion lines became 

successful because of her audience who are connecting with 

this representation and use her products as a way to develop a 

connection with her. 

The reality show of her family The Kardashians shows 

her glamorous life, but most importantly it also shows the 

ordinary, every day parts including normal family dramas. This 

disguises the fact that only those who fit into established media 

narratives can become a celebrity. Body image is something 

that is criticized in the media frequently and that young people 

have various issues with. By showing her curvaceous body on the 

pages, a wider demographic of young girls who, like Kim, have 

different bodies to the typical models and actresses that cover 

the pages are drawn to her. By seeing this different figure, women 

respect her more for it and develop a connection with her. 

Advancement of new technologies is working in favour 

of these celebrities and young people are aiding in making media 

power stronger. It also shows that the media is reliant not only 

on audience participation but also the idea that anyone can be a 

celebrity. Anyone, like you. 

“Every time you take 

a photo in front of a 

celebrity’s house or with 

the celebrity themselves, 

you are contributing and 

engaging with the life 

of the celebrity that the 

media is portraying.”

41 

Monash music 

BY LAUREN ARNETT 

Call me biased, but most kids whose hearts are in the music 

are good to the core. They care. They have discipline. They are 

enthusiastic and are continually striving for a divinity that is 

practically unattainable. That is the beautiful and terrifying thing 

about music – the sky is the limit! 

The Music Faculty is a humble one – a relatively small 

musical community where people flock to practice for hours, 

collaborate in chamber music or small ensembles, or just hang 

out in the Den sipping coffee in between Ear Training and Jazz 

Arranging. What I love about the Music faculty is the sense 

of connectedness. Because you rely on each other for group 

collaboration and ensemble work, you gradually get to know The 

Piano Kids, The Brass Guys, The Classical Voice Students, Those 

Pesky Clarinets, the Creative Music Technology whizzes and the 

innovative composers, to name a few! You can catch the string 

players of the Faculty and musicians from the broader university 

in the Monash Academy Orchestra, which is a semi-professional 

orchestra playing classical repertoire at our very own Robert 

Blackwood Hall. Rehearsal periods are in short bursts, but are 

intense and rigorous. Their concerts are to a very high standard, 

and best of all, they are free for Monash students. Make the most 

of this opportunity – their concert highlights for the year include 

Brahms 4, Tchaikovsky’s Piano Concerto No 1 and Beethoven 

9! This orchestra is open by audition to any Monash Clayton 

student, so even those outside the music faculty can have a go. 

We in the music faculty are very excited to announce 

that we have lodged an application to start our own Music society 

with C&S. Over the last few years, we have enviously watched 

the Law Ball, Science Society social events and Mess Camps take 

place, and we were baffled as to why there was not a space for 

us to be social outside of the Performing Arts foyer too! Some 

of the society’s aims will be to promote social and professional 

connections between students, to provide study aid and to 

support first year students. We cannot wait for the society to get 

off the ground! Watch this space! 

If serious orchestras are not your style, other musical 

outlets such as the Monash Philharmonic Society, Monash 

Big Band and Monash University Choral Society are highly 

recommended. All three of these clubs allow you to continue 

where you left your instrument in Year 12, or to gain performance 

experience in a fun and relaxed environment. I caution that the 

jazz bands are auditioned, so you might want to brush up on your 

instrument if you haven’t played since your mum was picking you 

and your double bass up from after-school jazz band; all those 

years ago. 

As a music student, the general reaction that I get 

when I tell people what I study is one of delight and interest. 

The beauty of music is that it is a universal language. As a sonic 

medium, we can enjoy music in so many forms. Often the people 

I converse with begin to reminisce about when they played an 

instrument, and they fondly remember how they reached Grade 

5 and then stopped. Often there is an irritating stigma directed 

towards Music and Arts students that is something along the 

lines of studying simply for the sake of studying. The career 

options at the end of your time at university are slightly vaguer 

than Law, Business or Engineering. Contrary to popular belief, 

however, musicians have dozens of career opportunities such 

as becoming professional performers, teachers, Foley Artists, 

sound technicians, DJ’s, Performing Arts Centre personnel, sound 

samplers, musicologists, conductors and composers. 

Whether you are a frustrated high school 

instrumentalist or an inner virtuoso yet to discover your musical 

powers, I would greatly encourage you to get involved in music in 

and around the University community. If you consider yourself an 

aspiring musician, join the Facebook page ‘Musos from Monash’ 

to find friends, jobs, gigs and advice. In the bowels of the Campus 

Centre you will find practice rooms (and possibly a gateway to 

the Chamber of Secrets or a closet to Narnia), so why not wheel 

your cello to uni and have a bit of a play down there someday? 

The walls echo, so you will sound amazing by default. Unlike the 

weekly booking sheets in the School of Music, the Campus Centre 

rooms operate on a first in, best dressed basis so if you want a 

room, get in quick. I also give you permission to kick out those 

members of the community who use the rooms for activities 

other than music. Because after all, what happens in the practice 

room...stays in the practice room.

Monash Bikeshare 

fun - healthy - convenient - sustainable - affordable - flexible 

Available to everyone at Monash 

Become a member and use a bike to get around 

campus, travel to the train station, grab a coffee, or 

ride just for fun! For more information, membership 

options, and to register, visit: 

monashbikeshare.com 

fernwoodfitness.com.au 

facebook.com/fernwoodfitness 

Monash Student Association 

Student Rights 

When things go wrong... 

Level 1, Campus Centre 

(Next to MSA Reception) 

21 Chancellors Walk 

msa.monash.edu/studentrights 

• Unit Failure (Exclusion) 

• Discipline 

• Grievance 

• Special Consideration 

...and you need to understand your options.

Sex 

Articles by Betty Woodville, Rhyss 

Wyllie, Karen Freilich, and Anonymous 


44 

Tales from the Cunnilinguist 

Learning the 

Kamasutra 

Note: The sexual positions descrived in this piece refer to 

heterosexual couples. Unfortunately, the Kamasutra itself 

refers to hetersexual couples. Time for a re-write? 

I have always thought of the Kamasutra as that book that everyone in the 60s went mad over; which 

inspired all that crazy porn in 70s; which then became a punchline in the 80s; and by now has evolved 

into something that cultists, shamans and other new-agers cling to as a remnant of ancient 

sexual literature. It was written as a guidebook to a life of virtue and grace in love, family life 

and sex. Considering there are chapters called ‘acquiring a wife’, ‘treatment of other 

men’s wives’ and ‘duties and privileges of the wife’, I found myself skipping over 

the stuff about virtue and hunting for the only thing that remains relevant 

to a feminist nymph like me: the sex positions. It’s time to see if the 

Kamasutra is as crazy as mainstream culture presents it to 

be, and if I could attempt them with anything 

resembling ‘grace’. 

C O N T E N T W A R N 

I N G : T H I S P I E C E C O N TA I N S 

E X P L I C I T D E S C R 

I P T I O N S O F 

S E X 

A C T S 

BY BETTY WOODVILLE

45 

Foreplay 

As with any ritual, the Kamasutra considers foreplay a 

preparation of the body: absolutely necessary and an act of 

respect to one’s self and one’s partner. From applying lipstick 

to lube, any act that makes you feel sexy and you know will 

enhance your sexual experience is an act of foreplay. Aside from 

mental preparation, there is also the physical. There is a massive 

focus in the Kamasutra on the erogenous zones and playing with 

non-penetrative sex in order to ready the body (particularly the 

female body) for penetrative sex. Breasts, thighs, butt cheeks, 

nipples: do what it takes to bring her to orgasm now rather than 

later. Spanking is described in detail, and is encouraged to be 

reciprocal, possibly due to the balance of harmony the text wants 

to create. I was more impressed with how normal this all seemed 

to me than shocked by any content: the neckkissing, earlobenibbling, 

booty-grabbing and body spanking behaviour seems 

perfectly pedestrian - nothing I am a stranger to. I flick through 

the text more, trying to find something to shock me. 

Receiver-on-Top 

I tried every one of these and loved them and I would describe 

each and every one but there isn’t enough space in the whole of 

Lot’s Wife for me to do each and every one justice. Instead, I’ll 

talk about my favourite. Funnily enough, I discovered this one 

not during my ‘research’ for this article, but after a toga party in 

firstyear. After a six-pack and a joint and a half, I went home with 

my boyfriend and took a massive nap, woke up in the middle 

of the night and we went to town on each other. The best thing 

about sobering up after drinking is that you know exactly what 

you’re doing but you’re just drunk enough not to care how gross 

it might look. This isn’t a position that will imbue anyone with 

‘grace’: Tuck your feet into the crevice of his hips, squat down 

onto him, rest your hands (or hand) on his thighs and ride with 

spirit. This is not a position to try and be cute about. This is a 

real animalistic kind of position that will make you ferociously 

sweat and grunt and want to cover your mirrors. Though 

honestly, after one try, you will stop caring. 

Giver-on-Top 

With heaps of stuff about ‘lift your legs up and rest them on his 

shoulders’ and ‘increase the pressure’, I got very bored. This is 

material I have been working since my first sexual experience 

- instinctively. Give me something more impressive than 

missionary-but-with-my-ankles-by-my-head. But then I found 

it. With the knees and thighs pressed together, and both legs 

propped over his shoulder, we did something very impressive 

indeed. Prime access to the G-spot, easy boob-grabbing and easy 

clitoral [self] stimulation, I was having multiples for minutes and 

minutes on end: I definitely found a new usual. 

From Behind 

The best one the Kamasutra could offer me works well on a 

table or on a couch, depending on how tall you are and how 

high it sits. I am bent over from the hips, with something to rest 

my entire torso on (my bed is high so I used that, but the dining 

room table is just as high), and part my legs to shoulder-width; 

the results were astounding. The stretch in my legs created 

heaps of muscular tension; pressure we all know is created 

when we bend over; and the freedom with which my boyfriend 

could thrust combined to create a fuck that was very powerful, 

very satisfying and guaranteed to please both of you within a 

minute or two. Of course if you get bored of that, you are both in 

prime position to switch it up for some oral, and there’s always 

something lovely about being turned around, laid down and 

eaten out before you even know what’s going on. 

Afterplay 

Penile multiple orgasms are not only possible, but encouraged. 

Why stop at one, anyway? I know it takes a lot out of them, but 

seriously, it can be done! I tried it. They have to want it, and they 

have to work with you, but it is definitely possible. Take a break 

afterwards, let them get their breath back, and start using your 

hands ever so gently on the frenulum and the shaft. Plenty of 

communication is key here to make sure there isn’t anything 

incredibly painful happening, but once you break through that 

post-orgasm wall together, you can start again and go at it ‘til 

dawn. 

Afterthought: From this entire expedition I can report that there 

is nothing graceful about the Kamasutra. It is primal, it will return 

you to your most animal, mammalian state. The idea that we 

ever thought it was ‘crazy’ and ‘complex’ is frankly laughable 

when we get down to just how simple it all is: prolong the 

pleasure for as long as possible.

46 

From patriarchy to 

gaytriarchy 

The misogyny of gay men 

BY RHYSS WYLIE 

Growing up a gay male in rural Victoria I experienced my 

fair share of pain and legitimately thought I was the most 

oppressed person around. 

Fortunately for me I had a great support network of 

women, which seems to be common to gay men around the 

world. What is also common to gay men is the subtle and 

inherent misogyny of us towards women, which we often 

don’t see. Our privilege as cisgender men blinds us to the way 

that we utilise women for our own personal gain or mental 

health. 

I was socialised from a young age to demonise the feminine 

in myself and therefore in others. Growing up in a masculine 

culture does its best to ensure that gay men hate themselves 

growing up, or more specifically hate the femme in them. 

It is hardly a radical idea then that we internalise this 

misogyny and utilise women as currency for favour with 

straight, masculine men? I loved being the ‘gatekeeper’ of 

my female friends at school – it allowed me to compete with 

straight men. But all this really did was involve me in a game of 

ownership over my friends. 

That’s fucked. 

Internalised femmephobia in the gay community isn’t just 

directed at women, but at anyone who doesn’t fit an idealised 

concept of what a gay man should be. A quick glance at 

Grindr or Tinder will leave you with a smorgasbord of “no 

femmes” and “str8 acting” (a completely vile phrase, I might 

add) for you to access, but only if you’re masculine too. 

We are taught to hate the femme in ourselves and this 

reinforces a toxic gay ideology that still values masculinity 

over femininity. We can easily become a caricature of the 

worst of straight men, as the narrative is dominated by those 

on top (pun intended). 

The number of gay men that I have met who have serious 

problems with giving head or ‘being a bottom’ is painful. 

They can’t bring themselves to be submissive or passive, 

which reflects this femmephobia; their desire to insulate 

themselves and their masculinity from the disempowering 

effect of loving other men is distressingly obvious. 

Touching women’s bodies without their consent is 

something that so many gay men are guilty of. We feel we 

have an entitlement to this because we aren’t sexually 

attracted to women. 

This is bullshit. 

It reflects and inherent misogyny that reinforces 

“Internalised 

femmephobia in 

the gay community 

isn’t just directed at 

women, but at anyone 

who doesn’t fit an 

idealised concept of 

what a gay man 

should be.” 

female disempowerment and, by extension, our empowerment. 

We want to touch and have opinions of women’s bodies to utilize 

as masculine currency – if we can get away with things that straight 

men can’t then that makes us better than them, right? 

This extends to the tired cliché of our entitlement to judge 

and comment on female bodies as impartial, expert third parties. 

We feel our objectification of women is innocent, but it elevates us 

to a position of gatekeeper once again. Our opinions and voices are 

valued over female ones. 

A strong criticism leveled at the gay male community is their 

neglect of lesbian and queer women’s needs within the gay rights 

movement. While gay activists are up in arms over Chick Fil-A’s 

‘biblical values’ or any bakery that refuses to make a gay wedding 

cake, we are noticeably absent when it comes to IVF access, equal 

pay, abortion rights and the gendered stereotypes that we need 

to challenge. The prevalence of these issues makes it difficult for 

queer women to maintain active and productive involvement in 

the movement. 

To work towards a more just world for both ourselves and 

for women, we can’t keep subscribing to patriarchal ideals that 

suppress femininity. We have to acknowledge that just because 

we are oppressed, we cannot ignore other oppressions. 

It’s time to get real.

47 

Content warning: Descriptions of 

medical examinations and procedures 

The 

Wondering 

Uterus 

BY KAREN FREILICH 

How do I know if I have an STI? 

Is it likely that I will actually get 

one, and if so, which ones do I 

need to check for? 

- JAMES 

Most people who have an STI have no idea that they have 

one. Most are silent and asymptomatic, leading to a false 

sense of security! Some may present with discharge, 

itching, warts or pain. STIs are common amongst all age 

groups, and even more common amongst 15-29 year olds. 

In Australia, the most frequently reported STI is chlamydia, 

with up to 1 in 20 young Australians currently affected. Each 

STI can lead to different consequences down the track. For 

example, untreated chlamydia can cause pelvic inflammatory 

disease (PID) and can lead to infertility. Testing for STIs 

is usually free and incredibly easy, and chlamydia (the most 

common bacterial STI) can be tested simply by peeing in 

a cup. Some STIs may also require a swab (oral, vaginal or 

anal, depending how you sex), a simple physical examination, 

and some may require a blood test. Treatment varies 

between STIs. For chlamydia, treatment is usually one day 

of antibiotics only. Super straight-forward! 

It’s recommended to get regular checks once 

you start being sexually active and every time you have a 

new partner (preferably before being sexually active with 

a new partner!). As you’ve probably heard a million times, 

the only thing that can prevent STIs are condoms. There is 

quite a range of condoms and (water-based!) lubricants out 

there to suit individual needs, and it may be worth testing a 

few out to see what works for you. If you’re thinking about 

stopping condom use with a new partner, it’s worth both (or 

all) of you heading down to your local clinic to get a check. 

If you do have an STI, your doctor or local clinic 

can speak to you about the best way of informing past or 

current partners, and some anonymous services may be 

available. And finally, don’t hesitate to have the slightly 

awkward conversation and ask your new partner if they’ve 

been tested, or about using a condom. 

Someone was saying that a pap 

smear is a type of STI check. 

Whaaat? 

- STEPH 

Great question! Pap smears check for changes to the cells 

in the cervix (the ‘doorway’ in between the vagina and the 

uterus), which may indicate a greater risk of cervical cancer. 

These pre-cancerous and cancerous changes to the 

cervix are usually caused by the Human Papilloma Virus 

(HPV), which is actually a viral STI. Fifty years ago, cervical 

cancer due to HPV was one of the leading causes of death 

in women from cancer, but now thanks to pap smears 

- which can detect early pre-cancerous changes - it has 

dropped to the 13th most likely cause of female cancer 

mortality. The confusion regarding the link between STI 

and pap smears seems to have been a relatively clever 

marketing tool to avoid reference of ‘STI’ with the words 

‘pap smear’, or ‘Gardasil’ as a means to avoid the stigma 

associated with getting checked. The Gardasil vaccine is 

excellent in helping prevent HPV transmission (and men, 

go and get one too), but like anything is not 100% effective 

and so make sure to get a regular pap! As they say, it’s 

just slight discomfort for a lot of peace of mind. 

I’ve heard about using Mooncups 

for preiods, but apparently they 

are really messy. What do I need 

to know about them? 

- ISABELLA 

The Mooncup is a re-useable silicone menstrual cup 

which is used as an alternative to pads and tampons and 

marketed as being eco-friendly, safe, ethical, and cost-effective 

as they can last up to 10 years. They are usually 

Bell shaped and are placed inside the vagina below the 

cervix (the roof of the vagina) and collect menstrual blood 

over 8 hours. Many women find the Mooncup to be very 

comfortable and don’t usually feel it at all whilst wearing 

it. They are not thought to be associated with causing 

infection, though some women have found that they 

may aggravate UTIs. So, is it messy? It shouldn’t be, but it 

does take practice to get used to using the cup effectively. 

When taking out the cup, take it out slowly and try not 

to tilt it on an angle. If there is leakage, it may mean that 

it wasn’t inserted properly, or the size of the cup may be 

wrong. For a slightly more entertaining explanation, check 

out Tampon vs Mooncup Rap Battle on Youtube.

48 

Tricking 

BY ANONYMOUS 

I’m the last person in the world you’d expect to see in a porn film. 

Male, mid 20’s hipster student: for all intents and purposes, the 

definition of Melbourne normal. The path leading to my decision 

to appear in porn is tangled and complete happenstance. I saw an 

ad on Facebook looking for male talent for solo shoots. The person 

posting the ad, Julia*, is an Australian feminist pornographer in her 

40s, who later told me she has been working in the industry for the 

last ten years. It’s very much a grass roots industry, she told me; kind 

of an underground scene. At the time I was in a mountain of debt and 

getting paid to wank didn’t seem like such a bad idea. I sent her a 

message. 

To my surprise she promptly responded and told me 

the studio had accepted me. The content would be produced 

for a new German website and I would be required to perform a 

filmed interview that she would conduct. I would then undress and 

masturbate before camera to climax on her couch. I agreed to those 

conditions and we set up a date. 

I’d decided not to tell my friends what I was about to do, as 

I wanted to have the experience then measure whether or not it was 

worthy of my narrative. You have to control what you tell people. It’s 

important to have a consistent image and this was definitely an out of 

character venture I was about to embark on. 

Once outside Julia’s apartment the nerves set in. I pace up 

and down on the street five times before summoning the courage to 

send her a message to let her know I’m outside. I can’t quite believe 

that I am standing only minutes away from entering the world of porn. 

I hadn’t even clearly formulated a decision about whether or not this 

was something I should go through with, but I’d come too far to wimp 

out. 

Julia’s apartment was neat and stylish, nothing about her 

apartment or character screamed riches. She made every effort to 

make me feel comfortable, like this was an everyday thing; like the 

whole world does it and it’s simply matter of fact. Her psychology 

was effective; it made me feel at ease. It was very different to the 

stereotype of a pornographer’s relationship with a performer, which is 

seen to be exclusively, inherently exploitative. 

The nature of control is never more challenging than in the 

context of sexual experiences. 

I sat down on the couch, she issued me a release form, 

got me to show my ID, photographed it for her records, then ensured 

that I was totally cool with what I was about to do and aware of the 

consequences. 

There was a stack of 50 dollar bills on the table, just to let 

me know that once I gave the money shot I’d have dollars to show for 

it in my pockets. Julia positioned me on a chair before her camera, a 

consumer DSLR. There were two lights either side of me. This is where 

the interview would happen. 

‘Have you ever been in porn before? When did you first 

start masturbating?’ Questions pulled straight from the script of 

casting couch porn, which I’m all too familiar with. I tried to speak but 

my mind couldn’t work in harmony with my mouth. I felt out of body 

as the words poured out, like it wasn’t me speaking the gibberish 

I was being asked to deliver. What the fuck am I talking about? I 

thought. Julia noticed something was out of place. 

‘Would you like to sit somewhere else? Do you feel 

uncomfortable in this set-up?’ Yes. So I moved to the couch. She asked 

if I wanted something to drink. I was gagging for one. She poured me 

a scotch and almost immediately things started to feel better. The 

camera took aim and this time I could answer the questions naturally, 

uninhibited. 

I noticed I was talking to her like she was a friend. My

49 

“I guess I’m not as 

progressive as I thought.” 

mind tried to hide the fact that she was a pornographer and I was her 

subject. The questions become a little less predictable. 

‘What would your advice be for someone going on a first 

date?’ 

‘Have some drinks beforehand. You need to loosen up. Be 

in a position to act like you don’t give a fuck. But I wouldn’t throw my 

advice to anyone. The sort of advice I give isn’t healthy.’ 

‘Do you have any fantasies?’ 

‘Nothing too outlandish. The fantasies I have are about 

things I want to achieve in real life. I don’t see the point in fantasizing 

about shit I couldn’t do. I mean it just seems fucking stupid.’ 

‘What sort of porn do you like?’ 

‘I like amateur porn with women I can realistically imagine 

being with. I’m not into the fake tits, Hollywood Barbie Doll bullshit.’ 

After downing another scotch she led me through what 

I was expected to do. I had to unbutton my shirt, slowly. Let it fall 

to the ground. Fuck it felt ridiculous doing that in front of a camera. 

I’ve never been able to gracefully take off my clothes. Then I had to 

remove my belt, unzip my pants and lie down on the couch in my 

pants. Then start touching myself. 

‘You’re doing really good, would you like some porn to look 

at?’ 

‘Yeah.’ I needed something. It was fucking difficult trying 

to get an erection in front of a complete stranger who had no sexual 

relationship with me beyond the lens of her voyeuristic camera. She 

put her laptop down on the table and told me to take my time finding 

a porn clip that would make me aroused. Didn’t take long. I selected 

a clip then resumed my pathetic attempt at masturbating. I’m not 

an exhibitionist by nature. The clip of a woman fingering herself was 

working and I tugged off in front of Julia as she walked around me, 

filming with the DSLR in hand, getting a variety of angles to work with 

in the edit. I guess she was big on the mise-en-scène. 

After about fifteen minutes with no money shot, she asked 

if I needed a break and suggested it might be better for her to give 

me some privacy. Fuck yes it would be better. I got some more scotch 

and went back to work pulling off. Wanking in front of a camera on a 

tripod in a stranger’s apartment for a measly four hundred dollars is 

an experience that definitely makes you question your choices in life. 

I could hear the sound of the neighbours coming and going 

through their front door just across the hall. This made me slow down 

- I didn’t want them to have to hear the sound of one lubricated hand 

clapping. 

I wondered if this might sound like home to them. Surely 

they would have heard many sounds of a far more exhilarating sexual 

nature emerging from this apartment. I had to focus. I thought of the 

money. Then I thought of the woman in the porn clip and her pussy. 

Imagined myself there in the clip, next to her, fucking her. I had to 

disengage from the present situation to strike the right mood. My 

mind stuck to this and I climaxed. I cleaned up the mess and quickly 

dressed, hit by a sudden wave of Catholic-like guilt and shame. I 

guess I’m not as progressive as I thought. 

I sat on the couch in silence for a few minutes collecting my 

hazy thoughts before Julia opened the door to see how things were 

going. ‘Oh, you’re done. Are you usually this quiet?’ She was startled. 

‘It’s funny,’ she said, ‘I find men are far more quiet than women, who 

can be very noisy… you should’ve told me you were about to come. 

We normally get a shot of your load on your tummy.’ Thank God I’d 

been spared this indignity. I feigned ignorance about the correct 

procedure. 

She replayed the footage to herself to inspect the moment 

of climax, to ensure it was an audiencefriendly moment. She was 

happy with the result. I must be a natural. I pocketed the cash. 

I walked back onto the street like nothing untoward 

had happened, but I had a big secret I was trying to make sense of. 

When I think back on the whole affair, I’m struck by how completely 

unspectacular it all felt. There was nothing too scary for me. Julia 

wasn’t a complete weirdo. All things considered it was a pretty 

smooth ride. Maybe I was lucky but it dispelled any notion I had about 

porn being a difficult industry to enter into. I’m exactly the same 

person I was before I met 

Julia. 

Only difference is I’m in a soon to be released porn film. 

* NAMES AND AGES HAVE BEEN CHANGED

50 

Exciting new stereotypes for 

My Kitchen Rules 

BY RHYSS WYLLIE 

Channel 7 has announced that 2016’s My Kitchen 

Rules will include ‘more stereotypes than even 

a thermomix can handle’, as they build on the 

successful utilisation of every gendered trope they 

could find in the Herald Sun’s opinion pages. 

My Kitchen Rules is inarguably the best 

show on television. One producer put its popularity 

down to the seamless editing that made the 

audience feel at home. 

‘We try to make our viewers - especially 

our male ones - as comfortable as possible by 

not missing an opportunity to remind everyone 

that women are bitchy and often forget to put 

the requisite berries in their raspberry swirl 

cheesecakes. The incompetence that we manage 

to portray through selective editing is such an 

accomplishment, almost as great as Pete’s tan’. 

My Kitchen Rules has been criticised for 

selectively editing footage to produce villains each 

season, however one producer told Lot’s Wife that 

this was ‘Masterchef’s fault. If they didn’t have more 

competent cooks than we do then we wouldn’t 

have to sensationalise things. Channel 10 are 

literally forcing us to destroy people because none 

of our lot can cook for shit.’ 

Each year My Kitchen Rules picks a 

couple of young women to be victimised and 

edited to appear as the villains. When asked about 

the rampant bullying and hospitalisation of one 

of last year’s villains due to exhaustion and stress, 

Channel 7 told us that, ‘if the contestants can’t take 

the heat they should get out of the kitchen’, before 

chuckling, turning into a wasp and flying away. 

In the latest season of My Kitchen Rules, 

Channel 7 has gone to great lengths to victimise 

promo models Katie and Nikki as the ‘bitchy girls’. 

‘Splicing footage together to make it appear as 

though all they talk about is boys, girls and how 

pretty they are hopefully inspires young girls as 

much as it does us,’ a producer told us. 

‘Some of the contestants are pretty 

selfish and really can’t see the bigger picture in 

terms of what brings in ad revenue for us. Then 

there are guys like Mark who make our job so much 

easier - we didn’t even have to ask him to be a 

shameless dickhead who takes up too much space.’ 

Recently it was revealed that Mark - 

the loud, patronising, chauvinistic piece of shit 

tennis coach - has neglected to pay child support 

payments of $36,000. Unfortunately this is not 

satire. 

Channel 7 are proud that their 

mistreatment of contestants is ‘not just confined to 

denigrating women…we’ve also done the lesbians’. 

‘Last year we made an executive decision 

to not let the lesbian couple Carly & Tresne be “out” 

on the show.’ Instead of lovers, they were depicted 

as best mates. Naturally, Channel 7 continued, ‘we 

just wanted to make sure they weren’t victimised by 

the public or other contestants because at the end 

of the day that’s our job.’ 

Indeed it is.

Write lots? 

Write Lot’s! 

Lot’s Wife is a student-run publication, written 

by people just like you. 

If you’re a writer, artist, cartoonist, illustrator, 

or just a plain-old narcissist, we want to 

publish you! 

(First timers welcome) 

Drop by the Lot’s Office on the 1st floor of 

Campus Center, or send an email to: 

msa-lotswife@monash.edu

52 

Peer Support offers one-on-one sessions with trained facilitators to help 

improve English language in assignments. 

Bring your assignments along and get feedback on areas to 

improve English language skills 

Facilitators will provide you with tips and resources to improve 

your English language skills 

No appointment needed, just come along 

The Program will run throughout the semester, in the John 

Medley Library (Campus Centre) on the following days: 

TUESDAY 

WEDNESDAY 

THURSDAY 

11am – 2pm 

11am – 2pm 

11am – 2pm 

msa.monash.edu/peersupport

Lot's Wife Edition 2 2015

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