_OceanofPDF

“Why does it matter now?”
“Because I never got to explain. If he died thinking I missed his
wedding to throw mom’s ashes in the garbage disposal or whatever… he’d
think I did it out of spite.”
“And you didn’t.” The statement was both a question and
encouragement for more.
“No, I didn’t. Mom up there, looking down at Dad and his new wife…
I’m not saying I didn’t hate you, because I did. But I wanted Dad to be
happy and I wanted Mom at peace. So I spread the ashes over the front
pavement at the Observatory, because she named me star and that’s dumb,
but it was all I could think of. Then I put the urn back. Without her inside, it
was just a container.”
“That’s a lovely story,” she said dryly.
“Did you tell him?”
“Did I?” She looked into space for a moment, head tilted. I assumed she
was coming up with an extra biting retort. In the end, I kind of wished she
had. “Basile found out a couple of years later. He moved it, and it was too
light. He was… shall we say, distraught.”
I swallowed hard. He’d never said anything to me. Bianca must have
told him about my jeans and the mysterious ash. Why did he not come to
me? “What did he say when you told him?”
“When I told him what?”
“About the ash on my jeans, Bianca. Stop fucking around.”
She came down the steps, stopping in front of me with the banister
between us. “I told him I’d been dusting up there and it fell. I told him the
ashes came out and I cleaned them up before he could see. He was livid. He
called me a liar. He said I was covering for the cleaning lady. Then when
she denied it, he said I was trying to purge your mother. He couldn’t believe
what a sneak I was. He said I’d done it out of spite. I didn’t tell him that his
daughter was the spiteful one.”
Bianca, the stepmonster, had covered for me? Lied for me? Risked her
marriage to an unforgiving man to protect me? Who was she?
Who was I?
Was I the kind of person who let that happen? Was I someone who did
bad things and covered them up, thinking as long as I didn’t get caught, no
one was hurt?
“I’m—”