_OceanofPDF

That explained a lot of what I suspected. She wasn’t weary of me, but
the life I offered.
After a pause for coffee, she said, “I guess I met Malcolm about four
years ago. We lasted four months or so, which was, like, a record for me.
He was the worst. I mean the absolute most terrible person. So of course I
was obsessed with him. He edited porn video trailers, which is actually a
thing.”
“I didn’t know that.”
“Good. Because they gave him ideas about sex that were fine, if you
knew what you were doing… which he didn’t.”
My grip on my cup tightened. I’d been fine up to the suggestion that
someone had hurt my wife. “Tell me.”
“Like, spank me. Make me crawl. Talk dirty all night long. All that shit
is fine, but he always took it a little too far. And I didn’t know better so I
figured, since it turned me on, then maybe he wasn’t going too far. But one
time?” She shook her head. “He ties me up and blindfolds me, which was
normal for us. And there’s this weird pause where he says he’s going to get
something. He leaves, and then he comes back and he’s real quiet. I feel
him get on the bed, but it doesn’t smell like him. He doesn’t breathe the
same and he’s about to do it, when I just said… no.”
She paused while I prepared myself to launch into a void of rage.
“He didn’t back away, so,” she said, matter-of-fact, “I scream loud
enough to bust an eardrum. Just this ‘Aaaah’ and the guy on the bed? He
doesn’t sound like Malcolm when he curses me. And so I scream ‘rape!’
over and over until Malcolm runs in and takes the blindfold off and yeah.
His buddy from the editing gig’s got a shriveling hard-on, trying to get his
leg in his pants.”
“Jesus.” One word. A prayer for calm in the face of a past horror I felt
the unproductive need to rectify. I could get Cooper to find this guy. Ruin
him. Twist his hands off at the wrists and leave bloody stumps that would
never tie another knot.
“Jesus was not in the room, trust me. Malcolm was all, ‘I thought it
would be fun, baby,’ and ‘Don’t you know your fucking safe word?’ His
buddy’s putting his pants on, like, ‘You said she was into it.’ So now
Malcolm’s real mad, talking about beating my ass raw… while I’m tied
up… and he doesn’t untie me until I threaten to scream again. And this is
when he calls me a crazy-ass bitch. And I know I am, but—”