Rankin124web
You also want an ePaper? Increase the reach of your titles
YUMPU automatically turns print PDFs into web optimized ePapers that Google loves.
I still have mornings that are a struggle for me. My life used to be<br />
80% some level of depression and 20% freedom. But I’d say it’s<br />
reversed now. That 20% is still there, but I have tools that help me<br />
process those thoughts and emotions. And I think maybe God has<br />
allowed that to remain so that I can be most effective as I empathize<br />
with others.<br />
As a Christian, and more specifically a pastor’s wife,<br />
what has it been like facing this darkness spiritually?<br />
That is a tough one. There was a lot of pressure there. In the<br />
beginning, I was young and I didn’t know what I was doing. I was so<br />
insecure. I was a Christian, but I was never really discipled. I didn’t feel<br />
like I had someone to walk through Scripture with me. I didn’t develop<br />
much spiritually in those early years. Looking back now, I realize<br />
Jesus was with me in the darkness even when I didn’t know what<br />
verse to quote or what to pray. He sustained me in those times.<br />
With depression, there’s a disconnect between what you know to<br />
be true and what you feel in your body. When that happens, it’s a<br />
shaming feeling and the enemy uses that. I had many beautiful<br />
people who loved me and showed up for me. Their sincere prayers<br />
supported me and I will forever be grateful to them. They know<br />
who they are (smile). But unfortunately, people can, and did, use<br />
their words and even used scripture to shame me. Some just wanted<br />
to step in and slap a Bible verse on me and stop my suffering and<br />
tears. But they didn’t know me.<br />
As the Body of Christ, we have the power to heal. That may look<br />
differently than most people have come to expect. We cannot put<br />
God in a box. The more we are able to really lean in and be with<br />
people in their pain and hold sacred space for their story the more<br />
healing we will witness.<br />
When I read scripture now, I see that Jesus himself was a sufferer.<br />
He felt the deepest most difficult emotions and there was no shame<br />
in that. David praised God in the psalms but he was also brutally<br />
honest about his suffering and his doubts. Yes, the scriptures say<br />
‘Don’t be afraid.’ But God was talking to people who were afraid. He<br />
wasn’t scolding them. There is a tenderness in His words. I interpret that<br />
as ‘Don’t fear because I’ve got you. You are mine.’<br />
A couple of my favorite verses are John 16:33 where Jesus says,<br />
‘In this world you will have tribulations, but take heart, I have<br />
overcome the world!’ And in 2 Corinthians 4:16-17 it says that it’s<br />
no wonder we don’t give up. For even though our outer person<br />
gradually wears out, our inner being is renewed every single day.<br />
We view our slight, short-lived troubles in the light of eternity. We<br />
see our difficulties as the substance that produces for us an eternal<br />
glory far beyond all comparison. I don’t want people to feel shamed<br />
by scriptures. I want them to be empowered by them! His Word is<br />
not generic and void of emotions. I want them to know that Jesus is<br />
near to the brokenhearted and He rescues those whose spirits are<br />
crushed. He makes provision. He’s okay with you not being okay. He<br />
can bring healing to your spirit, your soul, and your body and mind.<br />
IN THIS WORLD<br />
YOU WILL HAVE<br />
TRIBULATIONS,<br />
BUT TAKE HEART,<br />
I HAVE OVERCOME<br />
THE WORLD!<br />
JOHN 16:33<br />
Hometown RANKIN • 39