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Dear Mr. West
& fellow knitters,
You don’t know me. I’m just a peon in the knitting
world. I’ve only been knitting for 10 years or so, have
a silly little podcast with my sister, and a great group
of knitting friends found in the strangest of circumstances.
I was woefully unaware of who you were until recent
years. I am forever behind on trends, as easily
judged by the simple style of jeans and concert band
t-shirts I’ve been rocking for roughly 30 years. However,
I have a lovely group of knitting friends who
absolutely LOVE your work. So, due to their constant
pressure encouragement, I can now say, I have a
love/hate relationship with your work.
Dear Sir, do not consider this remotely a judgment
of your amazing, lovely, fun personality. You are
an absolute breath of fresh air, and your tutorial videos
are amazing. I am forever using your piece of
advice to “make it work” if you find yourself with an
extra stitch or two. Thanks to you I can now do an i-
cord cast on, and a few other tricks!
But kind sir, I have a question.
Why. Are. There. So. Many. Holes?
I said it. I did. I have tried about four of your patterns
(which I know is a drop in the bucket of your
work, people do not come for me!) I notice a trend of
quite large lacework holes in parts of the patterns.
Large enough for your finger to poke through, or if
you have such proclivities, a nipple slip! I do understand
lacework has its place. I love me a good yarnover
pattern for a small hole. But some of these holes
are a tad excessive. A small child’s hand could fit
through some of these. Some are so large
they might be a portal to another
dimension. How do you wear these
without ripping your work? I
presume others possess
some form of grace that I do
not, because I have visions
of walking through a
room in a rush, catching
my shawl on a
doorknob and as I’m slowly
strangled to death, in my
dying breath, I screech
“Curse you Stephen
West and your holes!”
*end scene*
Mr. West, I can honestly say that is my one and
only complaint thus far about your patterns. Now, I
know some folks are turned off by the vibrant and
sometimes clashing colors you may use. That’s a
“them” problem, not a “you” problem, because if you
as a knitter do not know that you can CHOOSE YOUR
OWN COLORS, well, then you have bigger fish to fry.
So, I can honestly say, “Thank you Mr. West.”
Thanks to my friends relentless badgering, daring,
and spiteful pressure encouragement, I now actually
do enjoy your patterns. I’ve learned to ignore color
choices, perhaps even only choosing 1-2 colors when
you may have 73. I’ve learned that your holes are
easily ignored and modified, and the result will still
be gorgeous. I’ve learned that when you have 3,920
stitches on a final row, you better use stitch markers.
I’ve also learned to use small stitch markers so that
they don’t move around by said yarnovers that make
said holes, lest you have holes that don’t line up with
other holes, and now you’re even more mad about
holes. I’ve learned that while many folks LOVE a good
mystery KAL, I do not. I will patiently wait until you
make multiple versions of your crazy but amazing
idea so I can see how everyone else did it, and then,
as you suggest, make it work for me.
Almost every knitter knows who you are, even
those who live under a rock like me. And one thing I
think everyone should learn from you is not to be
afraid. Don’t be afraid to try new things, change up
plans, modify, adjust, choose a different path, and
forge your own path. You won’t make everyone
happy; you aren’t tacos and a margarita.
So, while I will indeed continue to whine,
complain, and argue with my friends about
your designs, I will still try them.
I will keep knitting, and I will
make it work.
Maybe just maybe, if we all had
a little more Stephen West in us,
life would be a little more fun.
©Yo-Yo
Thanks for the designs,
sir! Even the
holey ones.
~~Little Sis
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