Songwriting Summer Camp 14-17 Year Olds

Songwriting Camp 2023
A M U S I C A L B Y F I G H T I N G
W O R D S P R O D U C T I O N S

Artists:
Cian
Ksenila
Riley
Grace
Seanán
Jemma
Nessa
Daniel
Tomas
Poppy
Saoirse
Emma
Evie
Wiktoria
3

LUAS: The Musical
Anything Can Happen on the Luas
4

Ideas for the genre
- Group 1: Rock, Classical, Italian, Jazz
- Group 2: Story genre, dark comedy, pop, rock, punk
- Group 3: Shrinkflation, hip hop, rock, indie
- Group 4: Heavy metal jazz, country Hozier (by a lesbian) –
Fanbase consists of lesbians
Ideas for the theme
- Group 1: Heartbreak
- Group 2: LUAS the Musical/Anything Could Happen on the
LUAS – Ensemble cast, different perspectives
- Group 3: Shrinkflation, guy going insane over it
- Someone struggling to write a song/musical
- Insomnia
- Group 4: Different narratives – Hozier-coded character that
listens to country, really bad musician – Comedy relief
- Right person wrong time – Romance
- Murder by sports injury – Dark comedy
Ideas for the story/plot
- Group 1: Holiday love met abroad, love at first sight, ghosted,
self-identity, Italian
- Group 2: Different characters, bicycle character, why they
are on the LUAS (songs), murder, ticket inspector trying to
find the murderer, actual LUAS shrinking
- Group 3: Guy going insane over shrinkflation
- Someone struggling to write a song/musical
- Group 4: Right person wrong time, sports injury, murder
5

Working Title: LUAS the Musical
Seanan: Shrinkflation guy; conspiracy theorist, aggressive, passionate
Saoirse: Giovanni; insufferable, eidetic memory, deeply in love
with Siobhan
Evie: Siobhan; oblivious, ditzy/silly, very affectionate, has a secret
admirer
Nessa: Ticket inspector/Detective; has integrity, sarcastic, inquisitive
Grace: Hosier (Country music duplicate); easily annoyed, arrogant,
self-important
Riley: Redser Harring (For the Murder) – wears baggy clothes
(easy to hide things), bad posture, shady
Kseniia: Zoë (Influencer); sharper than she presents, thinks highly
of herself, shady
Wiktoria: LUAS driver/Narrator
Poppy: Athlete – Bicycle character
Jemma: Lewis; aloof, entitled, not very bright, naive
Volunteers: Additional Characters, Outside the LUAS telling it to
stop
Ideas
Victim: Character 2 – Grief and heartbreak
Murderer: Influencer?
Doors shrink – Can’t get out
Doors won’t open for the main characters
6

What is the narrator telling us that the actors are not?
What happens at each station?
When do the murders happen?
How do all characters react to the murder?
How witness it?
How does the investigator find the murderer?
How does the play end?
Setting
LUAS Red Line:
Act One
Music
Ensemble – Song about the LUAS in general
Individual lines explaining why they are on the LUAS -Introduces
the characters
Example: Character thinking he was on the Green Line
Scene One
Busker playing accordion motif.
7

Narrator: Point Luas Platform. Busy with passengers gathered
waiting for the Luas at 8 am on a Monday after the holidays.
(Am – chord from murder on the red line underneath above intro
narration. Continues…)
People on the red line
Tryna get to work on time
People on the red line
Tryin not to lose their minds…
Passengers in conversation:
Giovanni: Dear where are we going?
Siobhan: Are you going?
Giovanni: No dear, where are WE going?
Siobhan: Actually, not sure, where are we going?
Giovanni: No, I remember, we’re going to your mother’s house
for a birthday celebration.
Siobhan: You remembered my birthday!
Giovanni: No, your mother’s birthday, honey.
8

Siobhan: Oh shnooptypoops, it’s my mother’s birthday?
Giovanni: I got her chrysanthemums, they’re her favourite flower.
Siobhan: Really?
Giovanni: Yes, honey, she told us that seventeen weeks ago.
Siobhan: That’s why I love you so much!
(giggles)
Opening Song: Mi Amor Schnoopshypoo by Saoirse and Evie
It’s an ecstasy of light
You brought into my life
You drive me insane
But you shine so bright
Giovanni
Te amo te amo te amo
All that we go through
We have a purpose
Together we’re chaos
But it’s worth it
Siobhán
9

Is breá liom tu, is breá liom tu
Te amo
Shrinkflation Guy Song - Seannán, Riley, Daniel and Tomás
The Yorkie bars are getting smaller
While the lies are getting taller
The Tayto bags are full of air
And the people just don’t seem to care
They don’t care
They don’t care
They don’t care
They don’t care
Shrinkflation guy (aggressively): Yorkie bars are getting smaller!
Hosier (country accent): Wow, partner, I didn’t know that before!
Nah, I’m being sarcastic, I don’t really care. Now scram.
(Shrinkflation guy starts to walks off, turns around, and comes
back and grasps Hosier’s shoulders.)
Shrinkflation guy: There’s more air in your bag of crisps. And
don’t get me started on Toblerones!
Hosier (in shock): …
10

Shrinkflation guy: It’s mad!
Hosier: So uhh, I do country songs.
Shrinkflation guy: Huh?
Hosier: Yeah, I’m Hosier.
Shrinkflation guy: Isn’t that your man with the hair?
Hosier: No, I’m Hosier, ssssssssssss.
Shrinkflation guy: It’s more or less the same thing.
Hosier: No, I don’t even know who Hozier is. Guitar me!
Stagehand rushes on stage to hand Hosier a guitar.
Hosier Song by Grace
I don’t want to be him
But maybe I am?
My chances are slim
That they’ll stop calling me a scam
Spoken: Ya know what, I’m done with this guitar.
(puts down guitar on platform)
11

But I AM HoSier
Yes I am…
Shrinkflation guy: Are you thick leaving your guitar unattended
at the LUAS stop?
(Hosier walks off to grab his guitar):
Redser’s Song by Seannán, Riley, Daniel and Tomás
Everybody snaps fingers as rhythm
Me name’s Red Harring, I’m a dodgy prick
I like to walk around with my hand on my ---
Getting the LUAS from A to B
Nail it down or it belongs to me
I’ll rob your bike
I’ll rob your car
Rob your house
Rob your guitar (grabs guitar)
Mess with me, I’ll make you dead
And that’s why they call me Red
(Redser Harring is grabbing the guitar, Zoë is going live on her
phone)
Zoë: I don’t think that’s yours.
12

Redser Harring: It’s not.
Zoë: I seen the guy with the long hair putting it there.
Redser Harring: He’s my mate.
Zoë: What’s his name?
Redser Harring: George.
Zoë: George? George what?
Redser Harring: George… George Washington.
Zoë: And, where’s he from?
Redser Harring: Tallaght.
Zoë: Why’s he going to Tallaght?
Redser Harring: To see his ma.
Zoë: You look a bit dodgy.
Redser Harring: You can’t judge a book by its cover.
13

Zoë: That’s literally my job, I’m an influencer.
Zoenation by Kseniia and Wiktoria
Good morning, my skin’s flawless
Follow list is just enormous
But no bigger than my secrets
You won’t see under my sweetness
Fillers are a mask
Haven’t aged like a fine cask
I eat meat around the clock
But I’m vegan on TikTok
Lewis on the LUAS by Jemma and Wiktoria
Lewis: Sir, can you stow my luggage for me?
Ticket Inspector: Excuse me? I’m a ticket inspector.
Lewis: Can you not make a special exception for me, I’m very
rich by the way.
Ticket Inspector: Am I supposed to know who you are?
Who takes my luggage?
Who takes my case?
Where is first class?
14

Don’t they know my face?
If only my limo hadn’t broke down
I’d already be halfway uptown!
This is outrageous, this is far from fine
I thought this was the Green Line
Wasn’t the LUAS named after me?
But now I feel it’s just a mockery
Lewis: Well, I can give you a small amount of money to do it.
Well actually, it would probably be a lot for you. You don’t look
like you make a lot of money.
Ticket Inspector: This is my life, how dare you?
Lewis: I could give you this jacket and you could reserve a nice
seat for me . . wink wink.
Ticket Inspector (murmurs): Maybe a throne?
Lewis: Yeah, that would be perfect!
Ticket Inspector (to crowd): Is he being serious right now?
Ticket Inspector Song by Nessa
(The couple waltzing in the background and then others join in.)
15

You hopped on the red line without care
Thinking you’re smooth, but I’m well aware
Oh what a shame, getting caught in the act
Claiming your innocence, it’s not fact
But hold on a sec, let me give you a clue
No ticket, no trip, that’s what you’ll go through
Go ahead, please, try excuses on me
I’ve heard them all, it’s just comedy
But now, my friend, let’s cut to the truth
No ticket, no passage, no fancy sleuth
My job’s to ensure the fare is paid
Not be swayed by stories you’ve made
On this LUAS of questions, I will embark
Inspecting your tickets, no journey too dark
The Point (O2)
Everyone gets on apart from the bicycle guy.
Siobhan: Shmooptypoops, I love you so much.
16

Giovanni: Honey, I love you more.
Tucked into each other, they go to sit down and bump into Hosier’s
guitar in the process. Hosier turns around and hits them
with the guitar.
Hosier: Hey, watch it! Oops.
Siobhan: You watch it, why do you even have that with you?
Hosier: Well I’m Hosier, ya see. I’m off to busk for a bit.
Giovanni: Isn’t Hozier a man?
Siobhan: Yeah, you can’t possibly be Hozier. For starters you’re
nobody and he’s famous.
Hoosier (visibly upset): I’m Hoosier with two O’s and an S. It’s
not the same at all.
Hoosier scoffs and walks away to take her seat. Giovanni and
Siobhan pause for a second before sitting down and snuggling
into each other’s space. Siobhan turns to lean against Giovanni,
putting her legs out into the aisle of the train, accidentally kicking
Redser Harring.
Redser: Ahh here, if you bump into me again, I’ll murder ye.
Piano motif. Redser Harring walks away.
Jervis Street
Train stops at Jervis. Man with a bike gets on.
17

Bike guy: Sorry, let me just get my bike on.
He accidentally hits Siobhan.
Siobhan: Hey! You can’t just bring this on here.
Bike guy: Mind your business. I’m an athlete! And this isn’t just
any bike, this is a Cammondale Supersix Evo Mod 2 with a Shimano
Alegra groupset.
Siobhan: You still can’t bring it on the LUAS!
Person trying to get on: Hey let me on!
Bike guy tries to move the bike but it’s stuck in the doors.
Narrator: Due to an incident, the doors have malfunctioned.
Please hang tight while we resolve this issue.
Everyone is enraged. The couple is oblivious. Redser gets annoyed
at them. Hosier asks the couple what happened. Bike guy
blames Siobhan, everyone blames Siobhan.
Heuston Station
Malfunctioning song.
Please let me in, please let me out
Please let me in, please let me out
18

We have other places to be, and
Other sights to see
(Inspector) Time’s running out,
(Hoosier) And so is my patience
(Shrinkflation) I need to leave
(Redser) I’ve no time for waiting
(Lewis) Can I go now?
(Siobhan) I can’t be staying
(Giovanni) Can the doors open now
(Zoe) There can’t be delaying
Please let me in, please let me out
Please let me in, please let me out
We have other places to be, and
Other sights to see
Hoosier: I have to busk!
Zoe: I have a date!
Giovanni: Her mother’s birthday!
Bike Guy: Football practice!
Lewis: I thought this was the green line!
19

Everyone looks at Lewis confused.
Inspector is going around asking everyone for tickets.
Inspector: Ticket or Leapcard, Ticket or Leapcard, Ticket or Leapcard…
Finds Siobhan’s body on a seat leaning against Gio’s shoulder.
Assumes she’s just sleeping.
Inspector: Hey, tell your girlfriend to wake up.
Pokes Siobhan. Giovanni, shocked, pulls Siobhan closer.
Siobhan’s body unfolds and falls to the ground. Now they can
see that she is dead.
Refrain: Murder on the Red Line
Murder on the blood red line
Murder on the Red line
I think we’re all gonna die
Giovanni: Oh no!!! My love, please wake up!
Agghhhh I remember how much she hated dying. Whoever did
this will pay.
Ticket Inspector: This is simply not up to code, I can’t allow it.
I will be finding the person responsible and holding them accountable.
Hosier (derisively): If ya’ll ask me, she had it coming. Criticising
everyone, calling them phony and a ‘nobody’.
20

Lewis: Well hold on, it’s not been that long since she passed,
couldn’t we just cryogenically freeze her until doctors find a way
to revive her?
Redser: I agree with the country wacko, she got what she deserved.
Zoe (live on social media): ZoeNation, I’m calling on you for support
in this difficult time. A woman has just sadly passed away
so post #PrayforSiobhan on your feeds, your stories, anywhere
you can to show support for her family and loved ones.
Giovanni’s Lament
Please let me out, please let me out
My Siobhani is dead
Her time has run out
There’s murder, murder about
We’ve been together
7 months, 15 days
Thought we’d be forever
Told her I’ll always stay
Spoken: I have to find whoever did this!
Please let me in, please let me in
21

Who would commit such a sin?
Your time is running out
(Ensemble): There’s a murderer about
Red Cow
Investigation into the murders by the ticket inspector
Accusations
Inspector hands Giovanni a tissue.
Giovanni: Gracias.
Ticket Inspector: … Sir, have you seen anything suspicious?
Giovanni: Suspic—She’s dead! The light of my life…
Ticket Inspector: Had she received any threats?
Giovanni: My sweetheart?
He dissolves into sobs. The ticket inspector moves on to Hoosier
who has her arms crossed.
Ticket Inspector: Did you see--?
Hoosier: Are you a hyped up middle-aged man? Why do you get
to ask the questions?

The ticket inspector gapes at her in shock.
Hoosier: Nah, I didn’t see anything. For all we know, you murdered
her.
Giovanni: It was you?!
Ticket Inspector: No! Just—
He turns to Redser.
Ticket Inspector: You! You said you were angry enough to kill, so
what do you have to say?
Redser: Are you thick?
Influencer: Ah, but it must be you! You’ve been stealing and
threatening people all morning!
All the passengers continue arguing and full chaos breaks out.
*Are you thick? It wasn’t me?*
Piano starts playing during the following dialogue and the singing
flows straight from the talking.
Redser: Are you thick it wasn’t me!
Zoe: Yes it was, oh can’t you see?

Redser: Are you thick it wasn’t ME!
Zoe: Oh, well… who do you think it could be?
Redser: I really think it could be Hoosier
Hoosier: Now why’re you all looking at me?
Redser: Well yeah you said crap to me!
(music stops)
Hoosier (mocking Redser’s accent): Are ya thick, it wasn’t me!
Everyone pauses.
Everyone (getting louder and louder): Are you thick it wasn’t
me! Are you thick it wasn’t me! Are you thick it wasn’t me! Are
you thick it wasn’t me!
Redser: Are you all taking the piss out of me, I can’t believe it…!
Pure, unintelligible, improvised yelling.
Ticket Inspector: STOPP!!!
Everyone on stage freezes.
24

Narrator: Next stop, Belgard Junction.
Belgard (Junction)
Second murder. Accidental this time.
Hoosier struts up to the influencer.
Hoosier: Howdy luvly lady. What’s a thing like you doing at a
place like this?
Influencer: Umm… someone’s been murdered?
Hoosier: You’re killing that look!
Influencer: K-Killing? But I’m not killing anything!
Hoosier: Well, you haven’t taken a life, but you sure have taken
my heart!
Influencer (flustered): I- umm…
Hoosier (moves into Influencer’s space): Where are you going
after this?
Influencer: Well…
She moves to lean on the door, but misses and pushes the bike
guy into a javelin that was sticking out of his bag. Murder piano
25

motif.
Influencer (to Hoosier): Wha—I—No. No, it was an accident, I
swear!
Tallaght
Narrator: We have now entered Tallaght.
Doors still aren’t opening, there’s commotion and screaming, the
inspector is phoning the GARDAI
Redser is pickpocketing and nicking items from people.
Redser (under his breath): Oh shit, he’s dead.
Redser walks away abruptly.
Inspector: Hey! I saw that!
He walks over to the cyclist, realises he’s dead.
Inspector: There’s been another murder! (he looks over at Redser)
It was you!
Redser: Why would I kill him?
Lewis: He’s not even well dressed, anything could happen on the
LUAS, look at his bike.
26

Giovanni (hysterically crying, angry): I saw you try to take his
bike, now that I think about it… (screaming now) You killed my
girlfriend! I’m going to kill you.
Everyone freezes exactly in their poses.
Narrator: So, clearly things have gotten quite out of hand. Let’s
all just take a moment to review. Siobhan annoyed every single
person on the train, giving them all a potential reason to harm
her. Zoe, a paranoid, insecure, rather irrelevant social media
personality went far enough to actually act on her fear. The ticket
inspector tried to approach the situation rationally, but the
crowd proved that the LUAS isn’t the place for rational thought.
After everyone was accused of some harm or another, an even
more ridiculous murder occurred. This of course didn’t do anything
to relieve the terror and outrage. We now return to baseless
accusations being thrown around.
The action resumes.
Redser: I didn’t do anything, I swear! I’m just a man of opportunity
and he didn’t have any more use for the bike, why should it
go to waste?
Hoosier: If everybody could just listen for a moment, I think a
song would really help put things into perspective.
She goes to start playing her guitar. Shrinkflation guy knocks it
out of her hands.
Shrinkflation guy: We don’t need a song, whatever-your-nameis!
Hoysher: It’s Hoysher! With an O and a Y and a SSSSSHER!
27

Shrinkflation: I DON’T CARE! We need to deal with the truly
pressing issue, why is everything getting SMALLER!
Zoe: Is my follower count getting smaller? This can’t be happening.
I did everything I could to protect my secret, that has to
count for something!
Hoysher: Nobody cares about your following!
Ticket Inspector: Wait, hold on. You did everything to protect
your secret? What secret and what did you do?
Zoe: Ugghh fine…
*Confession Song*
Yes, I’m guilty, and?
Sometimes people get
Murdered on a train
At 8 am and what?
She saw me on my break
I was eating steak
What I supposed to do
To keep me safe!
So I took this needle
Poison on its end
28

Ten to fifteen minutes
You. Are. Dead.
All my life I’ve always been an image,
Nothing more
Which angle’s the best,
Which meal I should skip
I’m a shining star, leading people through life
Polished like a vase, pressured like hot glass
And what it led me to?
I’m sorry, not sorry, am I sorry
I might be caught in jail
But at least I’ll have my fame
I might be a fraud
But I’ll never lie again
And you say that you know me
From what you see online
It’s something I’ll never tell,
The story of my life
I’ve tried to feel shame
But I don’t
Because now you know my name
29

And that’s all I care about
(Chorus)
At least she’s pretty, she’ll be famous in jail (x4)
(Zoe)
At least I’m pretty, I’ll be famous in jail.
Ticket Inspector: Well, well, well. Looks like another successful
case solved.
Lewis: You did absolutely nothing. Myself on the other hand, I
was crucial to the truth being uncovered.
The ticket inspector shakes his head. He pulls Zoe up and forces
her over to a seat, blocking her in so she can’t get away.
Ticket Inspector: The GARDAI are on their way, let’s all just wait
and let them deal with this when they arrive.
Refrain: Murder on the Blood Red Line (x4)
Narrator: Following these events, Zoe was charged with 1 st degree
murder and manslaughter. She is now facing 40 years in
jail but #FreeZoe has gone viral. The ticket inspector finally got
a promotion for all his hard work. Giovanni continues to grieve
his beloved. Lewis’s limo was promptly repaired, allowing him
to never ride the LUAS again. Shrinkflation guy made a Youtube
video about how Zoe’s motive was actually to stop shrinkflation.
And Hoysher remains irrelevant despite her best efforts.
30