Descent (Black Heart Romance presents Heaven & Hell)

But there are brush strokes that don’t quite seem to fit that picture, too.
If he’s a mean, angry man who means to bully me and bend me until I break, then he’s the kind of
asshole there are tons of in the world, decidedly unspecial. And even though I know it will mean I
have to go through hell over something that was done to me, maybe I should shoulder that burden and
go to the police. Even if his expensive lawyers let him skate and he never has to pay for what he’s
done, I would have a record of harassment started. I could file a restraining order. He could be
literally dangerous, after all. Angry men kill women all the time.
Maybe it’s crazy to imagine he might be any other kind of asshole, but there’s an odd gentleness
in the way he’s handling me despite the brutal force he’s trying to exert.
I don’t know.
Something feels off, just not quite what I expect.
Seeking to understand where that’s coming from, I hold his gaze and press deeper. “But how will
you feel if I don’t show up?”
He cocks his head and watches me, almost like he’s trying to figure me out while I’m doing the
same to him. “Hypothetically?”
I roll my eyes and humor him. “Sure.”
His gaze drifts for a few seconds as he thinks, then meets mine again. “Bereft.”
I take a deep breath, unprepared for that answer.
Bereft.
That’s much closer to disappointment than anger.
It certainly doesn’t imply he views me as disposable or easily replaced.
Sure, he could be lying, but he seems pretty adamant about his honesty, and I can’t deny he has
been honest about things most people never would.
For a split second, I feel conflicted.
My first instinct today was to get him away from me, of course. But right now, in this moment,
talking to him and actually trying to get at the core of who he is…
I don’t hate it.
My lack of relief a moment ago flits across my mind. Is it possible I didn’t feel relieved when he
told me he would leave because… some part of me doesn’t actually want him to?
No.
That’s sick.
It can’t be that.