Focus on the Family Magazine - June/July 2023
It can be a struggle to raise a family while balancing your work life, social life and relationships. Focus on the Family magazine is here to help! Each complimentary issue delivers fresh, practical Biblical guidance on family and life topics. Every issue comes packed with relevant advice to build up your kids, strengthen your marriage, navigate entertainment and culture, and handle common challenges you may face in your marriage and parenting journeys. Plus you'll find seasonal advice ranging from back-to-school activities to date night tips for you and your spouse.
It can be a struggle to raise a family while balancing your work life, social life and relationships. Focus on the Family magazine is here to help! Each complimentary issue delivers fresh, practical Biblical guidance on family and life topics.
Every issue comes packed with relevant advice to build up your kids, strengthen your marriage, navigate entertainment and culture, and handle common challenges you may face in your marriage and parenting journeys. Plus you'll find seasonal advice ranging from back-to-school activities to date night tips for you and your spouse.
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COUPLES / INVESTING IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP<br />
balancing act<br />
Prioritizing your marriage during <strong>the</strong> parenting years<br />
BY GARY THOMAS ILLUSTRATIONS BY MICHAEL MEISTER<br />
WHEN MY FIRST CHILD<br />
WAS BORN, I felt miraculous<br />
love and overwhelming terror. What<br />
did I know about raising a baby? My<br />
immediate obsessi<strong>on</strong> was her physical<br />
safety, beginning with <strong>the</strong> perilous<br />
drive home from <strong>the</strong> hospital. It was<br />
<strong>on</strong>ly about 3 miles, but that day <strong>the</strong> trip<br />
took 20 minutes. No telling how slippery<br />
a completely dry road might be<br />
when your firstborn child is nestled in<br />
<strong>the</strong> back seat.<br />
Fast-forward a decade or so, and I<br />
was flinging my children into <strong>the</strong> air<br />
in <strong>the</strong> pool. As parents, we eventually<br />
realize that our children aren’t as fragile<br />
as we initially thought <strong>the</strong>y were.<br />
That’s a good thing because we also<br />
need to give some of our attenti<strong>on</strong> to<br />
our spouses. If we focus <strong>on</strong>ly <strong>on</strong> our<br />
parenting, our marriages can end up<br />
weakened through neglect.<br />
A healthy balance is needed between<br />
<strong>the</strong> attenti<strong>on</strong> we give to parenting and<br />
what we give to our marriages. To help<br />
you find your footing in this balancing<br />
act, here are two questi<strong>on</strong>s you and<br />
your spouse can ask yourselves:<br />
What are we<br />
going to cut out?<br />
When I ask first-time expectant couples<br />
to c<strong>on</strong>sider this questi<strong>on</strong>, <strong>the</strong>y w<strong>on</strong>der<br />
what I mean.<br />
“You’ll spend 20 to 30 hours a week<br />
parenting,” I explain, “but you w<strong>on</strong>’t<br />
be given any extra hours in your day.<br />
Something has to give. So be deliberate<br />
about <strong>the</strong> changes you make and<br />
decide what you can cut out of your<br />
schedules.”<br />
After <strong>the</strong> birth of <strong>the</strong>ir first child,<br />
Debra and John realized that <strong>the</strong><br />
schedule <strong>the</strong>y kept as a young married<br />
couple wouldn’t work for <strong>the</strong>m as<br />
parents. When <strong>the</strong>ir third child came<br />
al<strong>on</strong>g, John made a bold decisi<strong>on</strong>: He<br />
found an office job five minutes from<br />
home so he could drive home for lunch,<br />
and he now works just three days a<br />
week. Debra works as a counselor, so<br />
32 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA JUNE / JULY <strong>2023</strong>