quiet-the-power-of-introverts-in-a-world-that-cant-stop-talking-susan-cain

17.03.2023 Views

performing under pressure. If she’sdrawn to activities that require performance,though, you can help herthrive.When I was a kid, I loved figure skating.I could spend hours on the rink,tracing figure eights, spinning happily,or flying through the air. But on theday of my competitions, I was a wreck.I hadn’t slept the night before andwould often fall during moves that Ihad sailed through in practice. At first Ibelieved what people told me—that Ihad the jitters, just like everybody else.But then I saw a TV interview with theOlympic gold medalist Katarina Witt.She said that pre-competition nervesgave her the adrenaline she needed towin the gold.I knew then that Katarina and I wereutterly different creatures, but it tookme decades to figure out why. Her740/929

nerves were so mild that they simplyenergized her, while mine were constrictingenough to make me choke. Atthe time, my very supportive motherquizzed the other skating moms abouthow their own daughters handled precompetitionanxiety, and came backwith insights that she hoped wouldmake me feel better. Kristen’s nervoustoo, she reported. Renée’s mom says she’sscared the night before a competition. ButI knew Kristen and Renée well, and Iwas certain that they weren’t asfrightened as I was.I think it might have helped if I’d understoodmyself better back then. Ifyou’re the parent of a would-be figureskater, help her to accept that she hasheavy-duty jitters without giving herthe idea that they’re fatal to success.What she’s most afraid of is failing publicly.She needs to desensitize herself to741/929

nerves were so mild that they simply

energized her, while mine were constricting

enough to make me choke. At

the time, my very supportive mother

quizzed the other skating moms about

how their own daughters handled precompetition

anxiety, and came back

with insights that she hoped would

make me feel better. Kristen’s nervous

too, she reported. Renée’s mom says she’s

scared the night before a competition. But

I knew Kristen and Renée well, and I

was certain that they weren’t as

frightened as I was.

I think it might have helped if I’d understood

myself better back then. If

you’re the parent of a would-be figure

skater, help her to accept that she has

heavy-duty jitters without giving her

the idea that they’re fatal to success.

What she’s most afraid of is failing publicly.

She needs to desensitize herself to

741/929

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