quiet-the-power-of-introverts-in-a-world-that-cant-stop-talking-susan-cain
“dispositional opposite.” Thorne’s teamtaped the conversations and asked theparticipants to listen to a playbacktape.This process revealed some surprisingfindings. The introverts and extrovertsparticipated about equally, giving thelie to the idea that introverts alwaystalk less. But the introvert pairs tendedto focus on one or two serious subjectsof conversation, while the extrovertpairs chose lighter-hearted and widerrangingtopics. Often the introverts discussedproblems or conflicts in theirlives: school, work, friendships, and soon. Perhaps because of this fondness for“problem talk,” they tended to adoptthe role of adviser, taking turns counselingeach other on the problem athand. The extroverts, by contrast, weremore likely to offer casual informationabout themselves that established676/929
commonality with the other person:You have a new dog? That’s great. Afriend of mine has an amazing tank ofsaltwater fish!But the most interesting part ofThorne’s experiment was how much thetwo types appreciated each other. Introvertstalking to extroverts chose cheeriertopics, reported making conversationmore easily, and described conversingwith extroverts as a “breath of freshair.” In contrast, the extroverts felt thatthey could relax more with introvertpartners and were freer to confide theirproblems. They didn’t feel pressure tobe falsely upbeat.These are useful pieces of social information.Introverts and extrovertssometimes feel mutually put off, butThorne’s research suggests how mucheach has to offer the other. Extrovertsneed to know that introverts—who677/929
- Page 625 and 626: exchange for being ourselves the re
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- Page 629 and 630: Professor Little knows all too well
- Page 631 and 632: Double pneumonia and an overschedul
- Page 633 and 634: to see the world in a more negative
- Page 635 and 636: great excitement and mutual admirat
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- Page 643 and 644: than the introverts, and this was i
- Page 645 and 646: Greg feels hurt that she makes an e
- Page 647 and 648: a career change. “I think we’d
- Page 649 and 650: wanted to deliver her newscompassio
- Page 651 and 652: disagree, her voice gets quiet and
- Page 653 and 654: Do they also like each other a litt
- Page 655 and 656: “Very nice, keep up the good work
- Page 657 and 658: manager, while 71 percent accepted
- Page 659 and 660: wrong. The cobra vows to stop immed
- Page 661 and 662: have repair work to do with their p
- Page 663 and 664: horrible, on some level she process
- Page 665 and 666: study felt warmly toward their fell
- Page 667 and 668: try to tap into my empathy,” he s
- Page 669 and 670: the shoes of their conversational p
- Page 671 and 672: does. It requires a kind of mental
- Page 673 and 674: socially. It doesn’t show us how
- Page 675: increased territory sales 500 perce
- Page 679 and 680: to the point where I could walk int
- Page 681 and 682: a way to break their stalemate. Ins
- Page 683 and 684: 11ON COBBLERS AND GENERALSHow to Cu
- Page 685 and 686: separate occasions. Each time, the
- Page 687 and 688: always reading,” says Dr. Miller
- Page 689 and 690: Take the case of Joyce and her seve
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- Page 693 and 694: Isabel wants to hang out alone in h
- Page 695 and 696: Why would you want to do that?thoug
- Page 697 and 698: child fit if she’d been an introv
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- Page 703 and 704: new people, but also to new places
- Page 705 and 706: the safety of the dunes, and neithe
- Page 707 and 708: Above all, do not shame her for her
- Page 709 and 710: principals and guidance counselors,
- Page 711 and 712: It’s a Tuesday morning in October
- Page 713 and 714: But not all of them. When you seeth
- Page 715 and 716: She opens her mouth to speak, butlo
- Page 717 and 718: calm atmosphere where she could wor
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- Page 721 and 722: school memory is of being made tost
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“dispositional opposite.” Thorne’s team
taped the conversations and asked the
participants to listen to a playback
tape.
This process revealed some surprising
findings. The introverts and extroverts
participated about equally, giving the
lie to the idea that introverts always
talk less. But the introvert pairs tended
to focus on one or two serious subjects
of conversation, while the extrovert
pairs chose lighter-hearted and widerranging
topics. Often the introverts discussed
problems or conflicts in their
lives: school, work, friendships, and so
on. Perhaps because of this fondness for
“problem talk,” they tended to adopt
the role of adviser, taking turns counseling
each other on the problem at
hand. The extroverts, by contrast, were
more likely to offer casual information
about themselves that established
676/929