quiet-the-power-of-introverts-in-a-world-that-cant-stop-talking-susan-cain
Some children, it turns out, feel a lotmore guilty about their (supposed)transgression than others. They lookaway, hug themselves, stammer outconfessions, hide their faces. And it’sthe kids we might call the most sensitive,the most high-reactive, the oneswho are likely to be introverts who feelthe guiltiest. Being unusually sensitiveto all experience, both positive andnegative, they seem to feel both thesorrow of the woman whose toy isbroken and the anxiety of having donesomething bad. (In case you’re wondering,the woman in the experimentsquickly returned to the room with thetoy “fixed” and reassurances that thechild had done nothing wrong.)In our culture, guilt is a tainted word,but it’s probably one of the buildingblocks of conscience. The anxiety thesehighly sensitive toddlers feel upon406/929
apparently breaking the toy gives themthe motivation to avoid harmingsomeone’s plaything the next time. Byage four, according to Kochanska, thesesame kids are less likely than theirpeers to cheat or break rules, even whenthey think they can’t be caught. And bysix or seven, they’re more likely to bedescribed by their parents as havinghigh levels of moral traits such as empathy.They also have fewer behavioralproblems in general.“Functional, moderate guilt,” writesKochanska, “may promote future altruism,personal responsibility, adaptivebehavior in school, and harmonious,competent, and prosocial relationshipswith parents, teachers, and friends.”This is an especially important set of attributesat a time when a 2010University of Michigan study showsthat college students today are 40407/929
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- Page 367 and 368: Esther managed to solve her problem
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- Page 381 and 382: At the same time, many told Eleanor
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- Page 399 and 400: was distracting. But Aron had a gre
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- Page 405: was Eleanor who made sure he knewho
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- Page 411 and 412: some evidence that sociopaths haved
- Page 413 and 414: they camouflage signs of a nervous
- Page 415 and 416: supercool pulse rate during liftoff
- Page 417 and 418: intentionally,” Dijk speculates,
- Page 419 and 420: In other words, you want to makesur
- Page 421 and 422: [other type] is to be first, withou
- Page 423 and 424: while the other 80 percent are “f
- Page 425 and 426: by those farther up the food chain
- Page 427 and 428: The interesting thing is that these
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- Page 435 and 436: suitcase through a midnight airport
- Page 437 and 438: tirelessly promote the movie. He vi
- Page 439 and 440: The atmosphere is startling simplyb
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- Page 443 and 444: putting myself to sleep. I wonder i
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- Page 447 and 448: 7WHY DID WALL STREET CRASH ANDWARRE
- Page 449 and 450: “Hi, Janice!” said the caller t
- Page 451 and 452: same thing happened: the bailout st
- Page 453 and 454: But sometimes we’re too sensitive
- Page 455 and 456: after the deal was struck, a headli
apparently breaking the toy gives them
the motivation to avoid harming
someone’s plaything the next time. By
age four, according to Kochanska, these
same kids are less likely than their
peers to cheat or break rules, even when
they think they can’t be caught. And by
six or seven, they’re more likely to be
described by their parents as having
high levels of moral traits such as empathy.
They also have fewer behavioral
problems in general.
“Functional, moderate guilt,” writes
Kochanska, “may promote future altruism,
personal responsibility, adaptive
behavior in school, and harmonious,
competent, and prosocial relationships
with parents, teachers, and friends.”
This is an especially important set of attributes
at a time when a 2010
University of Michigan study shows
that college students today are 40
407/929
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