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156 THE GOD DELUSION

maybe the elusive crane that cosmologists seek will be a version of

Darwin's idea itself: either Smolin's model or something similar. Or

maybe it will be the multiverse plus anthropic principle espoused by

Martin Rees and others. It may even be a superhuman designer -

but, if so, it will most certainly not be a designer who just popped

into existence, or who always existed. If (which I don't believe for

a moment) our universe was designed, and a fortiori if the designer

reads our thoughts and hands out omniscient advice, forgiveness and

redemption, the designer himself must be the end product of some

kind of cumulative escalator or crane, perhaps a version of

Darwinism in another universe.

The last-ditch defence by my critics in Cambridge was attack.

My whole world-view was condemned as 'nineteenth-century'. This

is such a bad argument that I almost omitted to mention it. But

regrettably I encounter it rather frequently. Needless to say, to call

an argument nineteenth-century is not the same as explaining what

is wrong with it. Some nineteenth-century ideas were very good

ideas, not least Darwin's own dangerous idea. In any case, this particular

piece of namecalling seemed a bit rich coming, as it did,

from an individual (a distinguished Cambridge geologist, surely

well advanced along the Faustian road to a future Templeton Prize)

who justified his own Christian belief by invoking what he called

the historicity of the New Testament. It was precisely in the

nineteenth century that theologians, especially in Germany, called

into grave doubt that alleged historicity, using the evidence-based

methods of history to do so. This was, indeed, swiftly pointed out

by the theologians at the Cambridge conference.

In any case, I know the 'nineteenth-century' taunt of old. It goes

with the 'village atheist' gibe. It goes with 'Contrary to what you

seem to think Ha Ha Ha we don't believe in an old man with a long

white beard any more Ha Ha Ha.' All three jokes are code for

something else, just as, when I lived in America in the late 1960s,

'law and order' was politicians' code for anti-black prejudice.*

What, then, is the coded meaning of 'You are so nineteenth-century'

in the context of an argument about religion? It is code for: 'You

are so crude and unsubtle, how could you be so insensitive and illmannered

as to ask me a direct, point-blank question like "Do you

believe in miracles?" or "Do you believe Jesus was born of a

* In Britain 'inner cities' had the equivalent coded meaning, prompting Auberon

Waugh's wickedly hilarious reference to 'inner cities of both sexes'.

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