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CHAPTER XX. AT THE HOUSE IN GREATPORTLAND STREETreturned, and the knocking was resumed. There was anattempt to push something under the door–a blue paper.Then in a fit of irritation I rose and went and flung thedoor wide open. ’Now then?’ said I."It was my landlord, with a notice of ejectment orsomething. He held it out to me, saw something oddabout my hands, I expect, and lifted his eyes to my face."For a moment he gaped. Then he gave a sort of inarticulatecry, dropped candle and writ together, and wentblundering down the dark passage to the stairs. I shutthe door, locked it, and went to the looking-glass. ThenI understood his terror.... My face was white–like whitestone."But it was all horrible. I had not expected the suffering.A night of racking anguish, sickness and fainting. Iset my teeth, though my skin was presently afire, all mybody afire; but I lay there like grim death. I understoodnow how it was the cat had howled until I chloroformedit. Lucky it was I lived alone and untended in my room.There were times when I sobbed and groaned and talked.But I stuck to it.... I became insensible and woke languidin the darkness."The pain had passed. I thought I was killing myself178
CHAPTER XX. AT THE HOUSE IN GREATPORTLAND STREETand I did not care. I shall never forget that dawn, and thestrange horror of seeing that my hands had become asclouded glass, and watching them grow clearer and thinneras the day went by, until at last I could see the sicklydisorder of my room through them, though I closed mytransparent eyelids. My limbs became glassy, the bonesand arteries faded, vanished, and the little white nerveswent last. I gritted my teeth and stayed there to the end.At last only the dead tips of the fingernails remained, pallidand white, and the brown stain of some acid upon myfingers."I struggled up. At first I was as incapable as a swathedinfant–stepping with limbs I could not see. I was weakand very hungry. I went and stared at nothing in myshaving-glass, at nothing save where an attenuated pigmentstill remained behind the retina of my eyes, fainterthan mist. I had to hang on to the table and press myforehead against the glass."It was only by a frantic effort of will that I draggedmyself back to the apparatus and completed the process."I slept during the forenoon, pulling the sheet over myeyes to shut out the light, and about midday I was awakenedagain by a knocking. My strength had returned. I179
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CHAPTER XX. AT THE HOUSE IN GREAT
PORTLAND STREET
and I did not care. I shall never forget that dawn, and the
strange horror of seeing that my hands had become as
clouded glass, and watching them grow clearer and thinner
as the day went by, until at last I could see the sickly
disorder of my room through them, though I closed my
transparent eyelids. My limbs became glassy, the bones
and arteries faded, vanished, and the little white nerves
went last. I gritted my teeth and stayed there to the end.
At last only the dead tips of the fingernails remained, pallid
and white, and the brown stain of some acid upon my
fingers.
"I struggled up. At first I was as incapable as a swathed
infant–stepping with limbs I could not see. I was weak
and very hungry. I went and stared at nothing in my
shaving-glass, at nothing save where an attenuated pigment
still remained behind the retina of my eyes, fainter
than mist. I had to hang on to the table and press my
forehead against the glass.
"It was only by a frantic effort of will that I dragged
myself back to the apparatus and completed the process.
"I slept during the forenoon, pulling the sheet over my
eyes to shut out the light, and about midday I was awakened
again by a knocking. My strength had returned. I
179