The Love Hypothesis by Ali Hazelwood

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Olive nodded again. When a single tear managed to slidedown her cheek, she decided to let it be.Forty-five minutes later, she and Malcolm sat on theirminuscule couch, arms pressed together, watching reruns ofAmerican Ninja Warrior while they ate a very undersaltedveggie casserole.
Adam Carlsen and I have absolutely nothing inHYPOTHESIS:and having coffee with him will be twice as painful ascommon,Chapter Foura root canal. Without anesthesia.Olive arrived to the first fake-dating Wednesday late and in thefoulest of moods, after a morning spent growling at her cheap,knockoff reagents for not dissolving, then not precipitating,then not sonicating, then not being enough for her to run herentire assay.She paused outside the coffee shop’s door and took a deepbreath. She needed a better lab if she wanted to produce decentscience. Better equipment. Better reagents. Better bacteriacultures. Better everything. Next week, when Tom Bentonarrived, she had to be on top of her game. She needed toprepare her spiel, not waste time on a coffee she didn’tparticularly want, with a person she most definitely didn’twant to talk to, halfway through her experimental protocol.Ugh.When she stepped inside the café, Adam was already there,wearing a black Henley that looked like it was ideated,designed, and produced specifically with the upper half of hisbody in mind. Olive was momentarily bemused, not so muchthat his clothes fit him well, but that she’d noticed whatsomeone was wearing to begin with. It was not like her. She’dbeen seeing Adam traipse around the biology building for thebetter part of two years, after all, not to mention that in thepast couple of weeks they’d spoken an inordinate amount oftimes. They had even kissed, if one counted what hadhappened on The Night as a proper kiss. It was dizzying and a
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Praise for The Love Hypothesis“Co
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To my women in STEM: Kate, Caitie,
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Chapter FourteenChapter FifteenChap
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Olive squeaked. She tried to open h
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“Neither are eyes.”Humph. Good
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“Are you planning to enroll?” h
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She could hear his smile.“I’ll
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When given a choice between A (a sl
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to be held for any length of time,
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feature of humanity, could never un
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good night.”“Wait!” She leane
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“But it wasn’t my worst, either
Page 28: Any rumor regarding my love life wi
Page 32 and 33: “Dr. Carlsen.”Dammit, dammit, d
Page 34 and 35: she could find, petrified. She was
Page 36 and 37: horrible at it, which meant that ea
Page 38 and 39: ago—and Olive immediately underst
Page 40: “Oh. Oh, no.” That would be way
Page 43 and 44: caught Anh kissing Adam Carlsen, sh
Page 45: that she didn’t even flip her off
Page 48 and 49: “I cannot believe it.”“Believ
Page 50 and 51: This was the worst. The absolute wo
Page 52 and 53: It was true that Anh had seemed hap
Page 54 and 55: seemed insane.“You mean . . . for
Page 56 and 57: probably whacked someone on the hea
Page 58 and 59: “What do people who are dating do
Page 60: over you and am not involved in you
Page 63 and 64: “About you.”“Oh.” Olive’s
Page 65 and 66: “Though, I’ve been thinking abo
Page 67 and 68: sexual intercourse between the two
Page 69 and 70: “For this to work we should proba
Page 71: talk about. Their ten-minute coffee
Page 74 and 75: “The relationship, it’s fake. W
Page 76 and 77: “I have, haven’t I? Did I ever
Page 80 and 81: little unsettling, the realization
Page 82 and 83: Olive smiled back, gesturing at Ada
Page 84 and 85: herring for breakfast on the reg. M
Page 87 and 88: WAS LATE for her second fake-dating
Page 89 and 90: “I worked.”They got in line to
Page 91 and 92: department chair this morning. He
Page 93 and 94: “Is that so?”“Mmm.”His mout
Page 95 and 96: “The time difference screwed me u
Page 97 and 98: that he wasn’t planning to. Olive
Page 99 and 100: “That is, I, um . . . never put t
Page 101 and 102: “What kind of question is that?
Page 103 and 104: “Who?”“Tom,” Adam said, a t
Page 105 and 106: Olive had no idea he was giving a t
Page 107: Adam laughed silently just as Tom s
Page 110 and 111: “Hey—sorry.” She gestured in
Page 112 and 113: Because millions of dollars in rese
Page 114 and 115: torso. He didn’t say anything but
Page 116 and 117: pitch her voice. “Or do you maybe
Page 118 and 119: Cherie just standing there, chattin
Page 120 and 121: “Because you moved the truck. I
Page 122 and 123: this time with the sleeve of his sh
Page 124 and 125: “The— Oh.” Adam rolled his ey
Page 127 and 128: with an uneasy expression and start
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“Yeah, well.” He stood and walk
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Olive: Did you just fail Greg?trick
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In the back seat Olive and Jeremy e
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a six-pack?”Jeremy blinked. “Mi
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1.5. Okay, I don’t like this. Jer
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had a choice. Any choice. Especiall
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“So.” Her mouth was dry. “Thi
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She pinched him lightly on the unde
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Adam nodded, Tom spun around and he
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“What? No.”“Because that’s
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“Should you be having caffeine at
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“Can’t stand chocolate.”Olive
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He glared, but she was starting to
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“There are things you can do abou
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the person she loved the most, but
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He nodded, thoughtful. “You’re
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jeans. “We’re friends. We weren
Page 169 and 170:
Olive: Tom just invited me to your
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she’d sent. “To make sure I und
Page 173 and 174:
Once they were in Adam’s car—a
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Adam was still around. The reason s
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“I will if you get pumpkin stuff.
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“It literally takes ten minutes.
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you need to get over it. For scienc
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Chapter TenHYPOTHESIS: If I fall in
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the whole idea was idiotic and a ca
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added begrudgingly, “he’s not n
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noticeably different from the Adam
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“Ol.”“How would that conversa
Page 196 and 197:
The lie rolled off her tongue like
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It was all Olive could do not to le
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Olive looked at Adam, expecting him
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“Not sure. Not sure Holden knows,
Page 204 and 205:
She paused right in front of his ch
Page 206 and 207:
“We could, like, sleep in on Sund
Page 208 and 209:
Olive: Well, TSA is notoriously inc
Page 210 and 211:
“Adam being gone. Hell, even I mi
Page 212 and 213:
“But I could tell you so many jui
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stricken and frantic. “I can’t.
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crap her pants. “Right.” Olive
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“Well.” He fidgeted with the ca
Page 220 and 221:
“You’re not mad, right?”“I
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Possibilities. That’s what Adam
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them. I do hate that I love them, t
Page 226 and 227:
Could room.With him.Olive knew full
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She huffed, crossing her arms over
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“No.” She winced.“Is it the p
Page 232 and 233:
“Adam, I’m pretty sure that if
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me to cry under the shower?”“Th
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to my professional career, general
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“Hey.” Olive forced her face in
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“What is it?”“Calories. To fu
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She rolled her eyes. “For Dr. Asl
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It didn’t go perfectly, either. S
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friends, but maybe she could buy hi
Page 248 and 249:
“A pretty girl like you should kn
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to spending more time with you next
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“Nothing.” Her voice shook. It
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“It’s not what they say. It’s
Page 256 and 257:
“And I keynote-spoke.” He grabb
Page 258 and 259:
“Um . . . I’m wearing heels, he
Page 260 and 261:
She moved closer to him and grasped
Page 262 and 263:
“It’s appalling.”“—or the
Page 264 and 265:
like having a thousand little splin
Page 266 and 267:
well on her way to wasted by that p
Page 268 and 269:
“An obscenity, isn’t it? It’s
Page 270 and 271:
“For a moment there, during the t
Page 272 and 273:
“The opposite of discipline and h
Page 274 and 275:
Adam shook his head. “He wanted a
Page 276 and 277:
all of it, maybe it was always goin
Page 278 and 279:
“Olive.” He sighed heavily, clo
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It was a little embarrassing, the a
Page 283 and 284:
studying her, it brooked no self-co
Page 285 and 286:
“No.” He shook his head. “Not
Page 287 and 288:
And I bet you do this all the time,
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—IT TOOK HER the longest time to
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Yes.“Fuck,” someone said. It wa
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orgasm, and the taut stretch of it,
Page 295 and 296:
“Inside you?”“If you—”Ada
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Oh. Maybe, now that they had sex—
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“What?” She gasped and freed he
Page 302 and 303:
finally belonging that seemed to ge
Page 304 and 305:
Slowly, precisely, she wrapped her
Page 306 and 307:
“The book you’re reading. With
Page 308 and 309:
“Who needs to know how to say ‘
Page 310 and 311:
He rolled his tongue inside his che
Page 312 and 313:
“Okay.” She leaned forward and
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who hugged her and started talking
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“He was shameless, Ol. And glorio
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It was an even fancier hotel, and O
Page 322 and 323:
about Malcolm’s elbows. Holden ha
Page 324 and 325:
A beat. Adam studied her, patient a
Page 326 and 327:
“Right,” he said. “Right.”
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“It was good, wasn’t it?” Oli
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Tom Fucking Benton take credit for
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“Fine,” Anh huffed. “Malcolm,
Page 335 and 336:
recording of Tom Benton saying shit
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only one bed in this hotel room was
Page 339 and 340:
“I haven’t.”“Yes, Ol, you h
Page 341 and 342:
Right. What about Tom, precisely? O
Page 343 and 344:
Holden sighed. “This is why Adam
Page 345 and 346:
Chapter TwentyHYPOTHESIS: People wh
Page 347 and 348:
In a lie.A lie, after a lot of lies
Page 349 and 350:
Olive closed her eyes and nodded, t
Page 351 and 352:
Cherie’s truck, and she almost la
Page 353:
Wearing expired contact lenses will
Page 356 and 357:
“Good,” he replied with a half
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“Uh . . .” Adam’s frown deepe
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“It will be horrific—”A throa
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seventeen databases and built machi
Page 365 and 366:
When given a choice between A (tell
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else to do it?’ I think my cookie
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You can fall in love: someone will
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faint yellow lights. “And I’d b
Page 373 and 374:
“No,” she repeated, pensive.
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“I think that somewhere along the
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He rolled his eyes. “What’s you
Page 380 and 381:
Author’s NoteI write stories set
Page 382 and 383:
AcknowledgmentsFirst, just allow me
Page 384 and 385:
Don’t missLove on the Braincoming
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shrooms they just purchased from a
Page 394 and 395:
“I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, bu
Page 396 and 397:
more . . . connected than I origina
Page 398 and 399:
unresponsive to my brain’s comman
Page 400:
Photo courtesy of the authorAli Haz
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The Love Hypothesis by Ali Hazelwood

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