I Fell in Love with Hope - Lancali

“So are you,” I tease back.
We dance and banter for a few songs. Needless chattering and
clinking glasses don’t distract us. Even if Sam and I are rarely apart,
we are rarely alone too. We take advantage of the time and the dark.
“Sweet Sam,” he whispers.
“Yes?”
His touch runs up my spine, his eyes soft and melting. “Let’s run
away together like we talked about,” he says. “Just you and I.”
My body tenses.
“All those kids out there, I don’t envy them,” Sam keeps talking, his
voice in my ear, his mask rubbing against my temple. “I don’t need
anything ordinary.
Henry ran away with his friend to join the army when he was only a
little older than us. I don’t need anyone but you. So let’s just run
away. We can dance every single night, we can raise the little plants
you like and share a bed and see the world. Let’s run away, my love.
Like this, but forever.”
“What about our castle?” I whisper. My limbs feel stuck in a loop with
the music. But I’m no longer there. I’m spreading through the ground,
the hospital’s body, it’s bricks, it’s concrete, it’s souls pulling me
back. “We have to protect our patients, remember?”
Sam doesn’t respond. His breath gains another kind of quality. A
quieter sort of disappointment that sags against my shoulder.
I bury my face in his neck. I breathe in his scent, the comforting
notes of our home embedded in his skin. We sneak out, we trail the
outskirts, but we’ve never strayed forever. Sam can’t stray forever.
Even with barriers, his mask, his gloves, he can’t survive without his
medicine.