I Fell in Love with Hope - Lancali

He was heading to first period, hair still wet from his morning
practice. He looked at Neo, at the boys who’d stilled their
aggressions to make it seem like nothing was out of the ordinary. A
pack of wolves caging a bloodied lamb, waiting for the shepherd to
walk away before mauling the rest of it.
“I didn’t even feel those bruises, Sam,” Neo says. “I didn’t care that
they punched me or broke my wrist or said they’d tell my parents
how disgusting I
was or any of it.”
He struggles for his next breath.
“No one ever liked me. No one ever thought anything of me. So, the
whole time, all I saw was the back of Coeur’s head when he left me
there. I thought he was the one I could sail with. I thought that maybe
instead of rowing to the end of the sea, I could row to heaven.
Because even if it was just one person, I finally had someone.” Neo’s
breath hitches. “I thought I finally had someone.”
Neo doesn’t cry. His jaw aches with how hard he represses it. I kiss
him and hug him. He hugs me back till the medicine lulls him to
sleep.
I understand why it hurts.
I understand the loneliness of not being seen.
I understand, most of all, from years of watching, that ignorance is
worse than cruelty.
—
In time, C finally steals without fear. It’s not very skillful. Like I said,
he’s too big, too noticeable. He steals an apple and a book from the
library and more determined than ever, he goes to Neo’s room.