I Fell in Love with Hope - Lancali

Neo doesn’t move. He simply looks up at her, his hands on her
knees.
Blue and red touch Sony’s face, the ambulance that brought her
here tonight still fresh in her mind. She tries to laugh, a dry sound,
the kind I never want to hear. It’s an insult to her true laughter.
“She wasn’t sick,” she says, like the greatest tragedy of her life is a
sick joke of its own. “She just died in her sleep.”
Sony is a gladiator. She was born to conquer mountains and race
the gods.
She even raced death and won, crossing the finish line, her body
broken, but her soul still childish and alive. Shame cowers in fear of
her and defeat never knew her name till now.
I think of Sony’s mother that day, sleeping in her daughter’s room.
She wasn’t sick, never was, but she never looked twice at Neo and
me either. She never let discomfort through her hands as she
brought us gifts and treats. She always asked about our days rather
than our health. Her warmth, like her daughter’s, knew no bounds.
Sony’s mother was one of those people who would give anything just
to see her child happy. Not in her expectations, not in a vicarious
future, but wearing her own joy, climbing her own mountains. It’s a
rarer thing to find in parents than you may think. Having to lose her
and not knowing why brings Sony to the edge.
Reasons are illusions. Their absence is common. If only it weren’t
their presence that keeps people sane.
Sony starts to cry, holding her chest as if her lung could fall from her
ribs.
Neo takes her by the shoulders. He holds her upright.
“Is someone coming for you?” he asks.