DEC 2022. Blues Vol 38 No. 12

FROM THE GUEST EDITOR’S DESK
Notifying Next of Kin
The hardest part of our job!!
The Holidays are here! Thanksgiving.
Christmas. New Years. And,
while most of the time that translates
into a lot of fun times, happy
memories being made and a lot
of good food being eaten, there’s
another thing, too….
As any Peace Officer will tell
you, Notifications are one of the
hardest parts of this job. Anytime
of the day, night, month or the
year, its never easy. But at Holiday
time…. whew. It’ll hurt your heart,
folks. I’m here to tell ya.
Today, I responded to a scene
with a few of my Officers and
a Patrol Supervisor, not to be
“Chief” on the scene or whatever,
but to simply be supportive.
Without going into a lot of detail,
the deceased was a medically
retired employee of the Department.
Thus, I felt it important to
be there.
Fast forward, the Officers were
busy at the scene and the nearest
relative lived a short distance
away. Again, not there to be the
“Chief” but to sincerely be supportive,
I told them, I got the
Notification. No worries. To which,
come to think of it, I got no argument
on.
Anyway, as I was walking up
the sidewalk to the Next of Kin’s
residence, a very small framed,
elderly female opened the door
and immediately recognized me
as the Chief of Police and tears
welled up in her eyes, before I
ever uttered a word. As respectfully,
humbly and sincerely as possible
I made the notification. After
a few moments, she said, “When
I saw the Chief of Police walking
up, I didn’t know what it could be.
But, I knew it couldn’t be good.”
Two things here friend….Being a
Chief, Constable, Sheriff, Director
etc. carries a lot of weight. A LOT.
We don’t even have to speak and
our mere presence causes an effect.
Secondly, Death Notifications
are a very serious part of the job.
There are not always the same,
either. Some go ok, low key even.
And others, well, not so much.
I’d have to say, during this time
of year, a Death Notification carries
with it, something which is almost
downright tangible. It’ll weigh
on as you speak to people by a
Christmas Tree, Wreath, Menorah
or other Holiday Decorations. You
know the news you’re bringing to
the door isn’t good. Not at all. And
you know whatever you’re going
to say, every single word of it, the
other person will never forget.
Believe me, when you’re called
upon for this specific task, look
sharp. Wipe the dust and crap off
your boots. Tuck in your shirt, and
look the part. Speak with care,
concern, empathy and respect.
Tell it for what it is. Don’t jack
around the subject. That’s disrespectful
for all involved and does
you, the Officer, no good what so
ever. Remember how you look,
speak and act during the moments
of a Death Notification with
CHIEF REX EVANS
resonate with that person, the
family and friends, forevermore.
I would say I can remember each
one I have made. But over so many
years, I just can’t. I can remember
every Officer involved Notification
and every child death notification.
Those are seared into my mind
and into my heart, for the rest of
my days. There have been some
nights, deep in the night, I am
jolted awake by the screams from
those very Notifications.
To sum it up, the Holidays are
usually a great time of joy for
many. But please be mindful of
the fact that if you’re called upon
to provide a Death Notification,
especially over the Holidays, there
comes a certain amount of weight
with that moment. For the family.
For the friends. And, for you.
Always remember, look out for
your brother and sister Law Enforcement
Officers. Please. No
one else is. And we of all people,
should always strive to remember,
we are in fact our Brothers and
Sisters Keeper.
God bless and thank you all for
supporting this Institution we call
“The Blues”. Be careful out there!!!
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