DEC 2022. Blues Vol 38 No. 12

DR. TINA JAECKLE
blue mental health
Give Yourself the Gift of Hope
This Holiday Season.
Many of our nation’s law enforcement
officers have had a
challenging year in countless
ways. The 2022 statistics for
line of duty deaths (especially
by gunfire) and suicides in this
field are staggering and can be
overwhelming. The holidays are
also often a difficult time for LEO
families due to work schedules,
family conflict, financial constraints,
and at times, a sense of
helplessness due to depression
and lack of hope. We also live in
a world in which comparison of
our lives to others is commonplace
and frequently perpetuated
by social media and high
expectations for the “perfect”
holiday experience. It can place
a great deal of unnecessary
pressure on an LE family during
an already stressful time of the
year.
Instead of this month’s article
focusing solely on the negative, I
want to instead offer the gift of
hope through some basic approaches
that are designed to
reduce psychological stressors
and increase hope for the holiday
season. Amy Morgan, (Police1,
2019), offered the following
excellent suggestions and I encourage
to practice these often.
1. STOP COMPARING. If you
find yourself comparing your
holiday with others, stop and
focus on what matters to you,
and then let that be enough. Be
content with where you are,
who you are and what you have.
If you are financially stressed,
don’t worsen the situation by
giving gifts to try to match the
actions of others. Instead, give of
yourself and work with what you
have, but don’t deplete yourself
in the process or let comparisons
make you feel unworthy.
2. SET REALISTIC EXPECTA-
TIONS. All the hype around the
holidays makes us feel like we
should ramp up our energy, our
home décor, our financial ability,
our time with friends and family,
and even our level of happiness.
Instead set your expectations
in line with the reality of your
own little piece of the world. If
you aren’t a cook, don’t expect
to present your family with a
golden holiday turkey and all the
fixings. Set realistic expectations
about how your own holiday
will, and should, look, for your
own life.
3. LET GO OF REGRET. Maybe
this wasn’t your best year.
If there’s something in your life
you wish was different, and you
still have the ability to change it,
start working on doing that. But
if you can’t change something,
try letting go of the feeling of
regret that’s eating away at you.
DR. TINA JAECKLE
If you need to apologize to someone,
do it, genuinely and sincerely.
If you need to forgive someone,
do it, for your own sense of
peace. And then move on. Let go
of the regrets so you can start
the New Year free of stress and
anxiety.
4. ACCEPT YOUR STRUGGLES.
Life is hard sometimes, and nobody
is getting through it as easily
as they may make it seem. Things
may be hard for you for many
reasons – it is okay to admit that
things aren’t great. Accept that all
of us struggle at different points
in life with different things. Don’t
let the season make you focus on
the struggles – remember that
this season and its challenges will
pass.
5. SET NEW YEAR GOALS.
Instead of pressure-filled resolutions,
set some goals. But
don’t set your expectations so
high you’ll never be able to follow
through. Name a few simple
things you’d like to be different
in your life – and then outline a
plan to achieve that change. This
year practice healthy approaches
and do what you need to do. If
you’re feeling down, depressed,
or alone, please reach out to
any number of law enforcement
mental health resources and
you’ll find a caring voice at the
other end of the line to help you
make it through the hard stuff.
The holiday season, just like your
life, is what you make it. Celebrate
the holiday for the reasons
you choose, in the way that fits
you and your life, and make the
very best of it that you can with
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whatever you have to work with.
6. TAKE THE TIME TO EXER-
CISE. You do not have to jump
right into crossfit if you have
not exercised regularly but get
out for at least a brisk walk and
break a sweat. You will feel and
think better. You can also do this
a couple of times a week, and
invite your spouse, partner, and/
or children to walk with you to
enjoy family time.
7. GIVE BACK TO OTHERS. A
local FOP hosts an “adopt a LE
retiree or survivor” each holiday
and encourages others to take
them to lunch or provide a gift
card or simply give the gift of
“presence”. There are numerous
charities and opportunities
available this time of year, including
for children. Giving to
others allows a mental shift of
perspective away from our own
struggles toward better understanding
and connecting with
others. Remember, we rise by
lifting others. Most importantly,
practice hope, even a little very
day. Happy holidays and Merry
Christmas to you all, blessings
always.
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