Sheffield United vs Burnley

UTB 37
▲ The much-missed Derek Newbould took
bookings for the old gym at Bramall Lane
Former director and voice of reason,
Bernard Proctor, had identified from
board meetings that we had, shall we
say, something of a surplus of these in
stock to say the least. He came up with
the idea, and I swear that this is true,
of sending me up on the South Stand
concourse to, and I quote: “Sell them out
of large suitcases like that Del Boy on
Only Fools and Horses.”
I fell about laughing until the penny
dropped that Mr. Proctor was deadly
serious. He did, indeed, view me as
having the public persona of a fly pitch
trader with bants to match and thought it
would be a lighthearted way of knocking
some surplus out cheap to get some
dough back in the coffers.
Now Sheffield being Sheffield, we all
know that had this been allowed to pass,
I would still be being reminded about it
now on a fairly regular basis and in no
uncertain terms, so there was no way
it could happen. It wasn’t until Derek
Dooley pointed out to his old friend that
there was a high chance that JG would
get lynched by the poor sods who had
paid full whack for the version in gold and
purple only a short time before.
Anyway, it was decided that they
should be stored in the sports hall until
such a time that it was viewed they were
safe to be seen in public again. After
a few weeks, everywhere you went in
S2 you saw adults and children alike
adorned in the creative Patrick garment,
and no-one could work out why until
one day one someone from accounts
went up to the hall to try and track down
some paperwork only to find most of the
kids from the local area in there helping
themselves to the kit. They were even
apparently delivering to size order like
an early version of Amazon. They were
gaining access via a whopping great
hole that had appeared in the roof and
by lowering themselves into the building
itself. You had to give them credit; it
was an ingenious system. They were
apparently going in when they had orders
come day or night! The same shirts have
now, incidentally, gained a cult following
and fetch a fair few quid when they come
up for sale.
The lead up to kits coming out always
fascinates, along with the debate and
opinions that you get all over social
media. People get to know what you do
for a living and, of course, where you
work. The knowledge that you work for
a club means that, from that moment
on, there is seldom anything like a quiet
drink or afternoon out with the missus.
Because you work for the club you are
generally deemed to do anything and
everything and also know all that goes
SHEFFIELD UNITED vs BURNLEY