Issue 4 | 2022

REAL PEOPLE | REAL STORIES | REAL HOPE
HOW TO WALK THROUGH
THE VALLEY
DAR VUELTA
PARA VER
EN ESPAÑOL
TRUST THE PROCESS OF
GOD’S PLAN
Darryl
Strawberry
DRAFTED
TO GOD’S TEAM
A magazine
on a mission:
see page 2
Issue 04 / 2022

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PHOTO BY EDOVO

ISSUE 4, OCTOBER 2022
“You didn’t choose me. I chose you. I appointed you
to go and produce lasting fruit.” John 15:16 NLT
Publisher & Executive Director
Kristi Overton Johnson
Accounting Manager
Carla Owens
Cover Photography
Wenn Rights Ltd. / Alamy Stock
Editor
Rachel Overton
Spanish Editorial Team
Karissa Anderson, Proofreader
Monica Colangelo, Translator
Creative Designer
Lauren Jones
Creative Content Team
Kory K. Gordon
Kristi Overton Johnson
Christina Kimbrel
Production Manager
Christina Kimbrel
Digital Content Manager
Sheridan Correa
Roman Randall
Director of Prison Correspondence
Carla Owens
Director of Partner Care & Development
Pat Avery
Hispanic Outreach Director
Denise San Miguel
Story Contributors
Roy A. Borges
Joshua Brown
Thaddeus Bruce
Kristi Dews Dale
Julie Engstrom
Kristi Overton Johnson
Christina Kimbrel
Darryl Strawberry
Tracy Strawberry
Thomas Thibault
Photography
AB Forces News Collection / Alamy Stock
Daniel Aguilar with Daz Photos
Mike Barber Ministries
John Barrett
Luke Downer/Jesus Church
EDOVO
Florida DOC
Joey Meddock Photography
PCN Photography
Reuters /Ed Betz
Reuters /Joe Skipper
The Strawberry Family
Gerald Tookes
Wenn Rights Ltd. / Alamy Stock
Artwork
Jared Emerson
Victorious Living Magazine is a quarterly publication of Kristi Overton Johnson Ministries,
a 501c3 organization. Copyright © 2022, Kristi Overton Johnson Ministries, all rights
reserved. For permission to reprint or copy any material contained in these pages or online,
please contact us at admin@vlmag.org.
DISCLAIMER: The articles featured in Victorious Living are designed to inspire and encourage
our readers by sharing powerful testimonies from people who, we believe, have been transformed
by God’s grace, love, and power. The articles are focused on each individual’s testimony.
Although we conduct some independent research, we rely heavily on the information provided
to us by those we interview. Our articles are not intended to be an endorsement of the views,
opinions, choices, or activities of the persons whose stories we feature. The statements, views,
and opinions of those persons whose stories we feature are purely their own, and we do not
control and are not responsible for any such statements, views, or opinions.
HOW TO REACH VICTORIOUS LIVING
General, Subscription, and Partnership Inquiries
• Victorious Living
PO Box 2801, Greenville, NC 27836
• 352-478-2098
• admin@vlmag.org
All Prison Inmate Correspondence
• Victorious Living Correspondence Outreach
PO Box 2751, Greenville, NC 27836
• hope@vlmag.org
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Scripture marked NIV is taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV®, copyright
©1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc. | Scripture marked NLT is taken from the Holy Bible,
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marked NKJV is taken from the New King James Version of the Bible, ®. Copyright © 1982 by
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el mundo.
VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM
Issue 04 / 2022
3

THE VICTORIOUS LIVING STORY
One visit with an incarcerated friend in 2013 opened the eyes
of Victorious Living founder, Kristi Overton Johnson, to the
hopelessness of life behind bars. It also birthed in her a desire to
deliver hope to the souls of incarcerated men and women.
Soon after, God opened doors for Victorious Living magazine to
be distributed in the prison system. He then led Kristi and the VL
team onto prison yards to share His message of hope in person and,
more recently, digitally through prison tablets.
Before that prison encounter, Kristi had
spent 35 years water-skiing competitively
worldwide, never considering those
who had lost their freedom. But God
had a plan for this world champion
water-skier to go behind bars to
encourage hearts with God’s love
and His message of redemption
and to equip people to get up and
experience victorious living for
themselves.
Since 2013, Victorious Living
magazine has impacted the lives of
over one million incarcerated souls...
and the story is still being written.
BE A PART OF THE
VL STORY
Victorious Living is a great
way to carry out God’s
command to remember the
prisoner (Matthew 25:34–40;
Hebrews 13:3). Here’s how
you can help us deliver hope
to the incarcerated.
SHARE
Share VL with your local church,
chaplain, jail, or prison. VL is a
great mission to support and a
good tool to use too!
SUPPORT
VL is partner supported. Your taxdeductible
gift sends copies of
VLMag into jails and prisons, where
it saves lives. And when you give,
we’ll send you a copy too.
SPONSOR
Sponsor jails and prisons to receive
quarterly cases of VL. It costs us
$500 to supply 1 case of VL to 1
facility, each quarter, for 1 year.
SOCIAL MEDIA
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platforms. Like. Follow. Share.
@victoriouslivingmag
PHOTO BY MIKE BARBER MINISTRIES PHOTO BY JOEY MEDDOCK PHOTOGRAPHY
VISIT VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM OR CALL 352-478-2098

ISSUE 4, OCTOBER 2022
CONTENTS
8
9
13
17
STEPPING FORWARD
Follow His Voice
BY JULIE ENGSTROM
Prayer: Never a Dropped Call
BY ROY A. BORGES
Leave the Missing Pieces
to God
BY CHRISTINA KIMBREL
God’s Mercy Set This People
Pleaser Free
BY KRISTI DEWS DALE
31
10
TRANSFORMED
LIVES
Look in the Mirror
BY DARRYL STRAWBERRY
Darryl and Tracy Strawberry’s marriage
left a lot to be desired—but now, with
God’s help, they have a healthy and
prosperous marriage and are helping
others find the same.
FEATURES
That’s Not My Name
Anymore
14
18
A Prisoner of Hope
THE STORY OF THOMAS THIBAULT
Despite serving four life sentences without
parole, Thomas considers himself a blessed
man, and his heart is full of hope.
COVER STORY
Drafted to God’s Team
THE STORY OF
DARRYL STRAWBERRY
MLB Hall of Famer Darryl Strawberry’s
life should have been everything
anyone could have dreamed of…but
it wasn’t. Addicted to drugs, alcohol,
sex, and other poor choices, he was
a captive in a prison of his own making.
Only God could set him free.
PHOTO COURTESY OF THE STRAWBERRY FAMILY
26
How to Walk through
the Valley
BY KRISTI OVERTON JOHNSON
THE STORY OF THADDEUS BRUCE
Thaddeus spent his life searching for
meaning and acceptance, but those
things aren’t found in this world. They’re
found in surrender to the never-ending,
relentless love of God.
ON THE COVER
Darryl and Tracy
Strawberry are living
proof of God’s love and
His power to restore
even the most broken
of lives. With God’s
help, this couple rebuilt
their lives and marriage
on the solid foundation
of God’s Word and are
now helping others do
the same.
22
28
Trust the Process of
God’s Plan
THE STORY OF
TRACY STRAWBERRY
Tracy knew most of her problems
were the result of choices she’d
made, so why even bother considering
God? There’s no way He’d want
her anyway. But God pursued her
and, in His time and through His
perfect plan, He made her whole.
It’s Going to Be Okay
THE STORY OF JOSHUA BROWN
“It’s going to be okay. You’re going
to make it.” Sentenced to 10 years in
prison, Joshua couldn’t see how those
words could possibly be true. What
he didn’t know yet was that with
God, even thriving through incarceration
is possible.
IN EVERY ISSUE
6
Publisher’s Note
You Are God’s Masterpiece
33
Want to Know Jesus?
I’m Saved...Now What?
34
Ministry News/Resources
VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM
Issue 04 / 2022
5

PUBLISHER’S NOTE
You Are God’s Masterpiece
Top: Publisher, Kristi Overton Johnson (L)
with Tracy and Darryl Strawberry after their
interviews for Victorious Living. We are
grateful to this amazing couple for sharing
their hearts and wisdom with our readers.
Bottom: Kristi’s daughter’s gift of art is the
subject of this Publisher’s Note. God used
this beautiful piece to teach Kristi a valuable
lesson.
If you’d like to partner with
our magazine to deliver God’s
hope and to impact the lives of
incarcerated men and women,
visit victoriouslivingmagazine
.com. Your gift enables us to
send this magazine into prisons
around the nation. Each
magazine impacts many lives
for years to come.
Have you ever felt like you’re not
good enough or you have too
many flaws or you’ve made too
many mistakes for God to love you, much
less use you? Well, be encouraged. This
magazine specializes in sharing stories
of flawed people that God chose to love
and use.
Take, for example, Darryl and Tracy
Strawberry, featured in this issue’s cover
stories. Darryl, a 4-time MLB World
Series champion, was millions of dollars
in debt and hopelessly addicted to drugs.
Tracy’s life was in shambles, too. Unhealed
wounds from her childhood traumas had
led her down her own road of despair.
But then they met Jesus, and His love
and grace transformed their broken life
stories into beautiful masterpieces. Today,
God is using them to lead others to
freedom and healing in Him.
Making masterpieces out of messes is
God’s specialty, and He loves to put those
rebuilt lives on display for His glory. God
reminded me of that recently, while I was
looking at a Christmas gift my daughter
had given me.
Ivy, a graphic design major, had lovingly
designed a poster for me. It was a beautiful
picture of an angel with lyrics from
my favorite worship song. I was initially
blown away by the beauty of her present…
but then it happened.
My eyes zeroed in on a misspelled
word, and suddenly, all I could see was
the mistake. (It’s the curse of an editor!) I
completely lost sight of the beauty of her
creation.
For months, I begged Ivy to fix the error
so I could hang the design in my office.
I wanted to display it—I really did. But
I wanted it to be perfect first. (I mean,
wouldn’t she be embarrassed if people
saw that she’d misspelled a word?)
Ivy, however, hasn’t shared my concern.
It’s been almost a year, and she still hasn’t
corrected that word. That’s why the picture
has remained hidden over in the corner
of my office.
Until last week, when it caught my eye,
and I began to feel guilty for not appreciating
her gift. It was time to display the
picture, mistake or no mistake. I looked
around for a good place to hang it and
thought of my closet—I spend a lot of time
in there praying and working. That would
be perfect, I decided.
But as I searched for a spot, I felt an
inner nudge to take a deeper look at the
design. I sat down and looked past the misspelled
word to the picture.
I became captivated by the stars and
the intricate details of the angel. Brilliant
colors swirled in the background, and I
realized Ivy had chosen my favorite shades.
I had missed all these details!
And then, as He often does, God used
this everyday object to teach me about His
desire to display us despite our flaws.
I took out my journal and wrote. “Oh,
Lord, thank You for not hiding me from
the world until I’m mistake-free. You aren’t
embarrassed by me. Instead, You put me
on display, mistakes and all, as a testament
to the world of Your grace and love. You
accept me, use me, and love me, exactly
the way I am, right now. How incredible!
Not only that, You invite my imperfect self
into an intimate relationship—now! Thank
You, Lord, for not being like me.”
Have you ever considered that God loves
and wants to display you too, broken pieces
and all? It’s true—see Ephesians 2:10.
Friend, God isn’t looking for perfect,
sinless people. He’d never find them! He
simply wants each of us to surrender our
broken pieces to His skilled hands.
When we do, He turns our messy lives
into masterpieces.
Kristi Overton Johnson
Publisher & Executive Director
6 Issue 04 / 2022 VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM

Through the stories of Victorious Living,
men and women behind bars
meet the God of another chance.
PHOTO BY DANIEL AGUILAR WITH DAZ PHOTOS
Testimony of Victorious Living
Impact: Joshua Brown
VL provided hope when I had none.
I discovered Victorious Living when I was
locked up. I was in the middle of my own
redemption story. There were moments
behind bars when I thought my life was as
good as it was ever going to get. But then, I’d
read a featured story in VL and hear about
someone else’s victorious journey, and I’d
think, “That can be my story of victory, too.”
Each story provided living proof of a
modern-day biblical redemption. And it gave
me hope. Knowing Jesus is still in control
and able and willing to transform lives filled
me with holy excitement.
I lived expectantly as I waited for God to
work in my life. And He did! Today I am a
pastor, husband, and soon-to-be father. I
thank God for redeeming my life.
As a pastor, I love that Victorious Living
doesn’t push a denomination or an agenda.
VL’s only agenda is showing off Christ. They
want people to know the goodness of God
and His life-changing power. That is the
hallmark of a true ambassador of God.
Thank you, Victorious Living, for being
there for the incarcerated and helping us see
past our circumstances to God’s possibilities
for our lives.
SPONSOR A PRISON
IN YOUR STATE AND
IMPACT LIVES TODAY.
Visit victoriouslivingmagazine.com.
VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM
Issue 04 / 2022
7

STEPPING FORWARD
FOLLOW
HIS VOICE
BY JULIE ENGSTROM
FOR YEARS, A LONG WALK AROUND
my neighborhood had been part of my daily
schedule. It’s one of my favorite ways to
spend time in prayer and to connect with
God. One morning, planning to take my
regular route, I prepared my usual supplies:
water, a towel, and sun protection.
I was doing the same thing I did every
morning, but this day was about to become
anything but routine.
As I headed out my front door, something
told me to take a different route. I
hesitated at the idea of a new adventure,
but I couldn’t resist the prompting. So I
decided to take the same path I always did,
just in reverse. The trail I use makes a big
circle around my neighborhood. I knew it
well, I thought. But walking this new way
showed me things I’d never seen before.
At first, I lost my sense of direction. I
knew I was on the right path, but everything
looked so different that, for a minute
or two, I was disoriented. Once I got my
bearings, I noticed stuff I’d never paid attention
to before. Walking in the opposite
direction brought me a fresh perspective
on so many things.
I realized I had missed a lot of vital signs
during my routine walk because I always
saw them from behind. “Do not enter when
flooded.” “Speed bump ahead.” “Caution.”
“Uneven sidewalks.” “Beware of snakes.”
I was astounded. For years, I had missed
vital information that I should have been
aware of for my safety.
As I built up my momentum, the path
seemed more manageable. I didn’t struggle
going uphill on the sidewalks, and the
sun was against my back, so I wasn’t getting
flushed or pouring sweat. Familiar
landmarks appeared, and I realized that,
despite the fear and doubt I’d had at the beginning of this
walk, the path I was on still led me home.
Walking in the opposite direction and changing my
point of view made me more alert. I paid more attention
to the signs and looked behind me to acclimate myself
to where I had been.
As I returned home that day, the Lord reminded me
of how, in His Word, He uses the symbolism of a walk to
describe the way we grow in our relationship with Jesus.
We might start out by sticking to what we know, afraid
to let go of what’s comfortable even though it’s bad for
us. We’ll likely continue moving in our own direction,
but we’re deceived if we think we know better than God
what’s best for us.
When Jesus comes into your heart and life, He beckons
you to walk in a new direction. At first, it might seem
scary, unpredictable, or challenging. You might feel completely
confused, like I did that morning when I changed
course. Don’t be discouraged. It doesn’t mean you’re on
the wrong path. God promises to go ahead of you and
fight for you (Deuteronomy 1:30). He’ll protect you from
behind (Isaiah 52:12). If God asks you to move to the right
or to the left on the narrow path, you can do it knowing He
will never leave you or forsake you (Deuteronomy 31:6).
Listen for His voice. Take one step at a time toward
the good plan and purpose He has for your life (Jeremiah
29:11). Your faith and confidence will grow as you
discover that our Lord is good and He wants only what
is best for you.
Are you ready to walk in the direction of the eternal
life His work on the cross has secured for you? Jesus
is waiting to offer you grace and mercy, and He wants
nothing more than to guide you home to a place of safety
in His arms where you can rest.
WHETHER YOU
TURN TO THE
RIGHT OR TO
THE LEFT, YOUR
EARS WILL
HEAR A VOICE
BEHIND YOU,
SAYING, “THIS
IS THE WAY;
WALK IN IT.”
ISAIAH 30:21 NIV
JULIE ENGSTROM is a wife
and mother who uses her gifts
of teaching and encouragement
to help other women find and
embrace their identity in Christ.
8 Issue 04 / 2022 VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM

STEPPING FORWARD
Prayer: Never a Dropped Call
BY ROY A. BORGES
TECHNOLOGY HAS BEEN A STRUGGLE
for me since I got out of prison. When I
was locked up in 1989, computers and cell
phones weren’t a thing. It was quite a shock
to my system to walk out into a world where
payphones are an extinct species.
During one of my first outings as a free
man, I encountered the cell-phone phenomenon.
Every person I met seemed to
be tethered to one. As I stood in line to get
my ID, I noticed how people weren’t talking
to each other or paying attention to those
around them. Instead, almost every person
had their face buried in their phone.
I learned that people don’t connect and
relate to each other the way they did back
in the old days. It was a little discouraging.
“Roy, you’re going to need a cell phone,”
a helpful friend insisted. “It’s how everyone
communicates these days. Let’s go
get you one.” He was right, but I was not
interested or excited. It was unfamiliar and
uncomfortable.
I’m still not sure what to think of the gadget.
Little glitches can be annoying, like
when I’m trying to text someone and autocorrect
“helps” me. It will suggest a word
that sounds like the one I’m trying to use,
but it’s not always the right one. Pressing
Send before making sure my message is
clear can prove disastrous. Dropped calls
are also a nuisance. There have been times
when I was in the middle of a conversation
and suddenly the line went dead.
The learning curve with all this new
technology has made me grateful to have
a direct line of communication with the
Crea tor of the universe. Prayer is mentioned
a multitude of times throughout the
Bible. Why do you think God talks about
it so much? Because He wants us to know
how important it is that we have an intimate
relationship with Him.
When Jesus walked the earth, prayer
was an essential part of His life. It was His
way of staying connected to His Father. I’m
sure it helped him focus on His purpose
for being here too. And then He taught His
disciples to make it a priority in their lives.
Before becoming a Christian, I didn’t
think about talking to God. He was the last
thing on my mind. But harsh circumstances
during my 31-year stay in the Florida
Department of Corrections taught me that
prayer is perhaps the most critical discipline
in a believer’s walk with the Lord. I
needed prayer the same way Jesus did. Life
was dark and lonely behind those walls, but
when I prayed, I felt closer to God.
My prayer time became as important as
eating, sleeping, walking, and talking. God
was never too busy or distracted to spend
time with me during all those years, and He
is still my closest companion today.
Are you in a dark place and need a reliable
friend? Let me encourage you to reach
out to God through prayer. Communication
through prayer isn’t like cell-phone
technology—you will never run out of data,
have a failed connection, or experience a
dropped call. You will never be an inconvenience
to Him either.
God promises to answer when you seek
Him (Psalm 34:4–5). You can take all your
troubles to Him (Psalm 55:22). He never
gets tired of you, and He is always listening
(Psalm 116:2–4).
Friend, God knows you better than anyone
else does. He cares about every detail
of your life, and He will meet you in your
prayer time. He loves you, and He wants
to hear from you.
Call on Him today (Jeremiah 33:3).
ROY A. BORGES served 31 years in the Florida
Department of Corrections, where he realized
his need for a Savior. While incarcerated, Roy
ministered to others through his writings, over
300 of which have been published. He now lives in
Tampa, Florida, and is a member of the Victorious
Living writing team.
VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM
Issue 04 / 2022
9

THE STORY OF THADDEUS BRUCE
he feeling of not measuring up started me on
the long, hard road I have traveled.
As a pastor’s kid, I grew up in awe of my father.
He was well respected in the community and had
achieved remarkable things in ministry, but his
approval eluded me. In fact, he had no interest in me at
all and chose to be absent most of the time.
That rejection caused deep feelings of insecurity
and insignificance. I didn’t fit anywhere, not even in
my home. Thinking my dad would love me and want a
relationship with me if I could achieve a certain status,
I worked hard in school and excelled in many things.
I especially pushed myself in sports. I became a star
basketball player and received many accolades, but my
father never noticed. Our relationship never grew, and
each rejection deepened the wound in my young heart.
I began looking for acceptance elsewhere. I started
drinking and drugging with friends, never considering
how harmful the choices were that I was making. They
would eventually prove to be my undoing.
My basketball career took off despite my partying. I
played college ball at Florida A & M University and had
my sights set on the NBA. I didn’t make the cut, but I
did play professionally for Mexico for three seasons.
Life was good. I had a beautiful wife and a lovely family.
Everyone around me loved and accepted me, and I
felt secure. But then an injury sidelined me, and my
professional basketball career came crashing to an end.
Desperate to find a new identity and a place to belong,
I joined the US Army. Being a part of something bigger
than me felt good, and I rediscovered what I thought was
security and worth. In 1985, I led the All Army basketball
team to the Post Championship. I was a star again.
PHOTO BY GERALD TOOKES
10 Issue 04 / 2022 VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM

But behind the scenes, I was drinking
heavily and smoking crack. I fooled myself
into thinking I could function as an
addict, but I wasn’t deceiving my family or
the army officers. I was on a train running
downhill at full speed with no brakes.
After many failed drug tests, the army
slapped me with Article 15s for misconduct
and eventually dismissed me. I was 29
and humiliated but unwilling to change. I
continued down the same destructive path
until I lost everything—my marriage, children,
home, and conscience.
I ran to the streets and pawned everything
I owned. I hustled and ran game. I
even stole money from family and friends
so I could keep smoking crack. Days would
go by before I’d even think about bathing,
changing clothes, or eating. All I cared
about was my next hit.
My addiction led me through 21 treatment
centers and kept me in chains for 23
years. And all that time, I imagined God
must be very disappointed in me. My sin
and regret blinded me to the truth of God’s
love, and I believed all kinds of lies from
the enemy.
Satan told me daily that I was a failure, a
mistake, unwanted, and no good. He convinced
me I would never be free from the
bondage of addiction. He told me that God
could never love me.
I begged God to deliver me hundreds
of times, just like blind Bartimaeus, who
lay by the side of the road crying out to
Jesus (Mark 10:46–52). My cries emerged
from the crack houses, “Take this addiction
away, God, please, or take me away.”
I didn’t know He was listening, but He
was. God’s eye had never left me. Unlike my
earthly father and despite all I had done,
God wanted a relationship with me.
Thanks to the fervent prayers from
my mother and aunt and their close
prayer-warrior friends, I would soon come
to understand my identity as a child of God.
Their powerful, relentless prayers changed
my life (James 5:16).
Those women gave Satan a run for his
money, especially after they recruited Pastor
Kimberly Daniels from Jacksonville,
Florida. As a former addict, this mighty
servant of God knew how to pursue me
with God’s love. I could see His power at
work in her life, and I started to think, “If
God could set her free, He might do the
same for me.”
But crack still had a tight grip on me,
and it continued to pull me down. I’d go
from church to the dope house and back
again. But Pastor Kim always came looking
for me.
She’d stand outside the crack house,
yelling into a bullhorn, “Thaddeus, we
know you’re in there. Come out now!” She
disturbed the other crackheads so much
that they told me to leave. “Dude, get outta
here. That crazy lady with the bullhorn is
gonna bring the police in here!” She made
quite the scene.
I’ll never forget the day I was coming
off a binge and those ladies were praying
the whole way there. God used that precious
little girl to help me wake up to His
relentless love for me.
Still, I was arrested and sent to jail on
a paraphernalia charge. I’d never been
locked up before, but there I was. In custody
for 30 days and with nothing but time
on my hands, I began taking a hard look at
my life. Regret and shame overwhelmed
me as I considered how selfishly I was living.
All I cared about was dope and myself.
I thought about my ex-wife and my children
and the devastation my addiction had
caused them. I had chosen drugs and abandoned
them to face life alone. Memories
of the crazy stories I had told my mother
haunted me. I had repeatedly taken advantage
of her to get money. I’d promised myself
every time that that was the last time
I’d do it, but there was always a next time.
Now, as I sat in my cell, face-to-face with
That’s the thing—God’s love is
truly unconditional.
and making a loud fuss about me going
to church. I stood my ground until Pastor
Kim’s four-year-old daughter, Faith,
walked into the room. She put her tiny
hand in mine and said, “Mr. Thaddeus, we
need you to go with us. I’m going to pray
for you, and then we’re leaving for church.”
My heart melted, and I broke down sobbing
as that little girl prayed for me.
The next thing I knew, I was in the car
and headed to church. Faith held my hand
Left: As a child,
Thaddeus never felt
like he measured up.
Right: He joined
the Army to find
acceptance. But his
childhood wounds
led to actions worthy
of discharge.
reality, I finally came to my senses. I was
ready to change. “God, if You’ll help me,”
I said, “I will quit drugs and do right with
my life.”
I promised my mom the same thing
when I pleaded with her to make my bail.
“Mama, please come get me,” I said. “I’m
ready to change. I’ll go back to church and
get right with God. Something is different
inside me.”
She had no reason to believe me, but she
VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM
Issue 04 / 2022
11

Forget the labels and
names that have been
spoken over you. If you’re
a believer in Jesus Christ,
you are loved, accepted,
secure, and worthy.
PHOTO BY GERALD TOOKES
came. God showed me a full measure of
mercy and forgiveness when He prompted
her to pay the bail to get me out of jail.
True to my word, I surrendered my life
to the Lord and faced my addiction with
Him. I did have a relapse and got high, but
it was for a short period of time. I haven’t
had a drop of alcohol or used drugs since
April 2004. To God be the glory.
It’s been 18 years since my surrender
to the Lord. I still don’t know why God
has chosen to use me for His kingdom’s
work, but He has. And He does. After all
the wrong I’ve done and the years I’ve wasted
living my life in opposition to Him, it
doesn’t make sense.
But that’s the thing—God’s love truly is
unconditional.
God has given me a new name and an
identity that no one can take away. Because
of Jesus, I’m no longer a lying, deceiving,
hopeless drug addict. I’m not an unwanted
son who doesn’t have a place in this world.
I am a child of God—loved, accepted, forgiven,
desired, redeemed, and able to conquer
anything, even crack cocaine addiction
(Philippians 4:13). The sacrificial blood
of Jesus Christ has washed me clean of all
my sins.
He has also given me a purpose in life.
Psalm 107:2 says, “Has the Lord redeemed
you? Then speak out! Tell others he has
redeemed you from your enemies” (NLT).
Man, do I have a story to tell.
One way God allows me to share His
redeeming love is through writing and
music. I’ve always loved music. As a boy,
I tagged along with my mom as she traveled
to different churches to sing in their
gospel choirs. Those are beautiful memories.
Somehow, despite all my trials and
tribulations, my love for music never died.
With God’s help, I began creating powerful
messages through poetry and song.
I began performing under the artist name,
Minister Redeemed. But God had to deal
with me about my resistance to rap music.
I didn’t care one bit for that genre, yet He
would not leave me alone. “How do you expect
to relate and minister to young people
if you aren’t willing to engage with them in
their taste in music,” He asked.
There was no point in wrestling with God
over the matter. He’d already rescued me
from the pit; why not let Him put a new
song in my heart, too (Psalm 40:1–3)? And
I relented.
“Lord,” I said, “if you want me to rap, I
will. But can I at least rap the scriptures?”
And just like that, the Lord changed my
perspective.
Powerful words poured out of me and
formed into new songs. I knew they were
from Him because they were effortless.
He often woke me up in the middle of the
night. I kept a notebook on my nightstand
to capture the words as they flowed.
Writing and performing God’s message
of redemption has been my passion ever
since. One of my favorite and most popular
songs has been “That’s Not My Name
Anymore.” Its message is simple: God loves
you and desires to give you a new name
and purpose.
God changed people’s names and gave
them new identities all through the Bible.
He did it for the trickster Jacob, who became
Israel. (See Genesis 32:22–32.) He
did it for the murderer, Saul, who became
the Apostle Paul. (See Acts 9:1–19, 13:9.)
He’ll do it for you if you let Him.
Forget the labels and names that have
been spoken over you. If you’re a believer
in Jesus Christ, you are not those things
anymore. You are a child of God, and in His
eyes, you are forgiven and washed clean
of all your sins by the sacrificial blood of
Jesus (1 John 1:9).
That’s who you are: Loved. Accepted.
Secure. And worthy.
THADDEUS BRUCE combines his powerful
testimony of redemption with his musical and writing
talent to help others find direction, transformation,
and a closer relationship with God. For more
information, visit www.thaddeusbruce.com.
12 Issue 04 / 2022 VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM

STEPPING FORWARD
Leave the Missing
Pieces to God
BY CHRISTINA KIMBREL
WHEN I WAS LITTLE, I WAS FASCINATED WITH solving
puzzles. My mom occasionally picked them up for me at
yard sales or thrift stores. I always welcomed the challenge of
opening a new jigsaw puzzle box, rolling up my sleeves, and
getting down to business.
I would pull out all the corners and edges and create the
border, then sort out the rest of the pieces by color and background.
I arranged them all in little piles around the table so
that as I worked, I could be as efficient and strategic as possible.
The top of the box was always propped up in front of me as
a guide. It didn’t matter whether it took hours or days; I would
study the pieces to determine their perfect fit. I didn’t stop until
my masterpiece was complete. My work was done when the
picture in front of me mirrored the one on the box.
It was a fun hobby, until the day I took things a little too
seriously. I had almost a whole puzzle put together before I
realized I had more empty spaces than the two or three pieces
that were left on the table. Frustration filled my heart as I
grabbed handfuls of puzzle pieces, threw them into the box,
and tossed the incomplete puzzle in the trash.
“Why don’t people tell you when pieces are missing?” I
lamented to my mom.
She answered me with a question I didn’t like at the time.
“Did you have fun?”
“Yes, but that’s not the point!”
“It’s exactly the point, Christina,” she replied. “If you knew
it wasn’t going to come out the way you wanted, you wouldn’t
have even tried. You would have missed the fun in the process.”
She was right, but I can’t say my young mind received
her wisdom that day.
A big struggle for me since my release from prison five years
ago has been starting new things without any guarantee that
they will work out. I’ve had new relationships, new jobs, and
new priorities…and some days, those things were scary.
The process of living this new way of life has been a lot like
putting together a jigsaw puzzle. On most days, I’ve meticulously
arranged the details and decisions ahead of me and
have a good strategy in mind for accomplishing my plans. But
sometimes things don’t turn out the way I envisioned.
Somehow there’s another missing puzzle piece to hinder
my progress. I might lack all the facts of a situation, or maybe
I expect things of others or myself that I shouldn’t.
Even at age 50, I can find myself annoyed with uncertainty
like I did as a child. I’m grateful for grace because I often
fail here. I’m also grateful for the reliable source of wisdom
I have that I can turn to when I’m grappling with a different
outcome than I expected.
Quitting is not an option anymore, so during those moments
of disappointment or frustration, Proverbs 19:21 helps
me look at things from a more mature perspective: “Many are
the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that
prevails.” This verse reminds me of my mom’s encouraging
words during that little tantrum so many years ago.
The Lord knows the end from the beginning. He has a
purpose for allowing every outcome, and our job is to trust
Him even when all we can see is an incomplete picture (2
Corinthians 5:7).
Maybe the puzzle you’re trying to solve today is missing
a few pieces too. It’s okay. Just remember that God holds
your whole life in His hands, even the details you can’t see.
Don’t get caught up in what you expect the finished picture
to be. There are lessons and moments of joy in your journey
that you would miss if the Lord revealed everything at once.
If you knew the process, you might not choose to do the hard
things, but then you’d miss the beauty along the way.
Trust God to give you what you need to do your part and
leave the missing pieces to Him.
CHRISTINA KIMBREL serves as VL’s production manager. Once incarcerated,
she now ministers hope to those held captive by their past and current
circumstances as she shares the message of healing she found in Jesus.
VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM
Issue 04 / 2022
13

A Prisoner of Hope
THE STORY OF THOMAS THIBAULT
My name is Thomas Thibault, and this is my life story.
I am also known as inmate #W04843; my friends call
me T. Bo. Currently, my home is within the Florida
Department of Corrections, where I am serving four
life sentences without parole. I am a blessed man, a
prisoner of hope (Zechariah 9:12).
You probably think I’m crazy. I know.
How could someone say that being behind
bars for the rest of their life is a blessing
and that they have hope? I’ll explain. Let
me start by telling you how I ended up here.
There’s nothing major or tragic that I
can point to from my youth that would help
explain my circumstances. My mother was
loving, and she raised me right. I had a
great little sister and good friends too. I
enjoyed sports and worked hard in school.
In my eyes, the worst thing I did was
occasionally experiment with marijuana
and have sex with my girlfriend. Wasn’t
that what most teens did?
At 17, I became a single father. But I took
responsibility for my actions, and before
my daughter’s first birthday, I had graduated
from high school and received sole
custody of her.
I went to work immediately and landed
an excellent job with great benefits at a
nationwide company. I enrolled my baby
girl in a private daycare where she learned
Spanish. We often went on trips to Disney
and other amusement parks. We lived on a
nice piece of property that I was renting to
own. Life was good; we were good.
I continued experimenting with weed
and even sold some on the side, but that
didn’t seem like a big deal. Little did I know
that this drug would be a gateway to a life
of hell, with the devil himself as my guide.
Because I was selling weed, I often met
people who did other drugs, including
cocaine. When they offered it to me, I
thought, why not? I ignored the voice inside,
telling me to walk away. I blocked the
knowledge that several family members
struggled with addiction and that I, too,
could become an addict. I tried it.
At first, I used only on the weekends.
14 Issue 04 / 2022 VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM

PHOTO COURTESY OF THE FLORIDA DOC
I had to provide for my daughter, so I
remained committed to my job, our
home, and her. She had been my saving
grace for many years, but my love for my
child would be no match for my growing
addiction.
Within eight months, I was a full-blown
addict who used cocaine daily at work and
home. I took my daughter with me to drug
houses and left her in my work truck while
I smoked crack. How low can you go?
My addiction led to paranoia, and I
imagined the FBI was coming to get me.
I lost everything—my job, car, home, and
daughter. But that was okay—I wanted to
be left alone with my new love, cocaine.
I intentionally pushed my family and all
responsibilities away. I sent my daughter
off to live elsewhere and hit the streets
with a vengeance.
I stayed up for days under the influence
of cocaine, robbing, stealing, and sleeping
with strange women. Kind, hardworking,
lovable Tommy was gone, and a monster
with no regard for anyone or anything had
taken his place. All I cared about now was
supporting my addiction, no matter what.
On Thanksgiving morning 1998, I did
something only a monster could do. I entered
the home of three innocent people
and killed them during a robbery. I was
arrested and booked in the Palm Beach
County Jail five days later.
You would think that after committing
such a horrific crime and facing such a
dismal future, I would cry out to God. But
I didn’t. Instead, I continued to get high
and live a lie. I had never seen any need
for God in my life; I always figured I could
handle things on my own.
My mother had taken me to church
when I was a kid, hoping I’d get to know the
Lord, but that didn’t work. Besides, I knew
I deserved to be locked up—why bring God
into my situation now? He wouldn’t want
me anyway. I was a monster.
Two years later, in 2001, a judge gave me
a death sentence for each murder and one
life sentence for the robbery. I accepted his
sentence as a fate well deserved for what
WHATEVER YOU’RE FACING, YOU
MUST KNOW THAT IT ISN’T THE END.
IT IS THE BEGINNING.
I had done. On September 25, 2001, I was
moved to death row.
“You know you’re going to die here,” another
prisoner called out to me not long
after I arrived. But as I sat in my dark 6 x
9 cell, I couldn’t accept his words as truth.
Deep down, I felt a strange stirring of hope.
I had no idea where it was coming from.
Surprisingly, I remained on death row
for only two years and two days, and then I
was shipped off to the Palm Beach County
Jail. My death sentences were overturned
on a technicality.
While the attorneys fought my case, I
joined a Faith and Character dorm run by
a man named Gino. There, he told me how
God had sent His Son, Jesus, to die for my
sin (John 3:16).
God opened my spiritual eyes to
under stand the depth of His love for
humanity—even murderers like me. And
when He poured His love into my heart, I
believed in Him (Romans 5:5). Through
my faith in Jesus, I came to know God
Thomas uses his
experience and faith
to help others find
forgiveness and
freedom in Christ.
Pictured from L to R
are Chaplain Tillman,
Pedro Valdes, Thomas
Thibault,Miguel Rosa,
Juan Berrios, and
Chaplain Scheetz.
and felt the genuine presence of His Holy
Spirit (John 14:6).
Not long after that, God gave me an
incredible gift through the selfless act of
the mother of one of my victims. She told
me that God’s saving grace had enabled
her to forgive me for killing her son. Her
gracious act made the reality of God’s love
sink even deeper into my heart. (Incredibly,
this lady had approached my mother
during my original court hearing and extended
similar love, grace, and comfort.
She had recognized that my mother was
also a victim of my crimes.)
I stood firm in my faith for a while after
returning to prison. But then I took my
eyes off the Lord and focused on my surroundings.
Ultimately, I returned to doing
and selling drugs and drinking buck.
Soon, I was living deep in the underworld
of prison life.
I was often sent to confinement as punishment
for my actions. After one 90-day
confinement stay, my family came to visit
VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM
Issue 04 / 2022
15

me. My mom made it clear that she was
upset by how I was living. “Tommy,” she
said, “God has given you a second chance
at life—something your victims never
got. And here you are, throwing away His
precious gift. And rather disrespectfully,
I might add!”
“I’m just doing what men do, Mom,” I
replied. Then she proceeded to share her
definition of a real man with me. Funny
Nearly three years ago, I joined the Faith
and Character Dorm at Taylor C.I. and began
leading programs. There, I discovered
God’s purpose for me.
He showed me that even in prison, I
have an incredible mission to share the
goodness of God with others. Every day,
fect man, but because of Christ, I have
hope despite serving four life sentences.
You can have hope in Christ, too.
Whatever you’re facing, you must know
that it isn’t the end. It’s the beginning. If
you’ll let Him, God will reveal His love,
grace, and purpose to you in powerful
I’M NOT A PERFECT MAN, BUT BECAUSE
OF CHRIST, I HAVE HOPE DESPITE SERVING
FOUR LIFE SENTENCES.
though, it didn’t include any of the things
I was doing.
Back in my cell, I contemplated what
my mother had said. God had used her
to get my attention. I grabbed my Bible
and opened it. Matthew 6:26 (NIV) quickly
caught my attention: “Look at the birds of
the air; they do not sow or reap or store
away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father
feeds them. Are you not much more
valuable than them?”
God used this simple verse to remind
me of His love, provision, and care for
me. And my heart responded, “Okay, God,
enough is enough. If this verse is true, if
You’ll really care for me for the rest of my
life behind these bars, I will put down all
this dumb stuff I’m holding on to and follow
You. I’m all Yours, and I’m all-in.”
It’s been eight years since I committed
to trust God with my future and get serious
about my faith. And He’s never failed me.
As I’ve made my home in Him and tried
to glorify Him with my actions and words,
He has given me a fruitful life, even behind
bars. He’s also helped my behavior change.
I have been free from a DR (disciplinary
report) for four years, and I remain sober.
It’s been a tough fight, but the closer
I move toward God, the more I leave my
old lifestyle and thoughts behind.
I have the privilege of leading men away
from their dead-end lives and into the
loving arms of Jesus. I get to help others
become prisoners of hope too!
Now can you see why I feel so blessed?
Not once did God give up on me. Instead,
on death row, He planted a seed of hope
inside my heart and drew me to Himself.
He forgave my sin, gave me the promise
of eternal life, and now He helps me stand
strong against my addiction. I’m not a perways.
You don’t have to be a prisoner to
your circumstances; you can choose to
be a prisoner of hope.
Open your heart to God today. Let go
of the dead-end ways of this world, and
you’ll discover His blessings for yourself.
THOMAS THIBAULT helps incarcerated men discover
freedom in Christ, even though he’s serving
four life sentences in the Florida Department of
Corrections.
The loving words of his
mother helped Thomas
surrender to Christ. Here,
she’s holding a photo graph of
Thomas about the same age
he committed his crimes.
16 Issue 04 / 2022 VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM

STEPPING FORWARD
Jesus warns us against this throughout His Word.
(See John 12:43; Galatians 1:10; Philippians 2:3–4.)
I realized this had to change one day when I was
stuck in a traffic jam and praying about a relationship
I could not fix. No matter what I did, my relationship
with this person remained broken. I asked
God to help it become an example of forgiveness
and grace. And at that moment, He prompted me,
“Turn your heart to Me.”
As I type these words, they look absurdly simple
and not possibly a great epiphany. But truthfully,
for me, they were. That moment is when I began
to wonder what my life would look like if I focused
more on God than I did worrying about what other
people thought of me. More importantly, I wondered
how it might strengthen my relationship with
the Lord. (See Ecclesiastes 2:26; Colossians 1:10.)
I remembered the words to an old hymn by Helen
Howarth Lemmel:
Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face,
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim,
In the light of His glory and grace.
God’s Mercy
Set This People
Pleaser Free
ACCORDING TO THE MERRIAM-WEBSTER DICTIONARY, a people pleaser
is “a person who has an emotional need to please others.” I am surprised
that my picture isn’t right next to that definition. I’ve been a people pleaser
for years. But once I took a closer look at this issue, I discovered most people
pleasers are selfish—myself included.
Sure, I cared about others. But that was not the driving force behind my
decisions. I did things for other people so they would like me. I volunteered
for all the jobs at my children’s schools so everyone would think I was one of
those moms who has it all together.
I tried to make perfect dinners for my guests so they would think I was a
good cook. I attempted (pretty big emphasis on attempt) to keep my house tidy
so others would think I was a good housekeeper. At work, I offered ideas and
went out of my way to help with projects so my coworkers would think I was
smart. And when my relationships with family and friends were rocky, I spent
a lot of time trying to fix them.
BY KRISTI DEWS DALE
Quite simply, my motivation for almost everything I did was skewed. I was
only worried about myself. My life was all about my selfish need to be accepted
and admired by the world. I was living to please people and not God. But
After that moment, I committed myself to spending
more time with the Lord. I devoted myself to
more intimate prayer time and reading and meditating
on His Word. And as a result, I received
overwhelming grace and mercy from the Father
as I repented for my misplaced motives.
James 2:13 NIV says, “Mercy triumphs over judgment.”
Oh, it does. Receiving God’s mercy for my sin
helped me learn to dismiss the opinions of others.
Somehow, it became necessary to forgive those who
might have unfairly judged me instead of working
harder to gain their acceptance. As a result, my time
sitting in the Lord’s presence became a blessing,
new ministry opportunities opened, and I received
a calming peace in my spirit.
Friend, if you struggle with people pleasing, I encourage
you to “turn your eyes upon Jesus” today.
The joy, peace, and mercy the Lord pours over you
will be precious. You will experience His steadfast
love as you walk in His faithfulness (Psalm 26:2–3),
and you will notice that your concern for others’
needs will become more significant than your own
need for their approval.
KRISTI DEWS DALE is a wife and the mother of four
amazing children. She holds a master’s degree in public
health and is an adjunct business instructor at a local college.
VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM
Issue 04 / 2022
17

L
THE STORY OF DARRYL STRAWBERRY
ess than 1 percent of high school Being chosen to represent teams like
baseball players make it to the the Mets, the Dodgers, the Giants, and the
Major Leagues. I was one of the Yankees is indescribable. If you’ve ever
fortunate ones. Raw talent and a determination
to prove my worth to a father who severance it takes to overcome ongoing
competed athletically, you know the per-
said I’d never amount to anything paved physical pain, setbacks, and mental frustration,
as well as tough competition and
the way to my becoming an 8-time all-star,
4-time World Series champion, and a New naysayers. To have success at any level of
York Mets Hall of Famer.
sports takes discipline and sacrifice.
The New York Mets drafted me straight
out of high school and sent me to play for
the Kingsport Mets in the Appalachian
League. I was the number one draft pick
at 18 years old.
My manager reminded me daily, “Making
it to the big leagues takes a lot of work.
You might get there if you focus on your
goal and train for it.” There was no guarantee,
but I hoped that if I kept my head down
and played hard, I’d get to prove myself in
the majors one day.
So you can imagine my excitement
when, in the spring of 1983, I got the call.
I was preparing to play another game for
Kingsport when the blessed words, “We
want you, Darryl,” came down from above.
The New York Mets were calling me up.
I tried to play it cool and act like it was no
big deal the day I walked into the NY Mets
clubhouse. But it was a big deal. There, in
a room with some of MLB’s greatest, hung
a Mets uniform in a locker with my name
on it—Strawberry.
Team members welcomed me into their
prestigious club with handshakes and
slaps on the back. They had heard about
the tall, gangly kid who, according to the
media, was supposed to be the next Ted
Williams. They welcomed my talent, especially
if it could help lead them to a World
Series championship title.
My first few games were rocky. I was
playing with the big boys now; settling in
would take time. The media was harsh,
but I stayed focused. And then, one night,
it all came together. Crack! The ball went
soaring. I started running. And the crowd
went wild. I was on my way to becoming
Rookie of the Year.
As a Met, I had everything I thought
would make me happy. Lucrative contracts,
fancy cars, huge houses, and lots
of women. I had man’s applause, accolades,
power, and prestige. Heads turned when
I walked into a room, and opportunities
came running.
Most importantly for me, being a Met
provided a place to belong and a sense of
worth. It was proof that I was a somebody
and that I had done something right.
For most of my young life, I had heard
PHOTO BY REUTERS/ED BETZ (UNITED STATES)
18 Issue 04 / 2022 VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM

PHOTO BY PCN PHOTOGRAPHY
otherwise. My abusive, alcoholic father told
me daily that I was worthless. “You’re no
good, boy. You’ll never amount to nothin’.”
Dad made it clear through his words and
actions that he didn’t want me.
My mother, a godly woman, tried to
reassure me of my worth. She loved me
and my siblings dearly and taught us
Christian values. But the scars left by
my father’s abuse and harsh words took
precedence. No matter how successful I
became, I couldn’t shake the belief that I
was a worthless failure.
Placing my worth in being a professional
athlete was dangerous, however. Being
a Met was a temporary position, as was
being a Dodger, a Giant, and a Yankee.
It didn’t matter how many home runs I
hit, how many bases I stole, or how many
outs I forced—eventually there’d be a day
when the stadium lights would go down, I’d
clean out my locker, and I’d return home
for good.
Some of my career endings came by
choice. Frustrated or disappointed, I’d
seek a change, like when I left the Mets,
became a free agent, and signed with the
Dodgers. That move brought me to sign
the second-highest contract in baseball
at that time—over 20 million dollars. Most
career endings, however, were forced upon
me due to my poor performance, sports
injuries, surgeries, cancer, and of course,
my bad behavior.
I was an out-of-control alcoholic, a drug
and sex addict, and a womanizer for the
17 years I played professional ball. Teams
grew tired of the negative attention my
poor choices brought to their franchises.
It didn’t matter that I was still playing
well and helping lead them to World Series
championships. I was too much of a
liability and distraction. My IRS scandal,
domestic abuse charges, drug use, and
incarceration caused sensational, national
headlines. I was no longer worth their
investment.
No matter the reason, being released
was always an incredible blow to my
self-esteem. Perhaps my most humiliating
moment came when the Yankees
didn’t renew my contract after a string of
injuries. I was forced to play in an independent
league up north that, unlike the
minor league teams, wasn’t even affiliated
with a major league franchise.
I wasn’t a prima donna or anything, but
I was a world champion and an all-star. I
was Darryl Strawberry, for goodness sakes!
And I had left Yankee Stadium to play
for a team I’d never heard of, in a league I’d
never heard of, with washed-out veterans
and aspiring teens. I wanted to quit, but I
couldn’t. Playing ball was the only thing I
knew how to do and the only place I ever
further were my two failed marriages, the
loss of my six children, and an inability to
escape the addiction I struggled with daily.
Throughout my career, I experienced
regular seasons of depression. There were
days I couldn’t even get out of bed to make
it to the ball field. Other days, I tried to comfort
my broken, rejected heart by hitting
the streets, hanging out in crack houses
and bars, and visiting the bedrooms of
women I didn’t know.
This belief that I was a failure—a big
fat zero, an absolute nobody—led to my
IN THESE LOW POINTS OF MY LIFE,
THOUGH, I STILL HEARD
GOD WHISPERING THE WORDS I’D
ALWAYS LONGED TO HEAR:
“I WANT YOU, DARRYL.”
felt I belonged. Being a baseball player had
been my identity since I was a teen.
The most painful thing about being released
was knowing that I was no longer
wanted. Every time a team said, “we don’t
want you anymore,” I heard my father’s
taunting voice: “You’re no good, boy.”
Cementing the message of those words
Opposite Page: Darryl tips his hat
during the 60th Annual Old-Timers’ Day
ceremony at Yankee Stadium in New
York, June 24, 2006.
Above: Darryl in a game against the
Houston Astros in 1986.
VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM
Issue 04 / 2022
19

destruction. I blew through the world
like a hurricane, leaving a path of rubble.
Ultimately, I lost everything, including my
family, money, houses, cars, health, career,
and reputation. And I hurt many people in
the process.
In these low points of my life, though, I
still heard God whispering the words I’d
always longed to hear: “I want you, Darryl.”
Why God would want a messed-up
knucklehead like me, I couldn’t imagine.
I was three million dollars in debt, twice
divorced, estranged from my children,
hopelessly addicted to drugs and alcohol,
and banned from Major League Baseball.
My name was mud in this world.
I had never heard the promise of 1 Corinthians
1:26–28. It teaches that God chooses
to love and use the people the world despises,
casts aside, and counts as nothing—
even those who mess up in life and hurt
others. My paraphrase of these verses is
this: God chooses the knuckleheads of this
world to join His team. Thank goodness.
Momma had taught me that God loved
and wanted me and that He had an excellent
plan for my life beyond baseball.
I believed God existed and that Jesus
Left: On April 29, 2002,
Darryl appeared in
Hillsborough County
court in Tampa,
Florida, were he was
sentenced to 18 months
in the Florida State
Prison system.
Right: Darryl’s
childhood wounds
prevented him from
being the father his
children deserved in
their youth. Pictured
here with his son,
Darryl Jr., in 1986.
NO MATTER HOW SUCCESSFUL I BECAME,
I COULDN’T SHAKE THE BELIEF THAT I WAS
A WORTHLESS FAILURE.
Christ had died for me, as John 3:16 says.
There were even moments when I’d set out
to follow Him. But they were only that—
moments. As soon as life’s trials appeared,
I returned to my old ways and the comforts
of the world, even though I knew how
destructive they were (Matthew 13:1–25).
Over and over, Momma warned me,
“You can run, Darryl, and you can hide.
But eventually, you’ll have to surrender to
the Lord and do what God calls you to do.”
She was right. Eventually, I surrendered
and stepped into my calling, but not until
my stubborn, rebellious self took me to my
rock bottom. That day, I finally said, “Okay,
God. You can have me. I’m ready to go allin
with You. I’ll join Your team and start
playing according to Your rules. I refuse
to be a spectator any longer. Put me in the
game, Coach!”
And you know what? Despite all those
times before that I’d ignored or refused
Him, the minute I said those words, God
welcomed me with open arms and without
the tiniest hint of judgment (Luke
15:11–32).
Accepting my place on God’s team is the
best decision I ever made. My life changed
as I committed to my relationship with Jesus
and began building my life on biblical
principles and living in the power of the
Holy Spirit. God helped me become the
man I’d always longed to be.
I’d spent years willing myself to be a better
son, husband, and father, but I failed
every time. I joined recovery programs,
entered rehab centers, and even went to
prison. But none of that brought lasting
change. Why? Because willpower, incarceration,
and most recovery programs don’t
deal with underlying issues. They only try
to stop behavior.
I was a kid who had been rejected and
abused by his father. I was a man who had
made terrible mistakes. My heart was full
of anger, bitterness, self-loathing, fear, distrust,
unforgiveness, and pain. It housed
physical and emotional traumas that
continually overrode my best intentions
and efforts.
An unhealed heart is a dangerous thing—
but, thanks be to God, when I surrendered
my heart to Him, He gave me victory over
my past trauma and present sin through
the Lord Jesus Christ (1 Corinthians 15:57).
I became a new man because Jesus healed,
fulfilled, and transformed me. It was like 2
LEFT PHOTO BY REUTERS/JOE SKIPPER RIGHT PHOTO BY JOHN BARRETT
20 Issue 04 / 2022 VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM

courages me to continue to take to God’s
field and assume my position daily as a
minister of His grace. There’s no better
place to be. World Series championship
titles, money, fame—none of these things
even come close in comparison.
If you haven’t done so already, I encourage
you to accept your place on God’s team.
God wants you, my friend. Yes, you. The
outcast. The knucklehead. The one who’s
continually swinging and missing.
You’re the one He wants to love, accept,
and use. He’s got a “uniform” with your
name on it. By faith, it’s time to put it on!
UNLIKE THE WORLD
OF BASEBALL, GOD
ISN’T IN THE BUSINESS
OF TRADING HIS
PLAYERS OR SENDING
THEM HOME. HE WILL
NEVER CUT ME LOOSE.
Let me help you. Pray with me, “God,
today by faith, I receive my place on Your
team. I’m tired of playing for the world and
sitting on the sidelines. Life apart from You
leads only to disappointment, frustration,
Darryl found purpose and a permanent place
to belong when he joined God’s team.
pressure, and pain. I’m sorry I’ve run from
You so many times. I surrender my mind
and will to You and eagerly take my place
on Your team. Use me. Forgive my sin.
Heal my heart. Renew my mind. Teach me
PHOTO COURTESY AB FORCES NEWS COLLECTION / ALAMY STOCK
Corinthians 5:17 NIV says: “Therefore, if
anyone is in Christ, the new creation has
come. The old has gone, the new is here.”
God gave me a new identity. I, Darryl
Strawberry, am now a child of God. My
worth is no longer linked to baseball or
what anyone says about me. You can find
my name on God’s roster, which is the
Lamb’s Book of Life (Revelation 3:5, 20:15).
And you know what? My place with Him
is eternal.
Unlike the world of baseball, God isn’t
in the business of trading His players or
sending them home. He will never cut me
loose. When He chose me, it was forever.
Nothing I do, nothing I don’t do, and nothing
this world sends my way can separate
me from His love (Romans 8:37).
Besides, God’s choosing me was never
based on my performance. It’s only based
on my faith in what He did for me (Ephesians
2:8–9). God sent His Son, Jesus, to
die for my sin (John 3:16). Jesus willingly
stepped up to the plate and went to bat for
me. He took the punishment for my sin,
death, so that I could have life (Romans
6:23). It’s God’s grace, not my works, that
gave me a spot on His team.
Knowing I am accepted and loved unconditionally
brings me peace. And it en-
Your ways. Put me in the game, Coach—I’m
ready to play!”
That, my friend, is the best decision
you’ll ever make. His is the greatest team
you can ever join.
DARRYL STRAWBERRY dazzled many with his
baseball career. This legend is one of the most
feared home-run hitters in baseball history. Today,
though, Darryl’s purpose and passion is serving the
Lord by speaking a message of hope and helping
others transform their lives through the power
of the Gospel. He has several published works
including Finding Your Way, Turning Your Season
Around, and The Imperfect Marriage, coauthored
with his wife, Tracy. For more information, visit
findingyourway.com.
VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM
Issue 04 / 2022
21

Trust the Process
of God’s Plan
THE STORY OF TRACY
STRAWBERRY
was 30 years old
when I hit rock bottom.
And in that low
place, I didn’t want to
hear anything about
God, let alone walk in
His ways. In fact, I blamed Him for everything
terrible that had ever happened to
me—from being molested and gang-raped
to losing my children.
I had one question for God: “Where were You?!”
Many people tried to tell me about God’s love and
goodness, but how dare they? What kind of God allows
such horrible things to happen? I didn’t want anything
to do with Him—He’d never been there for me.
Outwardly, I had become an angry, skeptical, and
downright mean woman. But beneath all that anger
and skepticism were the real reasons I had walled off
my heart from God: I didn’t feel worthy of His love or
His time.
I had lived carelessly—I knew that. I’d done incredibly
vile things and hurt countless people during my years of
active addiction. I couldn’t imagine that God would want
anything to do with a woman like me; people sure didn’t.
I was insecure and doubted God’s ability to heal my
heart. I figured not even He could deliver me from my
deep-rooted addiction to drugs and alcohol, nor could
He restore the many things that I’d destroyed in my
life—including my relationship with my children. I felt
too shattered to be repaired.
I was eight years old when my neighbor began to abuse
me sexually, but I told no one. As most abusers do, he
threatened to harm me or, worse, my family if I told
anyone what he was doing. No one would believe me
anyway, he said.
So I bore the shame, pain, and confusion of my secret
alone. By the age of 12, I could take it no longer, and
I began reaching for people and substances to bring
comfort. No one can work through that kind of trauma
independently, especially a child.
First, I started hanging out with older boys and became
sexually active. I imagined that if I gave myself to
a boy, he would fall in love with me, and I would have a
beautiful relationship like my mother and father did at
home. But with every sexual encounter, I experienced
more shame, pain, and confusion.
By 20, I was consumed by alcohol and addicted to
drugs. I stopped at nothing to feed my addictions. I made
poor choices that yielded painful consequences—the
hardest being losing custody of my three boys.
I tried to convince myself that my choices weren’t
hurting anyone other than myself. Talk about denial.
I sold myself that lie over and over again as I lay at the
bottom of many a dark, hopeless pit.
Any one of those pits should have been my rock bottom—
PHOTO COURTESY OF THE STRAWBERRY FAMILY
22 Issue 04 / 2022 VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM

the place where I decided to change—but they weren’t. I
was too stubborn to stop, look in the mirror, and initiate
change. I preferred playing the blame game and wallowing
in the mud of self-pity. It’s where I was comfortable.
That all changed, though, the day I learned I could lose
custody of my boys. That painful realization became my
rock-bottom moment in which I was ready and willing
to say, “Enough! I don’t want to live like this anymore.
I’ve got to get clean for my boys!”
I began attending Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) and
Narcotics Anonymous (NA) meetings and got serious
about doing the programs. I disciplined myself to change
my behavior, and soon I was clean and sober. Outwardly,
everyone could see the change—I was living better, and
I looked great. But inwardly, I was an empty shell of a
person. I hung on with sheer willpower, but I knew I
couldn’t continue the charade much longer. I was about
to crash.
Many of the ladies at AA and NA talked to me about
Jesus and how He had not only helped them change
their behavior but had also healed their pain and filled
their emptiness. According to them, He was the answer
for everything that ailed me.
Those women got on my last nerve, and I rejected
them in the most unkind ways. But they kept pursuing
me and telling me how Jesus could heal my broken life.
Eventually, their courageous and persistent faith broke
through the walls of my hardened heart.
It happened one afternoon after an AA meeting. A lady
from the group invited me to join her at a local café for
coffee. I was reluctant at first but finally agreed to go.
We sipped our coffees and talked for a while. I was
enjoying myself until Kim redirected the conversation
with, “Why don’t you go with me to a prayer meeting
tonight? Several of the girls from our meetings go each
week. I think you’ll like it.”
Internal walls shot up. I was furious! Kim hadn’t invited
me to coffee for friendly conversation; she was on
a quest to save my soul. What was it with these stinkin’
Jesus people?!
I declined her invitation, but Kim persisted. She recognized
that I was on the fence about following God and
got straight to her point. “Tracy, if you don’t commit to
following the Lord now, where will you go?” Before I
could respond, she answered matter-of-factly, “I’ll tell
you where. You’ll go straight into the arms of another
bad man and enter another failing relationship. You’ll
get some drugs and overdose; you’ll go right to…” She
continued giving me a list of the negative outcomes I
was sure to face.
For some reason, I didn’t grab my coffee and run.
Kim’s words were direct, but I wasn’t sensing condemnation
from her, only compassion and an urgent knowledge
that if I didn’t choose Jesus, I was headed for disaster.
I finally relented and told Kim I’d go, but I was driving
separately. The minute things got uncomfortable, I was
out of there! Well, that was my plan.
The meeting was at a tiny apartment owned by a lady
the girls called Momma. Each week, this 80-year-old
woman opened her heart and home to 30 women who,
like me, didn’t feel welcome or comfortable in a regular
church setting. She prayed with them and taught them
God’s Word.
I entered her cramped apartment, my heart surrounded
by thick, sturdy walls. No one was going to get me to
change my mind about God. But my determination was
no match for God’s Spirit. He was about to break down
those walls and enter in.
I have learned that you can
choose your sin, but you can’t
choose your consequences or
how long they will last.
I stood in a corner, contemplating my escape. But then,
the meeting started, and someone asked if anyone had
anything to share. Suddenly, it was like someone else
had taken over my body.
My hand shot up, my mouth flew open, and I told
every one how I hated God and didn’t want to be there.
There was silence. Then, I started to cry and shared
intimate details of my life. I couldn’t stop myself.
Momma put a chair in the center of the room and
asked me to sit down so she could pray over me. The
older, more experienced, prayer-warrior women circled
my chair, placed their hands on me, and began to pray.
The other girls who were still learning and healing themselves
looked on. I’ll never forget the sight and sound of
those women crying out to heaven on my behalf.
Powerful emotions rushed to the surface of my heart
VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM
Issue 04 / 2022
23

Above: Part of
trusting God’s
process was
releasing her
husband Darryl
to God’s care.
Today, they are
both ministers
of God’s grace.
as they prayed, and then suddenly,
like a river dam, things
broke loose within me. God’s
Spirit took down the walls and
released the pain I’d carried
since childhood.
Momma knew there had been
a breakthrough. The women
stopped praying, and Momma
gently held my face in her
hands. “Tracy,” she said, “God
has a plan for your life. Trust the
process.” I wasn’t sure what she
meant, but I would learn soon
enough.
From that day forward, Kim prayed with me, taught
me God’s Word, and answered my many questions. She
refused to leave me alone to figure out what it meant to
be a follower of Christ on my own. Instead, she helped
me develop a solid foundation of faith by discipling me
so that I wouldn’t return to my destructive ways.
The only thing Kim asked me to do in return was to
call her every morning at 9:00 sharp. This check-in call
was to keep me accountable and prove my commitment.
“Tracy,” she said, “the key is desiring God above
everything else. Make your relationship with Him the
priority of your life. There’s a real enemy out there who
seeks your destruction. You must be willing to fight for
the life God has planned for you.”
Kim knew I still harbored anger and doubt toward
God, but she encouraged me to press through those
emotions, embrace my faith, and discover more about
Jesus for myself. I did, and God faithfully revealed Himself
to me along the way.
Over the next year, God filled the empty places of my
heart with His peace, joy, and hope. He was working
in my life, and I was sure He was about to grant me
custody of my kids.
I searched the scriptures for God’s promises and boldly
declared them over my life. “You’ve got this, God. All
things are possible for You. You are a restorer of lost
things and a rebuilder of broken things. You are the One
who brings dead things back to life. There is nothing
too hard for You.”
I can’t even describe how devastated and confused I
was when things didn’t turn out as I had hoped. I’d done
everything I was supposed to do, and yet, I lost custody
of my three boys to my ex-husband. It’s a mother’s worst
nightmare. Where was God?
Your victory
will only be as
good as your
participation
with God.
“Aren’t You supposed to be making everything right
in my life?” I cried. My sorrow
quickly turned to anger.
The blame game reignited
in my heart, and I blamed
God for the consequences
I was facing—even though
they were the result of my
own actions.
I had given God my everything
for the past year. I’d
turned from my old ways,
followed Him, and often
looked the fool. I’d taken my
boys to church and started
teaching them about the
Lord. And now He was taking
them away? I didn’t understand. How could He?
The hard truth that I was denying was that this was
my doing, not God’s. These were my consequences, not
God’s will. I have learned that you can choose your sin,
but you can’t choose your consequences or how long
they will last. And this one—being estranged from my
kids—would last for many years to come.
Old feelings of betrayal flooded my heart and mind.
PHOTO BY WENN RIGHTS LTD / ALAMY STOCK PHOTO
24 Issue 04 / 2022 VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM

PHOTO COURTESY OF STRAWBERRY FAMILY
I was sure God had abandoned me again and had purposely
brought this pain into my life. I wrestled with
my faith for months. But then, one day, I remembered
Momma’s words, “Tracy, God has a plan for your life.
Trust the process.”
Was this part of God’s process? Could He still have
a plan? And could He be working that plan out for my
good as Romans 8:28 promised?
I stood at a crossroads of faith. Either I could trust
God’s plan, process, and His Word, or I could turn back.
I thought back to the painful pits of the past. Did I want
to return to the devil’s den? I knew it was a hopeless pit
of death and destruction (Hebrews 10:39). There was
nothing for me there.
No, I decided. I would press on with God. But I knew
that this time, I’d have to completely surrender my life to
His love and care. My faith could no longer be based on
earthly evidence of what I saw God doing or not doing in
my life. I resolved to become the mom my kids deserved,
whether I ever got them back or not.
That decision was a hard blow to Satan’s plan. His
greatest goal was to lead me to question God and be
angry with Him so I’d turn away from my faith. Satan
wanted me back in the pit where I was no threat to him.
He lost in a big way that day.
Still, God’s process was not easy or quick. Some
days my heart was so heavy with grief and frustration,
I couldn’t breathe.
“Oh God,” I’d cry. “Where’s my breakthrough? When
will I be made whole? When will I get to where I want to
be?” I couldn’t see a victorious end. I couldn’t see how I’d
ever be a mom again to my boys. But God could see my
freedom, wholeness, and restoration; He sees the end
of our lives from the beginning (Isaiah 46:10).
Often my heart grew heavy, but God would whisper,
“I’ve got you, Tracy. Keep going.” He beckoned me to
draw ever closer to Him, to enter His throne room of
grace where I’d find the mercy, strength, and help I
needed (Hebrews 4:16). His presence and words were
compressions to my heart and breath to my lungs. God’s
grace was there for me, even in the darkest days and
toughest consequences.
In the throne room, I asked the Lord to shed His light
into the dark parts of my life and uncover truths that
would help me build a better future (Psalm 139:23–24).
I didn’t want anything to hinder my victory.
Day by day, God gently led me back to my past. Together,
we faced my sin and the traumas other people’s sins
had caused in my life. And in the process, I discovered
healing and hope.
Today, on the other side of that long and often painful
process, I am thankful. God’s plan and His process gave
me the time and avenue to healing. His way enabled me
to vanquish the sin that had repeatedly conquered me.
Had I gotten my way, I would have brought the same
broken mom back into my kids’ lives. They and I deserved
better.
Because I trusted the Lord, I now have a beautiful
relationship with my boys, I’m married to a mighty man
of God, and I am a minister of the hope of Jesus Christ.
To God be the glory.
Friend, even if you can’t imagine it, God has a victorious
end planned for your life too. Trust His love for
you and His process, no matter how painful or long. You
must know, living apart from God will never soothe your
soul or bring lasting change to your life.
Be willing to make difficult choices, take practical
steps, stay God’s course even if it doesn’t seem to make
sense, and fight for the freedom you and your family
deserve. Your victory will only be as good as your participation
with God.
No, it won’t be easy. But it will be worth it. You are
worth it!
Just like Romans 8:28 says, God
has worked everything out for
my good and His glory.
DR. TRACY STRAWBERRY is an international speaker, published author, CEO, ordained
minister, and wife of baseball legend, Darryl Strawberry. She is passionate about equipping
individuals to live lives of freedom and purpose in Christ. She is the author of several
publications including Clean, Sober & Saved, a globally established, Christ-centered
recovery curriculum. For more information, visit findingyourway.com.
Another part of
God’s redemption
story came through
the restoration
of Tracy’s
relationship with
her three sons.
VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM
Issue 04 / 2022
25

STEPPING FORWARD
Walk through
the Valley
BY KRISTI OVERTON JOHNSON
MONTHS AGO, I SPENT SEVERAL days
with my sweet momma in the hospital. It
was a privilege to serve someone who has
sacrificed so much for me. Watching her
during those first few days, I was reminded
how sometimes we have to go through
painful experiences to reach our desired
destination.
For years, Mom had pressed through tremendous
back pain. She went and went
until she couldn’t go anymore. Everyone
knew it was time for surgery. She sought
wise counsel and made an informed decision.
Then she walked bravely toward the
operating room while Dad and I remained
in the waiting room.
Twelve long hours later, we were finally
reunited. The minute we walked in, we
could see she was in horrible pain. I wanted
to get on that hospital bed and take her
place, but I couldn’t. No one could.
The pain was intense with new symptoms
in different places. And they were
just as painful, if not more, than the pain
she had experienced before the surgery.
Nerves were waking up, and they weren’t
happy. And then there was the stomach
pain. It was unexpected and worse than her
back. She lay in bed for days in agony. The
pain made her think she’d made a mistake.
She didn’t think she could handle the days
ahead. She wished she could undo what
she had done.
My perspective on the situation was
different though. The doctor had said the
surgery was a success, so I was sure Mom
would be okay and that these symptoms
would eventually dissipate. I had no doubt
that soon she’d be feeling and moving better
than she had in years.
But I also knew that before she felt better,
she would have to endure more discomfort.
With God’s help, she did.
I share this story because I know many
of you are in that “in between” season of
life right now. You’ve made a difficult decision
to move forward; you’ve weighed
the cost, sought wise counsel, taken that
step—and now you find yourself in a dark,
lonely, and uncomfortable place. Your pain
is so intense that you’re asking, “What in
the world have I done?!” Some of you are
even wishing you could go back to where
you were before.
Please, don’t let the moment’s pain keep
you from the “better” that lies ahead. Press
on with God. Better days will come.
26 Issue 04 / 2022 VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM

STEPPING FORWARD
Here’s how to move forward:
LIFT YOUR EYES PAST THE PAIN. Even
the best life decisions can bring pain and
unexpected challenges, but that doesn’t
mean they were wrong. Ask God to help
you look beyond your current situation and
show you where you are going. If you focus
on your pain, you’ll lose your will to go on.
The fervent prayers of a righteous person
bring great results (James 5:16).
And then, draw close to God. He promises
to be your comforter, peace, wisdom,
guide, strength, joy, and healer. When you
seek Him, He’ll reveal Himself in powerful
ways (James 4:8) and shower you
with loving-kindness and compassion
(Psalm 145:9).
LIFT YOUR GAZE TO THE LORD. God
is bigger than anything you are going
through. Jesus is the name above all names
(Philippians 2:9). Choose to magnify the
Lord above your circumstances, because
what you magnify is what holds prominence
in your heart and mind.
REMEMBER WHO IS WITH YOU. God
promises that you are never alone on your
journey. The Great I Am is with you; He has
not and will not abandon you. Ever. (See
Deuteronomy 31:8.) He walks beside you
even through the valley of death.
Notice that Psalm 23:4 says you are
walking through the valley; you aren’t to
live there. God will bring you through the
darkness in His perfect timing. He will
bring what He has begun in your life to
completion (Philippians 1:6).
TRUST THE PROCESS. Reaching your
intended destination takes time and hard
work. Sometimes it looks like you’re going
in the wrong direction. It might even hurt.
Trust the process and refuse to turn back
no matter how hard it gets. Don’t panic or
retreat when you hit difficulties or when
life becomes uncomfortable. You can only
reach a destination if you stay the course.
There are no shortcuts.
HOLD ON TO GOD’S PROMISES,
PRAY, AND DRAW CLOSE. God’s Word
never returns void; it goes forth and accomplishes
what God says it will do (Isaiah
55:11). Speak the Word over your life. Pray.
REMEMBER WHERE YOU ARE GO-
ING AND WHY. You made the decision
to move forward for a reason. It’s usually
because you weren’t where you needed to
be. Write that reason down so you don’t
forget what it was like back there but keep
the vision of where you’re going in front
of you too. Remember why you want to be
there. Let that be your motivation to keep
pressing on.
DON’T LET EMOTIONS DICTATE
YOUR NEXT MOVE. Many feelings arise
during intense seasons of pain. Hopelessness,
fear, doubt, and confusion are just a
few of the dark emotional clouds that will
try to overtake you and distort your judgment.
They’ll cloud your vision, and you
might think you made the wrong choice.
Capture those negative thoughts before
they capture you (2 Corinthians 10:5).
God’s chosen people experienced some
unexpected, tough times in the wilderness,
and they let fear convince them that God’s
plan was wrong. There they were, steps
away from their promised land, begging to
go back to slavery and forced labor (Exodus
16:3). Really?!
They complained, grumbled, and outright
doubted God—which only led to an
extended “in between” season, stuck between
Egypt and their destination. God
had something so much better in store, if
only they would have trusted Him and kept
moving forward in obedience.
The same is true for you. Do not be like
those who shrink back and are destroyed.
Have faith and press on (Hebrews 10:39).
TAKE ONE DAY AT A TIME. If you look
at how far you have to go, you’ll be overcome
with fear and doubt. Instead, take
each day as it comes and remember—the
grace of God that got you through yesterday
will get you through today, tomorrow, and
all the days to come. His grace is sufficient
for every challenge you will face, for as long
as you must face it (2 Corinthians 12:9).
And along the way, celebrate the victories,
big or small. Thank God for progress.
SURROUND YOURSELF WITH WISE
COUNSEL. It’s essential to have trusted
people by your side who can see the bigger
picture and who will encourage you. You
also need people who will speak the truth
in love. Listen to them. Sometimes they
can see things you can’t.
KRISTI OVERTON JOHNSON encourages and
equips people for victory through her writings,
speaking engagements, and prison ministry. To
learn more, go to kojministries.org.
VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM
Issue 04 / 2022
27

IT’S
GOING
TO
BE
OKAY
THE STORY OF
JOSHUA BROWN
“
Y
ou might as well give up. There’s nothing you
can do to get out of this mess. Your life is over!”
I was 20 years old and facing a possible life
sentence plus 55 years for various charges,
including armed burglary with battery. I had
blown it for good this time.
I begged and pleaded with God to get me out
of my circumstances, but nothing changed. My
attorney advised me to take a plea deal for 10
years rather than risk being sent away for life.
I acted like a tough guy as I signed my name
on that line. But when the officers returned
me to my dorm in the jail, I cried like a baby.
I’ll never forget the words a Christian inmate
said to me, “It’s going to be okay. You’re going
to make it.”
I couldn’t imagine how he could be right.
I’d been in trouble with the law before, and
I’d served a month in jail and a few days in
a juvenile center. That was enough for me to
know that the next 10 years were going to be
incredibly hard.
Fear overwhelmed me. I wasn’t going to be okay. I probably
wasn’t going to make it. Guilt followed close behind the
fear. My entire family was suffering because of my actions.
I’d created many messes for my mom and siblings to clean
up over the years, but this was on a whole new level.
I believed in God and had often prayed to Him. Once, when
I was twelve, a pastor told me that I had a calling on my life
by God to be a preacher. It was an interesting thought, but
there was no way I was going to get serious about following
God, at least not then. I had too many things I wanted to do
first. I’d think about God after I did all that other stuff. Only
I never found an end to what I wanted to do.
Now, I was regretting that decision. Not only had I messed
up, surely I’d destroyed any plans God had for my life. Why
would He even want someone like me? Surely, He’d written
me off for good this time.
To my 20-year-old mind, a 10-year sentence was an eternity.
How could my life have any value or purpose if I were
in prison? All I could think about was finding some way to
end my miserable existence.
My road to prison began when our family’s home got
robbed. We called the authorities, but when they couldn’t
PHOTO BY LUKE DOWNER/JESUS CHURCH
28 Issue 04 / 2022 VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM

do anything to help us, something in me snapped. Before
that, I had walked the straight and narrow. After? I couldn’t
get over that someone had just walked into our house and
taken what they wanted—and nobody did anything about
it! I was frustrated yet amazed at the same time.
My mother had struggled to provide for us kids for years.
I’d worked two jobs all through high school myself. We had
tried to get things the right way, yet we still ended up with
nothing. It just wasn’t right. I was sick of working so hard,
and for what? I decided I was going to take what I wanted
from now on too.
I know this was wrong thinking; I probably knew it back
then. But to my teenage mind, it made perfect sense. I hit
the streets and joined a gang.
It wasn’t long before that criminal mindset took root,
grew, and choked out anything good in me. I no longer cared
for anyone other than myself, nor did I acknowledge authority.
I became my own boss and left a trail of destruction
in my wake.
John 10:10 tells us that Jesus came into this world to
give life, while Satan comes to steal, kill, and destroy. The
way I look at it, we either bring life into this world as Jesus
did, or we bring chaos, destruction, and death like Satan.
Every one of us is either on Team Jesus or on Team Satan.
I was on Team Satan—the kill, steal, and destroy team—
for sure.
God gave me countless chances to make the switch and
get my life right, but I squandered every one. From time to
time, I would play the part of a Christian. I’d go to church,
read my Bible, and even drop money in the offering plate—
drug money, that is. But the rest of the week, I immersed
myself in street life, partying it up.
I ran hard from God and His call on my life. But Momma
was praying back home.
She never gave up on me, not even during my years of
rebellion. Day after day, she took me to the throne of God,
knowing He was the only One who could help her son. Because
of her prayers, I am alive, sane, and living a productive
life today.
I spent my first four years in prison in the Florida Panhandle.
There, I got serious about attending chapel and
learning more about God. I immersed myself in religious
activities, served other inmates, and changed my behavior.
Many good things happened in my life during these years,
but my heart was far from God.
I was a religious man, but I was not a lover or follower of
Jesus Christ. I served God and others only out of a sense
of duty. I was like a Pharisee—interested only in following
religious rules and looking good to others. God wasn’t impressed
with my religious actions and biblical knowledge;
He wanted my heart. I came to know this after I was transferred
to Avon Park Correctional.
There, I witnessed God’s love in action
through the loving-kindness of incarcerated
Christian brothers. These men were deeply
in love with Jesus, and it showed. Their
presence lit up that prison’s darkness; Christ
in them changed the atmosphere, and that
changed me.
I watched in awe as these men thrived daily,
even though they lived behind bars. Their lives
had purpose; hope sparkled in their eyes. I
wanted what they had—a relationship with
God, His hope, and an authentic life purpose.
No more religious activity. And no more being
on Team Satan.
God used those men to sharpen my walk
with Him (Proverbs 27:17). They taught me the
value of trusting God and applying His Word.
They kept me encouraged and accountable.
God wasn’t impressed with my
religious actions and biblical
knowledge; He wanted my heart.
When I’d get discouraged or off course, someone
would say, “Man up, brother. Remember
what the Word says and who you are in Christ.”
I miss that daily fellowship with my Avon
Park brothers now that I’m released. Their
love restored my hope and showed me that
God still had work for me to do. They were on
Team Jesus.
With God’s help, I served my 10-year sentence.
It wasn’t easy, but it was filled with purpose.
God gave me His strength (Psalm 46:1;
Nehemiah 8:10; 2 Corinthians 12:9–10) and
guided me with His wisdom (James 1:5). The
Lord also met my needs (Philippians 4:19).
Matthew 6:33 says, “Seek first his kingdom
and his righteousness, and all these things will
be given to you as well” (NIV). I attest to the
truth of this verse. I never lacked anything in
prison. Before I could even think of it or desire
it, God had already prepared it. He never
missed a detail. All I had to do was seek Him
and trust Him. He took care of the rest.
I was released from prison on August 6,
2019, and God continues to meet my needs.
I am amazed at my life now. And to think, I
wanted to throw it all away.
VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM
Issue 04 / 2022
29

God has blessed Joshua with a beautiful family. Pictured with his wife,
Corie, at their wedding (above), and with his friends, Calvin McLeod
and Avier Johnson (right). All three men served time together and
ministered to men at Avon Park Correctional.
God has abundantly blessed me with relationships
and opportunities. He has given
me a beautiful wife—a mighty woman of God.
In January, we are expecting our first baby.
God opened doors for me to minister at
Multi cultural Family Church in Brandon,
Florida. I also serve on the board of directors
at a nonprofit called Society-First.
Through Society-First, I advocate for the
You can’t see the end of the
story right now, but God does.
And it’s a good one. Far better
than you can imagine.
rights of the incarcerated. I am even able to
minister at Avon Park Correctional. Only God
could have opened a door for me to return to
the prison where I resided, so soon after my
release. God is good; He does much more than
we can imagine (Ephesians 3:20).
Maybe you’re ready to give up. You see no
way of enduring the difficult road ahead. Just
like God helped me through 10 years of incarceration,
He will help you serve your time
too—whether in prison or elsewhere. The road ahead might
look impossible, but let me tell you what that Christian
brother said after I was sentenced: “It’s going to be okay.
You are going to make it.”
Philippians 4:13 promises that if you are on Team Jesus,
you can endure all things. He will help you. Don’t give up.
And don’t give in to Satan’s lies. You are never without hope
when you are in Christ. In Him, there is forgiveness of sin,
restoration, and redemption. He still has a great purpose
for your life.
You can’t see the end of the story right now, but God does.
And it’s a good one. Far better than you can imagine.
JOSHUA BROWN gives God all the glory for his redemption story and
for the success he has experienced in the free world as a contractor,
in his relationships, and in ministry. Today, he serves on the board of
directors at Society-First and is on staff at Multicultural Family Church
in Brandon, Florida.
WEDDING PHOTO BY DANIEL AGUILAR WITH DAZ PHOTOS
30 Issue 04 / 2022 VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM

TRANSFORMED LIVES
Look in the Mirror
BY DARRYL STRAWBERRY
I GOT DRESSED ONE MORNING AND
stared long into the mirror. I had been
married to Tracy for one year and was
ready to call it quits. I told God, “My wife is
crazy, and this relationship is nuts! I can’t
take it anymore.” I’d said the same thing
about my previous marriages.
But then, in my heart, God clearly said,
“No, Darryl. Your wife isn’t the problem,
nor is your marriage. You are.” His words
hit hard. That day in front of the mirror, I
suddenly understood that I needed to stop
playing the blame game and deal with my
insecurities, scars, and hang-ups.
For too long, I’d pointed my finger at
Tracy and called out her failures, flaws,
and character defects. I’d tried to fix her
when I was the one who needed to be fixed.
been with, and how she’d spent our money.
Tracy wasn’t the problem, though, or
the source of my insecurities. The sins of
others and my own were to blame. I was
the one fooling around and not keeping
my word, not her.
Unforgiveness was a big issue too. I
hadn’t forgiven my father for the abuse
he’d inflicted on me as a child. Nor had I
forgiven my ex-wives or anyone else who
had hurt me in the past. I held those people
TRANSFORMATION IS NEVER A ONE-TIME
PRAYER EVENT; IT IS A PROCESS THAT
MUST BE ENTERED INTO WITH GOD.
PHOTO COURTESY OF THE STRAWBERRY FAMILY
I needed to be purged of sins, addictions,
bad habits, behaviors, and attitudes.
My garbage wasn’t Tracy’s garbage; it
was mine. And until I was willing to dig
through the trash of my heart with God and
let Him do His work, every relationship I
touched would end in destruction. Why?
Because I was in them!
And I have a trail of broken relationships
to prove it.
I came into this marriage with many
deep-rooted wounds that needed healing.
As you read in my story on page 18,
I was a very injured man. But that day, in
front of that mirror, God showed me how
I could find a way to wholeness through
self-reflection.
His words weren’t meant to hurt or bring
shame. They were to bring about a conviction
of the heart that would lead to change.
God wanted me, His child, to have a better
life than what I was living.
I embarked on a journey of selfreflection
with Him that day. I prayed
persistently, “I need you, God. Clean me.
Purify me. Tear me down.” God was faithful
to jump into my mess and wade through
the stench of my heart and mind with me.
With time, He revealed that the problems
in my relationship originated in my
core issues of distrust, unforgiveness, and
fear. My trust issues came from previous
relationships and experiences with people
who’d only wanted to know me for what I
could offer them. I was afraid to trust anyone—even
Tracy, a
woman of integrity
who I knew
loved me and
loved the Lord.
But I didn’t feel
I could trust Him,
either. Who gives
unconditional love?
My lack of trust surfaced
in explosive fights with
my wife. I was suspicious
of everything she did. I
called her integrity into
question and made false
accusations about where
she had been, who she’d
VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM
Issue 04 / 2022
31

TRANSFORMED LIVES
Darryl and Tracy
use their personal
experiences and
biblical principles to
help men and women
find freedom in Christ
through their ministry,
Finding Your Way.
PHOTOS COURTESY OF THE STRAWBERRY FAMILY
Because Darryl and his wife, Tracy, entered
individual self-reflection journeys with God, they
are now experiencing a healthy and prosperous
marriage and are helping others do the same.
You can read more about their journey in their
New York Times bestseller, The Imperfect
Marriage: Help for Those Who Think It Is
Over. This publication of Howard Books was
coauthored by the couple with A. J. Gregory and
can be purchased through Amazon.
hostage in my heart, but I was the only one
I was hurting.
Unforgiveness prevented me from
finding true freedom. Bitterness filled my
heart daily, and it showed in how I treated
Tracy. When we disagreed, I’d think, “Well,
I don’t need you. I can do everything by
myself.” I would reject her emotionally
and sexually. I didn’t want her to get deep
enough into my soul to touch the real me.
Then, there was the fear factor. I was
always fearful of judgment. When you’re a
celebrity, you’re an open target. It’s probably
the most challenging aspect of star
life. Everyone’s got an opinion (usually not
a good one), and they can’t wait to share
it. I was tired of reading negative things
about me in the headlines, some of which
weren’t true. The thing that hurt the most
was hearing how I was a waste.
I was so afraid of public perception that
when I started dating Tracy and at the be-
OUTWARD CHANGE COMES ONLY IF YOU’RE
WILLING TO DO THE INSIDE WORK.
ginning of our marriage, I stopped going Do you have a history of failed relationships
too? If so, it’s time to look in the mir-
out. I became depressed and hid in the
house. From my bed, I’d ask Tracy, “Why ror, quit playing the blame game, and get
won’t God just let me die already?”
real. It’s time to be willing to listen to God’s
Her response still rings loudly, “Oh, perspective on the matter of you.
Darryl, you’re never going to get off that Your relationships will only change
easy. People like us just aren’t that lucky. when you’re willing to say, “Search me,
God has a plan for your life and for mine, God. Show me the real issues of my heart.
but we have to walk through it to get to it.” I refuse to blame others any longer. I know
My distrust, fear, and unforgiveness that ignoring the issues of my heart can
took me to low places and kept me there. only lead to destruction. Give me Your perspective
and help me become the spouse,
But that all began to change the day I
humbled myself, dug deep into the Word parent, sibling, and friend You desire me
of God, and surrendered to the work of to be.”
the Holy Spirit. The Great Physician performed
spiritual surgery on my heart and me. Outward change only comes when
Do you want a better we? Become a better
mind, changing me from the inside out. you’re willing to do the inside work.
He renewed my mind and made me into
the man He’d created me to be (Romans
12:2). That’s when I became a real man. DARRYL STRAWBERRY dazzled many with his
My wholeness, though, didn’t come in an baseball career. This legend is one of the most
feared home-run hitters in baseball history. Today,
instant. It took time. I hadn’t gotten myself
though, Darryl’s purpose and passion is serving the
into all my messes overnight, so it would Lord by speaking a message of hope and helping
take time to get out of them. I had to give others transform their lives through the power
myself grace.
of the gospel. He has several published works
including Finding Your Way, Turning Your Season
Transformation is never a one-time
Around, and The Imperfect Marriage, coauthored
prayer event; it is a process that must be with his wife, Tracy. For more information, visit
entered into with God.
findingyourway.com.
32 Issue 04 / 2022 VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM

WANT TO KNOW JESUS?
“Come to me, all you who are
weary and burdened, and I will
give you rest.” —Matthew 11:28 NIV
Jared Emerson, Artist, jaredemerson.com
Do you need rest? Peace? Freedom? Forgiveness? Restoration?
Call out to Jesus, accept Him as your Savior, and be made whole.
Pray: “Jesus, I invite You into my life. I confess that I am a sinner in
need of a Savior. Thank You for saving me from my sins and making
me whole. Thank You for laying down Your life for me so that I can
have a new life in You. I receive, by faith, this forgiveness of sin. Take
my life—my past and my future. Guide my steps and speak to my
heart, Lord. Use me, God. Amen.”
Let us know of your decision so we can help you grow in your faith.
Write to: VL Correspondence, PO Box 2751, Greenville, NC 27836.
PERHAPS AFTER READING the stories in this magazine, you’ve surrendered your life to
Jesus. Congratulations—it’s the most important decision you will ever make! But you might
be wondering, now what? Here are five ways to ensure spiritual growth. Remember, the
Christian life is a journey that brings lifelong transformation.
1. PRAY. Talk to God about everything and listen for His response. You don’t need
fancy words, just a sincere heart.
2. STUDY THE BIBLE. God’s Word contains all the instructions we need for life. Get
into a Bible study and discover new revelations daily. Free resources are on page 34.
3. GET BAPTIZED. Although baptism is not a requirement of salvation, the Bible
clearly tells us that we are to be water baptized after salvation. Baptism symbolizes
our dying to sin and being raised to a new life in Christ Jesus (Romans 6:4). Prison
restrictions may make immersion by water difficult, so get creative and let the Holy
Spirit reveal how you can take this step of obedience until immersion is possible.
4. FIND CHRISTIAN COMMUNITY. Join a local congregation of Christ-followers. If
incarceration makes attending church difficult, fellowship with other believers the
best you can. They will help you stand strong and keep you accountable.
5. TELL SOMEONE. Share your decision to follow Christ and tell them what He has
done for you. And then, tell us! We’d love to hear from you.
WHAT NOW?
I’ve Accepted God’s Salvation.
Now What?
VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM
Issue 04 / 2022
33

MINISTRY NEWS/RESOURCES
Victorious Living Prison
Outreach Update
podcasts, and VL Storytime. We also offer fellowship through
personal correspondence. Inmates can write to us at PO Box
2751, Greenville, NC 27836, or email us at hope@vlmag.org.
Because of the Lord, generous financial partners,
and digital opportunities on tablets, Victorious
Living continues to expand into new facilities
across America.
• Family members of our incarcerated family and our ministry
partners can also enjoy these free resources through
pandoapp.tv and VL’s online platforms like vlmag.org,
Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube.
• 53,000 hard copies of Victorious Living magazine are delivered
into over 2,700 correctional facilities in 41 states each quarter
through direct distribution and partnerships with organizations
like CLI-Prison Alliance and Prison Book Project.
• Inmates have digital access to Victorious Living on tablet
systems. By the end of the year, we anticipate our resources
being available in 80% of all facilities nationwide.
• In addition to VLMag, we offer inmates discipleship materials
on tablet systems through our MORE VL broadcasts, VL
• We regret that due to high transitional rates of inmates and
new correspondence restrictions, we are no longer able to
mail inmates individual subscriptions of VLMag. However,
bulk copies of VLMag are provided, with or without staples,
to prisons, jails, recovery, and reentry programs at no
charge. Chaplains and program directors can contact us at
352-478-2098 for these free resources.
• On September 15, Darryl Strawberry joined the VL team
for a “Night of Hope.” This special program is available
for viewing on both PANDO and EDOVO devices.
RESOURCES
Below are opportunities for free Christian-based
resources for both English- and Spanish-speaking
inmates and chaplains. When you contact the
addresses below, tell our partners VL referred you.
VICTORIOUS LIVING
Personal correspondence available in English and Spanish.
Bulk copies of VLMag are available for jail and prison libraries
at chaplain’s request.
PO Box 2751
Email: hope@vlmag.org
Greenville, NC 27836
2ND OPPORTUNITY
Reentry and employmentreadiness
programming;
job and housing referrals
for inmates in
jails and prisons
upon request.
PO Box 3411
Peachtree City, GA 30269
CLI PRISON ALLIANCE
Personal discipleship
studies by mail for inmates
in jails and prisons;
free Christian books and
Bibles for libraries at
request of chaplain or
authorized personnel.
PO Box 97095
Raleigh, NC 27624
RESCUED NOT ARRESTED
Free NIV Bibles, Bible study
correspondence course, and
NIV Life Application Study Bible
upon completion of study for
inmates in jails and prisons.
Call: 602-647-8325
PO Box 90606
Phoenix, AZ 85066
GLOBAL LEADERSHIP
SUMMIT
Bring world-class
leadership training
and tools to your facility
through the GL Summit
and GL Network. Write to
GlobalLeadership.org.
PO Box 3188
Barrington, IL 60011
34
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