VL - Issue 43- April 22
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STEPPING FORWARD<br />
HEALING FOR A<br />
WOUNDED SOUL<br />
BY LINDA CUBBEDGE-SMITH<br />
IN MY SECOND YEAR OF MARRIAGE,<br />
I experienced an unexpected storm that<br />
robbed me of my peace and joy. Tom and<br />
I had met in <strong>April</strong> 2018 and were married<br />
three months later. We’d each had long,<br />
beautiful marriages to our previous spouses<br />
before we lost them to sickness.<br />
We didn’t know each other very well<br />
yet, but we felt the Lord had brought us<br />
together. We quickly realized, however, that<br />
starting a second marriage as senior adults<br />
wasn’t as easy as we’d imagined.<br />
By late summer of 2020, Tom and I separated,<br />
and I moved back home.<br />
My heart was full of resentment<br />
and bitterness toward Tom, and<br />
I hated feeling these emotions.<br />
As a Christ-follower, I knew they<br />
weren’t what God desired for me. I repented<br />
repeatedly and tried not to allow them to<br />
control me again. But those layers of deep<br />
resentment mocked me.<br />
I was experiencing tremendous emotional<br />
pain. I was 69 years old and felt<br />
helpless. Thankfully, this dark season led<br />
me to draw close to my heavenly Father.<br />
He lovingly cared for me and assured me<br />
healing would come. Still, I longed to be<br />
free of this deep wound in my soul.<br />
During our separation, the Lord often<br />
prompted me to call Tom. I didn’t want to<br />
call him, though, as he might think I wanted<br />
to come back to him. Then I felt the Lord<br />
urging me to invite Tom over for dinner.<br />
“What?! Please, Lord, don’t ask me to do<br />
that!” But the Lord persisted.<br />
I finally humbled myself and reached<br />
out to Tom by text. I was hoping he would<br />
decline my invitation so I could be off the<br />
hook, but he didn’t. It wasn’t an easy evening<br />
for me. I had so much pride lurking<br />
in my heart.<br />
One day, I was unpacking some jewelry<br />
when I discovered that my gold herringbone<br />
necklace was a tangled mess. The<br />
links were twisted, and the chain felt like<br />
sharp edges of broken glass.<br />
I tried to remove the kinks by holding<br />
each end of the necklace and stretching<br />
it. It didn’t work. Then I tapped the kinked<br />
links on my dresser. To my shock, the necklace<br />
fell smoothly into place!<br />
“God, help me to forgive others<br />
as You have forgiven me.”<br />
I asked God about that necklace, and<br />
He showed me that, just as my chain had<br />
gotten twisted in the move, my soul was<br />
tangled too. And the kinks of my soul were<br />
sharp and rigid like the chain.<br />
I knew I needed to remain in faith and<br />
trust God’s Word so His Living Water<br />
could take me to a healthier place and<br />
untangle the deep hurt of my soul. I needed<br />
to replace my bitter thoughts with God’s<br />
promises so His healing power could work<br />
in my life.<br />
I made it a practice each morning to verbally<br />
clothe myself in God’s Word as I physically<br />
dressed. Often, I claimed the power<br />
of Colossians 3:12–14 as I prayed, “Lord,<br />
I am clothing myself with tender-hearted<br />
mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and<br />
patience. I choose to make allowance for<br />
Tom’s faults and forgive any offense as<br />
You have forgiven me. I will clothe myself<br />
with love and trust it to bind us together<br />
in harmony.”<br />
Soon, I saw evidence of God working out<br />
the kinks of our relationship. By the fall of<br />
2020, the Lord had reconciled our marriage.<br />
We didn’t have everything figured out, but<br />
we were committed to loving and respecting<br />
one another and letting God change<br />
us. Since then, we have enjoyed our life<br />
together, as the Lord had planned.<br />
Perhaps today, your situation seems<br />
hopeless. Call on the Lord Jesus before<br />
bitterness takes hold of you. Surrender<br />
your situation to God and permit<br />
Him to change you.<br />
The Holy Spirit will give you a<br />
teachable and humble heart as you<br />
devour God’s Word and speak His<br />
powerful promises into your life. Further,<br />
as you obey His kind leading, the Lord will<br />
bring healing to your soul and situation too.<br />
Pray with me: “Father, forgive me for<br />
any hidden offenses that are giving ground<br />
to the devil. Reveal them to me. Now, in<br />
the name of Jesus, I sever from my soul<br />
every menacing spirit of pride, unbelief,<br />
and stubbornness. I denounce the painful<br />
memories that are keeping me in bondage.<br />
I cut off any spirit of rejection and anger<br />
from their place of habitation in my soul.<br />
Instead, I choose to clothe myself with Your<br />
peace, tender-hearted mercy, kindness,<br />
love, and humility. God, help me to forgive<br />
others as You have forgiven me.”<br />
LINDA CUBBEDGE-SMITH was Victorious<br />
Living’s Prison Correspondence Outreach Director<br />
from 2014 until June of 2021. She is currently<br />
working on a book about the goodness of God and<br />
remains passionate about leading others to Him.<br />
8 <strong>Issue</strong> 02 / 20<strong>22</strong> VICTORIOUSLIVINGMAGAZINE.COM