Churchill vs Fitzwilliam - CUAFL Cuppers Final
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C U A F L C U P P E R S F I N A L<br />
CHURCHILL<br />
FITZWILLIAM<br />
FRIDAY 29 APRIL, 2022<br />
KICK-OFF 7.00PM<br />
CURUFC<br />
UNIVERSITY FOOTBALL GROUND<br />
GRANGE ROAD<br />
S O U V E N I R P R O G R A M M E
<strong>CUAFL</strong> CUPPERS FINAL<br />
CONGRATULATIONS!<br />
JESUS WOMEN’S TEAM<br />
Winning the Women’s <strong>Cuppers</strong> <strong>Final</strong>, 3-1 <strong>vs</strong> Newbroke.<br />
02 CHURCHILL V FITZWILLIAM
WELCOME:<br />
FROM THE CHAIRMAN<br />
The 2021/22 <strong>CUAFL</strong> season brings us back to Grange Road for<br />
the <strong>Cuppers</strong> final for the first time since 2019.<br />
Having missed a couple of seasons<br />
worth of football due to covid this<br />
season has brought back something<br />
closer to normality, and it has been<br />
amazing to see all the college football<br />
teams out in force one more. Playing<br />
in <strong>Cuppers</strong> final, under the floodlights,<br />
in front of a crowd, for your college is<br />
the pinnacle of college football here<br />
in Cambridge and will live long in the<br />
memories for everyone involved.<br />
<strong>Cuppers</strong> final is always a tasty affair<br />
and this year will be no different as<br />
<strong>Churchill</strong> take on current holders<br />
<strong>Fitzwilliam</strong>. Both teams shared the<br />
Division 1 title in the 2018/19 season<br />
(which was cut short due to the<br />
pandemic) and have been strong<br />
footballing outfits ever since. Looking<br />
for <strong>Cuppers</strong> glory for an incredible<br />
sixth year running, <strong>Fitzwilliam</strong> are<br />
the bookies favourites and feature<br />
some of the best individual players<br />
the university has to offer. <strong>Churchill</strong><br />
on the other hand, having never won<br />
the competition, are looking to make<br />
history and seem to have really found<br />
“CUPPERS FINAL IS ALWAYS<br />
A TASTY AFFAIR AND<br />
THIS YEAR WILL BE NO<br />
DIFFERENT AS CHURCHILL<br />
TAKE ON CURRENT HOLDERS<br />
FITZWILLIAM”<br />
form over recent months, failing to<br />
win only twice since December.<br />
A mention has to go out to all the<br />
college captains, college ground<br />
staff and <strong>CUAFL</strong> referees, without<br />
whom weekly football fixtures in<br />
the university would simply not be<br />
possible.<br />
<strong>Final</strong>ly, I would like to thank CURUFC<br />
for preparing the pitch and opening<br />
the bar for this memorable occasion.<br />
Now it’s time to meet the teams…<br />
Sam Ernest<br />
<strong>CUAFL</strong> CHAIRMAN 2021/22<br />
CHURCHILL V FITZWILLIAM 03
<strong>CUAFL</strong> CUPPERS FINAL<br />
CHURCHILL:<br />
CAPTAIN’S SUMMARY<br />
This season, the mighty pinks took on a new form, having been in<br />
hibernation most of last year due to covid, as well as some big-name<br />
departures from two seasons past, such as Furlong, Burdock, McCabe and<br />
the like. I think it would be fair to say that our results this season have been<br />
more up and down then ever before, but when we’ve been good we have<br />
been really good.<br />
We started the season with an influx of new,<br />
eager freshers looking to impress. This is<br />
where we discovered some real talent in the<br />
likes of O’Neill, Perrin, Lofts and more recently<br />
Isaksen and Haber. To say we didn’t get off to<br />
a flying start this campaign would be a gross<br />
understatement. A 2-1 loss to Downing on the<br />
opening day gifting them their only league<br />
win of the season, we didn’t seem to get into<br />
rhythm and were clearly struggling for fitness.<br />
In light of this surprising and disappointing start,<br />
we knew things could only go up, especially<br />
given the quality we knew we possessed manfor-man.<br />
Old timer Ed Wicken stepped up to<br />
the plate the week after with a customary brace<br />
as we sunk recent rivals Queens’ 3-0.<br />
With O’Neill dictating the midfield and a solid<br />
clean sheet from a new founded back four it<br />
was definitely “much more like it”.<br />
Letting a first half two goal lead slip against<br />
Caius the week after definitely felt like two<br />
points dropped as we posted our first (and<br />
only) draw of the season (2-2). The poor results<br />
followed still, with our 3-0 loss <strong>vs</strong> today’s<br />
opponents registering as our heaviest defeat<br />
of the season. Our final game before Christmas<br />
saw us face Queens’ again, but this time in the<br />
cup. Confident on the ball and deadly in attack,<br />
we prevailed as 4-2 victors with all of our front<br />
three getting on the scoresheet.<br />
After the Christmas break and an unjust 3-2<br />
defeat to John’s we were in a precarious<br />
situation in the league. We knew we had to<br />
despatch Robinson to avoid real relegation<br />
threat, and boy did we ever. Apparently all it<br />
took was an embarrassingly lacklustre warmup<br />
followed by stern words from the senior<br />
figureheads and <strong>Churchill</strong> turned into a slick,<br />
well drilled football powerhouse. Pinpoint<br />
crosses, bullet headers and resolute defending<br />
gave the pinks a comfortable 4-0 win with the<br />
icing on the cake being Wicken’s 25-yard chip<br />
to round off an unforgettable hattrick.<br />
This win sparked a blistering run of form. Having<br />
smashed Sidney 5-1 in <strong>Cuppers</strong> quarter-final<br />
(see Joseph Helm’s set-piece hattrick), Corpus<br />
awaited us in our big semi-final in the pissing<br />
rain, with a chance to reach our first final since<br />
2007. Our 3-2 win, featuring a wonder goal<br />
from our twinkle-toed Portuguese maestro, Mr<br />
Rodrigues, sent the crowd into raptures.<br />
Subsequent wins in the league <strong>vs</strong> Corpus (2-0)<br />
and high flying Pembroke (3-2) earned us a top<br />
four finish and land us in great stead for Friday’s<br />
epic <strong>vs</strong> the reigning champions. We may be<br />
underdogs but if we play like we have in spells<br />
this season, we can beat anyone.<br />
Sagar Agrawal<br />
TEAM CAPTAIN<br />
04 CHURCHILL V FITZWILLIAM
CHURCHILL:<br />
PLAYER PROFILES<br />
SAGAR AGRAWAL: He is our formidable egg-shaped figure in goal and inspiring<br />
leader off it. His love of the game and joy in victory cannot be overstated<br />
- whilst most players might settle for a handshake and the pub after a win,<br />
Sagar’s post-match celebrations go a little further. Apparently he even ended<br />
up in Broadmoor after our electric semi-final victory against corpus, such is his<br />
passion for the game.<br />
DAN LOFTS: The Rory Delap of college football, Dan Fenwick-Lofts can throw a<br />
football so far it has to quarantine for 14 days after landing. He has been a core<br />
member of <strong>Churchill</strong>’s team this season and has been a rock in defence, skilled<br />
both in the air and on the ground. As the team’s new social sec, Dan is already<br />
preparing the celebrations for when the mighty pinks bring it home.<br />
SAM ERNEST: An old-school centre-half, Sam is a staunch Stoke City supporter<br />
and such loyalties are manifest in his prosaic style of play: heavily influenced<br />
by the Pulisball of the late 2000s, Sam is actively opposed to the notion of the<br />
modern day defender and has long since employed the long ball as his primary<br />
modus operandi. He is, however, a bona fide legend of CCFC, the owner of<br />
back-to-back Players’ Player of the Season awards, and a man whose absence will<br />
be sorely felt following his imminent departure from the club.<br />
ALEX PERRIN: To describe Alex, imagine if TAA could actually defend. Your<br />
favourite player’s favourite player, you’ll often see him bombing down the right<br />
flank and pinging pinpoint crosses into the box. At the other end, he’s pocketed<br />
some of the very best <strong>CUAFL</strong> has to offer. Calm and collected on the ball, there<br />
were unconfirmed reports that he washes down his Weetabix with a chilli each<br />
morning following his performance at the club dinner.<br />
ED STEVENSON: From the heights of QPR U8 academy, this lad knew he had talent since<br />
day one. A broken leg later led him to study physics at Cambridge, since what else was there<br />
to do? Overlooked as a fresher, no one quite knew the quality he had locked away, despite<br />
coming on and scoring a worldie on debut from 35 yards out. Fast forward 2021, a new<br />
captain identifies untapped potential. Since then, he’s been at left back. He’s put in a few<br />
decent performances along the way too. Potentially the most underrated baller in CCFC, his<br />
twinkle toes as he beats 1, maybe 2 attackers is sure to be something to look out for.<br />
CHURCHILL V FITZWILLIAM 05
<strong>CUAFL</strong> CUPPERS FINAL<br />
OSA ILUOBE: Upon passing one’s eye over Osaramen’s Linkedin, you may be<br />
forgiven for asking: how does he have time for football? He doesn’t - ‘sporadic’<br />
doesn’t do justice to the difficulties pinning him down this season. There’s a reason<br />
we keep going back to the 2nd toughest HSPSer, and you’ll understand too when<br />
that first crunching challenge goes in on Fitz’s midfield.<br />
CONOR O’NEILL: As calm on the pitch as he is off of it, Conor will rock up in his<br />
all black ensemble each weekend ready to compose an exquisite game from<br />
the centre of the park. Pulling up with cramp mid-way through the second half<br />
is almost a given with Conor, as are his MOTM performances he often acquires<br />
due to his goals, assists and all around play-making.<br />
JOSEPH HELM: A man from the depths of southwest London, Josephus<br />
Helmzino. Sleek in the streets, sleeker on the pitch, he’ll bring the heat.<br />
Standard. The Kingston Modric is what they call him. With good reason. He can’t<br />
wait for the chance to snap Sonny Mcph*rson and is ready to carry the weight of<br />
<strong>Churchill</strong> with him as he eyes his first <strong>Cuppers</strong> trophy.<br />
JOCELINO RODRIGUES: Joc is the CAM/ RW of the first team and he reminds<br />
me of Philippe Coutinho with his dribbling ability past players. Highlight of the<br />
season has to be his wonder strike in the semis to bring <strong>Churchill</strong> to their first<br />
final in a decade. An integral part to the team with the twinkle-toes to embarrass<br />
even the sharpest of defenders, he is a multi-talented individual who steals the<br />
hearts of many with his guitar - let’s hope everyone is playing to the same tune<br />
come Friday 29th.<br />
PHIL DILLON: Philip Dillon is <strong>Churchill</strong>’s part-time dining hall manager, part-time<br />
semi-professional footballer. Better known as Philly D, he is an unassuming veteran<br />
who sprints down the wings and craves for the ball, always willing to take on<br />
crunching challenges. He paces around the pitch with a can-do attitude, while at<br />
the same time energising the team with a multitude of Sunday football clichés. He<br />
is a popular character among the squad owing to his humble nature – but this is a<br />
red herring, as tonight, Fitz should watch out for this footballing grandmaster.<br />
06 CHURCHILL V FITZWILLIAM
ED WICKEN: Modelled off prime Troy Deeney (with more pace and less<br />
strength), our number 9 certainly has what the pundits call “a footballer’s brain”.<br />
Where the mighty pinks would be without the ex-skipper’s goals this season no<br />
one really knows but 10 goals and 5 assists this campaign speaks for itself. With<br />
cup history <strong>vs</strong> Fitz back in 2018, where he netted a spectacular first half hattrick,<br />
“Pacey Ed” will be hoping to roll back the years when he steps onto the hallowed<br />
Grange Road turf.<br />
ANDREAS ECONOMOU: This <strong>Churchill</strong>ian stud will be bringing his Cypriot (not<br />
Greek) enhanced physique to breakdown a tough Fitz team. His tardiness is well<br />
known around campus. As such, he might be late to the game, however, when this<br />
defensive gladiator eventually arrives, it’s <strong>Churchill</strong>’s final to win. Rest assured that<br />
with his Messi-like dribbling, girthy quads, and long basketball shorts, he will be flying<br />
past defenders in nonchalant fashion. Our hometown Adonis has the confidence of a<br />
Hollywood A-lister and tonight he will be slapping the confidence out of Fitz’s players.<br />
ARAN HABER: Marcus McCabe, Athi Chellappa, Callum Farrow; all CCFC legends<br />
who have torn it to shreds in the 2s and risen to become 1st team stalwarts. You<br />
can bet good money on Aran Haber joining that iconic list. After making his first<br />
team debut a couple of weeks into Lent term Aran has become a regular starter<br />
thanks to his technical prowess. With the versatility of James Milner, whether it<br />
be as a rock in midfield or a menace out wide Aran makes football look easy and<br />
is itching to show Fitz how the beautiful game is played.<br />
TOM BURKE: He may be <strong>Churchill</strong>’s very own Roger Federer but he is also<br />
pretty handy at football. After winning the award for worst fitness-to-ability ratio<br />
at the CCFC dinner, it is no surprise he impacts the game most as our super<br />
sub. Nevertheless when he starts, his technical prowess is apparent. He is Mr.<br />
Consistent when it comes to availability, rain or shine, he’s on time, and there is<br />
no doubt that he will turn up when it matters most: in this year’s <strong>Cuppers</strong> final.<br />
PETER ISAKSEN: A short investigation: Could Peter be the next coming of Jesus?<br />
Similarities: Top tier hairstyle, great cross, magic (*source needed), nailed on to<br />
be a good performer (unless downing beer).<br />
Differences: Jesus won’t be in the cuppers final this year/<br />
Conclusion: Not enough evidence... But this winger definitely has a wand of a<br />
left foot.<br />
MICHAEL GRIFFITHS: Balding, banging and blasting balls since the age of 12,<br />
Michael ‘the Gruffalo’ Griffiths is no stranger to the beautiful game. Luckily for<br />
the opposition, he only comes on past the 80-minute mark. With his lightning<br />
pace and cruise liner acceleration, defending him is only met with trembling<br />
confusion. His touch is something Berbatov could only dream of, controlling the<br />
ball with his huge and mighty ass, thanks to his strict beef & onions diet, striking<br />
fear into the manhoods of left-backs (they never stood a chance). The biggest<br />
man to put on a 2003-4 Arsenal kit, this man truly is invincible.<br />
CHURCHILL V FITZWILLIAM 07
<strong>CUAFL</strong> CUPPERS FINAL<br />
1ST ROUND 2ND ROUND QUARTE<br />
BYE<br />
CHURCHILL<br />
QUEENS<br />
GIRTON<br />
CLARE<br />
PETERHOUSE<br />
SIDNEY SUSSEX<br />
BYE<br />
BYE<br />
DARWIN<br />
SELWYN<br />
ST CATHERINE’S<br />
PEMBROKE<br />
CHRIST’S<br />
CORPUS CHRISTI<br />
BYE<br />
BYE<br />
GONVILLE & CAIUS<br />
TRINITY HALL<br />
EMMA<br />
HOMERTON<br />
DOWNING<br />
FITZWILLIAM<br />
BYE<br />
BYE<br />
ST JOHNS<br />
KING’S<br />
ROBINSON<br />
MAGDELENE<br />
LUCY CAVENDISH<br />
TRINITY<br />
JESUS<br />
CHURCHILL<br />
QUEENS<br />
CLARE<br />
SIDNEY SUSSEX<br />
DARWIN<br />
ST CATHERINE’S<br />
PEMBROKE<br />
CORPUS CHRISTI<br />
GONVILLE & CAIUS<br />
TRINITY HALL<br />
HOMERTON<br />
FITZWILLIAM<br />
ST JOHNS<br />
KING’S<br />
LUCY CAVENDISH<br />
JESUS<br />
CHUR<br />
SIDNEY<br />
ST CATH<br />
CORPUS<br />
GONVILLE<br />
FITZWI<br />
KIN<br />
JES<br />
08 CHURCHILL V FITZWILLIAM
R-FINAL SEMI-FINAL FINAL<br />
CHILL<br />
SUSSEX<br />
CHURCHILL<br />
CORPUS CHRISTI<br />
ERINE’S<br />
CHRISTI<br />
CHURCHILL<br />
FITZWILLAM<br />
& CAIUS<br />
LLIAM<br />
FITZWILLIAM<br />
JESUS<br />
G’S<br />
US<br />
CHURCHILL V FITZWILLIAM 09
<strong>CUAFL</strong> CUPPERS FINAL<br />
FITZWILLIAM:<br />
CAPTAIN’S SUMMARY<br />
Following a year with no league but a successful cuppers campaign, the<br />
expectations set for Fitz football were very present coming into this season.<br />
And, given that we were losing 7 players who started the cuppers final last<br />
year, the sense was that other teams felt this was their chance to put a stop<br />
to Fitz’s recent success.<br />
Our start to the season quickly evaporated<br />
such doubts, with new players like Josh Douglas<br />
and Harry Houillon quickly establishing their<br />
quality within the team - Harry - and freshers<br />
George Smith and Codrin Moisoi playing like<br />
they’d been part of the side for years. The ease<br />
with which the new side clicked helped us to<br />
three league wins in our first 3 games, scoring<br />
19 and conceding only 4. The cuppers game <strong>vs</strong><br />
Homerton was seen as the first real test. The<br />
number of fans who travelled to the far side of<br />
Cambridge to support us not only helped us to<br />
a comfortable win, but further cemented the<br />
strength of the sporting and social community<br />
at Fitz, and how important that was to the<br />
continued success of Fitz sport - which the<br />
team is sure we will see again at the final.<br />
The Christmas holiday actually came at a bad<br />
time for us, having picked up momentum<br />
towards the end of term with centre-backs<br />
Cavan Farrow and Thomas Willock putting in a<br />
nearly flawless performance in the game against<br />
Homerton, and Gareth Effiom having a real<br />
impact off the bench. Despite this, a Lumi hattrick<br />
against our league competitors Pembroke<br />
seemed to signal that all was normal and we had<br />
picked up where we left off (basically meaning<br />
we were still reliant on Lumi magic), giving<br />
us a comfortable cushion in the league table<br />
and a match against struggling Queens. The<br />
Queens game was, however, a well-deserved<br />
slap back to reality: our belief that teams would<br />
simply lie down in the face of our previous<br />
years’ success was dispelled by the 5-2 defeat.<br />
Yet, even though we have a young side (Ben<br />
Shires notwithstanding), the experience and<br />
leadership of our university players - Cass<br />
Ashworth, Olamide Ogunnaike, Jed Odagbu,<br />
and Lumi Kanwei - ensured that we took this<br />
loss as an opportunity to learn. That we did,<br />
going into our cuppers game against Caius,<br />
and following league game against John’s, with<br />
renewed energy and creativity (see Harry’s<br />
scorpion kick for reference) reflected in the 6-3<br />
and 4-1 wins.<br />
Our semi-final win against Jesus once again<br />
reflected just how important the support of Fitz<br />
students - not to undersell the importance of<br />
Josh’s raw pace and Simon King’s shot-stopping<br />
ability against the Blues’ top scorer - is to the<br />
side, with the 0-0 draw at half-time giving<br />
way to a 3-1 victory as more people came to<br />
watch in the drizzling rain. We are now looking<br />
forward to the final, and are sure that we will<br />
take <strong>Churchill</strong> as seriously as a team of their<br />
genuine quality and togetherness deserves,<br />
having given us a real test in the league. Either<br />
way, good luck to them and we’re sure it’ll be a<br />
quality game and great experience all around.<br />
Tom Randall<br />
TEAM CAPTAIN<br />
10 CHURCHILL V FITZWILLIAM
FITZWILLIAM:<br />
PLAYER PROFILES<br />
SIMON: Despite winning the shield with <strong>Fitzwilliam</strong> IIs, Simon wanted more out of<br />
football at Fitz. When it looked like the first team stood a chance of winning some<br />
silverware, Simon decided he would start playing for the team. A game winning save<br />
against Pembroke and a quality performance in the semi-finals justified his inclusion<br />
to the squad, and he’s looking to add the Cup to his trophy cabinet today. Expect<br />
some reflex saves and a few dodgy passes to make sure the Fitz defence are on their<br />
toes.<br />
GEORGE: Enthusiastic, dominant, shirtless. No three words better encapsulate<br />
George Smith. Despite a tendency to prance around the pitch like Bambi on ice,<br />
George strikes fear into the heart of every striker. Known for his defensive prowess,<br />
George singlehandedly ensured a clean sheet last time out against <strong>Churchill</strong> by<br />
playing like a brick-wall for an hour and then dead for a few minutes. <strong>Fitzwilliam</strong>’s very<br />
own Aldi-brand Haaland is a force to be reckoned with, and <strong>Churchill</strong> would do well<br />
to remember this.<br />
CODRIN: The Romanian Delicacy. Codrin is a hard worker on and off the pitch, if he<br />
isn’t enjoying locking up your team’s best player you can find him on the top floor<br />
of the Olisa. He is a rock in the <strong>Fitzwilliam</strong> defence responsible for many crunching<br />
challenges. On top of that Codrin has the finishing ability of any top striker even if<br />
he only utilises it when facing his own goal. A true <strong>Fitzwilliam</strong> athlete, Codrin will be<br />
hoping this is one of many finals where he can show off his elite game.<br />
JOSH: Introducing Josh Douglas, our no-nonsense CB turned premier gloveman. He<br />
will be putting on hold his extremely strenuous English degree and will instead turn<br />
his attention to protecting the Fitz goal. Despite his affinity for shots in Re<strong>vs</strong>, he will be<br />
rejecting shots at Grange Road as he denies <strong>Churchill</strong>’s efforts. He is recommended not to<br />
take on the goal posts, having come off second best in his last encounter. Known for his<br />
size, strength, and height, Josh is a true servant of Fitz Sport, representing the college in<br />
many sports at a high level. As long as his luscious locks do not obscure his vision, Douglas<br />
will be an invaluable asset for Fitz, with high quality distribution and shot stopping ability.<br />
LUMI: Death, Taxes and Lumi scoring a goal per game has quickly become the trinity<br />
of certainties in life. Lumi’s matriculation in 2019 marked the death knell to all other<br />
college sides. He arrived in Cambridge not just to take part in college football but to<br />
take over. The marauding forward has amassed a goal tally that can only be replicated<br />
on beginners mode on FIFA. Not just content with being a remarkable goal scorer his<br />
work rate, strength and passing ability make him one of the most complete forwards<br />
Cambridge has ever seen. If there is one player that is sure to decide the final, you<br />
can bet your inflated mortgage that it will be Lumi.<br />
CHURCHILL V FITZWILLIAM 11
<strong>CUAFL</strong> CUPPERS FINAL<br />
HARRY: Introducing Harry Houillon: latest exponent of Fitz Factory, and possibly the<br />
most depressingly versatile human being you will ever meet. Has taken a break from<br />
hitting a ball around a field, and has donned the famous maroon in order to chase<br />
balls instead. Part Diego Jota, part Joe Root, the only thing filthier than his scorpion<br />
kick goal against St. John’s is his termly EPOS bill. So eminently likeable that, by full<br />
time, he will end up better friends with the opposition back line than with his actual<br />
mates.<br />
CAVAN: An inspiring story of how a complete lack of footballing ability is no obstacle<br />
to representing your college, however, what he lacks in skill he makes up for in sheer<br />
aggression. No man is more dedicated to Fitz sport, having suffered two concussions<br />
in the process of representing his college in too many sports to mention: his playing<br />
style for all can be described in one word: agricultural. Expect plenty of needless<br />
two-footed tackles.<br />
SHIRES: The most decorated college football player in Cambridge University history,<br />
presumably. Legend says Ben Shires and <strong>Fitzwilliam</strong> College rose out of the ground<br />
together but sadly Ben’s 312-year reign at Fitz is nearing its end. Will the college be<br />
able to exist without him or will Fitz simply crumble to dust when he leaves? No one<br />
knows for sure. What is certain though is that Ben Shires would love to cap off his<br />
illustrious Fitz career with a 5th <strong>Cuppers</strong> trophy and cement his legacy as one of the<br />
greats.<br />
WILLOCK: It may be his first season for <strong>Fitzwilliam</strong> but what a debut it has been.<br />
Rising up to the 1s after dominating down the wing in the 2s Thomas has thoroughly<br />
earned his place. Thomas never seems to be satisfied with the quality of football on<br />
show no matter the result, so hopefully a debut cuppers win could be enough to<br />
keep him happy for a while. Overall, he’s a rock at the back and while he’s only been<br />
with <strong>Fitzwilliam</strong> a year he’s bled maroon all his life.<br />
CASS: The latest product of the Fitz footballing factory, Cass has been pivotal to<br />
<strong>Fitzwilliam</strong>’s success thus far. The class Cass oozes on the pitch extends off it, surely<br />
being one of the only people that can execute an effortless backflip four pints deep.<br />
Despite his infectious smile and friendly nature off-pitch, he doesn’t play like that on<br />
it. You’ll catch Cass today flying into tackles and not backing out of any fifty-fifties and<br />
we can only pray for the wellbeing of Joe Helm’s legs (although a mild breeze would be<br />
enough to snap them) after today. Coming off the back of his outstanding Varsity win<br />
and performance, Cass will be full of confidence and ready to play <strong>Churchill</strong> off the park.<br />
12 CHURCHILL V FITZWILLIAM
GAZ: The only person in history to have been scouted for a rugby team based<br />
purely on the size of his legs, Gaz has informed us that, legally, we must recommend<br />
<strong>Churchill</strong>’s defenders don’t challenge him to a 50/50. Gaining his first start for<br />
<strong>Fitzwilliam</strong> 1s this season, Gaz quickly set about prosecuting opposition full-backs,<br />
with his blistering acceleration and change of direction badgering defendants weekly.<br />
Overrule, <strong>Churchill</strong>’s best chance of stopping Gaz is hoping he simply doesn’t show<br />
up, which isn’t impossible given his record towards the end of Lent Term.<br />
OLA: The most laid-back player this side of the Cam, Ola breezes past players with ease<br />
from both left-back and right-wing. Having starred for all three university teams, winning<br />
both a BUCS league and Varsity, and never using his right-foot once, a second <strong>Cuppers</strong><br />
win would undoubtedly be the highlight of his season, although hardly a surprise. The<br />
only man to prefer a sidebar to a bar, as long as he puts down his books for the full 90<br />
minutes he’s guaranteed to give the crowd a show and the left-back a nightmare: cutting<br />
in on his left-foot and shooting, passing, or dribbling, Ola just makes football look so easy.<br />
SONNY: Questionable hairstyles and a complete lack of consciousness most nights<br />
are defining features of Sonny’s <strong>Fitzwilliam</strong> career. Nobody quite knows what goes<br />
on in his mind (will he have dyed his hair a Fitz pigeon-grey for the final?), but Sonny<br />
is somehow always ready to play a full 90 after his nightly encounter with the Lola’s<br />
floor. With more passion than George Smith could throw and talent to match, one<br />
thing is for certain: <strong>Churchill</strong> will have a hard time containing the charismatic Fitz<br />
captain. Has been known to pull a mean knee slide.<br />
RANDALL: T Rands wasn’t the captain we asked for or needed. But perhaps his<br />
predecessors knew something we didn’t, as the Rolls Royce midfielder has co-led the<br />
side to the brink of more Fitz success. This dead ball specialist with silky feet and the<br />
work-rate of a Fitz gardener has instead been a constant source of strength for the team.<br />
Still, how do you capture the essence of his footballing ability? How do you describe<br />
the indescribable? As a philosophy student, perhaps only TR7 can answer that, and, as a<br />
philosophy student, we’re all hoping he can be more useful on the pitch than he is off it.<br />
JED: Jed Odagbu has the skills of Neymar, the work-rate of Benzema, the playmaking<br />
ability of De Bruyne, the touch of Ronaldinho and the finishing, or lack thereof, of<br />
Bruno Fernandes. Jed has been leaving defenders trembling, cowering, as he’s lit up<br />
the college and Uni football scene for the last three years and scored probably the<br />
goal of the season for the Falcs this year (think Shearer <strong>vs</strong> Everton but slower and<br />
not first-time and <strong>vs</strong> Nottingham IVs). I once heard a defender plead with God for<br />
assistance as Jed brushed past him for the hundredth time. <strong>Churchill</strong> College will be<br />
no different.<br />
CHURCHILL V FITZWILLIAM 13
<strong>CUAFL</strong> CUPPERS FINAL<br />
<strong>CUAFL</strong><br />
LEAGUE TABLE:<br />
HOME AWAY OVERALL<br />
# TEAM P W D L F A W D L F A W D L F A GD PTS<br />
1 FITZWILLIAM I 8 3 1 0 11 4 3 0 1 22 8 6 1 1 33 12 21 19<br />
2 PEMBROKE I 8 4 0 0 11 3 1 1 2 10 7 5 1 2 21 10 11 16<br />
3 HOMERTON I 8 3 1 0 20 6 1 0 3 6 11 4 1 3 26 17 9 13<br />
4 CHURCHILL I 9 2 1 2 11 10 2 0 2 7 5 4 1 4 18 15 3 13<br />
5 QUEENS I 9 3 0 1 18 13 1 0 4 13 17 4 0 5 31 30 1 12<br />
6 GONVILLE & CAIUS I 9 3 0 1 16 10 0 3 2 9 14 3 3 3 25 24 1 12<br />
7 ST JOHNS I 9 2 0 3 10 16 1 2 1 5 5 3 2 4 15 21 -6 11<br />
8 ROBINSON I 8 2 1 2 12 17 1 0 2 14 14 3 1 4 26 31 -5 10<br />
9 CORPUS CHRISTI 8 1 1 1 8 6 2 0 3 12 23 3 1 4 20 29 -9 10<br />
10 DOWNING I 8 1 1 2 6 18 0 0 4 5 19 1 1 6 11 37 -26 4<br />
RECENT FORM:<br />
CHURCHILL<br />
FITZWILLIAM<br />
CHURCHILL 2-3 ST JOHNS<br />
ROBINSON 0-4 CHURCHILL<br />
CORPUS CHRISTI 0-2 CHURCHILL<br />
CHURCHILL 1-3 HOMERTON<br />
CHURCHILL 3-2 PEMBROKE<br />
FITZWILLIAM 3-0 CHURCHILL<br />
FITZWILLIAM 3-2 PERMBROKE<br />
QUEENS 5-2 FITZWILLIAM<br />
ST JOHNS 1-4 FITZWILLIAM<br />
FITZWILLIAM 0-0 GONVILLE & CAIUS<br />
14 CHURCHILL V FITZWILLIAM
THE PAST 10 YEARS<br />
WINNERS:<br />
2011-12 FITZWILLIAM<br />
2012-13 FITZWILLIAM<br />
2013-14 JESUS<br />
2014-15 ST JOHN’S<br />
2015-16 ROBINSON<br />
2016-17 FITZWILLIAM<br />
2017-18 FITZWILLIAM<br />
2018-19 FITZWILLIAM<br />
2019-20 FITZWILLIAM & QUEENS *<br />
2020-21 FITZWILLIAM<br />
*(SHARED DUE TO COVID)<br />
CHURCHILL V FITZWILLIAM 15
CHURCHILL<br />
(GK)<br />
SAGAR AGRAWAL<br />
DAN LOFTS<br />
SAM ERNEST<br />
ALEX PERRIN<br />
ED STEVENSON<br />
OSA ILUOBE<br />
CONOR O’NEILL<br />
JOSEPH HELM<br />
JOCELINO RODRIGUES<br />
PHIL DILLON<br />
ED WICKEN<br />
ANDREAS ECONOMOU<br />
ARAN HABER<br />
TOM BURKE<br />
PETER ISAKSEN<br />
MICHAEL GRIFFITHS<br />
FITZWILLIAM<br />
SIMON KING (GK)<br />
GEORGE SMITH<br />
CODRIN MOISOI<br />
JOSH DOUGLAS<br />
LUMI KANWEI<br />
HARRY HOUILLON<br />
CAVAN FARROW<br />
BEN SHIRES<br />
THOMAS WILLOCK<br />
CASS ASHWORTH<br />
GARETH EFFIOM<br />
OLAMIDE OGUNNAIKE<br />
SONNY MCPHERSON<br />
TOM RANDALL<br />
JED ODAGBU<br />
REFEREE<br />
ALEX EATON<br />
ASSISTANT REFEREE<br />
CHRIS HUSSEY<br />
ASSISTANT REFEREE<br />
MATT HASLETT<br />
FOURTH OFFICIAL<br />
TOBY BARNETT