24 Seven February 2022

hostage, but held my family prisoner as well.” This
insidious disease can challenge and often ruin
even the strongest of families. Addiction affects
the family emotionally, financially, and even
medically and legally. My son’s addiction, like so
many others, caused strain and conflict in our
family. My daughters and I disagreed constantly
about this and it led to heated discussions. I always
defended him saying he was under the care of a
doctor and taking a prescribed drug, which he
was. I think my daughters saw the problem before
I did. We argued about the money I was spending
on him. The close relationship we always had was
tested constantly by our disagreements over their
brother. The closeness they all had as siblings
began to unravel as soon as the abuse began. It
is only now, over 20 years later, they are getting
back to the close relationship they once had.
On turning the corner:
This is an interesting topic because when
my son first when to rehab and returned
home, I knew there was still a lot of work to
be done. I knew we were on the right path and
I was determined to have him stay clean. But a
recovering addict is always that – recovering - and
is never fully healed. They are always fighting it.
Every family of an addict needs to know this. Part
of my brain told me he was “cured” the first time
out of rehab. I had a lot to learn. Every parent of
an addict needs to arm themselves with as much
information about the recovery process as they
can. It is a lifelong process.
On helping loved ones through addiction:
A recovering addict needs support and love
every day to keep them on that path. The family
needs support groups as well as the one suffering
from addiction in order to not only help their
loved one, but to help themselves. The most
important part for me was to never to give up.
Even though there were numerous setbacks and
multiple rehabs, I never stopped losing hope that
he would find his way. His recovery was a result
of love and support by his family, his girlfriend,
friends, and by the Recovery Center of America
program he was in, which constantly monitored
his actions.
On publicly disclosing her son’s addiction:
One of the first questions I get from people
when I tell them the topic of my book is, “Is he
okay with you talking about this?” This is best
addressed by his post. On the date of the book’s
From The Story
“Drug
addiction is
a progressive
problem and
the longer
one goes
without help,
the stronger
the addiction
becomes.”
publication, August 20, he posted a lengthy
statement on Facebook, which started:
“If there was ever was a “good day” to publicly
disclose for the first time, a personal part of
oneself by identifying as an addict in recovery,
today would be it. I am an addict in recovery. The
first time I ever said those words was March 7,
2011.” He goes on.” I am not embarrassed nor am
I ashamed about what has been written. Instead
I am grateful. I am grateful to have made close
friendships with those also in recovery. I am
grateful for a career where each day I show up
to work I see firsthand, what the depravity of the
disease looks like. I am grateful to have had the
chance to live another day. I am grateful for the
chance to help others. I am grateful simply for the
fact I have learned to be grateful. I am also grateful
for my mother.”
He now has a career that he loves, as an intake
nurse in a rehab facility, where he faces the reality
everyday of addiction and the effects on the
families.
On why she wrote the book:
I put our story out there so others could see
they are not alone. Many have told me they could
relate to so many incidents and had experienced
the same struggles. Our journey is not unlike
others. I have found in talking with people there is
hardly anyone who has not been touched in some
way by addiction. When I wrote our story, I was
seeking answers as to what I had missed and if I
was somehow responsible for his demise. My son
viewed it as a healing process for me, which indeed
it became. Once it was finished and he read it, he
agreed that our story may help other families.
One of my favorite Amazon reviews is: “If you
have a family member with addiction, this may
help you, you are not crazy.”
On offering hope:
My message in Wake Up Mom, is don’t give
up. My hope is that our story of chaos and
determination will inspire others and encourage
them to be the much needed support their loved
ones need. The addict cannot do it alone. The
family needs to be part of the process of recovery.
Part of my recovery as a mother was writing. I
encourage all parents or loved ones of an addict, to
at least speak their voice, share their experiences
and not to let it consume you. It can only help you
in the healing process.
To learn more visit: www.lindaleehenderson.com