Emotional inteligence
420/661These sensitive children are at high risk for developingan anxiety disorder such as panic attacks, starting asearly as sixth or seventh grade. In one study of 754 boysand girls in those grades, 44 were found to have alreadysuffered at least one episode of panic, or to have hadseveral preliminary symptoms. These anxiety episodeswere usually triggered by the ordinary alarms of earlyadolescence, such as a first date or a big exam—alarmsthat most children handle without developing more seriousproblems. But teenagers who were timid by temperamentand who had been unusually frightened bynew situations got panic symptoms such as heart palpitations,shortness of breath, or a choking feeling, alongwith the feeling that something horrible was going tohappen to them, like going crazy or dying. The researchersbelieve that while the episodes were not significantenough to rate the psychiatric diagnosis "panic disorder,"they signal that these teenagers would be atgreater risk for developing the disorder as the yearswent on; many adults who suffer panic attacks say theattacks began during their teen years. 5The onset of the anxiety attacks was closely tied to puberty.Girls with few signs of puberty reported no suchattacks, but of those who had gone through pubertyabout 8 percent said they had experienced panic. Oncethey have had such an attack, they are prone to
developing the dread of a recurrence that leads peoplewith panic disorder to shrink from life.NOTHING BOTHERS ME: THECHEERFUL TEMPERAMENT421/661In the 1920s, as a young woman, my aunt June left herhome in Kansas City and ventured on her own to Shanghai—adangerous journey for a solitary woman in thoseyears. There June met and married a British detective inthe colonial police force of that international center ofcommerce and intrigue. When the Japanese capturedShanghai at the outset of World War II, my aunt and herhusband were interned in the prison camp depicted inthe book and movie Empire of the Sun. After survivingfive horrific years in the prison camp, she and her husbandhad, literally, lost everything. Penniless, they wererepatriated to British Columbia.I remember as a child first meeting June, an ebullientelderly woman whose life had followed a remarkablecourse. In her later years she suffered a stroke that lefther partly paralyzed; after a slow and arduous recoveryshe was able to walk again, but with a limp. In thoseyears I remember going for an outing with June, then inher seventies. Somehow she wandered off, and after severalminutes I heard a feeble yell—June crying for help.She had fallen and could not get up on her own. I rushed
- Page 370 and 371: 370/661The difference between the t
- Page 372 and 373: 4. Self-control. The ability to mod
- Page 374 and 375: 374/661efforts to get solace will m
- Page 376 and 377: opportunity at all, let alone equal
- Page 378 and 379: learned, and how grim the costs for
- Page 380 and 381: 380/661distress of a child nearby w
- Page 382 and 383: 382/661of the brain's limbic center
- Page 384 and 385: 384/661In ensuing months, the Purdy
- Page 386 and 387: 386/661disorder, or PTSD. At the co
- Page 388 and 389: endured semistarvation, the slaught
- Page 390 and 391: 390/661overwhelming terror. 4 While
- Page 392 and 393: and dying—or for a teacher there,
- Page 394 and 395: 394/661ceruleus—alerting the body
- Page 396 and 397: All these neural changes offer shor
- Page 398 and 399: of calm—the amygdala never relear
- Page 400 and 401: 400/661better outcome: sometimes in
- Page 402 and 403: ex-lover. The man brought them to a
- Page 404 and 405: 404/661friends and family to form a
- Page 406 and 407: 406/661The therapist encourages the
- Page 408 and 409: 408/661Aftereffects or occasional r
- Page 410 and 411: 410/661cannot keep it from reacting
- Page 412 and 413: 412/661habits of the heart learned
- Page 414 and 415: 414/661different pattern of brain a
- Page 416 and 417: 416/661monsters. Though he has felt
- Page 418 and 419: 418/661five infants falls into the
- Page 422 and 423: 422/661to help her up, and as I did
- Page 424 and 425: 424/661or the other type, says Davi
- Page 426 and 427: 426/661parents, and so how they lea
- Page 428 and 429: 428/661When the encounter takes pla
- Page 430 and 431: 430/661spontaneously outgrew their
- Page 432 and 433: 432/661was reopened, the animal was
- Page 434 and 435: The remarkable finding, though, was
- Page 436 and 437: 436/661switch for distress. The inf
- Page 438 and 439: 438/661emotional habits are malleab
- Page 440 and 441: 15The Cost of Emotional IlliteracyI
- Page 442 and 443: example, heroin and cocaine use amo
- Page 444 and 445: 444/661While any of these problems
- Page 446 and 447: both parents work long hours, so th
- Page 448 and 449: 448/661themselves as victims and ca
- Page 450 and 451: 450/661But studies that have follow
- Page 452 and 453: 452/661attracted to their defiant s
- Page 454 and 455: 454/661aggressive kids learn to con
- Page 456 and 457: 456/661Dana, sixteen, had always se
- Page 458 and 459: that predispose children to react t
- Page 460 and 461: 460/661worldwide. When I asked expe
- Page 462 and 463: 462/661more severe episodes later i
- Page 464 and 465: Indeed, when depressed children hav
- Page 466 and 467: 466/661when they get a worse grade
- Page 468 and 469: 468/661The good news: there is ever
developing the dread of a recurrence that leads people
with panic disorder to shrink from life.
NOTHING BOTHERS ME: THE
CHEERFUL TEMPERAMENT
421/661
In the 1920s, as a young woman, my aunt June left her
home in Kansas City and ventured on her own to Shanghai—a
dangerous journey for a solitary woman in those
years. There June met and married a British detective in
the colonial police force of that international center of
commerce and intrigue. When the Japanese captured
Shanghai at the outset of World War II, my aunt and her
husband were interned in the prison camp depicted in
the book and movie Empire of the Sun. After surviving
five horrific years in the prison camp, she and her husband
had, literally, lost everything. Penniless, they were
repatriated to British Columbia.
I remember as a child first meeting June, an ebullient
elderly woman whose life had followed a remarkable
course. In her later years she suffered a stroke that left
her partly paralyzed; after a slow and arduous recovery
she was able to walk again, but with a limp. In those
years I remember going for an outing with June, then in
her seventies. Somehow she wandered off, and after several
minutes I heard a feeble yell—June crying for help.
She had fallen and could not get up on her own. I rushed
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