Emotional inteligence
348/661comforting than the same small number of friendshipsfor a man.Of course, solitude is not the same as isolation; manypeople who live on their own or see few friends are contentand healthy. Rather, it is the subjective sense of beingcut off from people and having no one to turn to thatis the medical risk. This finding is ominous in light ofthe increasing isolation bred by solitary TV-watchingand the falling away of social habits such as clubs andvisits in modern urban societies, and suggests an addedvalue to self-help groups such as Alcoholics Anonymousas surrogate communities.The power of isolation as a mortality risk factor—andthe healing power of close ties—can be seen in the studyof one hundred bone marrow transplant patients. 39Among patients who felt they had strong emotional supportfrom their spouse, family, or friends, 54 percentsurvived the transplants after two years, versus just 20percent among those who reported little such support.Similarly, elderly people who suffer heart attacks, buthave two or more people in their lives they can rely onfor emotional support, are more than twice as likely tosurvive longer than a year after an attack than are thosepeople with no such support. 40Perhaps the most telling testimony to the healing potencyof emotional ties is a Swedish study published in
349/6611993. 41 All the men living in the Swedish city of Goteborgwho were born in 1933 were offered a free medicalexam; seven years later the 752 men who had come forthe exam were contacted again. Of these, 41 had died inthe intervening years.Men who had originally reported being under intenseemotional stress had a death rate three times greaterthan those who said their lives were calm and placid.The emotional distress was due to events such as seriousfinancial trouble, feeling insecure at work or beingforced out of a job, being the object of a legal action, orgoing through a divorce. Having had three or more ofthese troubles within the year before the exam was astronger predictor of dying within the ensuing sevenyears than were medical indicators such as high bloodpressure, high concentrations of blood triglycerides, orhigh serum cholesterol levels.Yet among men who said they had a dependable webof intimacy—a wife, close friends, and the like—therewas no relationship whatever between high stresslevels and death rate. Having people to turn to and talkwith, people who could offer solace, help, and suggestions,protected them from the deadly impact of life'srigors and trauma.The quality of relationships as well as their sheernumber seems key to buffering stress. Negative
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349/661
1993. 41 All the men living in the Swedish city of Goteborg
who were born in 1933 were offered a free medical
exam; seven years later the 752 men who had come for
the exam were contacted again. Of these, 41 had died in
the intervening years.
Men who had originally reported being under intense
emotional stress had a death rate three times greater
than those who said their lives were calm and placid.
The emotional distress was due to events such as serious
financial trouble, feeling insecure at work or being
forced out of a job, being the object of a legal action, or
going through a divorce. Having had three or more of
these troubles within the year before the exam was a
stronger predictor of dying within the ensuing seven
years than were medical indicators such as high blood
pressure, high concentrations of blood triglycerides, or
high serum cholesterol levels.
Yet among men who said they had a dependable web
of intimacy—a wife, close friends, and the like—there
was no relationship whatever between high stress
levels and death rate. Having people to turn to and talk
with, people who could offer solace, help, and suggestions,
protected them from the deadly impact of life's
rigors and trauma.
The quality of relationships as well as their sheer
number seems key to buffering stress. Negative
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