Emotional inteligence
116/661have treated them, leaving them less vulnerable to theupheavals of the emotional brain.As we have seen, the design of the brain means thatwe very often have little or no control over when we areswept by emotion, nor over what emotion it will be. Butwe can have some say in how long an emotion will last.The issue arises not with garden-variety sadness, worry,or anger; normally such moods pass with time and patience.But when these emotions are of great intensityand linger past an appropriate point, they shade over intotheir distressing extremes—chronic anxiety, uncontrollablerage, depression. And, at their most severe andintractable, medication, psychotherapy, or both may beneeded to lift them.In these times, one sign of the capacity for emotionalself-regulation may be recognizing when chronic agitationof the emotional brain is too strong to be overcomewithout pharmacologic help. For example, two thirds ofthose who suffer from manic-depression have neverbeen treated for the disorder. But lithium or newer medicationscan thwart the characteristic cycle of paralyzingdepression alternating with manic episodes that mixchaotic elation and grandiosity with irritation and rage.One problem with manic-depression is that while peopleare in the throes of mania they often feel so overly confidentthat they see no need for help of any kind despite
117/661the disastrous decisions they are making. In such severeemotional disorders psychiatric medication offers a toolfor managing life better.But when it comes to vanquishing the more usualrange of bad moods, we are left to our own devices. Unfortunately,those devices are not always effective—atleast such is the conclusion reached by Diane Tice, apsychologist at Case Western Reserve University, whoasked more than four hundred men and women aboutthe strategies they used to escape foul moods, and howsuccessful those tactics were for them. 2Not everyone agrees with the philosophical premisethat bad moods should be changed; there are, Ticefound, "mood purists," the 5 percent or so of people whosaid they never try to change a mood since, in their view,all emotions are "natural" and should be experiencedjust as they present themselves, no matter how dispiriting.And then there were those who regularly sought toget into unpleasant moods for pragmatic reasons: physicianswho needed to be somber to give patients badnews; social activists who nurtured their outrage at injusticeso as to be more effective in battling it; even ayoung man who told of working up his anger to help hislittle brother with playground bullies. And some peoplewere positively Machiavellian about manipulatingmoods—witness the bill collectors who purposely
- Page 66 and 67: 66/661the amygdala, whatever the ne
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- Page 70 and 71: 70/661After transferring to a priva
- Page 72 and 73: course it accounts for. But what da
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- Page 84 and 85: 84/661Mr. Spock, the archetype of d
- Page 86 and 87: you get that are essential for inte
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- Page 90 and 91: the subtle social signals that indi
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- Page 94 and 95: 4Know ThyselfA belligerent samurai,
- Page 96 and 97: 96/661faculty of mind in writing of
- Page 98 and 99: 98/661• Self-aware. Aware of thei
- Page 100 and 101: 100/661Temple University, to assess
- Page 102 and 103: 102/661Gary was emotionally flat, c
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- Page 108 and 109: 108/661accepting virtually every po
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- Page 118 and 119: worked themselves into a rage in or
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- Page 124 and 125: subsided, and a third on top of tho
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- Page 128 and 129: it stops that angry train of though
- Page 130 and 131: Tice found that ventilating anger i
- Page 132 and 133: 132/661the anxiety disorders: phobi
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- Page 138 and 139: 138/661learn relaxation methods tha
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- Page 142 and 143: 142/661people ruminate. Worrying ab
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- Page 150 and 151: pain of their own. Throwing oneself
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- Page 154 and 155: 154/661not faking their lack of awa
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the disastrous decisions they are making. In such severe
emotional disorders psychiatric medication offers a tool
for managing life better.
But when it comes to vanquishing the more usual
range of bad moods, we are left to our own devices. Unfortunately,
those devices are not always effective—at
least such is the conclusion reached by Diane Tice, a
psychologist at Case Western Reserve University, who
asked more than four hundred men and women about
the strategies they used to escape foul moods, and how
successful those tactics were for them. 2
Not everyone agrees with the philosophical premise
that bad moods should be changed; there are, Tice
found, "mood purists," the 5 percent or so of people who
said they never try to change a mood since, in their view,
all emotions are "natural" and should be experienced
just as they present themselves, no matter how dispiriting.
And then there were those who regularly sought to
get into unpleasant moods for pragmatic reasons: physicians
who needed to be somber to give patients bad
news; social activists who nurtured their outrage at injustice
so as to be more effective in battling it; even a
young man who told of working up his anger to help his
little brother with playground bullies. And some people
were positively Machiavellian about manipulating
moods—witness the bill collectors who purposely
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