Shadow and Bone by Leigh Bardugo (z-lib.org).mobi

In seconds, he was on his feet and we were clinging to each other through the
iron bars, our hands clasped tightly together. I couldn’t stop the sobs that shook
me.
“Shhhh. It’s okay. Alina, it’s okay.”
“You have the night,” said Ivan, and disappeared back up the stairs. When we
heard the outer gate clang shut, Mal turned to me.
His eyes roved over my face. “I can’t believe he let you come.”
Fresh tears spilled over my cheeks. “Mal, he let me come because …”
“When?” he asked hoarsely.
“Tomorrow. On the Shadow Fold.”
He swallowed, and I could see him struggle with the knowledge, but all he
said was, “All right.”
I let out a sound that was half laugh, half sob. “Only you could contemplate
imminent death and just say ‘all right’.”
He smiled at me and pushed the hair back from my tear-stained face. “How
about ‘oh no’?”
“Mal, if I’d been stronger …”
“If I’d been stronger, I would have driven a knife through your heart.”
“I wish you had,” I muttered.
“Well, I don’t.”
I looked down at our clasped hands. “Mal, what the Darkling said in the glade
about … about him and me. I didn’t … I never …”
“It doesn’t matter.”
I looked up at him. “It doesn’t?”
“No,” he said, a little too fiercely.
“I don’t think I believe you.”
“So maybe I don’t believe it yet either, not completely, but it’s the truth.” He
clutched my hands more tightly, holding them close to his heart. “I don’t care if
you danced naked on the roof of the Little Palace with him. I love you, Alina,
even the part of you that loved him.”
I wanted to deny it, to erase it, but I couldn’t. Another sob shook me. “I hate
that I ever thought … that I ever—”
“Do you blame me for every mistake I made? For every girl I tumbled? For
every dumb thing I’ve said? Because if we start running tallies on stupid, you
know who’s going to come out ahead.”
“No, I don’t blame you.” I managed a small smile. “Much.”
He grinned and my heart flip-flopped the way it always had. “We found our
way back to each other, Alina. That’s all that matters.”
He kissed me through the bars, the cold iron pressing against my cheek as his