Shadow and Bone by Leigh Bardugo (z-lib.org).mobi

to you tonight?”
I hesitated. I knew that if I said yes, there would be no turning back. My skin
still burned where he’d touched me, but the excitement of the moment was
melting away, and a bit of sense was returning. I wasn’t sure what I wanted. I
wasn’t sure of anything.
I waited too long. We heard more voices coming down the hall. The Darkling
pulled the door shut, striding out into the hallway as I stepped back into the
darkness. I waited nervously, trying to think of an excuse for why I might be
hiding in an empty room.
The voices passed and I let out a long, shuddering breath. I hadn’t had a
chance to say yes or no to the Darkling. Would he come anyway? Did I want
him to? My mind was whirring. I had to set myself to rights and get back to the
party. The Darkling could just disappear, but I didn’t have that luxury.
I peered out into the corridor and then hurried to the ballroom, stopping to
check my appearance in one of the gilt mirrors. It wasn’t as bad as I’d feared.
My cheeks were flushed, my lips a bit bruised looking, but there was nothing I
could do about that. I smoothed my hair and straightened my kefta. As I was
about to enter the ballroom, I heard a door open at the other end of the hallway.
The Apparat was hurrying towards me, his brown robes flapping behind him. Oh
please not now.
“Alina!” he called.
“I have to get back to the ball,” I said cheerily and turned away from him.
“I must speak with you! Things are moving far more quickly than—”
I slipped back into the party with what I hoped was a serene expression.
Almost instantly, I was surrounded by nobles hoping to meet me and
congratulate me on the demonstration. Sergei hurried over with my other
Heartrender guards, murmuring apologies for losing me in the crowd. Glancing
over my shoulder, I was relieved to see the Apparat’s ragged form swallowed by
a tide of partygoers.
I did my best to make polite conversation and to answer the questions that the
guests asked. One woman had tears in her eyes and asked me to bless her. I had
no idea what to do, so I patted her hand in what I hoped was a reassuring
manner. All I wanted was to be alone to think, to sort through the confused mess
of emotions in my head. The champagne wasn’t helping.
As one group of guests moved off to be replaced by another, I recognised the
long, melancholy face of the Corporalnik who had ridden with me and Ivan in
the Darkling’s coach and helped to fight off the Fjerdan assassins. I scrambled to
remember his name.
He came to my rescue, bowing deeply and saying, “Fedyor Kaminsky.”