2019 Issue 5 Sep/Oct - Focus Mid-Tenn Magazine

lgbt seniors
DOES OUR AGE IMPACT
THE VALUE OF PRIDE?
story by Mike Smith
Certainly, arguments have been made that the older we are,
the more importance we place on the value of Pride and its
hard-fought celebrations. Then again, many younger gays will
suggest that there is no way one could enjoy non-stop pride events
more than themselves.
They are prideful and
wear their pride pridefully,
damnit. And, of course,
to most they are both
right; one is hard pressed
to find someone in the
LGBT+ community who
doesn’t value the work that
has been done since the
Stonewall riots to allow us
the freedoms to celebrate
who we are openly and
yes, pridefully. So, does
our age impact how we
feel about pride and more
importantly, its value?
I know of two brothers
in their 40s/50s who are
both openly gay. Only six
years apart in age, their
experiences are quite
different. Both from rural
America, the eldest of the
two — not having LGBT+
community role models
as a child — had to find his
own path and went off to
college and did just that and
connected with his tribe
and began to connect with
others to celebrate Pride.
Still somewhat careful
with when and where to
display his pridefulness and
only when he and his friends
could retreat out of town
would they truly celebrate
— attend the events, the
parade, wear their prideful
attire, etc. Pride celebrations
provided a certain
“coverage” and safety that
the older brother hadn’t
experienced until his 20s.
By the time the younger
of the brothers rose to an
age that he was beginning
to become comfortable in
his gayness, he had his older
brother who introduced him
to Pride, but also a queer
community which provided
sanctuary as he continued to
explore his sexuality.
While Pride celebrations
were certainly fun and still
somewhat taboo to his
straight friends or work
community, he had been
introduced to the gay
lifestyle by his brother,
therefore not feeling as
though festivities were his
only place to connect — he
had found a community
before he experienced his
first pride events.
Their experiences clearly
different, but more valuable
to one than the other?
Perhaps this isn’t about Pride
— the festivities — at all, but
simply about our time in the
march to equality with Pride
as a marking point annually
in one’s life.
Older generations had
to secretly engage with
their community, while
nowadays, every brand out
there slaps the rainbow
on their product, and we
can’t hide from it. We
are all prideful—even our
toilet paper and shoes are
prideful it seems.
Pride’s value is derived
from each of our own
personal experiences. From
the black trans woman
who threw the first brick
at Stonewall 50 years ago
to the straight teenage
allies, to the six-year-old
who walked in this year’s
first Pride Parade right
here in Nashville – the Pride
experience is personal and
you bet, has immeasurable
value, no matter our age.
SUCCESS / SEP+OCT 2019 / focusmidtenn.com / Page 23