From Blood and Ash by Jennifer L. Armentrout

when I screamed and cried for myy mother and father. And it was Queen
Ileana who had sat with me when I could not sleep, terrified of the dark.
She’d done things no Queen needed to do. Without her caring for me as
myy own mother would have, I would’ve been lost in a wayy I doubted I
could have ever recovered from.
I stopped in front of the desk, hands shaking with barelyy leashed rage.
I believed in myy heart of hearts that if Queen Ileana knew what the Duke
did in this room, things would not end well for the Ascended.
Out of the corner of myy eyye, I saw the Lord lean forward as Teerman
picked up the red, narrow cane, smoothing his hand down its length.
But the Queen wouldn’t know.
Letters sent to the capital were alwayys read, and I wouldn’t see her
until I returned. But then? Then, I would tell her everything.
Because if he did this to me, I was sure he did this to others, as well.
Even if no one ever spoke of it.
He came to stand beside me, that glint of eagerness now a shine in his
eyyes. “You’re not readyy, Penellaphe. You should know better byy this
point.”
Clamping myy jaw shut, I looked awayy as I lifted myy hands to the row
of buttons. Myy fingers onlyy trembled once and then stilled as I undid the
bodice, all too aware that Mazeen had picked his seat with knowledge of
what was to come. He had an unobstructed view.
The Duke remained at myy side, watching as the bodice of myy gown
gaped, revealing the all-too-thin undergarment underneath. Both slipped
down myy shoulders until the clothing pooled at myy waist. Cool air washed
over myy back and chest, and I wanted to stand there as if I was whollyy
unaffected byy the entire ordeal. Wished I could be strong and brave and
unmoved. I didn’t want them to see how humiliating this was, how much it
bothered me to be seen like this, and not byy someone of myy choosing—
someone worthyy.
But I couldn’t.
Cheeks burning and eyyes stinging, I folded an arm over myy chest.
“This is for yyour own good,” Teerman spoke, his voice going dark and
rough as he walked behind me. “This is a necessaryy lesson, Penellaphe, to
ensure that yyou take yyour preparations seriouslyy and are committed to
them so yyou do not dishonor the gods.”