Domination & submission _ the BDSM relationship handbook ( PDFDrive )
has two wives, named Julie and Ginger, who live in separate households. Julieis his submissive, and their relationship dynamic never changes. Ginger is hisDomme, and their relationship dynamic also never changes. Chuck claims tolove both women equally, and expresses no preference for either his dominant orsubmissive role in the relationships. Interestingly enough, Chuck and hispartners keep it relatively vanilla in the bedroom, and none of them are active inor seek out others in the lifestyle.Top-leaning BDSM SwitchThe Top-leaning BDSM Switch enjoys both topping and bottoming but preferstopping, regardless of his other emotional and relationship dynamicpreferences. Example: Kirk is a Dominant in his primary relationship, and thatnever changes. However, when he and his submissive Kim attend BDSM playparties, he has been known to enjoy bottoming to some extent. His preference,however, is and always will be topping.Bottom-leaning BDSM SwitchThe Bottom-leaning BDSM Switch enjoys both topping and bottoming butprefers bottoming, regardless of his other emotional and relationship dynamicpreferences. Example: William considers himself a monogamous slave to hispoly Mistress Victoria, who also has other slaves. Occasionally, his Mistresshosts play parties for the entire clan, and even though William has no significantemotional connection with her other slaves, he does sometimes engage in BDSMplay with them, and often switches with a preference for bottoming.Balanced BDSM SwitchThe Balanced BDSM Switch is equally attracted to and finds fulfillment in therole of a Top or a Bottom in his kink activities. Example: Sierra is a submissivein her primary relationship with her Dominant Joseph, and that never changes.However, at BDSM play parties, Sierra equally enjoys giving and gettingspankings, paddlings, floggings and other forms of impact-play.D/s-BDSM SwitchThe D/s-BDSM Switch is able to change his dominance-orientation in both hisrelationship dynamic and his kink activities, though the switching may not besynchronized by timing, direction or intensity. Example: Bob is a D/s BDSMSwitch who is the hinge in a poly “V” relationship, where he is Dominant to
Sue, but submissive to Diane. His kink activities with each of his partners staysaligned with his relationship role, but when he attends his local BDSM groupplay parties, he is equally likely to assume the role of a Top or a Bottom.I am fairly certain that, as a result of what I have written here, I will be delugedwith countless letters, messages and emails asking me to divulge the“authoritative source” that has served as the wellspring for this unique methodof categorizing Switches. To those folks, I can only point to the nearest bottle oftequila. As far as I know, I am the only one crazy enough to have made such anattempt and, frankly, I’m beginning to think that maybe there was a darn goodreason why people way smarter than me didn’t try it.If You Are a SwitchIf you are a Switch, or if you are beginning to suspect that you might be one, myadvice to you would be to embrace who you are, and refuse to be pressured intohaving to decide between the two ends of the dominance-spectrum, especially ifyou are perfectly comfortable sliding back and forth along its length. On acompletely unrelated side note, I probably shouldn’t get too comfortable saying“sliding back and forth along its length.”For most people, their dominance orientation is no more a choice than theirsexual orientation. It is simply a matter of who they are. It develops andsometimes changes as they mature, just like every other aspect of theirpersonality. It is hardly the set-in-concrete, black-and-white proposition thatsome people seem to think it is.Virtually no one would feel justified in demanding that a bisexual pick aheterosexual or homosexual preference and just stick to it, yet there has neverbeen a shortage of people who think it’s perfectly acceptable to make similardemands of Switches.If you happen to be one of those people, perhaps now would be a good time torethink your approach.
- Page 32 and 33: Types of DominantsThere are many di
- Page 34 and 35: subculture within the D/s lifestyle
- Page 36 and 37: person’s anus. Yes, there really
- Page 38 and 39: life to keep twenty-seven angry sla
- Page 40 and 41: from such riff-raff? He knows all o
- Page 42 and 43: was me - or more accurately, my own
- Page 44 and 45: crying out, “Geez, Sir Knight! No
- Page 46 and 47: Chapter 2: The SubmissiveWhat is a
- Page 48 and 49: IntrospectionIf you are someone who
- Page 50 and 51: I stated previously, most people ca
- Page 52 and 53: behavior pleases her mate great, bu
- Page 54 and 55: at the beginning of any relationshi
- Page 56 and 57: her Dominant to have an orgasm - an
- Page 58 and 59: Types of SubmissivesIf you are in t
- Page 60 and 61: also requires us to believe that we
- Page 62 and 63: hard - really hard.Theoretically, k
- Page 64 and 65: accomplished by dinner time. This c
- Page 66 and 67: categories: kittens, puppies, and p
- Page 68 and 69: a better partner. This usually cons
- Page 70 and 71: My Two Cents on SubmissionJade simp
- Page 72 and 73: Charlotte, the Spider: I'm versatil
- Page 74 and 75: the two extremes of Dominant and su
- Page 77 and 78: IntrospectionHow do you know if you
- Page 79 and 80: experience to speak of and just a f
- Page 81: enjoyed practically everything she
- Page 85 and 86: I have a very good friend named Ann
- Page 87 and 88: Chapter 4: The PrimalWhat is a Prim
- Page 89 and 90: Michael Makai’s PRIMAAL AnalysisP
- Page 91 and 92: o Award yourself an extra point if
- Page 93 and 94: How Primal Are You?0 to 15:You are
- Page 95 and 96: Primal PreferencesNow that we’ve
- Page 97 and 98: covered-in-birthday-cake kind of se
- Page 99 and 100: encounters. When Furries gather in
- Page 101 and 102: Primal ScenesA primal scene is not
- Page 103 and 104: She drew back for a split second, a
- Page 105 and 106: Primal InstinctsIn the final analys
- Page 107 and 108: We went back to her house, where we
- Page 109 and 110: Chapter 5: Online BDSM Relationship
- Page 111 and 112: CompuServe chat became available, i
- Page 113 and 114: worlds? The process of choosing an
- Page 115 and 116: sort. There’s no shame in admitti
- Page 117 and 118: the online BDSM lifestyle, but they
- Page 119 and 120: ChallengesDespite all of the appare
- Page 121 and 122: should suffice to know that if thes
- Page 123 and 124: · The percentage of vanilla online
- Page 125 and 126: them. An IP address usually looks s
- Page 127 and 128: Where Is It Going?Major League Base
- Page 129 and 130: by a radioactive mule.” (Hat tip
- Page 131 and 132: people discover the utility of cert
has two wives, named Julie and Ginger, who live in separate households. Julie
is his submissive, and their relationship dynamic never changes. Ginger is his
Domme, and their relationship dynamic also never changes. Chuck claims to
love both women equally, and expresses no preference for either his dominant or
submissive role in the relationships. Interestingly enough, Chuck and his
partners keep it relatively vanilla in the bedroom, and none of them are active in
or seek out others in the lifestyle.
Top-leaning BDSM Switch
The Top-leaning BDSM Switch enjoys both topping and bottoming but prefers
topping, regardless of his other emotional and relationship dynamic
preferences. Example: Kirk is a Dominant in his primary relationship, and that
never changes. However, when he and his submissive Kim attend BDSM play
parties, he has been known to enjoy bottoming to some extent. His preference,
however, is and always will be topping.
Bottom-leaning BDSM Switch
The Bottom-leaning BDSM Switch enjoys both topping and bottoming but
prefers bottoming, regardless of his other emotional and relationship dynamic
preferences. Example: William considers himself a monogamous slave to his
poly Mistress Victoria, who also has other slaves. Occasionally, his Mistress
hosts play parties for the entire clan, and even though William has no significant
emotional connection with her other slaves, he does sometimes engage in BDSM
play with them, and often switches with a preference for bottoming.
Balanced BDSM Switch
The Balanced BDSM Switch is equally attracted to and finds fulfillment in the
role of a Top or a Bottom in his kink activities. Example: Sierra is a submissive
in her primary relationship with her Dominant Joseph, and that never changes.
However, at BDSM play parties, Sierra equally enjoys giving and getting
spankings, paddlings, floggings and other forms of impact-play.
D/s-BDSM Switch
The D/s-BDSM Switch is able to change his dominance-orientation in both his
relationship dynamic and his kink activities, though the switching may not be
synchronized by timing, direction or intensity. Example: Bob is a D/s BDSM
Switch who is the hinge in a poly “V” relationship, where he is Dominant to
Change language