Domination & submission _ the BDSM relationship handbook ( PDFDrive )

Mistaking BDSM for Sex
Robert D., a twenty-six-year-old restaurant manager in Kansas had always been
curious about the BDSM lifestyle, but had never made much of an effort to seek
out like-minded individuals or a fetish group in his home town – that is, until
now. Robert had recently created an account at one of the major online BDSM
portals, learned about a local group having a get-together, and decided to attend.
The munch was being held at a nearby Pizza Hut, which regularly reserved a
semi-private party-room for the large group. Robert was familiar with the place,
which helped him to get past his nervousness about going.
Robert arrived at the appointed hour and introduced himself to those who were
already in attendance. He enjoyed his pizza and listened to the conversations
that seemed to swirl around and across the table. The two-hour social passed
quickly and enjoyably, and at the end of it, one of the group leaders approached
him discreetly and invited him to the after-munch play party. Robert hadn’t
really been expecting that, but was flattered and excited at the prospect. Without
hesitation, he agreed to follow his new friend to the home of the member hosting
the event. During the ensuing twenty minute drive, visions of decadent, nubile
sex-slaves danced in his head. Alas, it was not to be.
Robert spent close to three hours at the play party and then returned home
feeling deflated and disappointed. Before crawling into bed, Robert took a few
moments to journal his reactions to his first-ever BDSM play party, and post
them online for his friends to peruse and perhaps comment upon. His personal
reflections, which have been redacted here for content and to protect his privacy,
reflect what could have been the thoughts of any person new to the lifestyle,
attending an event like this one for the first time:
“I was excited and nervous about attending a BDSM play party for the first time,
and wasn’t sure what I was going to be expected to know or do, so I decided to
just watch and see what would happen... which turned out to be - practically
nothing. One of the women there stripped down to a thong as soon as she
arrived, but practically everyone else either kept their clothes on, or undressed
for specific activities and got dressed again. This was not at all what I expected.
I had expected this to be a clothing-free event, and was fully prepared to get
naked myself, but I guess I had the wrong idea about how they do things. It’s
probably just as well, since a lot of the people there weren’t the sort you want to