Domination & submission _ the BDSM relationship handbook ( PDFDrive )

extraordinarily difficult to have animated discussions about group activities
without referring to specific individuals by name, but give it your best shot. At
the very least, you should avoid passing along gossip and other personal
information about anyone at all cost. People love to hear gossip, but they will
also naturally assume that someday, they’ll end up as the subject of your gossip.
Don’t assume everyone is there to hook up, get laid, or find someone who shares
their kink. The most common reason people have for seeking out a BDSM
group is to learn that they are not alone; that there are others out there who are a
lot like they are. Yes, there are plenty of people who are seeking out others who
share their particular kink, but the fact remains, the majority of people who
attend a munch are there simply to enjoy socializing with others who understand
their world-view. Once you have attended a few events, you’ll have a much
better understanding of who is or isn’t looking to hook up, and you’ll have an
informed basis for deciding whether or not you’re interested.
Don’t make your personal fetish the first thing you tell people about yourself.
This may come as a complete surprise to you, but introducing yourself to
complete strangers as “Bob, the guy who likes to suck semen from another guy’s
anus” is probably not the best way to make a good first impression. By the
way, that’s called
felching, and yes, there really is a name for it. A good rule of thumb might be, if
it isn’t something you’d put in your Facebook profile, it probably isn’t
something you should blurt out in the first two minutes of a conversation with a
stranger, either.
Don’t take or use a camera at the munch.
The reasons for this are the same as for not asking for or revealing too much
personal information. People generally don’t take photographs unless they plan
to do something with those photographs, and that thought makes some people
profoundly uncomfortable. Imagine how the mother of an
eight-year-old might react when she looks at someone’s Facebook page and sees
a photo of a group of people, one of whom happens to be her child’s teacher,
with the caption, “Here’s me, hanging out with my fellow pervs!” It’s
hard to envision any way that a discovery like that bodes well for anyone
concerned.