Domination & submission _ the BDSM relationship handbook ( PDFDrive )

are “I need help?” If so, then you just may be a Dominant.
Pride can be a double-edged sword for the Dominant. It shapes and defines him
like no other character trait yet it is simultaneously his greatest weakness.
Despite the fact that he necessarily has an extraordinarily healthy ego, the
Dominant is always painfully aware that he is far from perfect. Nevertheless, he
often creates and nurtures for himself and others the illusion that he is always in
control and rarely in need of assistance. To accept help, even when it is sorely
needed, is to allow a chink in the carefully crafted illusion that makes him what
and who he is.
If a Dominant allows you to help him, in even the tiniest way, you should
probably consider that a great honor. In doing so, he has revealed a part of
himself that he would rather not be confronted with, much less have to reveal to
others. It is also an integral part of the power exchange that occurs between
Dominant and submissive, which we’ll discuss at greater length elsewhere in this
book.
Do people seem all too willing to grant you authority over various aspects of
their lives? Examples might range from the serious to the mundane, such as
trusting you with the keys to their homes or with access to their online accounts,
or something as simple as ordering for them in restaurants. Are you often asked
to help make important decisions for others, more because of your decisionmaking
ability than because of your expertise on the subject at hand? When you
are a member of a group or organization, are you frequently nominated for or
elected to positions of authority, whether you want to be or not? If so, you just
may be a Dominant.
Are you energetic and task oriented? Dominants tend to be very focused on
accomplishing their goals, even if the goals may be unclear or out of reach at
times. You won’t typically find a Dominant spending a lot of time soul
searching, or second guessing his decisions. He is an unstoppable force until he
hits an immovable object, in which case he often simply pivots and shoots off in
another direction, until the next immovable object is encountered. When a
Dominant is asked why he does what he does, the answer is almost invariably,
because he can. If this sounds like you, you just may be a Dominant.
Are you sometimes hard to get along with? Anyone can be difficult to get along
with at times, but the key in this instance is the why. A Dominant is usually