Domination & submission _ the BDSM relationship handbook ( PDFDrive )

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Types of BDSM Toys & EquipmentWe could easily fill several volumes discussing the many different kinds ofBDSM toys that are available and how they can be used to best effect. Everyday, new and exciting items are introduced, and it can be an exhausting task justtrying to keep up with the latest technology and lifestyle trends. What follows isan admittedly cursory treatment, intended only to introduce the novice to thefascinating world of BDSM hardware. Readers who already have a great deal ofexperience with BDSM toys and equipment may find this section a bit tedious,and are invited to skip ahead to the next section.For the sake of simplicity, we’ll classify all BDSM toys and equipment intoseven general categories: bondage, impact, piercing, sensation/sensorydeprivation, torture, role-play accessories, and furnishings.
Bondage GearBondage gear is primarily designed to restrict a person’s mobility orfunctionality. The most common use for bondage gear is to restrain the arms andlegs, however, it can also be used to immobilize or reduce the functionality ofthe head, neck, torso, hands, feet, and even genitalia. The quality of this kind ofgear can range from absolute junk at the low end to exquisitely crafted works ofart at the high end. Generally speaking, the comfort, durability and functionalityof bondage gear purchased from novelty stores are usually quite low, since thoseestablishments cater primarily to vanilla purchasers who are looking toexperiment. For higher-end, better constructed bondage gear, your best bet is topatronize the specialty retailers that cater exclusively to a BDSM clientele.The following is a list of some of the most common types of bondage gear youmay encounter, in no particular order, with descriptions, purchasing tips andsome observations on their safe use. Some types of generic sex toys are notlisted here, so we can better focus on BDSM-specific items.Wrist and Ankle CuffsWrist and ankle cuffs are probably the first items that most novices think of andpurchase when they begin experimenting with bondage toys. They come in awide range of styles, designs and materials and can range in cost and qualityfrom “pretty, but completely non-functional” to “made-to-orderawesomeness.” Typical wrist or ankle cuff designs consist of quality heavydutyleather, stainless steel buckles for adjustments, and one or more D-rings tofacilitate attachments. Some of the signs of an inferior product are poor leatherquality, the use of non-colorfast dyes in the leather or other materials, flimsy orsloppy construction with sharp or rough edges, plastic or coated aluminum D-rings, or any disclaimer that states the product is “for novelty use only.” That’smarketing-weasel-speak which, in plain English means, “you shouldn’t expectthis product to actually function.”We should also include in this category a large assortment of handcuffs, thighcuffs, thumb cuffs, shackles and even zip-ties. In addition to the obviouspsychological impact of their use, all cuffs are designed to keep a person’s limbsimmobilized or dysfunctional, and they can all become a safety concern if notused correctly. Any time you use wrist or ankle cuffs of any kind, you shouldmaintain continuous supervision of the bound person and make periodic checks
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DOMINATION & SUBMISSION:THE BDSMREL
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DedicationThis book is for the peop
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Primal InstinctsMy Two Cents on Pri
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My Two Cents on Sex, Love, and BDSM
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PREFACE
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getting just a little ahead of your
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That is why you should fully unders
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ACKNOWLEDGMENTSI want to express my
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Chapter 1: The DominantWhat is a Do
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great majority of humanity.A very t
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IntrospectionDo you like being told
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more focused on facts than feelings
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also the not-so-insignificant matte
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equal partnership between two peopl
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If you are polyamorous, are youpoly
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Types of DominantsThere are many di
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subculture within the D/s lifestyle
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person’s anus. Yes, there really
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life to keep twenty-seven angry sla
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from such riff-raff? He knows all o
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was me - or more accurately, my own
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crying out, “Geez, Sir Knight! No
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Chapter 2: The SubmissiveWhat is a
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IntrospectionIf you are someone who
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I stated previously, most people ca
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behavior pleases her mate great, bu
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at the beginning of any relationshi
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her Dominant to have an orgasm - an
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Types of SubmissivesIf you are in t
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also requires us to believe that we
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hard - really hard.Theoretically, k
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accomplished by dinner time. This c
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categories: kittens, puppies, and p
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a better partner. This usually cons
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My Two Cents on SubmissionJade simp
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Charlotte, the Spider: I'm versatil
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the two extremes of Dominant and su
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IntrospectionHow do you know if you
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experience to speak of and just a f
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enjoyed practically everything she
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Sue, but submissive to Diane. His k
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I have a very good friend named Ann
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Chapter 4: The PrimalWhat is a Prim
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Michael Makai’s PRIMAAL AnalysisP
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o Award yourself an extra point if
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How Primal Are You?0 to 15:You are
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Primal PreferencesNow that we’ve
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covered-in-birthday-cake kind of se
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encounters. When Furries gather in
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Primal ScenesA primal scene is not
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She drew back for a split second, a
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Primal InstinctsIn the final analys
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We went back to her house, where we
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Chapter 5: Online BDSM Relationship
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CompuServe chat became available, i
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worlds? The process of choosing an
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sort. There’s no shame in admitti
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the online BDSM lifestyle, but they
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ChallengesDespite all of the appare
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should suffice to know that if thes
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· The percentage of vanilla online
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them. An IP address usually looks s
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Where Is It Going?Major League Base
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by a radioactive mule.” (Hat tip
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people discover the utility of cert
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supposed neighborhood. If someone t
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The safety advantage of online BDSM
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come back. It’s that much of a sh
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Chapter 6: The CollarWhat is a coll
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adornments such as rhinestones or m
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Types of CollarsA collar represents
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consideration are also collars of p
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vulnerable in BDSM environments tha
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consideration involves money or mer
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possibly be wrong with that? Well,
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submissive the ability to choose wh
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Your Collar, Your CommitmentIn this
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considered a yin and yang metaphor,
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Chapter 7: The Gorean WayThere are
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Gor novels from 1967 through the mi
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What is a Gorean?Devotees of the
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What Do Goreans Really Believe?If w
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The Gorean SlaveGorean slaves are c
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by raiding parties. They refer to t
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"Even though she had then been turn
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Rent Slave. A rent slave is a slave
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Categories of CollarsGorean merchan
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Page 187 and 188: Gor in Real World RelationshipsCont
Page 189 and 190: My Two Cents on GorI admit it. I’
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Page 193: with a submissive. He can choose to
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Page 208 and 209: First Meetings: Sheila’s StoryWhe
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Page 212 and 213: aka Slavemaster, lived with his wif
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Page 232 and 233: SleevesA BDSM sleeve is typically a
Page 234 and 235: order to escape smoke or fire.Harne
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Page 242 and 243: Impact GearBDSM impact gear is used
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Page 254 and 255: Piercing, Scarification & BrandingA
Page 256 and 257: bacterial soap, and use a fingernai
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Page 274 and 275: EMS stands for Electrical Muscle St
Page 276 and 277: body part the electrical current fl
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torsion is another serious risk tha
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subject. Anyone who has ever gotten
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When it comes to safety, irritants
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cotton swab on a wooden stick, simi
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Cupping should be avoided by people
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Hot WaxHot wax play isn’t just fo
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your artistic talents, or just enjo
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reigns, plumes, harnesses, spurs, a
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inexpensive, and may even already b
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BDSM FurnitureBDSM furniture is a t
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bottom’s buttocks prominently and
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used to restrain the hands and neck
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suddenly discover a phobia of being
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My Two Cents on BDSM ToysThe year w
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“I refuse to join any club that w
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names, to draw attention to this br
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which often consist of families wit
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At best, you’ll embarrass yoursel
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makes youuncomfortable, turn your a
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you should resist the temptation to
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concerned.Don’t use it as a place
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revisiting it here, in our discussi
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furnishings, such as racks, platfor
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their own towel to sit on if they
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to separate the wheat from the chaf
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lifestyle-friendly businesses.If do
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fact, exactly what he did.In a path
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Chapter 11: Sex, Love, D/s, & BDSMP
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see naked, anyway.”“Apparently,
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Mistaking Love for BDSMPeople confu
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porn, and Natalie promised to keep
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well.It is unfortunate that Ian and
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“This is crazy; seriously crazy!
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Mark pondered her words and her emo
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I think D/s is sexy.My Two Cents on
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“The more you love, the more you
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for their mother, or for that matte
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should be able to marry whomever th
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Francisco area from 1971 until 1991
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Attention.It’s often easy to assu
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Potential Pitfalls of a Poly Relati
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· Don’t introduce new partners i
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members of the household before you
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Even positive changes can result in
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We don’t feel the need to drop on
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of the group are considered to be m
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Polyfuckery. A derisive term used t
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It seriously just kills me that I s
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Chapter 13: D/s, BDSM, & ReligionIt
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D/s and Judaism: Could Lead to Mixe
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D/s and Islam: Keep Your Clothes On
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haram under Islamic law. For exampl
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Tantric Buddhism involves harnessin
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that would today be considered typi
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own personal spirituality. Even so,
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United States, one can find a wide
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without sex, it’s relatively comm
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is subject unto Christ, so let the
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Another of Jesus’ unconventional
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Filling a VoidI wrote this chapter
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I think religion in general has unf
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Chapter 14: What Could Possibly Go
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Possible insights ahead. Use ‘em,
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dysfunctional D/s relationships tha
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understand what she’s done wrong
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lifestyle, I could easily adopt a t
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and submissives, and even went into
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such cases certainly favors a train
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betrayed by the little dots at the
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A folk tale that is often used to i
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Role reversal is characterized by a
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church, the community at large, or
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from now? Some states have recently
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“No, Dad.” I replied, “Techni
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such statements, but this woman was
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and experiences, much less tell you
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Avoiding the Train WreckIt may seem
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Thank you so much!I thought about i
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Chapter 15: Rainbows & UnicornsThis
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not as much of a pervert as you mig
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My Two Cents on HappinessGuess what
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“When I use a word,” Humpty Dum
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scenarios involving coercion, humil
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the law typically takes a dim view
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a submissive, passive, receiving or
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Torture)Catheterization. Catheteriz
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revoked. Alternately, a submissive
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submissive. A day collar may consis
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Eloctrostimulation. (See Electricit
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Flogger. A small hand-held whip wit
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activity with a person of the oppos
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any kind of rape fantasy does not m
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Hair Pulling. Refers to being sexua
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Injection Play. Injection play refe
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refuse, subject to circumstances, p
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another on aspects of the D/s or BD
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play, Spanking)Painslut. The painsl
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consider such activity as “intima
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trait, while furryism is more a mat
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ramifications. This sort of play is
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(See also: BDSM, Masochism, Sadisti
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in it, since this is an activity th
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another’s, and sanity can be hard
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general categories. BDSM Switches a
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Torture. Torture refers to any sust
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role playing as pet and veterinaria
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Appendix B: Silly Shit Mike Makai S
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much else matters. No one asks why
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Appendix C: About the AuthorMichael
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