Domination & submission _ the BDSM relationship handbook ( PDFDrive )

Symbolism of the Collar
To most of the people in the BDSM lifestyle who assign meaning to a collar, it is
symbolic of ownership and represents a mutual commitment. It is usually the
degree of ownership and/or commitment that typically becomes a point of
contention in
BDSM relationships. For some, particularly in the online BDSM
community, a collar may be nothing more than a role-play accessory which has
no more significance than an imaginary sword used in World of Warcraft.
For others who may be living the lifestyle full-time in a real world setting, a
collar could represent something that – in terms of importance and level of
commitment - surpasses even marriage.
Since collars are entirely symbolic in nature to the people in this lifestyle, it is
extremely important that anyone considering entering into a relationship that
involves a collar, or even the possibility of a collar in the future, have a frank
discussion with his or her partner
about exactly what that collar symbolizes for everyone concerned.
Imagine the potential problems which are bound to occur in any relationship
where a Dominant believes the collar symbolizes absolute ownership requiring
unquestioning obedience from the wearer, while the submissive simply thinks of
it as a coveted status symbol or fashion accessory. Unfortunately, this
sort of thing happens all the time.
The actual, physical collars that are used by those in BDSM relationships, if they
are used at all, may consist of literally anything that is worn around the
submissive’s neck. For most people, the stereotypical collar generally conjures
images of a black leather pet-style collar with a buckle and D-rings; perhaps
even decorated with