August 2020 web (with links)

SUPPORTING
YOUR CHILD
IN TIMES
OF TRANSITION
by Denise Aden, MSW LISW Quad Cities Counseling
Children go through events
that cause anxiety just like
adults do. Returning to school
in the midst of a Pandemic
clearly creates anxiety for both
children and the adults who
care for them! Whether it’s
the death of a family member,
experiencing divorce of their
parents or changes like those
experienced during the current
Covid-19 pandemic, there are
many emotions and thoughts
children may experience.
Unlike adults, however, children
don’t always express emotions
or concerns as an adult might.
It can be harder for a child
to fully understand what they’re
feeling. So, they have a more
difficult time processing their
feelings and really working
through it.
While kids should be
allowed to experience grief,
8 August 2020 I QC Family Focus
loss or anxiety in their own
way, it’s a good idea to be
aware of signs like anger, fear,
or sadness. In some children,
their feelings may also be
“invisible” unless you openly
offer your help and support.
So, if you know your child
has been through a loss or
transition of some kind, how
can you support them while
they work through it?
Listen to Them
As their parent, one of your
biggest jobs during a transition
is to comfort your child. If your
child is old enough to fully
understand the change, listen
to what they have to say about
it. Ask them how it makes
them feel. Ask them if they’re
struggling with anything. Let
them know you’re there for
them no matter what and offer
reassurance.
Your child may cry. They
may want to show physical
affection. Or they may not
seem to show any kind of
emotion. Again, every child
handles change differently. As
long as they know you’re there
to support them, they can take
comfort in that.
Discuss Your Own Grief
If you’re going through the
same transition process as
your child, talk about it. For
example, if your child recently
lost their grandparent, you
could say something like, “I
know it hurts that Grandpa is
gone. I’ve been very sad about
it too.” Or, I know you are
missing seeing your friends at
school, I miss seeing friends
too.
When you’re willing to talk
about your feelings, your child
may be more likely to open