Spring 2017

GOT KIDNEY STONES?
Get thee to Big Thunder Mountain!
If you’ve ever had a kidney stone,
you will remember because it
brings with it an exquisite pain
that you would not want to wish
on your worst enemy. There are a
wide variety of treatments available,
including drinking lots of
water, medication, lithotripsy
and, in the most serious cases,
surgery. Now a new treatment is
being evaluated for efficacy: roller
coaster therapy.
There has apparently long been
anecdotal evidence connecting
roller coaster rides to passing of
kidney stones. Urologist David
Wartinger decided that the time
had come to run scientific trials
on the premise that a ride on a
roller coaster can assist sufferers
in passing their kidney stones. The
doctor and a colleague had their
findings published in the Journal of
the American Osteopathic Association
in an article entitled Validation
of a Functional Pyelocalyceal
Renal Model for the Evaluation
of Renal Calculi Passage While
Riding a Roller Coaster.
It would seem to be hard for the
lab-coated readers of the journal
article not to crack a smile or stifle
a giggle at the thought of a couple
of serious-minded urologists getting
in line at the Magic Kingdom
for ride after ride of the Big Thunder
Mountain Railway coaster with
a silicone model of a human kidney
filled with a handful of carefully
placed real kidney stones in a bath
of real urine, concealed in a backpack.
One can imagine the looks of
consternation aimed at a reader of
the journal in the middle a hospital
staff lunchroom who is trying desperately
to keep his composure,
only to burst out with an involuntary
guffaw when he comes upon
Figure 3 of the clinical essay, which
is a diagram showing which seats
on the coaster car yielded the best
results.
The paper concludes with the finding
that the ride does indeed facilitate
passing of the kidney stones
in the model, and that riders in the
hindmost car of the coaster enjoy
a benefit of nearly 5 times greater
than riders in the forward cars of
the coaster.
This is an actual illustration as it appeared in the medical journal showing the
best place to sit on the roller coaster to pass kidney stones
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