V2 N16

Page 62 Exit Zero
August 27, 2004 August 27, 2004 Exit Zero
Page 63
THE LOVE CROSSWORD
BY EMMA JANE TAYLOR AND ROB TOURTELOT
WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 18: MIDNIGHT IN THE BOILER ROOM
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Rolly Gray and Sunfire, performing at the Boiler Room every Wednesday
DJ with Carol and Duck Menz
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Charlie Antinori and Will Riccio Jason Williams and Cheryl Davies Patrick Swope and Maryl Roberts
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www.CrosswordWeaver.com
ACROSS
2. Gaylord Fokker makes
a less than stunning first
impression with his future inlaws
in this 2000 film.
7. If Governor McGreevey
decides to remarry, it’ll
probably have to be in this
state.
9. Fatal Attraction spawned
this term for a psycho ex,
striking fear in the hearts
of adulterous men and pet
rabbits alike.
10. If you’re going to take
on a 13 Across, you better
have an airtight one of these
(abbr.).
11. One theory posits that the
phrase “the whole nine yards”
originates from this wedding
dress attachment… it had
to be at least nine yards to
impress the Joneses.
12. Don’t envy the sultans for
this marital arrangement - it
probably just resulted in 20
women telling him to take out
the trash.
13. This decorative item is
usually 20 years younger than
the first woman you married,
and liked the “for richer” bit
of the wedding vow best.
16. This sport provides teens
the world over a way to score
their braggadocio… not to
mention something to think of
to avoid over-running home.
17. This ditzy pop starlet and
her hubbie spent the first year
of their marriage on camera
for an MTV reality show.
18. A Marilyn Monroe film
named for the urge to stray
from your spouse after, oh,
approximately 2555 days of
marital bliss.
20. Old school honeymoon
destination 509 miles north
of Cape May. We recommend
the view from the Canadian
side.
21. A man whose wife is
sharing more than sugar with
the neighbors.
22. One of the co-authors of
this how-to-catch-a-husband
manual (which included such
guidelines as not accepting
a Saturday night date after
Wednesday) recently got
divorced. Would that be
irony, or just bad for sales?
23. Sixty goats and an ox,
a.k.a. “Take my daughter, take
her, please!”
24. This 1989 romantic
comedy attempted to answer
the age-old question, can
men and women ever be just
friends?
DOWN
1. Tammy Wynette’s advice
for when nights are cold and
lonely was to stand by this.
3. The history of his nuptials
went something like this:
divorced, beheaded, died,
divorced, beheaded, survived.
4. More often than not, when
you show up for one of these,
you’ll wish your eyesight
actually WAS failing you.
5. After her recent, sudden
marriage to Marc Anthony,
she’s poised to become the
next Elizabeth Taylor (abbr.).
6. This Fox reality TV
show was a straight rip-off
of ABC’s Wife Swap - but
unfortunately for ABC, Fox
made it to air first.
8. Somewhere along the way,
the IRS must have decided
that two people can live more
cheaply than one, hence this
burden levied on those who
tie the knot rather than living
in sin.
12. “Yes, dear” is the favored
response of a [BLANK]
husband - one who has
decided to let his wife rule the
roost.
14. A large steel ball attached
to a crane… or the Other
Woman.
15. 750 million TV viewers
tuned in to watch this former
schoolteacher walk down the
aisle with her Prince in 1981.
19. According to the last of
the Ten Commandments,
when it comes to your
neighbor’s wife, thou shalt
not [BLANK] her.
Solution on Page 54
Relax. Refresh.
Invigorate. Beautify.
LEFT: Kathy
Hughes, Eileen
Elia, Ginnie
Butler, and
Beth Eastman
RIGHT: David
“eBay” Holland
PHOTOGRAPHS BY BRIAN MCMAHON
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