KALTBLUT-HONK! 03 The Divas

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asks himself in his book Gay and Single... Forever?
– He defines the borderline between desperate sex
addiction and becoming a kitsch gay cliché. Actually
on a gay night out in the German capital you can
see that this is the biggest fear everyone has - being
or becoming a gay cliché. That’s why they put ironic
glasses, hats and black T-shirts with names of death
metal bands on them. The trashier they look, the
cooler they are. For tourists and newcomers it’s like
a blessing - men are hairy, musky, masculine and not
overly manicured. In other words, “Not typically gay.”
Their music taste is going beyond Madonna and Kylie
(and yet not further than Robyn); their clothing tastes
beyond Abercrombie & Fitch (but not way higher
than American Apparel); their cultural interests
beyond Sex and The City or Queer as Folk (but not
further than RuPaul’s Drag Race). Another word for
this Berlin phenomenon is rooster, or a gay hipster. If
you don’t remember what my opinion on this breed
of species is - you can refresh your memory in HONK!
#1. And yet, this so-called alternative gay scene does
nothing else, but produce a new queer stereotype.
The beard. Usually in the gay ecosystem, the beard
is solely a distinctive feature or privilege of bears.
Bears tend to have hairy bodies and facial hair; some
are heavy-set or muscular; some project an image
of working-class masculinity in their grooming and
appearance, though none of these are requirements
or unique indicators. The bear cult is very prominent
in Berlin and Germany, but recently its’ main tokens
have become a deceitful cover for roosters. Most men
with beards you see in Berlin, are gay - except for
those you see in the ethnically diverse neighborhoods,
although Allah knows I know a couple of exceptions
there too. Thick, dark, ginger, thin, salt n’ pepper -
beards are everywhere. Hairy chests, armpits and
legs might be exciting to some US tourists, but their
owners don’t keep them flourishing because they like
themselves this way or they want to make a political
statement, but because it’s IN. That goes for the
whole “hairy man” cult, the infamous Gay Boys With
Beards website etc. In the end, right after they open
their mouth, you realize those guys are nothing more
than queens with beards.
It’s not all about being gay anymore. Sometimes
the gay scene in Berlin can be tiring. You go to
Cocktail D’Amore - you see the same people you saw
at Olfe; you go to Horse Meat Disco, you see the same
people from Cocktail; you go to Pet Shop Bears, you
see the same people from HMD; and then you go to
a gallery opening – and you see all of them all over
again. Going out and cruising, the alternative gay
scene is maybe one of the most boring experiences
that the city has to offer - at least most of the time.
I’m proud of my heterosexual friends. Actually this is
one of the very rare occasions to label them as such. I
love hanging out with them, going to other clubs and
bars that are not gay oriented. Back in the 1970s men
concealed that they were gay. Over the last decade
and a half, the AIDS virus transitioned from a death
sentence to largely treatable, and the gay culture
moved from the margins closer to the mainstream.
More than 40 years later we still segregate ourselves
from the society by going to gay-only parties or by
surrounding us only with queer friends (whom we
have mostly had some kind of bodily fluid exchange
with). Sorry, but this is more than aggravating. Today
homosexuals are restlessly hiding any hint of desperation
by trying way too hard and refusing to deal with
their fear of getting out of their comfort zone.
Larry Kramer, The Pulitzer-nominated playwright,
screenwriter, author and activist has been one of
the most controversial figures in American gay life
over the past 30 years. In 2005, he published “The
Tragedy of Today’s Gays,” a transcript of a speech in
which he attacked the younger generation of gay men
for their apathy over gay causes and accused them of
condemning their “predecessors to nonexistence.”
This might be true on one level. But, as Mr. Kramer
obviously addressed in his speech, I also felt obliged
to answer that his understanding of homosexuality is
giving me rash. In a recent interview Larry addresses
the recent development of integration and acceptance
of homosexuals as follows: “I am a gay person before
I’m anything else. I’m a gay person before I’m a white
person, before I’m a Jew, before I’m a writer, before
I’m American, anything. That is my most identifying
characteristic and I don’t find many people who
would say that.” Yes, since it’s 2011 we live in and evolution
of acceptance, which is not something bad and
does not automatically mean that all gays will become
housewives, marry rich businessmen and have three
kids in suburbia. The times where homosexuality
defined men and their whole life are past.
Whereas the discussion on those identity issues
belongs to the future. This is obviously a topic that
exceeds the 1200 words frame of REVENGE OF
THE NERDS. So if you have a thought or two on the
queens with beards, I’d be more than happy to chat...
or meet for coffee: cmitov@honkmag.de