South African Conversations sample articles

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CONVERSATiONS
Challenging the divide
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southafricanCONVERSATiONS
Challenging the divide
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South African
Conversations is a majority
Black-owned, social
entrepreneurial enterprise
on a mission to ease
the suffering caused by
unemployment, poverty and
marginalisation.
Our Vision
• A world free from poverty,
discrimination and socioeconomic
inequality.
• A world in which we, as
South Africans, respectfully
see ‘that of God’* in each
other.
• A world in which even the
‘least among us’ are visible,
able to sustain themselves
and access information and
opportunities that allow
their full participation in
society.
* Walk cheerfully over the
earth, answering that of God in
everyone. – A Quaker saying
Our Key Initiatives
• Community Conversations.
A platform for marginalised
voices.
• A monthly, printed
magazine. Solutions-based
journalism.
• A Resource Directory. A
printed toolbox of useful
information & resources.
All three initiatives offer
opportunities for skilled and
unskilled South Africans
to generate income for
themselves.
talk.to.us@southafrican
conversations.co.za
t. 021 300 0547
southafrican
CONVERSATiONS
SAMPLE CONTENT
5 Why print in the age of the Internet?
6 Our Rainbow Nation
10 The Plight of Our Students
12 Child Headed Households
13 Preparing for Your Death
15 How to Start a Food Garden
16 Edible Weeds & Wild Plants
20 The Cultural Context of Greetings
22 How About Learning My Language?
24 The Rubbish Bin Scavengers
28 Everything You Need to Know About
Recycling
32 Because My Mouth is Wide with Laughter ...
33 Maids & Madams: Know Your Rights ... And
Obligations
34 Respect for Life Starts with Respect for All
Living Things
34 The Frightening Link Between Animal Abuse
and Human Violence
36 Crisis Pregnancy: What are the Options?
38 Grandmothers Holding Families Together
All Over South Africa
40 Dictionary
3

I TAKE
THE PLEDGE!
TO NEVER
USE MY HANDS OR MY WORDS
TO HURT ANYONE ... IN REAL LIFE
OR ON SOCIAL MEDIA.
TO NEVER REMAIN SILENT
ABOUT ANY FORM OF VIOLENCE
OR DISCRIMINATION.
Photo | Womanizer-Unsplash
TO STOP AND THINK
BEFORE I DO, SAY OR POST ANYTHING
THAT COULD HURT ANYONE
BECAUSE I KNOW HOW VULNERABLE
WE ALL ARE.
Buy the poster at www.southafricanconversations.co.za/shop

:
southafrican CONVERSATiONS
sample content 5
Printing is on the decline
the world over as a direct
result of the accessibility of
information on the Internet.
Those who can afford it and
know how to navigate their
way around the World Wide
Web have unfettered access
to this vast and liberating
storehouse of knowledge
and information – giving
them a distinct advantage
when it comes to exploring
opportunities, developing
their potential and finding
solutions to problems.
But there’s a problem: over
16 million South Africans
don’t use the internet at all,
and the majority of those
who do only have access at
work, malls and cafés, with
limited access to free sites
and social media platforms
at home.
This discrepancy is primarily
caused by poor or no
reception, intermittent or no
electricity, and the high cost
of data.
Even if we achieved
100% accessible internet
coverage, cultural isolation
and a lack of knowledge
on how to search for
information online would
remain significant barriers
to achieving equal access to
information.
Besides, solutions to
problems experienced by
poor people are fragmented
and not easily accessible –
even online.
Consequently, many
marginalised people are
oblivious to the help,
services, solutions and
options available to them.
As the world’s knowledge
increasingly moves online,
access to information
will become the biggest
obstacle to equality and
development in South
Africa.
That’s why we print.
Another reason why we
print is that our magazine
is an important source
of income generation for
unemployed people, and
for the NPOs that supply
magazines for them to sell.
If you’d like to know more
about this initiative, watch
this short movie.
But make no mistake: all of
our publications speak to all
South Africans: those who
are struggling, as well as
those who aspire to make a
difference, including
businesses and policymakers.
Knowledge has power.
It controls access to opportunity and advancement.
– Peter Drucker
Join us in our mission to
bridge the growing divide
between those who have
access to information and
opportunities, and those
who do not.
We offer many
opportunities for mutuallybeneficial
collaboration.
Theresa Muller
talk.to.us@
southafricanconversations.
co.za or call us on
0860 333 034
why print in the age of the Internet?

6
Our nation
rainbow
None of us are the stereotypes described here, yet most of us will recognise a bit of ourselves somewhere on these pages.
Older generation
returned expatriates
They are mostly Black, Indian and
Coloured: former freedom fighters
and returned political exiles.
They are worldly, experienced and
sophisticated – even if not formally
educated.
They are politicised and angry about
white entitlement, bigotry, racism,
condescension and lack of knowledge
about the rest of society.
They are intimately familiar with the
plight of marginalised people.
The international generation
They are the children of mostly Black
former political exiles or they grew
up, normally, in affluent areas in postapartheid
South Africa.
They are sassy, well-educated, well-read
and often well-travelled.
They are at ease engaging outside familiar
racial and cultural boundaries and have
diverse social circles.
Many are leaving South Africa because of
frustration with crime and discrimination,
Photo: Henri Meilhac
and in pursuit of better economic
opportunities.
They are annoyed by white condescension
and the automatic assumption that being
Black equates to poverty and lack of
education.
They may not understand the true depth
of the plight of marginalised people in
South Africa, because they did not
grow up in it.
They are annoyed by the
automatic assumption that
Black equates poverty and
lack of education.
Those who stayed behind,
but got educated in spite
of apartheid
Black professionals – the lucky few who
made up apartheid’s quota of Black people
who were allowed to get an education.
They are intimately familiar with the plight
of their own people.
Most are supporting extended,
marginalised families.
Many are involved with volunteer work
trying to make a difference through faithbased
or community-based organisations.
They are not necessarily politicised, are
often accepting of the status quo and are
eager to fit in with White people at work or
church – not considering the loss of their
own cultural identity in this process.
Despite their qualifications, there is a self-

southafrican CONVERSATiONS
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7
imposed and historically imposed
‘glass ceiling’ beyond which
many find it difficult to move –
especially in the presence of
White professionals.
the government – because of its
promises – and especially White
people – because of the history
of apartheid and because White
people are perceived as being
rich.
Educated, young people
of colour who were
raised in South Africa
They are the new generation of
young people who have had
access to education and other
post-apartheid opportunities.
Many of them rose out of terrible
disadvantage to achieve their
ambitions.
They are intimately familiar with the
plight of their own people and most
are supporting extended families.
They are positive, hopeful and want
to help make a difference.
Even if not completely at ease, they
are eager to engage outside familiar
racial and cultural boundaries –
often at a loss of their own
cultural identity.
They are often not treated as
professional equals by Whites
in the workplace.
They are often not
treated as professional
equals by whites in the
workplace.
Emerging historically
disadvantaged
South Africans
They are mostly Black, skilled bluecollar
workers and artisans, new to
the South African workforce.
They often struggle to make ends
meet. A large proportion of their
salaries are for family maintenance
responsibilities. Many are
supporting extended families.
They are very familiar with limited
access to services.
They are frustrated with unfulfilled
promises made by NGOs and
government departments.
They are intimately familiar with the
complex challenges faced by Black
communities.
They are willing to contribute in any
way possible to help make things
better for their people.
On the whole, they have little
decision-making power in the
world of work.
They want to move away from what
has held them back in the past …
desperately trying to hide the other
reality in their lives: the reality not
known or shared by White people.
They often spend disproportionate
amounts of money on clothes,
shoes, handbags, jewellery,
accessories and cars to keep
up appearances.
They sometimes have a sense
of entitlement, a culture of ‘the
world owes me.’ That world is
Marginalised
South Africans
The millions of poor South Africans
who live lives of quiet desperation
– who have given up hope of ever
bridging the widening rift between
rich and poor, educated and
uneducated in South Africa.
They are mostly Black and coloured,
though increasing numbers of
White people are becoming
marginalised.
They are people of all ages in
positions of domestic responsibility
– including orphans left to fend for
themselves and their siblings.
They are unemployed or employed
in menial jobs, homeless or living in
poverty in townships, city centres,
abandoned buildings, building sites,
informal settlements and rural
areas.
They are affected by all the social
ills associated with poverty and
marginalisation, such as alcohol
and substance abuse, illiteracy,
malnutrition, prostitution and
neglect.
They have little access to
information and are often unaware
of the extent of social programming
Photo: Jan Truter | flickr

8
southafrican CONVERSATiONS
sample content
Charisse Kenion
initiatives and other support
services available to them.
They are unable to participate in
the formal economy for a variety of
reasons, such as lack of education,
lack of skills, transportation,
money, confidence, know-how
and, simply, lack of precedent.
Ill health, disability and old age
may also prevent them from active
participation.
They are frustrated, sceptical and
wary because of what they perceive
as unfulfilled development promises
made by the government.
They believe that the government
doesn’t care about them.
They are illiterate, semi-literate or
literate, and mostly uneducated.
They have little disposable income
and few prospects.
Many are without hope.
The takers
People who have become wealthy
by questionable means. They are
more concerned with what they
can take from the system than
what they can give to it. There is
little regard for ethics or culture.
They behave ostentatiously and
often spend exorbitant amounts of
money on booze and bling. Making
money seems to be a game of how
best to cheat the system, not of
hard work and integrity.
Old-school historically
advantaged people
Mostly White South Africans who
believe, deep down, that the ending
of apartheid was a mistake.
They used to blame the victims of
poverty for lack of incentive, lack of
willpower, laziness, stupidity and all
the stereotypes that are attached
to people who are marginalised
– until their own joined the ranks
of the poor. Now they blame the
government.
They see no connection between
crime and the fact that economic
inequality is higher in South Africa
than anywhere else in the world.
They believe in their intrinsic
intellectual superiority and they look
down on other races. They believe
that they earned what they have
because of their hard work and
contributions to the world.
They rarely consider the enormous
benefit and advantage bestowed
upon them and their families by
the years of white affirmative action
during apartheid.
They have access to quality
employment, health care, services,
information and opportunities.
Their jobs are protected by a circle
of their own: like-minded family,
friends and colleagues.
They live lives of privilege and
entitlement. They have stereotypical
ideas of what Black people are like
and expect Blacks who want to
associate with them to conform to
their norms of behaviour, dress,
speech and culture.
They would find it inconceivable
to visit a township, let alone an
informal settlement and believe,
on some level, that people who live
in poverty deserve what they get,
because of their inability to rise
above their circumstances.
They see no connection between
the policies of the past and Black
poverty now. They want Black
people to ‘move on’ because
apartheid is over, after all.
They see no connection between
the low and discriminatory wages
they pay the people who support
them in maintaining their lifestyle,
and the difficulties those people
experience in rising above their
circumstances.
They are negatively critical of the
government and regard many of its
policies as unfair, ill-advised assaults
on their way of life.
They and their children are negative
about prospects in South Africa and
invariably believe that the situation
is hopeless. Leaving the country is
perpetually an option.
Liberal historically
advantaged people
White South Africans who believe
that apartheid was an iniquity that
marred our economic development,
scarred a lot of people, divided a
nation, and left us with horrible
problems.

southafrican CONVERSATiONS
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9
They are saddened by the past and
want to see our country change
and heal.
They are mostly educated and
have access to quality employment,
health care, ample services and
information, and participate actively
in the formal economy.
They may be affluent or not, but
they live lives of relative privilege
because they know no other way
of living.
They mix freely with educated
people of colour who fit into their
socio-economic group. Yet, they are
mostly unaware of what life is like
for those who are truly marginalised
as a result of the racial policies of
the past.
They are critical, but positive about
prospects in South Africa.
They would like to help make a
difference – but they are unsure
about how to get involved beyond
mixing with people of colour who
fit into their world.
Historically advantaged
blue-collar South Africans
White blue-collar workers and
artisans who took for granted the
affirmative protections afforded
them by apartheid, who now have
to compete for jobs and services
against people who were previously
excluded from meaningful
participation in the formal economy.
Many struggle to make ends meet.
A large proportion of their salaries
go towards family responsibilities.
Many, but not all, are now
supporting unemployed members
of their family.
Many are resentful of Black people
taking ‘their’ jobs.
They still have a say at their
places of work because of the
ease of interaction in a world still
dominated by unspoken white
rules.
Photo: William Krause
Kind White people who
never questioned the
status quo
White South Africans who were
born into apartheid but didn’t
necessarily consider themselves
superior – just different. They never
questioned why Black people live in
poverty on one side of town, while
White people lived in decent houses
and sent their children to school on
the other side of town. They never
made the connection between the
policies of apartheid and the way
things were. They have a hard time
redefining themselves and making
sense of the guilt that comes
with awareness of what has really
happened here.
The unclassifiables
A large group of South Africans
(and foreigners) that transcends
stereotypical categories.
This group is comprised of people
from all economic and racial
backgrounds … ordinary people
who believe that a better world
is possible. Many are involved
in social transformation work
… in government departments,
international and local aid
organisations and charities,
and in community and faithbased
projects.
Also in this group, are many of the
younger generation who have had
the privilege of discovering the
common humanity of people from
all races with whom they went
to school.
They don’t know about the pain and
division caused by apartheid and
they frankly don’t care. They just
want to get on with their lives and
participate in a world that works.
They don’t want to be punished
for the sins of their fathers or be
branded by their labels.
Many have had the privilege of discovering the
common humanity of people from all races.
Photo: Zachary Nelson

10
southafrican CONVERSATiONS
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The plight of our student’s
Growing up we were told
that it’s only lazy people who
become failures in life. Any
form of failure was attributed
to a lack of discipline and
willpower or low intelligence.
But during my time at
university, I saw and
experienced a different reality.
I lived far away and it took
me at least two hours every
morning to get to campus, by
taxi. By the time I arrived, I was
tired and in desperate need of
rest or food or both. I lived so
far from campus because
accommodation close to
campus was very
expensive, and the
available and more
affordable places were
rowdy, overcrowded and
uninhabitable. So, like
many others, I opted to
live with relatives closest
to campus.
Another ramification
of the distance I lived
from campus was that I
invariably had to leave
halfway through the
last lecture of the
day to catch the last
taxi home. Thank
goodness I had a
laptop otherwise I
would have had to
spend lunch breaks
typing my assignments at the
crowded computer labs, and have
to leave home as early as 4 am to
get some Internet usage before
classes started. I know many
students who do exactly that.
Student dropout rates in South
Africa are alarmingly high:
between 50 to 60% among firstand
second-year students. The
majority of these students cite
financial problems as the reason
for dropping out. But it is not just
money ... Here is the story of a
friend of mine, Pule (not his real
name), that offers a glimpse at
the complex challenges faced by
those who drop out.
Pule came to Johannesburg
from a small town in the Free
State. He never knew his father,
and his mother was a domestic
worker. Even so, Pule’s matric
results qualified him for university
entrance and he managed to
get some financial aid, but not
enough for accommodation on
or off-campus.
He ended up living with one of
his aunts about 35 km away for
the duration of his studies. This
meant that he had to get up at
4 am every morning to iron the
clothes he washed a night or
two before, make breakfast and
sandwiches for lunch, and walk
20 minutes to where he could
catch a taxi. The commute to the
city routinely took as long as two
hours, and sometimes longer if
the taxi waited to fill up before it
would leave. If there were
no delays, Pule would arrive
on campus around 7:30 am —
perpetually exhausted and under
pressure to perform academically,
so that he could hopefully qualify
for a scholarship. Some days,
especially towards the end of the
month, Pule would arrive hungry,
because there was very little to
eat at his aunt’s house.
by Andrew Tlou
Photo | Shunya
Koide | Unsplash

southafrican CONVERSATiONS
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11
On the other side of town, another friend,
Joe (not his real name), would wake up
around 6 am, grab an energy bar and head
to the gym in the comfort of the nippy
little car his parents bought for him when
he matriculated. After gym he would head
home for a tasty and nutritious breakfast,
a shower and something nice to wear from
the neatly ironed brand-name clothes in his
wardrobe. He would leave home around
7.30 am to get to the first class of the day
— on time and with no worries or stress
other than having to navigate the traffic
to campus. On the passenger seat would
be a lunch box filled with delicious brain
food which he often took home, unopened,
because he went out for lunch with his
friends, instead.
Pule often skipped lunch so that he could
use the library and its Internet facility
during the day. Sometimes he had to
choose between the library and a lecture
because there was always the possibility of
missing the last taxi home.
Joe could stay at the library as long as he
wanted … or go home to access the Internet
at home at any hour of the day or night.
He had never experienced real hunger,
because there was always money in his
pocket to buy something, somewhere.
Joe’s parents were not only able to back him
financially, but they were also emotionally
available to provide support, love and
companionship.
Pule’s aunt, on the other hand, resented
the extra mouth to feed, and continuously
reminded Pule not to think that he’s better
than the rest of the family because he goes
to university.
Pule retreated to the room he shared with
two cousins as soon as he arrived home.
He worked on a corner of his bed until
someone would call him to come and eat.
Or not.
Life
is
a
dream
for
the
wise,
a
game
for
the
fool,
a
comedy
for
the
rich,
a
tragedy
for
the
poor.
– Sholom
Aleichem
There was no Internet and
sometimes, towards the end of
the month, no electricity. There
were other, gnawing stresses, too.
Like his deteriorating eyesight,
his malfunctioning second-hand
laptop ...
Both friends eventually graduated.
It took both one year longer. Pule
because he had to stop at the end
of his second year to earn some
money. Joe, because he changed
his mind about his area of study.
Students from less privileged
backgrounds are often chided for
their “lack of commitment”. Yet
few of those who do the chiding
realise the burdens, stresses and
difficulties that many of these
students carry alone.
Pule’s situation was not as bad
as some of the students I met
who were ‘living’ in libraries or
anywhere they could find shelter
on campus.
I also witnessed some heartbreaking
situations where bright,
capable students were refused
permission to continue unless
outstanding fees were paid.
Poverty has many spill-over
effects. Many students are
excluded from re-enrollment
because of poor academic
performance. Academic exclusion,
in most cases, is final and no
one cares to hear about the
circumstances that lead to such an
unfavourable assessment. n

12
southafrican CONVERSATiONS
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Photo: John Prere
“My father passed away when Thabo was two. I was nine. I didn’t mind that he
died, because we didn’t see him very much. But when I was older I saw that it was
because of him that we always had food and things, which we didn’t have after he
died. I mean, we had food. But not so much meat. My mother planted mealies and
morogo and we had the cow, so we had milk. My mother started working for the
farmer with the big house. She worked in the fields. She would leave when it was
still dark and come home when it was dark. And she became so thin. So thin. And
weak. And then she couldn’t work any more. She got the sickness. So, I left school
to take care of her and Bongani left school to take her place at the farm. Only
Tshepo and Jabu are at school now. I know she is going to die. My mother. I will be
the father then because I am the oldest. I am fourteen years.” – Albert

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13
What would I do if I were Albert?
By Moshe Lecheko
If my parents were dying or had
died and I was the oldest of
four siblings, I would have the
responsibility of looking after the
family when my parents are gone.
If it were me, here’s what I’d do:
I would start by talking with the
counsellors in my community.
They will know what resources
are available and will tell me
how to contact these.
I would talk with the people at
the clinic to find out of there
is anything we need to do. For
instance, we may need to get
ourselves tested for HIV.
I would meet with the
headmaster of our school and
tell him what is happening and
ask for his advice.
I would talk with social workers
and join any local support
groups for children of dying
parents.
I would ask my parents about
everything I need to know about.
Like where they keep papers for
the house, our birth certificates,
our school certificates, family
members to contact, and so on.
I would ask for an opportunity
to talk to the elders in my family.
I would prepare my siblings and
myself psychologically.
I would commit myself to doing
everything I can to ensure that
my siblings and I are educated
because it is through education
that we will be able to live a
better and more meaningful life.
I believe that through drawing
collectively on the support
systems and structures that
are already in place, however
informally, I – as a vulnerable
or orphaned child — will still
be able to live a more or less
normal life.
Everything I do must
strengthen and not disrupt what
will be left of my family, for
without the love, support and
shared existence of a family, it
would be difficult to grow up, to
know who we are, to learn the
traditions, morals and values of
our culture and to conform to
the broader society.
It is not the absence of the
resource that is a problem; it is the
ability to find, access and utilise
the available resources that is the
problem. There is a lot of support
for orphans. I believe our people
cannot always utilise the available
resources that are at their
disposal. So, if it were me, I would
ask questions until I understand
what help is available.
Preparing for
your death
It sounds odd but it will be
a gift and a lifeline to your
children. Here’s what you
MUST do to safeguard their
emotional, physical and
financial future.
1. Talk about your illness, about
death, and about what will
happen when you are gone.
2. Make memories together.
Spend time doing things that you
love together.
3. Prepare a will. Verbal
instructions do not hold up
in a court of law. Download a
free template of a will from the
Internet. Or ask a lawyer or other
clever person to help you. Get
witnesses to sign the will, make
copies and get a Commissioner of
oaths to certify that they are true
copies. Give copies to your older
children, close family members,
guardians and community
leaders.
4. Appoint guardians to take care
of your children after your death.
Reach out and involve them in
your family life already.
5. Get your and your children’s
papers in order. Birth certificates,
identity documents, grant
applications, property ownership
rights, access to bank accounts,
etc. Make sure that at least two
trusted adults, as well as your
oldest children, know exactly what
is involved, where the papers are
kept and what the passwords are,
if any. n

14
southafrican CONVERSATiONS
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The cultural context of
A friend tells the charming
story of his aged father
arriving in Durban to visit
one of his sons. As they
walk down a busy street,
the old man stops every
few seconds and asks
people how they are. The
son very quickly has to
intervene and educate his
father:
‘This is the city, father. There
are too many people here to
greet. You greet only those
you know, not the ones you
don’t know.’
It was an incomprehensible
rudeness that the old man
just couldn’t get used to.
The same old man sold
his horse to a young man
in their rural community.
After a couple of days the
young man stopped by
to enquire: ‘Why does the
horse come to a standstill
whenever we approach
someone?’
‘To greet and enquire about
the other’s life, of course,’
the old man replied.
The horse had absorbed
the old man’s way of life
and did not even have to
be prompted to stop and
be civil to the people of
that community.

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15
TRING-TRING-TRING ...
ANSWER: Hello. This is
Deidre.
REPLY: Hello, how are you?
ANSWER: (mildly irritated)
Fine, thank you. Who are
you?
This is a relatively common
exchange between black
and white people in South
Africa.
For many black people,
the question ‘How are you?
(Kunjani? / O kae?)’ is the
only respectful way to start
a conversation.
This civility is inherent in
most African languages
and cultures. To start
with the purpose of your
call would be offensively
impolite. For instance,
one would not dream of
simply saying ‘Dumela’.
The greeting will always be
followed by the question:
‘O phela jwang?’ which
literally means, ‘How is
your life?’ — reminiscent
of an era when people still
had time to engage with
one another.
To the white person, the
question feels like an
intrusion: ‘You don’t know
who I am and you haven’t
even announced yourself,
how can you ask me how
I am?’ She wants to first
know who you are and
what the purpose of your
call is, before engaging in
small talk with you.
When there is
understanding it is
possible to not only
tolerate and accept our
differences, but to respect
the other’s behaviour.

16
southafrican CONVERSATiONS
sample content
HOW ABOUT LEARNING MY
Everything can change, but not the
language that we carry inside us,
like a world more exclusive and final
than one’s mother’s womb.
– Italo Calvino. Writer, Essayist, Journalist
Photo: Heidi Sheppard
There are about 6,000 languages spoken in the
world.* Ninety five percent of these languages
are spoken by only four percent of the world’s
population. Across the world an average of two
languages die out each month. That is why,
in 1999, UNESCO proclaimed February 21 as
International Mother Language Day.
Language is the most powerful instrument we
have to preserve our cultural wealth and our
diverse cultural heritage. The day is celebrated
around the world, annually, to promote
dialogue among different cultures and people,
and to foster mutual understanding and
respect for all cultures.
* UNESCO’s ‘Atlas of the World Languages in Danger of Disappearing’.
And did you know that, in spite of major
opposition, Madiba insisted on including
‘Die Stem’ in the National Anthem of the new
South Africa, signifying respect for all races and
cultures and the dawning of an all-inclusive
new era for South Africa.
Are you one of those people who keep quiet
during the verses of the Anthem that is not in
your mother tongue?
We’d like to challenge you to learn to sing the
National Anthem of South Africa and get to
know what the words mean, too.
The lyrics and the translation of each non-
English verse is on the opposite page.
s
s

southafrican CONVERSATiONS
sample content
17
Every month we’ll give you two or more words to learn in all our official languages. Here’s how to
say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’. Ask a friend or a co-worker to teach you how to pronounce the words.
Try, at least, to master those words that belong to the languages that are spoken where you live.
LANGUAGE PREDOMINANT IN WORDS
English Western Cape Please Thank you
Afrikaans Northern Cape Asseblief Dankie
IsiNdebele
(Ndebele)
Sesotho sa Leboa
(Pedi – or Northern Sotho)
Sesotho
(Sotho – or Southern Sotho)
Mpumalanga Ngiyabawa Ngiyathokoza
Limpopo Ka kgopelo Ke a leboga
Free State Ke a kopa Ke a leboha
Setswana North West Province Ke kopa Ke a leboga
Xitsonga Limpopo Ndza kombela Inkomu
Tshivenda Limpopo Nga khumbelo Ndo livhuwa / Ro
IsiXhosa Eastern Cape Nceda Enkosi
IsiZulu KwaZulu-Natal Ngicela Ngiyabonga
SiSwati Mpumalanga Ngiyacela Siyabonga
You can learn to speak all 11 of our official languages, as well as South African sign language,
free of charge, online, at https://play.google.com ... Click on Apps, then type the name of the
language you would like to learn into the search bar.
s
s
(Xhosa) Nkosi sikelel’ iAfrika
Maluphakanyisw’ uphondo lwayo,
(Zulu) Yizwa imithandazo yethu,
Nkosi sikelela, thina lusapho lwayo.
(Sotho) Morena boloka setjhaba sa heso,
O fedise dintwa le matshwenyeho,
O se boloke, O se boloke setjhaba sa heso,
Setjhaba sa, South Afrika, South Afrika.
(Afrikaans) Uit die blou van onse hemel,
Uit die diepte van ons see,
Oor ons ewige gebergtes,
Waar die kranse antwoord gee,
(English) Sounds the call to come together,
And united we shall stand,
Let us live and strive for freedom
In South Africa our land.
Translation
God [Lord] bless Africa
Raise high its glory
Hear our prayers
God bless us, her children
God, we ask You to protect our nation
Intervene and end all conflicts
Protect us, protect our nation, our
nation,
South Africa - South Africa
Out of the blue of our heavens,
Out of the depths of our seas,
Over our everlasting mountains,
Where the echoing crags resound ...

18
southafrican CONVERSATiONS
sample content
THE
RUBBISH BIN
SCAVENGERS
One young man’s experience
I am sitting here by the street,
because I have no job. I told
my mother that I will get a job,
but eish, I have been here for
so long and every night I go
back home with no job. I think
people don’t want to use me
because I look too young. The
older men, they get jobs.
Sometimes it rains, sometimes
it is very cold. Sometimes I
get hungry. Then I go and beg
at that robot. But those guys
there, that’s their robot. They
don’t want me to stand there.
On Tuesdays I dig the rubbish
bins. There are many people
doing that. 20 to 30 in each
place. It is difficult to get in.
That old man there, he took me
the first time. So the others,
they accepted me. Sometimes
you get nice things. And
sometimes you get food. Then
we take all the stuff to the
recycle and the others we sell
at home. One day I made R79
from the rubbish at the recycle.
My mother is a domestic. She
can’t pay for me to come here
every day. So I walk here from
Diepsloot every morning. It is
bad. I don’t want to go home,
because everyone is hungry.
I got a piece-job last year.
I worked the garden. But the
people went on holiday in
December and they didn’t tell
me. So, when I got there, I had
wasted the transport and I had
no transport back because they
would pay me that day.

southafrican CONVERSATiONS
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19
That was the first time I sit here
by the side of the road. At the
end of the day I walked all the
way to Diepsloot.
I was hungry and it rained hard.
When I got home my mother
cried. Even though the money
was small, at least I was getting
food while I was working there.
I walked there one day to see
if they were back, but there was
nobody there.
Photo: Mélina Huet. Assistant: Nkosazana Teyise

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southafricanCONVERSATiONS

No matter which side of the divide you live in,
we’d love to hear from you!
Photo of HOUTBAY / IMIZAMO YETHU South Africa © Johnny Miller | www.UnequalScenes.com
We pay R2 per published word
and R200 per published photograph.
talk.to.us@southafricanconversations
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south
african
CONVER
SATiONS
Challenging
the divide

22
southafrican CONVERSATiONS
sample content
Photo: iStock
Because my mouth
Is wide with laughter
And my throat
Is deep with song,
You do not think
I suffer after
I have held my pain
So long?
Because my mouth
Is wide with laughter,
You do not hear
My inner cry?
Because my feet
Are gay with dancing,
You do not know
I die?
– Minstrel Man by Langston Hughes, Black American poet

Maids & madams
southafrican CONVERSATiONS
sample content
Know your rights!
An employee who is registered with the Unemployment Insurance Fund (UIF), would be able
to claim the following benefits should they lose their job: • Financial support equivalent
to 15 days’ worth of pay • Registration as a work-seeker with the Department of Labour •
Free training and counselling • Benefits for their children. • And more.
So, please do the necessary to protect the people who work for you. You can do it all over the phone
or online. Call 012 337 1680 between 8 am to 6.30 pm on weekdays, and between 8 am to 12 noon
on Saturdays. Or write to domestics@uif.gov.za or go to http://www.labour.gov.za and search for
‘unemployment-insurance-fund-uif/ document’. Or contact the Department of Labour or a Labour Centre
near you. Failure to register a domestic worker for UIF – even if she works for only 24 hours a month
– could land you a hefty fine and even jail time.
... and do the right thing.
23
If you are a ‘madam’
First of all, recognise that you are a
just a human being – just like your
‘maid’. Be kind. Be fair.
Go to www.labour.gov.za and search
for ‘domestic workers’. You’ll find the
basic laws that govern employment,
plus a whole lot of very useful
information specific to domestic
workers.
You may not know, for instance, that
if you expect your domestic worker to
work outside her normal, contracted
hours, you must pay her 1.5 times the
normal rate on Saturdays, and double
the normal rate on Sundays.
If her work-day falls on a public
holiday, you must pay her for the day,
but she is not required to work that
day. If she does, you must pay her for
the holiday and for working. And don’t
grunt at this. What would YOU do if
your boss refuses to pay you for the
public holidays in a month?
And you cannot not pay your
domestic worker because YOU
went away on the day that she was
supposed to work.
You also cannot fire her without giving
her at least three written warnings
and discussing what behaviour you
want her to change. Even then, you
have to give her four weeks’ written
notice, or one week’s written notice
if she has worked for you for less
than six months. You must then pay
severance pay equivalent to one
week’s salary for each year that she
has worked for you.
If you are a ‘maid’
First of all, recognise that you are a
human being – just like your ‘madam’.
Be kind. Be fair. And insist on your
rights.
1. It is within your rights to ask
your employer for a contract of
employment and for proof of
registration with the Unemployment
Insurance Fund (UIF). This is your
protection in case you become
unemployed.
2. Learn about your rights and
obligations at www.sadsawu.com – It
is the South African Domestic Service
and Allied Workers’ Union. You can
contact SADSAWU in Johannesburg:
011 331 1001 and in Cape Town: 021
448 0045.
3. If you have a dispute with your
employer and need advice, contact
the Department of Labour in Pretoria
on 012 309 4000 for information
about a Labour office near you. Or
find relevant contact information at
www.labour.gov.za/DOL/contacts
4. If you have been unfairly
dismissed, contact the Commission
for Conciliation, Mediation &
Arbitration (CCMA) on their toll-free
number: 0861 16 16 16 or write to:
complaints@ccma.org.za There is a
lot of useful information on their site:
www.ccma.org.za The Commission
listens to both parties in a dispute
and helps them reach an amicable
and fair solution in accordance with
the law.
5. If you have been unfairly treated
and you can’t get help anywhere,
contact the Black Sash for free
paralegal support and advice on their
free helpline: 072 66 33 739 or write
to them at help@blacksash.org.za
Black Sash works to empower
marginalised people to speak for
themselves.
www.blacksash.org.za

24
southafrican CONVERSATiONS
sample content
Respect
for life
starts
with respect
for all
living things
What it took to become
a Nazi SS Officer
It is alleged that at the beginning
of their training each SS officer in
Nazi Germany received a dog – the
only living thing they were allowed
to be close and affectionate with.
Unbeknownst to these young
officers, their training would be
concluded only once they had
murdered this close friend – coldbloodedly
and in obedience to
an unexpected request from the
training officer. Unable to kill the
dog, the trainee was not allowed to
graduate to the status of SS officer.
This fanatical exercise seems to
have been designed to empty the
individual of all tender concern for
life. Able to kill his closest friend
of many months, the officer was
assumed able to kill any living
creature without remorse.
It is conventional wisdom that animal abuse
precedes human violence. In reality, the two are
often co-occurring and interwoven. Domestic
abusers may harm or threaten animals to exert
power over their human victims, to show what
might happen to them, and to prevent victims from
leaving or speaking about their abuse.
When understood as part of a dynamic of violence, animal abuse
cases present an opportunity to intervene and break the cycle.
Domestic violence victims are generally reluctant to speak to
outsiders about their abuse, but may more easily talk about what
has happened to their pets. Likewise, outsiders will more readily
report animal cruelty than suspicions of domestic violence. Since
animal abuse is often the ‘tip of the iceberg’ for family violence,
criminal behaviour and substance abuse, animal agencies have the
opportunity to serve as first responders for families in crisis.
‘It is evident that if a man practices a pitiful affection
for animals, he is all the more disposed
to take pity on his fellow-men.’
– St Thomas Aquinas
The frightening link
between animal abuse
and human violence
Respect for life – respect for all
living creatures – has long been the
supreme principle of civilisation.
‘If you have men who will
exclude any of God’s creatures from
the shelter of compassion and pity,
you will have men who
will deal likewise with their fellow
men.’ – St. Francis of Assisi
Photo: iStock

southafrican CONVERSATiONS
25
sample content
When people are violent and cruel
towards animals, everyone is at risk.
In recognition of the link between cruelty to animals
and the abuse of women, children and the elderly,
the US FBI has been tracking cases of animal abuse
independently since 2016.
[Source: www.thelinknm.com ]
Here’s what the research shows:
v 70% of animal abusers have criminal records.
v 50% of schoolyard shooters have histories of
animal cruelty.
v 82% of offenders arrested for animal abuse had
prior arrests for battery or drug charges.
v 70% of people charged with cruelty to animals
were known by police for other violent acts.
v Animal abuse is a better predictor of sexual
assault than convictions for homicide, arson, or
firearms. Animal cruelty offenders committed
an average of four different types of criminal
offences, with sexual assault, domestic violence
and firearms offences figuring prominently in
their criminal histories.
v 76% of animal abusers also abuse a family
member according to the Association of
Prosecuting Attorneys.
v In a 2001 study by the US Humane Society, twothirds
of animal abuse cases also involved abuse
of a child.
v Children exposed to domestic violence were
three times more likely to be cruel to animals.
v One-third of battered women reported that their
children had hurt or killed animals.
v In one-third of families investigated for child
abuse, the children had also abused animals.
v Children who were sexually abused were five
times more likely to abuse animals.
v Up to three-quarters of animal cruelty happens
in the home occurs in front of children.
Witnessing animal cruelty as a child was found to
be the single biggest predictor of future violence,
making children 8 times more likely to be violent.
v A study of battered women found that nearly
three-quarters reported that their abuser had
hurt or threatened to hurt a pet; more than half
said he had actually done it.
v An assessment used by US law enforcement
lists the top three indicators that a woman is in
danger of being killed by her abuser as:
1. Gestures/threats of homicide/suicide.
2. Access to weapons.
3. Threats to hurt or kill pets.
What can be done?
v
v
v
Recognise that animals feel fear, pain, hunger,
thirst, cold, loneliness … like all sentient beings.
Teach this to children. Teach them to be kind to
animals, to care for and respect them.
If you’re a professional dealing with domestic
violence victims, do ask about the companion
animals to gauge the level of threat.
v
v
v
Insist on the enforcement of laws that protect
animals. Be willing to get involved in the legal
proceedings.
Get affected family members AND THEIR PETS out
of harm’s way.
Domestic violence shelters must help with
housing or finding shelter for pets.
v
Children tend to speak easily about their pets,
which provides an opportunity for intervention.
v
Include companion animals in protection/
restraining orders.
v
v
Veterinarians must report suspected cases of
animal abuse to the relevant authorities.
Report ALL forms of violence and abuse before
they escalate.
v
Report cruelty, abuse and neglect of animals to
an SPCA near you. And call the police. If possible,
take photographs/videos as evidence. n

26
southafrican CONVERSATiONS
sample content
grandmothers
holding families together all over South Africa
Grandmothers in historically
disadvantaged South Africa have
always played a big role in the
upbringing of their grandchildren.
This tradition is not a cultural
one, but one fashioned by the
demands of apartheid. Black
people were not allowed to be
in ‘white’ areas unless they had
a work permit to be there. They
were certainly not allowed to
bring their families with them.
Husbands and wives worked far
apart from each other and from
their rural homes where they
were forced to leave their children
in the care of a grandmother
or auntie. The trend continues,
because the majority of black
mothers simply don’t earn
enough to bring their families
with them to the towns and the
cities where the jobs are. Besides,
the places which they can afford
as accommodation are often
unsafe, or simply don’t have
enough space to accommodate
a family – like the ‘maid’s rooms’
in previously white back yards
everywhere in our country. So, the
children are still left with gogo.
There is another reason,
nowadays, why millions of
grandmothers are bringing up
their grandchildren: they are
either nursing their own children
who are dying of AIDS or they
have buried them.

southafrican CONVERSATiONS
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27
Photo | Tshikululu Social Investments | www.tshikululu.org.za | Courtesy of the First Rand Foundation
All over South Africa, these
grandmothers are holding families
together despite their grief –
often taking care of as many as
ten children on a meagre state
pension and, if she’s lucky, some
piece jobs.
At a time when she really should
be able to rest, her life is filled
with toil and suffering ... and
desperate poverty that she knows
will have dire consequences for
her grandchildren.
Here's what YOU can do to make a difference
• Stop justifying paying the minimum
wage to the women who clean
your house and support your life.
They are someone’s mother, auntie,
grandmother ... and the quality of their
lives is at your mercy.
• Start a support group at your church,
school or community center for the
women who take care of children in
their communities. Find out what they
need and start helping them practically
and materially.
• Give them access to information.
Make sure they know how to apply for
available social grants ... How to protect
themselves from getting HIV infected
when caring for an AIDS patient ... How
to grow vegetables to feed their family
... How to draw up a will to make sure
that their grandchildren will inherit
what is rightfully theirs ... How to
protect their human rights and what to
do if they are being abused ... How to
cope with the changing needs of their
growing grandchildren – including the
need for sex-education ... How to cope
with pain and loss ... And any other
subjects they want to know about. n

28
28
southafrican CONVERSATiONS
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These are words used in this issue of the magazine.
If you look up the meaning of every word you don’t
know, you’ll soon have an incredible vocabulary.
Dictionary
Accessible: the quality of being able to be reached or
entered
Accordance: in a manner conforming with
Accuracy: the quality or state of being correct or precise
Activist: a person who campaigns for change
Adequate: satisfactory or acceptable in quality or
quantity
Adverse: preventing success or development; harmful
Affluent: having a great deal of money; wealthy
Agenda: a list of items to be discussed
Alter: change in character or composition
Amicable: characterized by friendliness
Appropriately: in a manner that is proper in the
circumstances
Arbitrate: reach an authoritative settlement
Augment: make (something) greater by adding to it
Avoidance: keeping away from or not doing something
Bureaucracy: excessively complicated administrative
procedure
Capability: the power or ability to do something
Capacity: the maximum amount that something can
contain
Civility: formal politeness and courtesy in behaviour or
speech
Cohesion: the action or fact of forming a united whole
Collaborate: work jointly on an activity or project
Collectively: as a group; as a whole
Comprise: consist of; be made up of
Condescension: an attitude of patronizing superiority;
Conviviality: the quality of being friendly and lively
Cosmopolitan: including people from many different
countries
Deficiency: a lack or shortage
Demystify: make something easier to understand
Discord: disagreement between people; lack of harmony
Disseminate: spread (especially information) widely
Dissident: a person who opposes official policy
Enshrine: preserve (a right, tradition, or idea) in a form
that ensures it will be protected and respected
Entrench: establish (an attitude, habit, or belief) so firmly
that change is very difficult or unlikely
Equate: consider (one thing) to be the same as or
equivalent to another
Eradicate: destroy completely; put an end to
Erode: gradually destroy or be gradually destroyed
Exacerbate: make (a problem or bad situation) worse
Expatriate: a person who lives outside their native country
Fragment: a small part separated from something
Hamper: hinder or impede the movement or progress of
Impair: weaken or damage
Incalculable: too great to be calculated or estimated
Incomprehensible: not able to be understood
Infrastructure: the physical structures and facilities (e.g.
buildings, roads, power supplies) of a society or enterprise
Inherent: existing in something as a characteristic attribute
Integrate: combine (one thing) with another to form a whole
Intermittently: at irregular intervals
Intervene: take part so as to prevent or alter a result
Intrinsic: belonging naturally; essential
Intrude: put oneself deliberately into a situation where one is
uninvited
Languish: lose or lack vitality; grow weak
Liability: the state of being legally responsible for something
Malnutrition: lack of proper nutrition caused by not having
enough to eat, not eating enough of the right things to eat
Marginalise: treatment of a person, group or concept as
insignificant
Millennium: a period of a thousand years
Mobilise: prepare and organize
Moderate: average in amount, intensity, quality, or degree; not
radical Mortality: the state of being subject to death
Myopic: short-sighted; lacking foresight or intellectual insight
Obligation: a duty or commitment
Optimal: best or most favourable
Origin: the point or place where something begins
Oust: drive out or expel (someone) from a position or place
Perpetuate: make (something) continue indefinitely
Persecution: hostility and ill-treatment; oppression
Plight: a dangerous, difficult or unfortunate situation
Precedent: an earlier event or action regarded as an example
to be considered in subsequent similar circumstances
Premise: an assertion that forms the basis for something
Preserve: maintain (something) in its original or existing state
Prior: existing or coming before in time, order, or importance
Proclaim: announce officially or publicly
Profound: (of a state, quality, or emotion) very great or intense
Prospect: the possibility of some future event occurring
Reminiscent: tending to remind one of something
Reprisal: an act of retaliation
Resolution: a firm decision to do or not to do something
Robust: strong and healthy; vigorous
Sensationalist: a person who presents stories in a way that
is intended to provoke public interest or excitement at the
expense of accuracy
Signify: be an indication of
Subversion: undermining the power and authority of a system
Succulent: having thick fleshy leaves or stems adapted to
storing water
Surplus: something left over after requirements are met
Synonymous: having the same meaning as another word
Unacknowledged: not accepted, recognized, or admitted to
Unfettered: not confined or restricted
Wastrel: a wasteful or good-for-nothing person

50 Shades
of Love
southafrican CONVERSATiONS
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29
1. Passion 2. Joy 3. Intimacy 4. Respect 5. Friendship 6. Sacrifice 7. Compassion
8. Freedom 9. Inside Jokes 10. Safety 11. Laughter 12. Generosity
13. Consideration 14. Adventure 15. Excitement 16. Loyalty 17. Trust
18. Butterflies 19. Hope 20. Quality Time 21. Service 22. Empathy 23. Connection
24. Admiration 25. Patience 26. Appreciation 27. Commitment 28. Communication
29. Growth 30. Imperfection 31. Affection 32. Tenderness 33. Affirmation
34. Teamwork 35. Kindness 36. Equality 37. Pleasure 38. Compromise
39. Partnership 40. Independence 41. Happiness 42. Honesty 43. Devotion
44. Faithfulness 45. Fulfilment 46. Romance 47. Support
48. Family 49. Togetherness 50. Understanding
Photo: Jessica Felicio
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CONVER
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